Chapter 38
Dash
Whether I return or not is irrelevant. Mila has claimed a piece of me that I never knew existed. A part of me too frail to survive my world.
Maybe that ’ s why I ’ m cruel to her. She showed me what compassion was. Instead of running terrified, she fell for a broken, used, and abused demon.
My mom would have loved Mila; she would have demanded I treat her like my equal.
Perhaps I would have.
Love needs constant attention. Hate, well, that needs nothing but an empty void. I feel that emptiness as soon as Mila leaves, when my fingertips can ’ t brush against her flesh, when my eyes can ’ t look at her beautiful face.
I feel incomplete more often than content.
My future will be filled with people who require my attention. I ’ ll never have sufficient time for Mila.
I need her to know that.
I need my little fox to know this is all she can have; stolen moments.
She ’ s a thief. That ’ s always what she was, a sly fox. I just taught her how to accept her true nature.
“ You never really had me,” I tell her. Each syllable that leaves my wicked tongue feels like a lashing cutting me so deep it scars my bones.
It ’ s better this way. I don ’ t want Mila to live a life of waiting, of having expectations. I know my words are evil, but it ’ s the only way I know how to help her grow stronger.
I ’ m trying to help her. I always said I would fix her.
I also said I might break her after I watched her grow.