Chapter 6
Ruby
My stomach was in knots, twisted so tight I could barely breathe.
I'd thrown up twice the night before. Once around two in the morning, hunched over the toilet with my hair plastered to my sweaty forehead, and again just after dawn when the first pale light crept through my bedroom window.
I kept watching the clock, the minutes crawling by, each tick of the second hand feeling like an eternity.
I'd been so distracted all morning that I burnt a whole pan of cinnamon rolls, the sugar caramelizing into black, acrid smoke that filled the kitchen and made my eyes water.
Then I did it again with a pan of scones, leaving them in too long while I stared out the window, lost in thought, my mind a thousand light-years away.
Teddy was at Mei's for now, but he would be home around noon.
The thought made my chest tighten, my ribs feeling like they were closing in around my lungs.
I was so nervous I was about to scream, my hands trembling every time I tried to knead dough or frost a cake, leaving fingerprints in the buttercream and uneven ridges in the bread.
I'd made up my mind, though. Cristox was a good male.
He always was, even back then when everything went to hell.
And he had a right to know he had a son.
The realization hit me like a freight train the night before when I saw him standing in the cottage.
I hadn't realized just how much Teddy and Cristox looked alike until that moment.
Teddy had his father's eyes—those same warm, honey-brown eyes that seemed to see right through you and caught the light like molten gold.
He had Cristox's soft pelt, too, that downy fur that covered his arms and legs in a fine, velvety layer, and that thick dark blonde mane that I'd always loved running my fingers through when I braided it.
But Teddy's other features were mostly human—my nose, my mouth, my bone structure.
He was a perfect blend of both of us, a living testament to what we'd shared.
I was going to tell Cristox. I had to. And I was going to let him see Teddy, let him meet his son.
But I was also going to insist that Cristox not reveal to Teddy who he really was.
Not yet. Especially if he was only going to be on Tau Ceti for a few weeks before leaving again.
It wouldn't be fair to Teddy to have his father walk into his life only to disappear just as quickly, like a comet blazing across the sky and then vanishing into the dark.
No little boy deserved that kind of heartbreak.
Mei agreed with my plan, and she'd offered to help keep Teddy occupied and away from Cristox if he didn't agree to my terms. I hoped it wouldn't come to that, but I was prepared to do whatever it took to protect my son.
The chime above the bakery door rang out just as I was boxing up Mrs. Durray's order, the cheerful tinkling cutting through my anxious thoughts. I glanced up, my heart lurching into my throat.
Cristox.
He was early. Of course he was early.
He stood in the doorway, his massive frame filling the entrance, those golden eyes scanning the shop until they found me.
The sight of him stole my breath. He wore simple clothes—a dark tunic and pants that looked like Tau Ceti standard issue—but nothing could make him look ordinary.
Not with that leonine mane that framed his face in waves of bronze and gold, the powerful build that spoke of strength and grace, and that tail that swished once behind him before going still, the tip twitching with barely contained energy.
Our eyes met, and for a moment, the world narrowed to just the two of us. The bakery, the customers, the smell of fresh bread and sugar—all of it faded away until there was only him, only those eyes that had haunted my dreams for years.
Then Mrs. Durray cleared her throat, and I snapped back to reality.
"Sorry," I said, forcing my attention back to the boxes in front of me, my vision swimming slightly. My hands were shaking so badly I nearly dropped the twine. "Here's your buttercrust, Mrs. Durray. Two loaves, still warm."
"Thank you, dear." Mrs. Durray took the boxes, but her gaze had already drifted past me to Cristox, her eyes widening with undisguised curiosity. "My, what a handsome male. Don't see many of them on Tau Ceti."
"He's just a friend," I said quickly, too quickly, the words tumbling out in a rush. "Visiting from off-world."
Mrs. Durray collected her loaves with a knowing smile that made my cheeks burn hot enough to bake bread on. "Good to see you, Ruby. Same time next week?"
"Yes, of course. Thank you."
I walked her to the door, hyperaware of Cristox's presence, of how he stepped aside to let her pass, nodding politely, his mane catching the light from the window. The moment the door closed behind her, I flipped the sign to "Closed" and locked it, my fingers fumbling with the bolt.
Silence fell between us, heavy and charged.
"Ruby," he said, and his voice was deep, warm, with a slight rumble that seemed to resonate in my very bones.
"Come on," I managed, gesturing toward the back with a hand that wouldn't stop trembling. "Let's talk in private."
He hesitated, his tail twitching. "Are you sure? I don't want to cost you business."
"I always close from eleven to noon," I said, leading him through the doorway into the adjoining private dining room, my legs feeling unsteady. "I need time to prep for the lunch rush."
It wasn't the whole truth. That was when I worked with Teddy on his lessons, but I wasn't ready to tell him that yet. Not until I'd explained everything else first.
I busied myself at the sideboard, needing something to do with my hands.
"Sit, please," I said, pulling out a few pastries from the display case.
A couple of cinnamon rolls with their spirals of sugar and spice, some croissants still flaky and golden, a few of the chocolate-filled ones that were Teddy's favorites.
My hands steadied as I arranged them on a plate.
"Can I get you some coffee?" I asked, reaching for the carafe I always kept warm.
"Coffee?" His voice brightened, the sudden enthusiasm catching me off guard. "Yes, please."
I turned to look at him, surprised. "You drink coffee?" Most aliens I knew likened it to warzog spit—whatever that was.
"I discovered it aboard the Historia," he said, boyish enthusiasm lighting his features. His tail swished once, a gesture I suspected meant he was pleased. "There are several humans in the crew. They introduced me to it. I love it."
Despite everything—despite the tension and the years and the fear coiled in my chest—I felt my lips twitch into an almost-smile. "How do you take it?"
"Black. Strong."
"Of course you do," I murmured, pouring two cups, watching the dark liquid stream into the mugs, the rich aroma filling the small space.
I added cream and sugar to mine, watching the cream swirl and bloom, then brought both mugs to the table where he'd settled.
The chair looked almost comically small beneath his large frame, but he sat carefully, mindful of his size and strength.
I set the plate of pastries between us and took the seat across from him, wrapping my hands around my mug, letting the warmth seep into my fingers.
For a moment, we just sat there in silence. I watched his tail move restlessly behind him, curling and uncurling, the tip flicking back and forth like a metronome counting down to something inevitable.
"Ruby," he said finally, his voice low and rough. "I need to apologize for the shock you suffered yesterday." He stopped, his jaw working. "I never, ever wanted to hurt you. You have to know that."
My throat tightened, tears threatening to spill. "I know."
"After I was rescued from the gladiator pits," he continued, his honey-gold eyes fixed on mine with an intensity that made my breath catch, "I looked for you.
I searched everywhere. But my cousin Tarrick—he was the one who assisted in your rescue—he thought you had been taken to Earth. " His tail lashed once, sharply.
I stared at him, my heart pounding. "You looked for me?"
"Of course I did." His voice was fierce now, passionate, but not angry. "You think I could just forget? I needed to see you, to explain... What we shared, what happened between us..."
My eyes burned with unshed tears. "Cristox, that's... that's actually why I wanted to talk to you."
He went very still, his entire body freezing, his tail stopping mid-curl. "What do you mean?"
I took a shaky breath, wrapping both hands around my mug. "I wanted to tell you what happened. After you rescued me."
His eyes searched my face, and I noticed the tension in every line of his body, in the set of his broad shoulders, in the way his claws flexed against the table. Waiting. Bracing himself.
"When I came to," I said quietly, "I was in a medi-unit on the Ardeese Valout space station.
" The memory was still so vivid—the sterile white walls that seemed to glow with their own light, the strange humming of alien medical equipment, the overwhelming confusion and fear.
"They told me I'd been through trauma. That I'd been drugged and needed time to heal before transport. "
His tail twitched, a small, anxious movement that betrayed his concern.
"I was scheduled to return to Earth," I continued, my voice barely above a whisper, each word feeling like it was being dragged from somewhere deep inside me.
"Everything was arranged. The transport, the required memory wipe, all of it.
" I paused, my heart hammering so hard I could feel it in my throat, in my temples, at every pulse point.
"But they did a final medical scan before departure. "
"And?" His voice was strained.
I met his eyes, saw the concern there, the fear. "And that made going back to Earth impossible."