Chapter 7
Emerald
I slept disturbingly well. Which honestly felt offensive considering the circumstances.
Normal people probably didn’t sleep peacefully beside dangerous men capable of ruining lives with a single phone call.
Normal people probably didn’t wake up warm and relaxed after spending the night tangled against the chest of someone the entire city was likely terrified of.
Meanwhile, I had slept like a spoiled house cat wrapped in cashmere. Not a single nightmare. Not one moment of tension twisting me awake. Just warmth, steady breathing, and Nikolai.
The memory alone made heat creep slowly into my face while I stared at the ceiling, silently questioning every life decision that had somehow brought me here. Fantastic. Apparently, my survival instincts had officially packed their bags and left the country.
Instead of panicking over the fact, I’d fallen asleep in his bed, my brain kept replaying smaller things instead.
The weight of his arm around my waist. The rough drag of his fingers against my skin before sleep finally pulled me under.
The low sound of his voice near my ear when he thought I was half asleep.
Safe. That was the worst part. The devil himself had somehow made me feel safe.
That should’ve concerned me way more than it currently did.
I rolled onto my back with a groan, dragging both hands over my face while memories from last night continued replaying against my will.
Nikolai looking at me across candlelight like I was something dangerous for him too.
The way his body had relaxed slightly once I curled against him.
The slow rise and fall of his chest beneath my cheek while rain hammered against the windows outside. God.
A very embarrassing part of me wished something more would’ve happened.
Not because I didn’t understand exactly how reckless that would be.
I did. Fully. Painfully. Horrifically. But there had been moments where tension wrapped so tightly between us it felt alive.
Moments where his hands lingered too long.
Moments where his mouth brushed my temple while he thought I was asleep, and the way he looked at me sometimes…
Jesus Christ. Like he was barely holding himself together.
I squeezed my eyes shut. Nope. Absolutely not. I was not going to stand here fantasizing about Nikolai Voss first thing in the morning like some emotionally unstable fan girl.
Though honestly, in my defense, I should’ve worn something cuter yesterday.
Instead, the man got stuck sleeping beside me while I looked like I’d lost a fight with the clearance section at Target.
The oversized T-shirt practically swallowed me whole, the sleeves hanging past my hands while the shorts I’d worn underneath had definitely not been flattering enough for accidental mafia sleepovers.
If I’d known Nikolai freaking Voss was going to hold me all night, I would’ve at least attempted to look hot.
Instead, I gave him exhausted raccoon chic.
The oversized shirt shifted against my skin again, carrying the faint scent of Nikolai with it, and my entire body immediately betrayed me. Seriously?
I looked down at the fabric like it had personally attacked me. “This is psychological warfare,” I glared.
The smell clung to the shirt in the worst possible way. Dark spice, cedar, and something smoky underneath it that wrapped itself around my lungs every time I breathed in. The kind of scent that belonged on expensive cologne ads and emotionally unavailable men with criminal records.
Naturally, my brain chose violence, because instead of acting like a normal person, I grabbed the collar of the shirt and inhaled again. Deeply. Heat curled low through my stomach so fast it nearly pissed me off.
“Oh my God…”
I yanked the shirt over my head so aggressively it almost got stuck before launching it onto the bathroom floor.
“What the fuck is wrong with me?” I whispered.
This was how women ended up making terrible life choices, and ending up starring in documentaries titled She Thought He Could Change. One minute you were kidnapped. The next you were standing half naked in a bathroom sniffing your captor’s shirt like a psychopath.
I turned the shower on hotter than necessary and stepped beneath the steam, hoping boiling myself alive might reset whatever insanity had taken over my nervous system.
Hot water poured over my skin while steam filled the room around me, but it did absolutely nothing to calm the chaos inside my head.
If anything, it made things worse, because now there weren’t distractions. No sarcasm. No arguing. No pretending I didn’t notice the way Nikolai looked at me sometimes.
I closed my eyes as water slid down my shoulders.
The man terrified people without even trying.
Men twice his size stepped carefully around him.
Guards straightened the second he entered a room.
Even silence felt heavier when he was in it, and somehow that same man had held me gently last night like I was something precious.
That truth sank deeper into me than I wanted it to. Which was honestly unacceptable.
I finished showering faster than necessary after that thought, refusing to unpack whatever emotional damage was currently forming.
By the time I stepped back into my room, steam still clung faintly to my skin while droplets of water trailed slowly down my back beneath the towel wrapped tightly around me. My hair hung damp over my shoulders as I rubbed another towel against the ends distractedly .
A knock sounded at the door.
“Come in,” I called automatically. Nothing. I frowned slightly. Another knock.
“Oh my God, dramatic much?” I called before walking toward the door.
I expected the chef. Probably breakfast and coffee considering everyone in this house seemed deeply committed to keeping me fed like an emotionally unstable zoo animal.
Instead, the second I pulled the door open, my breath caught. Nikolai stood there. Black dress shirt. Dark slacks. Tattooed hands. His eyes that darkened the moment he saw me. If that was even possible. His eyes lowered straight to the towel.
His entire expression sharpened instantly, something dark and unreadable crossing his face while his stare burned hotter against my skin.
His gaze dragged slowly over my bare shoulders, down the damp skin of my throat, lower toward my legs before lifting back to my face. Heat climbed violently up my neck.
“Oh.” Brilliant response, Emerald. Truly intellectual. “I thought you were breakfast,” I blurted.
One corner of his mouth twitched slightly. “Disappointed?”
“No. Just emotionally unprepared. ”
His eyes darkened further somehow. Which honestly felt greedy at that point. I tightened the towel instinctively before stepping backward.
“Okay, give me like two seconds to get dressed because this currently feels illegal.”
I started shutting the door. Nikolai’s hand caught it instantly. The solid force of it stopped the movement completely. My breath hitched.
“Nikolai—”
His gaze locked onto mine, and every ounce of humor disappeared from his face. The air between us tightened. He stepped forward, fast. I barely had time to register what was happening before his hand wrapped around my throat. A gasp caught in my chest. The moment stole my ability to think.
Holy shit.
Nikolai pulled me against him hard enough for heat to explode through my entire body before his mouth crashed against mine.
The kiss wasn’t gentle. It wasn’t hesitant. It felt like restraint finally snapping. I made the mistake of moaning against his lips almost immediately. His grip tightened slightly against my throat in response.
His mouth moved against mine with devastating intensity, and suddenly breathing felt optional. My fingers twisted into the front of his shirt while his other hand slid against my waist, pulling me flush against him. Every inch of him felt dangerous. Warm. Solid.
The kiss deepened until my knees nearly betrayed me completely. Nikolai kissed like a man trying to consume every thought left inside my head. Like obsession. Like he’d spent the entire night fighting himself and finally lost.
He broke away only long enough for both of us to breathe. His forehead pressed against mine while his chest rose heavily beneath my hands.
“If you keep making those sounds,” he said roughly, voice dark enough to send heat spiraling through me again, “I’m going to end up fucking you on that bed.”
My stomach flipped violently. Most reasonable women probably would’ve panicked. Unfortunately, I had apparently lost the ability to be reasonable around this man. So instead, I looked directly into those dark eyes and whispered:
“What if that’s what I want?”
Nikolai went completely still. The space between us thickened with something dangerous, something that felt alive beneath the surface. Nikolai’s hand still wrapped around my throat while his dark eyes searched mine like he was trying to decide whether I understood what I’d just said.
The heat was still spreading through me from the kiss, pooling low in my stomach while every nerve ending in my body felt painfully awake.
My chest rose unevenly against his, breaths tangled together in the tiny space between us.
And God, the way he was looking at me…like restraint was hanging by a thread.
My pulse stumbled harder when his gaze dropped slowly over my face before lowering farther.
To the towel. A wave of sudden self-awareness slammed into me instantly.
I was standing half naked in front of Nikolai while my hair dripped onto the floor and my lips were swollen from kissing him. Wonderful. Absolutely fantastic.
Heat crawled violently up my neck. His hand flexed slightly against my throat. Then, without thinking, I did something incredibly stupid. I let the towel fall. The fabric slipped from my fingers before landing soundlessly at my feet.