Fallon #3
He writes back immediately.
Lloyd: I thought maybe you’d fallen asleep.
Diane: Nope. Not without my wine and Lloyd.
Lloyd: How was your day, angel face?
He started calling me angel face, and I swear it makes me blush like a schoolgirl every single time, especially since he’s never even seen my face.
Diane: It was long and exhausting.
Lloyd: Want to talk about it?
Diane: Nope. We’re not talking about our jobs, remember?
We agreed to avoid work conversations weeks ago. We generally avoid topics that would make it easier to find out who the other person is, both enjoying the anonymity of our relationship.
Lloyd: Okay, but just know I’m here if you want to talk. Any Thanksgiving plans?
Diane: My ex, my daughter, and some extended family and friends. You?
Lloyd: My ex and my son. It’ll be small.
Diane: Not your daughter?
Lloyd: Unfortunately she has plans with friends.
I’ve gathered in our conversations that his relationship with his daughter is strained, and it’s upsetting to him. He usually goes a bit quiet when I bring her up, though I can tell he’s proud of whatever she does. I decide to lighten the conversation. I need playful banter tonight.
Diane: Who’s your celebrity crush?
I see three dots for a long while. I’m sure he’s overthinking it. He tends to do that at times.
Lloyd: I can’t say I’ve been asked that very often, but I loved the movie Varsity Blues when I was in college, and I love Landman now, so I guess I’ll say Ali Larter. Such a natural, timeless beauty.
I nearly spit my wine out. People have been telling me for well over twenty years that she’s my doppelg?nger. She’s a little older than me, and I’m a bit curvier than her, but I can see why people would say that.
She also wore a whipped-cream bikini very famously in Varsity Blues. Countless football players in high school, who were also obsessed with that movie, asked me to don that bikini. It used to annoy me.
Wow. What are the chances that she’d be his crush?
Diane: Was it the whipped-cream bikini that sucked you in?
Lloyd: Ha ha. There’s not a man in the world who hasn’t fantasized about that, myself included. What about you? Who’s your celebrity crush?
Mine is a little weird because I’ve met him. I don’t think I’ll give Lloyd a name.
Diane: He’s a sports figure.
Lloyd: You like them that young? Maybe I’ve got your age wrong.
We haven’t officially exchanged ages. It’s become a running joke trying to guess, though I suppose it’s always me trying to guess his age.
Diane: I didn’t say he’s a player, did I?
Lloyd: Ah, perhaps a sportscaster?
Diane: Not that either. That’s all you’re getting from me. A girl needs to have her secrets.
Lloyd: I’m too old for secrets.
Diane: How old are you?
Lloyd: Old enough that in elementary school, we made ashtrays for our parents in art class.
I giggle.
“Mommy,” a sweet little voice croaks from my doorway.
I look up to see a sleepy Harper standing there in her pajamas, rubbing her eyes. “What’s wrong, baby?”
“I’m parched.”
I smile at her word choice as I motion for her to come join me in bed. “I have a bottle of water right here.”
I quickly shoot a message to Lloyd, letting him know motherhood has called and I need to cut our conversation short before placing my phone down on the night table.
Harper crawls into my bed and downs half the bottle of water before snuggling up to me. I hold her tight as I inhale her hair, taking comfort in the familiar strawberry scent of my little girl.
She looks up at me with turquoise eyes just like mine. “I like that I get to be with you every night. I miss you so much when I sleep at Daddy’s house.”
Tears immediately flood my eyes while my heart feels the squeeze that only a divorced parent can understand. “Me too, baby. Me too. But I’m always thinking about you and missing you when you stay at Daddy’s house. Every single second.”
She nods. “Do you think Daddy misses me when I’m at your house?”
“I know he does,” I answer without hesitation while giving her a reassuring squeeze.
“I don’t remember when we all lived together in New York, but the past few weeks have been the best. I really like us all living together. I get to see both of you every night before I go to bed.”
I don’t know if my heart can take this conversation. Putting on my best brave face, I say, “It’s like a big slumber party, right?”
She nods. “Yes, and I love it so much.” She’s quiet for a moment before asking, “Are you going to move back to your house soon?”
“Eventually, but not yet,” I answer. I was actually going to talk to Tanner about doing so sooner rather than later.
Bailey is out of the woods. I live nearby.
I can come and give her therapy without living here.
Now I’m reconsidering. Maybe Harper needs this time with us.
Something special for her to remember. The only time she’ll remember living with both of us.
I think I’ll shelve that conversation until after the holidays.
I can stay and give my baby one special holiday season with both her parents.