Chapter 1 #2
I had stopped wondering if every holiday was going to be the day that he proposed.
After seven years and three kids, he never mentioned marriage.
I wasn’t the type to constantly drop hints about getting married, but when people asked what we were waiting on, he never seemed to have a clear answer.
I didn’t see myself with anyone else. I didn’t want to be with anyone else, but when I thought of my future with Corey, lately I didn’t get butterflies.
I found myself wondering if he’d checked out of the relationship mentally. And if so, how could I fix it?
After taking a quick shower, I dressed in black, wide leg sweats from Alo, and a fitted black tank top.
On my feet, were black and white Louis Vuitton sneakers, and I used the matching headband to push my hair back off my forehead.
Corey wasn’t exactly stingy or cheap, but I also didn’t want to ask him for hundreds of dollars for bundles or wigs, so I often just washed my own thick, shoulder-length hair and put loose curls in it.
I hadn’t gotten lash extensions in years even though I could do my own.
My natural lashes were kind of long, however, so mascara was good enough.
I’d also stopped getting my nails done. I did get pedicures.
I got enough makeup jobs to be able to get monthly pedicures and massages. Those were my two non-negotiables.
“I’m definitely getting a facial,” I mumbled while inspecting my golden skin in the mirror. It pissed me off when pimples or dry skin left me with dark marks on my face. They were small and I only had three, but I wanted my skin tone even and smooth.
My entire life I’d been told I was pretty.
Since I liked doing makeup, pre-children I hardly ever went anywhere without my face beat.
Since having kids, I only wore makeup on special occasions.
In the five years since having the triplets, I’d walked and worked out enough to have a small stomach, but it was nowhere near flat.
I liked cute matching lounge sets, but it was rare that I wore anything other than leggings, yoga shorts, and sweats.
I was cute enough around the house but lately everything was more about comfort and whatever was fast and easy.
I hadn’t even been on a baecation, girls’ trip, or a solo vacation in about three years.
Life had gotten real routine and predictable.
It was odd that life could be hectic but boring at the same time.
I brushed my teeth and completed my skincare routine.
At 5’7, I carried my 156 pounds well. It was a fact that I could work out a little more.
Maybe eat a little healthier, but I didn’t have too many complaints when it came to my body.
It was amazing that my stomach even went back to normal after the way it was stretched out while carrying triplets.
When I was ready to go, Corey was on the phone, but I walked over and stood in front of him. His brows lifted like he was asking what I wanted.
“Bye.” I raised my brows too.
“Bye, babe. You need some money?”
“No, I’m good.” I was slightly disappointed but rather than showing it, I leaned down and placed a kiss on his lips. There was a time that Corey kissed me at least three times a day. That too like everything else was fading.
In the car, I tried to tell myself that maybe I was overreacting a bit.
We just needed to spend some time alone.
Do something romantic. Maybe I’d ask him if he would take a few days off, and we could go to Hawaii or somewhere.
The entire drive was consumed with me thinking of ways to put the spark back in my relationship.
I lived outside the city limits, so by the time I got to the restaurant, Alisa was already there.
“Hey, boo.” I walked in and found her sitting in the waiting area.
Alisa was 5’8 and built like a stallion. Her deep brown skin was radiant, and her shoulder-length locs were freshly twisted and smelling like mangos. We hugged briefly, and the hostess showed us to a table.
“They have the best frozen margaritas,” I looked over the menu. “I have to work later, so I’ll refrain.”
I already knew what I wanted, so I didn’t have to study the menu.
Alisa always ordered the same thing as well, so she didn’t need the menu either.
I did notice that she seemed to be avoiding eye contact with me.
After waiting for a few minutes to see if she was going to say anything, I broke the silence.
“Is something wrong?”
When Alisa’s eyes met mine, a lump formed in my throat. Whatever she was about to reveal was something heavy. I braced myself for bad news.
“What is it?” my tone was low and nervous while my pulse throbbed at the base of my throat.
“You know I mind my business.” Alisa began toying with the corner of a cloth napkin. She had gone back to avoiding eye contact. “I don’t like to get in people’s business, but I love you, and I have to tell you.”
Words became tangled in my throat. I thought something had happened with her.
Never had it crossed my mind that the bad news was for me.
Women’s intuition made my stomach do somersaults.
If she was about to tell me something bad, I already knew it was about Corey.
Since I didn’t respond, Alisa’s orbs met mine, and she sighed.
“My little cousin, Imani, is twenty-three. She doesn’t know that you and I are friends.
She posted a few stories to her close friends last night, and she was getting a tattoo.
Corey did her tattoo, and he was being real touchy feely.
I screen recorded it so you could see for yourself.
I wouldn’t have brought shit to you that was just bullshit flirting.
But he crossed the line, and I felt like you needed to know. ”
Not only were Alisa’s eyes filled with regret, she appeared nervous, and I could understand why.
However, I wasn’t one of those people that would get mad at a friend for telling me about my no-good man.
The anticipation of what she was about to disclose had my palms beginning to sweat, and my previous statement went out the door.
When the server came over, I ordered a margarita and told her to make it strong.
“Let me see it.” Clearing my throat, I shifted in my seat.
I never had an issue with Corey tattooing women.
I’d never been insecure or worried about him cheating.
Not because I trusted him so much, but triplets took up a lot of my time.
Even when the girls were at school, I spent a lot of time tending to my household.
Cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, trying to find a minute for myself.
Maybe I was stupid enough to believe that he wouldn’t mess up his family. Stupid dumb ass me.
I couldn’t believe that as I reached for Alisa’s phone my hands were trembling.
She had already pulled up the video. All I had to do was press play.
I watched the woman that had to be her cousin, pull from a blunt.
Corey placed his lips damn near on hers as she blew weed smoke into his mouth.
My heart hammered in my chest as he buried his face in the crook of her neck, and she squealed.
The woman who was gorgeous, bit her bottom lip as Corey whispered in her ear.
Being the punk ass bitch that I was, I gave the phone back to Alisa as bile rose in my throat. “I don’t want to see anymore. That’s more than enough. Did she tell you they slept together?”
It was my turn to avoid eye contact. I was embarrassed.
Hurt. Off the top of my head, I couldn’t remember the last time that Corey had put his lips on me without me being the one to initiate it.
But he had his lips practically on hers?
There was no way they were just client and tattoo artist. How many women had he done this with?
How many times had he cheated on me? Was I really that na?ve and blind to what my husband had been doing in his spare time.
“She did.” Alisa’s tone was barely audible, but I heard her loud and clear.
Her response pierced my soul the same way a knife could have.
“I’m sorry, Brion. I know you love him. You two have spent a lot of years together, and you have three kids.
Whatever you decide to do, there will be no judgment on my part. I just couldn’t keep it from you.”
Even if I could find my voice, I didn’t know what to say.
I knew Alisa was a genuine friend. She didn’t find pleasure in giving me the news.
My friend damn near looked like she wanted to cry while I blinked back tears.
Closing my eyes, I willed myself to get it together.
I had a right to be hurt. Breaking was normal.
But not in the restaurant. There was a fine line between being vulnerable and being weak.
“Whatever I decide to do,” I chuckled. “What can I do? Either stay with him and side eye him every time he leaves the house for the rest of my life, or pack up three kids and move them from the only home they’ve ever known.
” The mere thought of such a task made my voice crack.
“Fuck,” I finally allowed tears to spill over my lids but quickly wiped them away as the server came over with our drinks.
“I know you’re on your lunch break, so go ahead and order your food. I lost my appetite.” Staring off to the side, I couldn’t believe how fast things had gone to shit.
I had gone from simply wondering what was up with my relationship to having actual proof that Corey had indeed checked out. He gazed into ole girl’s eyes and looked at her with lust that he hadn’t displayed toward me in months. Hell, maybe a year.
“I’m so sorry, Brion.”
“I feel pathetic enough. Please stop apologizing. Thank you for telling me. Had you not, I’d still be at home clueless. I doubt this was the first time. I’m so dumb.” Fresh tears began to flow, so I covered my face with my hands.
I didn’t want to break, but if I had to, I knew I was safe in the presence of Alisa.
When I finally uncovered my face, Alisa was dabbing at the corner of her eyes with a napkin.
Despite my stomach feeling sour, I picked the margarita up and sucked through the straw feverishly.
I was so pissed; I ignored the brain freeze I got like it was nothing.
“What am I supposed to do, Alisa? Move in with my parents? I have like $4,500 in my savings. That will barely even pay the first months’ rent and deposit on a place.” I kissed my teeth.
“I can’t tell you what to do, but whatever you do, I’m here for you. If you need a job, you can be my paralegal.”
“Really?” my pulse quickened. “I thought the office had a paralegal.”
“We do, but if you think I won’t create a job for you, you’re out of your mind. It’s not a lot, but I can at least pay you $22 an hour.”
“Thank you so much,” I rubbed my temples. Getting a job, juggling the girls and work, it was going to be a lot. But I had to do it. Staying with Corey for the sake of keeping things easy wasn’t an option.
By the time I downed my drink, I didn’t feel better, and it was time for Alisa to go back to work.
She took some sushi to go, and I stayed and had another drink.
Halfway through, I knew if I didn’t eat something, I’d be sick, so I ordered steak and fried rice.
I was only able to eat a few bites, but that was better than nothing.
On the drive home, I felt like a zombie.
After I realized that I drove right through a red light, I erupted into tears.
Gripping the steering wheel, I forced myself to get my head in the game.
I couldn’t kill myself just because Corey was a cheater.
I had three children to live for. No matter how long ahead the road was or how hard it would be, I had to do what I had to do for my daughters.
Corey wouldn’t get multiple chances to play in my face.