Eeleven
Shane
Just moments ago, the news of Melanie’s miscarriage shattered my heart into countless pieces. The thought of losing the opportunity to become a father, of our unborn child never getting the chance to experience life, was excruciating. But, witnessing that little girl calling Melanie ‘mommy’ with a hint of fear in her voice, everything was clear. My heart broke again, this time into more pieces than it was made of. I couldn’t understand why… Why did she keep the pregnancy a secret? Why did Callan lie to me she miscarried? Why did she place her trust in Callan over me?
Fuck.
Why did she rip away my chance to be around her while she was pregnant, my opportunity to see how my daughter came into this world, and finally, my chance to be a father? I had been robbed of the opportunity to witness the first smiles, the first words, and the first steps of my daughter. I couldn’t say a word. I just stood there, staring at Melanie. A wave of sorrow and anger washed over me. I’d always known she could be the reason my life imploded. And so she was.
My gaze darted to the little girl again, and fuck, with a single glance at her face, I just knew she was mine. She was my daughter. A destructive kind of regret surged through my veins. How I wished to turn back time. How I wished I could go back in time and be there for Melanie during her pregnancy, holding her hand while waiting for the arrival of our child together. Our daughter. But now, the harsh reality set in. To her, my own daughter, I would be just a stranger now. A man who appeared out of nowhere, disrupting the world she had come to know. At one point, the little girl’s eyes locked with mine, and a single tear dropped down my cheek. I stood there, paralyzed, as did Melanie and Anders. Silence, complete silence, and darkness enveloped us. I felt helpless. For the first time in my life, I felt so helpless. Involuntarily, I fell to my knees, as if my body refused to listen to me. As if all the strength in me had drained out of my body. Nothing in this world could possibly bring me to my knees. Nothing ever had. Until now. Only the sight of the daughter I didn’t know existed had such power over me. I couldn’t tear my gaze away from that little girl. What led us to this point? What led us to cause that irreversible damage to each other?
“I’m sorry, dear, I couldn’t catch her.” An unfamiliar voice of an older lady snapped me back from my thoughts. “She was running so fast,” the lady added, guilt visible on her face. I knew she was there to watch over Hope while Melanie couldn’t, to help her hide my daughter from me. My despair was slowly turning into wrath, realizing how well Melanie had arranged all this. How she kept my child a secret from me, with a babysitter to help her and Anders by her side. Anders instead of me. I was seething inside. Fuming.
“Please, take her upstairs,” Melanie hardly managed to say as she turned to the lady. She quickly wiped away tears and kneeled to the little girl. “Sweetheart, Mommy needs to deal with something here, and then I’ll join you and Betty, okay?” Watching Melanie talk to the little girl, I felt a sting of pain in my heart. As if someone had put a knife in it and torn it apart.
“Come on, Hope.” The woman smiled at the girl, reaching for her hand. Hope. Her name was Hope, and I had to learn it like this… by accident.
“It’ll be best—” Anders began to say, but I swiftly rose to my feet and gripped him by his collar, barely containing myself from putting a bullet in the head of this fucking traitor.
“Don’t you dare open your mouth!” I hissed with lethal rage. If a gaze alone could kill, mine would. “It’s between Melanie and me.”
Anders’ muscles tensed. “I’m her fiancée, and—”
“I don’t give a fuck!” A dark growl rumbled in my throat. “I don’t care about anything but my daughter now!”
Anders scoffed, a wicked grin curling up his lips. “Why do you assume that she’s yours?”
“Maybe you’ll try to convince me that she’s yours?” I shoved him away, my fists clenching and shaking, rage filling every fiber in me.
I was fed up with the games and audacity he still tried to fool me with these lies. I knew Anders was sterile. We both knew it. Usually, that’s something I wouldn’t use against him, but given the circumstances now, I didn’t care about him or his feelings at all. I was raging. They kept my daughter a secret from me, and he still tried his chances to deceive me. Although the truth was just right there before my eyes.
Anders clenched his jaw, his eyes darkening with fury. “She’s—”
“Anders, please, leave us alone for a while.” Melanie’s fragile voice broke through the deadly tension between us. “Please,” she pleaded, and I squeezed my temples in anger. I couldn’t believe this was happening.
“Alright. I’ll go to Hope. She got scared.” His words felt like a knife piercing my heart. He knew where to hit for me to feel the pain, and he went for it. He knew how much I would suffer, knowing that my daughter felt safe in his arms while she would be scared in mine.
“Let’s get inside,” Melanie said with a faint whisper as she turned and headed inside, her body trembling, tears dripping down her face.
She led me toward the dark living room, only lit by the moonlight sweeping through the window. She turned to me, and I found so much fear in her eyes. She was quivering, crossing her arms defiantly as if she wished she could vanish this very second. Her lashes were wet and heavy with tears as she gazed at mine, but she didn’t say anything. She was merely shaking uncontrollably.
“Is that little girl my daughter?” I asked, my tone harsher than intended. I was sure Hope was mine. I felt it in my bones, but I had to ask anyway. I had to hear it from Melanie, face to face.
“Yes, she is,” she admitted, and my eyes shut momentarily as I exhaled a heavy breath.
“At least you didn’t stoop so low to try to convince me she’s someone else’s,” I stated sternly, rage boiling in my veins. But after getting the confirmation I needed, I became even more furious. Furious that she kept my daughter from me in cold blood, very aware of what she was doing. “How could you, Melanie?” I roared, towering over her, and she took a slow step back, tear after tear streaming down her face. “How could you steal three years of my daughter’s life from me? How could you rob her of three years during which she could’ve had a loving father?”
Melanie shook her head, her eyes narrowing. “A loving father?” she hissed, and although her voice was filled with rage and pain, she kept her tone low, perhaps to shield the child upstairs from hearing the confrontation. “Are you for real now? Everything I’ve ever done was to protect her!” she snapped through clenched teeth. “Callan told me everything! He told me that you wanted me to get pregnant only to kill me and the baby later!”
Once again, I felt like the words were a knife crossing my heart.
“For God’s sake, Melanie! Do you even hear yourself?” I yelled, taking a deep breath to temper my anger. I squeezed the bridge of my nose. I had to maintain composure for Hope’s sake. “How could you trust him without giving me a chance to explain?” I hissed in a lowered tone, fixing a piercing gaze on Melanie.
“And what was there to explain?” she cried, tears flowing freely, her emotions breaking free. Vulnerable as she was. “You wanted my death. You wanted me to go through the same as your mother! You wanted me to share her fate!” she accused, shaking her head, her tearful eyes never leaving mine. “And she died while pregnant, didn’t she?” The fact that Melanie believed in Callan’s twisted lies shook me to the core.
“She did, but that doesn’t change the fact that you chose to believe Callan over me!” I growled, my frustration and pain increasing. “I thought you knew me! I thought that you knew that I’d never want to harm my child! How could you even think I’d desire my own baby’s death, Melanie?”
“Oh, I don’t know! Maybe you tell me!” she retorted sarcastically, and it hit me hard. How wrong I was about her.
She put so little faith in me while giving it all to others. To him, her ex-boyfriend, who she knew damn well turned against me, his friend, to get in her head. I couldn’t believe she was so blind, so oblivious to their schemes, that she didn’t see all this. I got that she could doubt me after learning the truth about my initial intentions toward her, but blindly following Callan without giving me a chance to explain was beyond my comprehension. It was too much. “You know what? Just forget it,” I hissed. “No explanations from your mouth will make any sense. I’ll never understand how you could’ve believed him!”
I stepped forward, looming inches away. I ran my hand through my hair, attempting to rein in my anger but failing miserably. “Melanie, if you had told me you were pregnant, I would’ve been the happiest man alive. Didn’t you see how insanely in love with you I was?” I implored, my gaze flickering between hers. “I would’ve done anything for you. Anything.” I squeezed my pulsing temples as I turned momentarily, struggling to contain my wrath. “And you, in return, chose to believe everyone but me. On top of that, you kept my daughter a secret! Fuck!” I spat, banging my clenched fist against a wall.
She stood there, her eyes filled with tears, lips trembling. And I… I needed to let it all out.
“I couldn’t forgive myself that I hadn’t told you about that damn revenge, that I even agreed to it in the first place. I kept searching for you like a fool for those three years! And when you’re back, you throw in my face that you’re my brother’s fiancée and having fun with him while I, like a fool, still love you!” My voice broke, and I saw regret wash over Melanie’s face. She seemed genuinely surprised by my words, which pained me even more as it only proved to me that she thought I was ready to harm her and the baby. That getting her pregnant was a part of my twisted revenge.
“Shane…” she began, but I cut her off, my despair and wrath taking over.
“No. Do whatever you want with whomever you want. But you have no right to keep my baby away from me,” I shrieked, my tone warning while looming over her again. “You ruined your life, my life, and our daughter’s life at your own damn request! You took three years of her life away from me already. I will not let you keep her away from her father, not for one more day! I’m filing for custody tomorrow,” I hissed with a level of anger that frightened even me. I never thought I could harbor such resentment towards her, but she was no longer the fragile rose I once knew. She had revealed a dark side that even I didn’t know existed. Then, it hit me. Melanie had married Callan. Fuck. I closed my eyes, squeezing my temples.
“What last name does she have?” I asked with a dark tone, hoping not to receive the answer I had already suspected.
Melanie did not respond. She simply stared at me, sobbing and shaking her head.
“I’m asking what last name my daughter has?” I repeated, glaring into her eyes with towering wrath.
Melanie’s voice cracked as she admitted, “Sinclair.”
My heart sank. Darkness enveloped me, a dangerous, deadly fury consuming every fiber of my being. Fuming, teeth gritted, hands clenched into fists, I had never felt such intense anger, pain, and sadness all at once, rushing through me with equal force. “I’ll take care of that, too. My daughter won’t have another man’s last name for even one more day,” I hissed through my gritted teeth, struggling to breathe as if I was suffocating. “I’ll never forgive you,” I uttered quietly, my tone of anger and pain. My gaze flicked back and forth between hers. “First, Callan wanted to steal my life, even my family, and you allowed it. Now, Anders is doing the same, and what do you do? You let him,” I erupted with resentment, which caused Melanie to sob harder. “You want to play these wicked games? Fine. But involving our daughter in this... That was a dirty trick for you to pull, wasn’t it?” I shot her a menacing glare.
“Shane, please, let me explain,” she pleaded, reaching for my arm, but I swiftly and instinctively pulled away from her touch.
“You never gave me a chance to explain.” My voice was barely above a whisper now. “I’ll come back in the morning to meet my daughter. And for fuck’s sake, please don’t try to come up with some shitty excuses to stop me.”
I sped down the road, driving ahead in an unknown direction, my vision blurred. Gripping the steering wheel tightly, I hoped the pressure might somehow alleviate the pain and anger swelling within me. My muscles tensed, my jaw clenched. I fought to suppress the tears threatening to escape. My mind immediately created pictures of Melanie pregnant with our child. The tender moments of touching her belly, sharing kisses, and feeling the baby’s kicks. All the scenes of us together during childbirth, then returning home as a complete family.
All gone now.
“Damn it!” I smashed my fist on the steering wheel. I felt like my life was slipping out of my hands like grains of sand, and I could do nothing to catch it. They stole it from me. From us. I didn’t know who I hated more or who I blamed more. Callan, Anders, Melanie, or perhaps myself.
I found myself at the graveyard, not even sure how I got there, standing before my mother’s grave. Moonlight illuminated her name engraved on the stone. Though the chilly wind wrapped around me, I was burning inside. Burning in pain, burning in rage.
“I have a daughter, Mom,” I whispered, crouching down to touch the cold stone, seeking a connection with the mother I had long lost.
“She’s as beautiful as her mother. They’re two peas in a pod.” A faint smile crossed my face as I recalled Hope’s features. Then, reality crashed back, flooding my heart with pain once again. “You know what hurts?” I wiped away a tear that reached my mouth, my voice hushed. “Tonight, when she got scared, he went to her. My brother. He tucks her into bed at night, not me. He gets to see her smiling eyes as they play, and I don’t. She probably loves him, but she still doesn’t love me... and I don’t even know if she’s going to love me one day.”
Quivering, I struggled to stay upright. I took a deep breath and ran my hands across my face, closing my eyes and inhaling the crisp, chilly air deeply.
Give me strength, Mom. Help me get through all of this. I’m begging you.
The remnants of that night drifted by in sleeplessness. My mind was incessantly weaving elusive scenarios of what I could have had with Melanie. I kept replaying my past, analyzing my choices, mistakes, and everything that led me to this point while contemplating the future. What it would look like now, what to do or how to act, and what I truly desired.
I took a cold shower to clear my restless thoughts, hoping it would replace the sleep I lacked. I put on a thin black sweater, and light pants, and draped a matching-colored sweater over my shoulders. I decided to skip the formal suits or blazers I usually wore. It was the first time I was supposed to meet my daughter and I wanted to seem… warm. If that was even possible.
I glanced at my reflection in the mirror, I noticed a subtle shift in me. It wasn’t just the rugged, dark stubble that had grown over the past few days or the styling of my hair to the side. I was a father now. I felt like I had to make sure I was worthy of that title. I was now responsible for another human being.
I stood at Anders’ door, gently knocking. I felt anxious to meet my daughter. All the way here, I imagined possible scenarios of what to say, how she would react, and how the meeting could possibly go.
“What do you want?” Anders’ harsh voice jolted me from my reverie as he grumbled, swinging the door open and leaning against the frame. His eyes were puffy, and it was clear he hadn’t gotten much sleep that night either.
“I came to see my daughter. Melanie knows I was supposed to come,” I stated sternly.
Anders scoffed, taking a swig from a bottle of whiskey. “So, she hasn’t run to your arms after all?” I wasn’t sure if the remark was meant for me or himself. He was numb and intoxicated, plain drunk, which concerned me.
“Where’s Melanie?” I was getting impatient.
“She moved out.” The news hit me hard. She couldn’t do that to me, not again. “She fucking left,” he blurted with pain in his voice, and judging by his state, I was ready to believe it genuinely hurt him.
Desperate for answers, I questioned, “What? Why?”
“Well, maybe because running away is the only thing she’s good at?” He was completely inebriated.
Enraged, I grabbed him by his shirt. “Don’t tell me you let her go just like that?”
Anders shifted his gaze between mine, scoffing as a pained grin spread across his face. “Just so you know, brother, I won’t stop fighting for her and Hope.”
“You call yourself my brother? I can’t believe my daughter has lived under the same roof as you, and you didn’t say a word!” Issuing a stern warning, I added, “Stay away from my family! I know you don’t love them. You just wanted to get back at me. You’re sick! Fucking twisted.”
Anders shoved me away, gulping his whiskey as he set his drunken, numb gaze on mine. “I did want to get back at you, brother. But then… I fell in love.”
My eyes closed for a split second. “You fucking bastard, do you even know what love is?” I spat, and without waiting for a response, I stormed back to my car, leaving only the squeal of tires. I had to find Melanie and my daughter.
I made countless calls, rallied all my men across the entirestate, and mobilized all my connections so they would help me locate them and stay alert.
Eventually, I returned to my penthouse, clinging to the hope that Melanie might seek refuge in my arms, as Anders implied. But she wasn’t there.
“No, Wyatt. I’ve checked all the airports, and there’s no trace of her. Have you checked hotels?” I paced around my living room, adrenaline surging through my veins. Suddenly, I heard a soft knock at the door, and my heart skipped a beat. My gaze switched to the entrance instantly. “I have to go. Someone’s at the door. Keep me updated.” I quickly ended the call and ran to open the door.
And there she was, Melanie, holding Hope in her arms. She greeted me with a quiet and hesitant “Hey,” her voice trembling, just as her body; her gaze was restless. Offering a faint and uncertain smile, she asked, “May we come in?”