7 | Samaj
Once we left the tattoo shop, I dropped Simone off at her place.
“Thanks for bullying me to come out tonight.”
“Boy, I did not bully you.” She rolled her eyes. A hint of a smile on her lips.
“Mm-hmm…we’ll agree to disagree.” I replied pulling her into a hug.
“Goodnight.”
“Goodnight, let me know when you make it home.”
As soon as I stepped into my apartment, I kicked my shoes off at the door, already mentally preparing to crash. I had just pulled my hoodie over my head when a hard knock rattled the front door. I already knew who it was before looking through the peep hole.
He stood there hands buried in the pockets of his hoodie, his shoulders tense in a way that didn’t match his usual unserious persona.
“Kadeem, it’s after 11 p.m., did you make the wrong turn or something?” I asked, leaving the door open as I walked further inside towards the kitchen.
“Nah,” he muttered, stepping inside. “I’m about to go meet up with my brother. Just needed some advice first.”
That alone stopped me. Kadeem never came to me for advice. He was the advice-giver, unsolicited, unwanted, and wrapped in foolishness or bluntness that usually came from a genuine place, but may not always have the best delivery.
I flipped on the kitchen light and grabbed two waters from the fridge, tossing one to him. “Talk to me,” I said, leaning against the counter. “What you and your brother about to get into?”
I knew of his older brother Mo, short for Mohammed. But I’d never seen him. Never heard his voice. Never met the man. And the way Kadeem spoke about him? Let’s just say it didn’t exactly remind me of my relationship with Shiloh.
He twisted the cap off his water but didn’t take a sip.
“That’s what I wanted to talk to you about,” he sighed. “Mo and I have always been close. My parents would say we’re like the black Batman and Robin. We look out for each other, and I’d do anything for him, but right now something seems off.”
“What makes you say that?”
“He’s constantly keeping tabs on me. I can’t go too far or have too much fun without him checking in. And it’s not ‘check in’ like I want to make sure you’re good. It’s more like… surveillance. Like, he wants to make sure I don’t do anything that he wouldn’t approve of.”
The way he said it made the hair on the back of my neck stand up.
“Soon as I graduate,” he continued, staring at the floor, “I’m going straight into working with him. And whoever the hell he’s connected to.”
I frowned. “Connected to like what? A business?”
He shrugged. “Yeah. Something like that.”
He looked nothing like the Kadeem I knew. The guy who cracked jokes during the most serious moments and who flirted his way out of trouble. Right now, he looked like someone carrying a weight no twenty-three-year-old should be carrying.
“You should only do what you want to do,” I told him. “It’s your life. Not his. Not your family’s.”
He shook his head before I even finished.
“It doesn’t work like that.”
“Kadeem—”
“I don’t have much of a choice. I’m my brother’s keeper.” he said.
The silence that followed felt thick. Heavy.
Like the kitchen air shifted into something colder.
I’d known him since freshman year. We were opposites.
Me quiet, him loud; me cautious, him reckless.
People saw the playboy, the party boy, the chaos king.
But I always saw the mask underneath. And right now, for the first time ever, the mask wasn’t just slipping, it had fallen clean off.
“You talk to your brother about how you feel?” I asked.
He sucked his teeth. “Feelings don’t matter. Not in this. Every time I talk to him, he reminds me this was the plan. That I gotta stick to the plan.”
“And that plan being what exactly?”
His phone buzzed.
He checked it.
Whatever he saw made his face harden. He drained the rest of his water as if it was something stronger, then finally answered.
“I wish I knew,” he said. “All I know is I’m a piece on a chessboard. And it’s almost time for me to get in position.”
He shoved his phone into his pocket and headed for the door.
“Kadeem,” I called after him, “you know you can talk to me about anything, right?”
His shoulders tensed. But he didn’t turn around.
“I know,” he said softly. “That’s why I came tonight. Thanks for letting me blow off a little seam. I gotta go. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Then he slipped out the door like a shadow.
I locked it behind him, but the heaviness he brought in stayed behind settling on my chest long after he’d gone.
The next morning, I hit the gym for a little bit, before hopping in the shower to get ready for the day. As I got in my car an unexpected call from my mom came through the Bluetooth speakers.
“Hey ma, what’s up?”
“Hi baby, I’m fine. How are you? How’s everything been?” I hadn’t really spoken to my mom since the incident. When I got back in town, we texted a few times, but my mom was still a mystery these days and her and my dad were still at odds.
“I’m good, about to meet up with a friend to help her out with something.”
“Ohh, a girlfriend huh?” My mom and I used to be close. We would talk about anything and everything but with her being so distant I haven’t shared too much with her even though deep down I wanted to. Maybe this could be the beginning of us getting that close bond back.
“Her name is Simone. She’s good people. I think you’d really like her.”
“Aww then it looks like I’ll have to meet her soon. Speaking of soon. I think we should hang out tomorrow night if you’re up to it.” That made me perk up even more.
“Yeah. I’m down. I can come pick you up around 6 p.m.”
“Okay, great I’ll see you tomorrow. I love you. You know that right?”
I inhaled a deep breath.
“I know, mom. I love you too.”