Chapter 2
CHAPTER TWO
ORIETTA
Apackage had arrived for the man who was my obsession.
His sister’s name was written on it in thick, bold letters, contaminating our life with her presence.
He gave it a shake before ripping it open.
Dark hands crawled inside me. I wanted him to be mine.
Only mine. The contents might as well have been anthrax.
He was standing there in the middle of our living room, opening another woman’s package.
I couldn’t see past my monsters to fathom it was only his sister.
That was why I couldn’t be attached to this man.
He was pulling me down. No man was worth that.
I hated the smile that spread across his lips as he pulled out a t-shirt.
My chest tightened, and I turned to hide the burn in my eyes.
The coffee rippled in the cup I held. I didn’t understand why.
When I put it down, it rattled against the saucer.
I wasn’t going to look. I couldn’t not look, and before I knew it, my gaze was back on him.
The man I’d manipulated into a marriage.
He was perfect. Except for what he held in his hand, a worn black t-shirt with a skull and crossbones on it.
“It’s from my favourite band.”
As if I wanted to know.
He pulled off the t-shirt he was wearing, also black but new, which I had bought for him, and discarded it for the one that looked like it had been found in a rat-infested sewer.
“She found it in the attic.” He was holding up a note and read it aloud to me, “Mio caro Luigi, I found this in the attic among Mamma’s old things.
Remember how you used to wear this to seduce the girls?
It seemed to work, too. I thought you’d like to have it back instead of chucking it in the bin. Con amore, tua sorella, Gianna.”
A feral line of jealousy shot through my body. Intense hatred for the vile thing spread in my veins. Was he remembering the good old days? Regretting marrying me? Was that why he’d discarded what I’d bought to wear this?
His lips moved. I couldn’t hear him. My vision was blurred, and before me lay the future I had predicted, where he left me.
I was always suspended between two scenarios.
One where I let him go, and the other where I crawled after him and begged him not to leave me.
They both filled me with equal levels of dread.
His warm hands were on my face, and he was in front of me.
His grip was firm as he turned my face and looked into my eyes.
Searching for something as my chest banged with dread.
Was today the day? Then he crashed his mouth onto mine.
His attention was like a fired-up matchstick to dry hay.
Instantly, I went up in flames. My hands dug into his skull, pulling at his cropped hair as I climbed him and ground my hips to his.
If I held him tight, if I kept him inside me, he could never leave me.
We forgot the world outside and kissed and sucked the life out of each other like this was our last kiss.
Was it? He was thickening against me, but with a groan, he yanked his mouth away.
“I’ve got to go, porcospino, your brother is waiting for me.
” But I wasn’t the porcupine he made me out to be.
In his arms, I was needy, and I hated it.
I tried to pull him back. He didn’t give in and instead dropped me back on the cold stool. “Tonight,” he promised with a kiss on my forehead.
I jumped off it and followed him as he made for the door. “Are you going out like that?”
His gaze dropped to his t-shirt. He’d forgotten all about it. I hadn’t. With a soft laugh, he yanked it off and put on the one he’d discarded on the sofa.
He pulled me into his arms, and when he gave me a quick kiss, his lips barely touched mine.
Then he was gone, and with him he took the only good thing in my life.
The house warped into a prison cell again.
One of my own making. My back hit the door, and I dropped to my knees.
The dampness of the cold tiles penetrated my skin, spreading into my veins and rushing to my heart.
My reality had changed. I was left alone with all the monsters inside me.
All I felt was darkness and dread. Carrying the secret of my parentage for three months weighed on me.
Every day was doomsday. But today it was worse than yesterday.
My spine pebbled with goosebumps. His presence was dark behind me as I sat on the bed with my knees huddled. The sun was about to sink outside. So was the mood inside our home. I didn’t need to turn to know he was furious. As he should have been.
He should have known better. There was a meanness inside me that I had never hidden.
This was who I was. This was what I did.
I pushed him to the limit every time so that he would finally leave me.
I couldn’t help it any more than I could help breathing.
He and I were never destined to be. I wasn’t destined to anyone other than the monster chipping at my heart with a knife of cold steel.
Besides, men were never made to be monogamous.
They only brought you pain, especially if you handed over the reins.
It was better to get rid of him before he could have that power over me.
“What did you do?” His voice strained with disbelief, and it was that tone that made me turn to confront the result of my vengeance. Is he really surprised?
He was holding up his T-shirt, complete bafflement in his eyes, like he’d not seen this coming.
I shrugged. “I washed it.”
“In ninety degrees or what?”
“Thought you’d want it clean.” His eyes dropped to his precious t-shirt, now fit for a child.
When his gaze came back to mine, it was cold and dark.
I had yearned for this reaction. But it still scared me.
I’d never seen him this angry. Not even when I’d ripped the seat of his bike by putting his knife to it and slicing it through the middle.
“Then what?” He gritted. “You ironed the sticker?”
“Something like that.” I had ironed it five times and only stopped because the iron plate was completely covered with the burned plastic. Besides, the stench of it had made me want to empty my insides.
“Why?” His initial rage simmered down to pain. “Why would you do that when you knew how much I loved it? You didn’t even give me one day to wear it.”
His change of mood annoyed me. I didn’t want his pain. I wanted his rage. “It looks perfect to me,” I taunted him.
His mood flipped again. He was at the edge of the bed before my heart could thump again and yanked me to him with his hand on my ankle. The loud resounding noise came with a sharp sting and the print of his palm on my ass. “Apologise to me. Now.” His eyes begged and assaulted me at the same time.
I burst out laughing. The room echoed with insanity. It only made me laugh harder. This was it. I’d pushed him too far. He’d leave me now. I didn’t have to carry this burden anymore. The truth could come out because no one will be around to care about it.
“Shut up.”
I didn’t.
“I want to fucking kill you.”
I grabbed his hand and yanked it to my throat. “Do it then.”
He shoved me away and slapped my ass. The bite of pain brought an explosion of pleasure.
I wanted him to throttle me with his bare hands and put an end to it.
But instead, he flipped me over onto my belly and crawled on top of me.
His hand cupped me between my thighs and rubbed the satin.
It was wet and sticky. He was neither gentle nor slow.
My pleasure skyrocketed. His dick was hard against my ass, but his groan was tormented as he hooked his finger around my crotch and yanked, the fabric ripping apart in his hands.
I wiggled my ass, needy and greedy as he fumbled with his belt.
He kept my face pinned to the bed, fisting my hair and shoving my head deeper into the mattress.
The next instant, he was pushing inside me.
My groan vibrated into the thick form as I tried to move, to push back, to feel him against me.
But he held me prisoner and fucked me roughly from behind.
I wanted this moment to last, so I could cherish it.
This was going to be our last fuck before he left me.
But delayed gratification wasn’t my thing, and I was already pulsing around him.
He got rougher, and every time his pelvis slapped against my ass, I slid forward on the mattress until finally my head was bonking on the headboard like a rhythmical drumbeat.
“One fucking day,” he gritted. “Couldn’t you have given me one fucking day?”
Never. He should have known better.
He yanked my head back, the grip stinging my scalp. It tingled my senses. I started to clench around him.
“Don’t you dare fucking come.”
He never learned. I bucked my hips and rode out the pleasure mounting inside me, clenching around him as I exploded with a moan.
Behind me, his hands dug into my ass as he emptied into me with a groan. Pumping roughly until he was finally empty.
He shoved off me instantly. I hadn’t even turned around to relish the damage I’d done before he’d staggered out of the room. The loud thud of the front door slamming shut told me this time it really was the fucking goodbye I had known it would be.