Chapter 44 #2
“I like to be in control. You’ve called me bossy before, but you have no idea of how bossy I can get in the bedroom. There will be times I want total control. Of everything.”
“Everything?”
“Yes. Sometimes it will be a full submission night and when you walk through the door of the bedroom, there will be no negotiations, no saying no, no pausing or stopping when you cry or scream.”
“No safeword?” she whispered hoarsely. She couldn’t decide if her heart was racing out of fear or anticipation.
Actually, it might be a bit of both.
“Hey, there will always be a safeword. Always. Understand?”
Maya nodded as relief filled her.
“And there won’t be any play like that until you are certain that you are ready. No, until I’m certain that you’re ready. Because I’m not sure that you won’t just tell me what you think I want to hear. So we’ll both need to be sure that you can handle that. More, that you want it.”
“All right,” she said.
“What is your safeword?”
“I just . . . I went with red. I know it’s boring, but I?—”
“It’s not boring, Spitfire,” he told her. “It’s easy to remember and it makes sense. You should use whatever you are comfortable with. It’s not a competition to get the most interesting safeword. All right?”
“Yeah. That’s what I thought. I figured I would remember it since I’ve read about . . . about subs using it before.” She knew her cheeks were hot and that he could see her blush when he brushed his fingertips over her face.
“My beautiful girl. You are so brave. What about birth control? I’m clean, I’m checked regularly.”
“Um, it’s been a long time for me and I’m clean too. I have an implant.”
“Good,” he murmured. “Now, let’s look at your wishlist.”
“I don’t . . . there’s not really anything on it. I don’t know what I need.”
“Well, we know you like Lego.” He wrote that under wishlist.
“But I don’t need any,” she told him. “I have plenty.”
“There’s always room for more.”
“There literally isn’t,” she replied. “My house is bursting at the seams.” She paused, feeling slightly ill as she remembered she had no idea what state her house was in now. “Well, it was bursting at the seams. Do you think it’s still liveable?”
“We’ll have to wait and find out. And we can find room for everything,” he said vaguely.
“I really do have heaps.”
“Bébé, you need to learn when to stop arguing,” he told her. “Just so you know, the time was after your first protest. Then you should have stopped and said, ‘thank you, Papa.’”
She still wanted to argue since she didn’t want him spending his money on her. That just felt wrong. He was already doing so much for her. However, this seemed to be something he wanted.
“Thank you, Papa,” she told him.
“That’s my good girl. And obviously you like strawberries and dolphins. Do you have any outfits with those things on them?”
“Outfits? Um, no. Not unless my pajamas count.”
“Not exactly what I meant, as cute as your pajamas are.” He made a note of something. “How old is your Little? Or how young does she regress to?”
“Um. Well, I don’t know if I’ve ever really thought about it.”
“What do you like other than playing with Lego?”
“I don’t . . . I don’t know. I’ve never done much more.”
“Coloring?”
She wrinkled her nose, shaking her head. “Oh, I thought it would be nice to have a veterinary service. Where I could be like the vet and take care of all the animals . . . but that’s probably silly since I already have my very own live pets.”
“Bébé, we need to get something clear. Nothing that you do or want could ever be considered silly. Understand? I am not going to judge you. So just tell me what you want. It’s my job to get it for you. Within reason. I won’t ever do anything that will harm you.”
“All right,” she whispered. “I guess I don’t regress to being a baby. I don’t want to wear diapers. I’m not really interested in sleeping in a crib.”
“Hmm, we’ll see. You could always take naps in it. Or in the bed. Training pants? Or are you fully toilet trained?”
“Fully toilet trained,” she said in a high-pitched voice.
“All right, we’ll see how you go. Especially during naps.”
“I don’t really have time for naps.”
“What else do you have to do here, Bébé?”
She thought about that for a moment. He wasn’t wrong. What else did she have to do? She didn’t have a job to go to. Sure, she had her babies, but they didn’t take up all of her time.
“I have to walk the dogs, feed all of them, play with them.”
“That’s not going to take all day. And I’m here to help. With that and everything else. Like I said before, if you wanted to spend most of your time in Little headspace, I would fully be behind that.”
“You would?”
“Absolutely.”
“I don’t know if I’m ready just yet for that.” But the idea intrigued her. “How long do you think we’ll be here for?”
“I don’t know, Bébé. I’m hoping that it won’t take them too long to find Vince and the person threatening your father, if that’s a different person. But I also hope we get some time here to ourselves.”
So did she. She definitely wasn’t objecting to that aspect.
“You ever thought about a pacifier?” he asked.
“I don’t . . . I’m not young enough for a pacifier,” she told him. Although the idea of having something to suck on intrigued her. “I did hear that it can help get you to sleep. Sometimes I have trouble sleeping.”
“You don’t have to be a certain age to have a pacifier. A lot of Littles of all ages use them. You could try it. If you don’t like it, you can get rid of it.”
“Um, all right. But we don’t have any of that stuff.”
“I’m going to put in an online order.”
“You are? Do they deliver out here?”
“They will to the nearest town. We can go in and pick it up. All right, I have a few things to go on. But right now, there’s one thing we need to do.”
“What’s that?” she asked, wondering what it was.
Please let it be playing with Lego.
She really missed her Lego.
He lifted her off him, then stood and held out his hand. She slid her hand into his and let him draw her up to lead her down the hallway.
“It’s time for your punishment.”