Chapter 10 #2
“A team of trainers, all taught by you. The premier place to earn experience.” I bounced on my toes. “Oh, Hudson, that’s it! Not only a place to train the horses but to train the trainers.”
His fingers raked through his hair, the sun lighting strands to a golden hue. “I don’t know about that, Olivia. I haven’t trained a horse in years.”
With my hands on my hips, I marched over to him, looking between him and the two horses in the field.
“Did they come with the farm?”
“Well, no. I had to sell the ones the ranch hands used when I was liquidating.” He scratched his head, a shadow crossing his eyes. “Trying to find enough money to save it.”
“And those two?”
He gave me a shrug. “I got Honey right after you left. Bought her as a foal back home. Ivy came from a ranch a few towns over from here. They were going to put her down. She was too unruly, and they deemed her untrainable.”
“Yet there she is. Doesn’t look like trouble to me.”
He glanced over at the horses. “Yeah, she’s a good horse. Not sure why I didn’t sell her with the others. Knew I wouldn’t sell Honey. She’s what spurred me to come out here. To leave the company.”
“Your mom?” I asked, curious about what had happened.
She was nothing like Hudson. Where he was a dreamer, she lived for her business.
Driven and successful. Intimidating the few times I’d met her.
Now, I doubted I’d think the same given what I had turned into, but back then, she’d made me uncomfortable.
“Yeah.” His eyes took on a faraway look. “Pissed her off something fierce. She gave me enough to get me started. I think she thought I’d fail right away and come crawling back home.”
There was something more he kept to himself, his eyes taking on a faraway look. I wasn’t so sure I had the right to ask, given our situation.
“But you didn’t.” It wasn’t a question. It was a pronounced statement because this was Hudson. Not stuffed in a suit, sitting behind a desk, closed in by walls.
“Nah. Not the life for me. I considered it for a minute when I put the ranch up for sale. Your brother’s offer to keep me on and let me stay here is the only reason I didn’t.”
And my anger at Gabe for sending me here diminished significantly.
“Guess you need to go through numbers to see if this will work?” he asked with an abrupt change of subject.
“Budget is Tori’s thing, but I’ll need to know what’s needed to make it work. Then I can send her my findings and see what she says. Gabe’s notes suggest he’s not concerned with spending on the project.” Which was very unlike my brother.
“Then let’s go spend his money.”
“It’s my money, too,” I said, catching up with him as he walked away.
“That makes it even better.”
Sharp stones dug into my feet, and I hopped back onto the grass. My boots were still dangling in Hudson’s hands, and I considered the ball of socks in my hand, not particularly keen on asking him to carry me back.
He stopped and looked back at me, a devious grin forming when he realized I couldn’t walk over the stone driveway. Holding the boots up, his brow lifting, he said, “Looks like you need me.”
The words hung between us, driving like a knife into my chest because I really did need him. I always had, and only now did I see how badly.
“Maybe,” I answered.
“Tell you what.” He folded his arms, tucking the boots under one. “Tell me why you started that fight and I’ll come to you.”
I drew in a sharp inhale that was like glass scratching its way into my throat. “What does it matter? It’s been over fifteen years.”
“Because the longer I’ve thought on it, the more it pisses me off.”
My lips thinned. “I’m not going back to that day. Now hand me the boots.”
“Not until you tell me why.”
But I couldn’t. There was too much, and going back to that day would wreck me again, sending the pieces I’d stitched together unraveling until my foundation faltered.
Sending tears I’d locked away since I was a child tumbling free, and I wasn’t certain they would ever stop.
Decades of bottling up my tears was bound to leave its mark.
“No.” I took a step onto the gravel, wincing as it dug into my foot. Then another, biting my lip. I was adept at suffering emotional and verbal agony, but not physical. That was Gabe’s burden, the one he had borne for me.
I stopped and rolled my lip under my teeth, biting into it to dull the sting of the stones.
“Goddamn stubborn woman.” In two strides, Hudson swooped me into his arms. He trudged back to the house, dumping me on the bottom step of the porch before he stalked past me and slammed the front door open. I heard the boots drop before he stormed past me again
“Go inside. I’m not ready to talk about numbers. I need to get away from you.”
I stared at his back, then at the truck as it tore down the drive, sending stones flying in its path.
Defeated, I dropped to the stairs and stared out at the land, pondering if admitting the truth would have been worse than this, if setting my tears free was a bad thing.
They had festered inside me for so long that their weight was familiar, and I didn’t know if I knew how to live without them.
Hudson didn’t return, and I found myself on the couch, flicking through television channels until exhaustion set in and I fell asleep.
I woke to find a blanket over me, the television off, and the morning sun streaming in through the windows.
With a yawn, I sat up and looked at my watch.
Nine-thirty. I’d slept for over fourteen hours.
More sleep than I’d gotten in far too long.
I pushed the blanket off, thinking it a sweet touch that Hudson had covered me. In the kitchen was a note saying he was tending the horses, and there was cereal in the cabinet.
Cereal? What grown man still ate cereal?
I chuckled, thinking of how Reid had made me eat his marshmallow cereal with him.
The memory flicked to nights with Hudson, where we shared a bowl of cereal, curled up on the couch while we watched a movie.
The memory caused a smile to fight my grimace, and I rubbed it away.
Heading upstairs, I found my new clothes neatly folded on the bed. Hudson. He’d finished my wash and not only brought it up but folded it. The depths of this man were too complicated to understand.
I showered, trying to ignore Hudson’s products and chastising myself when I sniffed his aftershave.
Pulling on a clean pair of jeans, I rubbed my hand down the fabric, wondering why I never wore them or dressed comfortably.
I once had. I’d convinced a friend to go to the city and shop with me, then hid the jeans from my father until I’d moved to school.
The day I met Hudson was the first day I’d broken out of my formal attire and tried something new.
I grabbed a shirt from the pile, this one gray with short sleeves.
It wasn’t bad. Not the material I would normally wear, but it was soft on my skin and emphasized my small chest. It hugged my figure just as well as one of my dresses.
Pulling out a pair of socks with kittens on them, I shook my head and tugged them on.
Then I took my phone out and shot a picture of my feet, sending it to Gabe with a terse, I hate you.
He was quick to answer with a laughing emoji. Dots appeared before he added, Are you wearing jeans?
Liv: I really hate you.
I could hear his laughter with every damn emoji he sent. Five in total.
Liv: I have ideas. Can you do some research on horse auctions?
Gabe: Sure thing. I knew you would.
Liv: I’m sure that’s the only reason you sent me here.
Gabe: Maybe.
Liv: Give the munchkin a hug for me.
Gabe: Look at you softening up, Auntie Liv.
Liv: Shut up. I hate you again.
Gabe: You’ll get over it.
The phone landed with a muted thud when I tossed it on the bed.
Returning to the kitchen, I contemplated the coffee maker.
This I knew how to use because I had a similar one at home.
It was rare I made my own coffee, but at least I wouldn’t invite Hudson’s teasing with this task.
I found the mugs, grabbing one with a logo on it.
While I hunted in the refrigerator for creamer, there was a knock on the door.
I straightened, wondering how weird it would be if I answered Hudson’s door.
Not that there was anyone else to do it.
I strolled over and opened it to find Jessie with her hands full.
Behind her, dark clouds filled the sky, casting thin streams of sun through them.
The wind whipped her blonde hair around.
“Mornin’, Olivia.” She pushed past me and went straight to the island, where she placed the bag.
“Sorry, I didn’t know Hudson was expecting company.” I wanted to kick myself for having apologized. Men didn’t apologize, as my father had scolded, so neither should I. And I never had. Until I found myself here, in this convoluted mess.
“He isn’t. Dennie shut the diner down early.
The storm’s coming, and businesses are shuttering up.
It’s gonna be a nasty one. We had soup from last night’s dinner, and I thought I’d bring you all some.
Hudson had two bowls last night.” She turned to me while I let that statement roll around in my head. “You weren’t there, though.”
She took the large containers to the refrigerator as if she lived here and put them inside.
“Sorry, but why are you in here like this is your house?” There I went again with the apologies, and now there was an edge to my tone.
It sounded nasty. She’d been nothing but nice to me, but seeing her in his house, comfortable enough to walk right in, brought a sting of envy I didn’t know what to do with.