23 | Samaj
With my flight being delayed two hours I pulled up later than I planned, but the second I stepped inside the shop, the energy hit me. Music blasting, people laughing, the whole place buzzing. I dapped up a few familiar faces before running right into Emon.
“My bad, I’m late,” I said, pulling him into a quick hug. “Happy birthday, my G. And congrats. This looks insane.”
“Aye, I’m just glad you could make it. I can’t thank you enough for that donation you made to help put this whole party and grand opening together.” he grinned.
“No need to thank me. It’s all love.”
“Come on, let me show you around.”
We walked through the space, and I tried to lock in, nodding along as he pointed out different areas: the tattoo side, the barber stations, the lounge he put together in the back. But my mind wasn’t fully there. Not even halfway.
All night, I’d been wrestling with this pull in my chest, because I knew I’d be seeing her after six months of no contact.
And then of course someone from my past popped up out of nowhere.
“Samaj? I thought that was you!” she said, smiling way too hard. Jackie or Jasmine I couldn’t really remember her name, I just knew she was a girl from my past I messed around with a couple of times and right now I wasn’t really interested in catching up with her. I forced a polite nod.
“Hey. Good to see you.” Hoping she would read the room and go about her business, but she kept talking, asking questions, laughing, trying to inch closer taking up my personal space. I glanced at Emon, hoping he’d save me, but he had already drifted off to speak with the DJ.
That’s when it happened. Something shifted in me.
Like my spirit straightened up. I scanned the room, thankful that I was tall enough to peer over a lot of people, I spotted her—Simone stepping out of the lounge area.
And man… for a second, I forgot how to breathe.
The Instagram pictures I had stalked a few times over the months didn’t even come close.
The gold dress hugged her just right, her long ponytail swinging behind her, her skin glowing under the lights.
She looked like she was looking for someone, probably Emaree but when her eyes finally met mine, everything else blurred out. It was just us.
Whatever plan I had to play it cool went out the window. Simp.
“Hey, I’ll catch you later,” I said quickly to the woman still talking to me, not giving her a chance to respond before I walked straight toward Simone. She saw me coming, and her lips curved into that soft smile that’s been stuck in my head for months.
“Hey,” I said, trying to keep my voice steady.
“Hey, you,” she replied.
For a second, I didn’t know whether to hug her or not, so I kept my hands to myself. “You look…amazing.”
A faint blush touched her cheeks. “Thank you. You do too. I wasn’t sure if I’d see you tonight.”
“Yeah, I flew in not too long ago,” I said.
“Oh ok. How long are you down here?”
“Quick trip. I leave Sunday evening.”
I paused, choosing my words carefully. “But I’d like to spend some time with you. If you’re free.”
Her lips parted. “Um—”
But she didn’t get the chance to finish, because Emon and Emaree hopped on the microphone.
“Yo yo yo!” The whole crowd turned their attention to the duo that stood by the DJ at the front of the shop.
They thanked everyone for coming out, trading jokes and love the way only siblings can.
I watched Simone lift her phone to record, smiling with that same soft pride she always has for the people she cares about.
The cake came out, everyone cheered, candles blown, and then the DJ dropped the next track.
“This one’s a special request from the birthday girl!
” Emaree looked straight at us. “If you got somebody special in the building, bring ’em to the dance floor.
Shout out to my other brother from another Mother Samaj in the building!
” She winked at us before turning to the DJ to hand back the microphone.
“She did not just do that!” Simone gasped.
Emaree was the best wingman, and I had to remember to thank her later for the solid she just did for me.
I’d reached out to E the week prior to get her address so I could ship her birthday gift, and I may have used that as an opportunity to ask her how Simone was doing.
Her relationship status and if she’d be here tonight.
One of my last questions had been the hardest to ask.
“Do you think I got a chance at getting her back?” Her response was honest but also hopeful.
“Only if you’ve done the self-work and you’re ready to give it everything you’ve got this time. ”
Before I could overthink it, I reached for Simone instinctively, without hesitation, I pulled her a little closer as the crowd pressed in around us. Muni Long’s “Made for Me” filled the room, and when Simone turned to look up at me, her eyes said everything she didn’t have the courage to voice yet.
Our bodies fit together like no time had passed.
She wrapped her arms around my neck, and I rested my hands along her waist, and we started moving like this was muscle memory.
Like we were built to move together. I’m not going to lie—I didn’t want the song to end.
I didn’t want the moment to break. Didn’t want to let her go. Not tonight or ever again.
“I missed you. More than you know.” I spoke. I felt her body react almost like she was holding her breath and finally released it.
“I didn’t handle things the right way and if I could do it over again, I wouldn’t have pushed you away like I did.
I’m sorry. I know right now is not the right time to get into all that, but I just needed you to know.
” She looked up at me like she was searching for something she wasn’t ready to say.
“Thank you and I missed you too.”
After the song ended, we found the rest of our friend group. Emaree introduced me to her new boyfriend Donovan. I didn’t really know what to think about him. He seemed cool but for some reason I couldn’t see him fitting in with us.
For the sake of Emaree, I would play nice and give the man a fair chance though.
“I see you out here doing the lord’s work making the DJ play that song.” I said leaning in making sure only she could hear me.
She laughed. “I told you I’m rooting for ya’ll. I saw ya’ll over there making googly eyes at each other.” I couldn’t help but smile. “Appreciate you and Happy Birthday.”
We enjoyed the rest of the night eating, talking, and vibing.
It was like old times minus Kadeem and his presence was definitely missed.
Him and I didn’t talk much but when we did I could tell there were still some things he was dealing with that he wasn’t ready to discuss.
I found myself praying for him often and hoping that whatever he had going on would work itself out soon.
“Did you drive?” I asked, turning my attention to Simone. It was getting late and the party was finally dying down.
“No, I caught an Uber.”
“Ok cool, let's tell everyone we’re leaving, and I will take you home.”
I escorted Simone to my rental and when I opened the passenger door she squealed.
“Samaj! What in the world!”
I knew her love for Sea Turtles so I ordered the biggest plush Sea Turtle I could find and had it delivered to my dad’s house.
It was now sitting on the passenger seat along with a bouquet of flowers.
This might be my favorite arrangement yet.
The florist put together a mix of white tulips and white roses complete with lilies of the valley.
I also included a handwritten note with an apology and a small prayer.
“You didn’t think that apology back there was all you were getting right?” She turned to give me a hug.
“This is really sweet. Thank you.”
I wanted her to spend the night with me, but it was late and I knew how unwise that would be. I wanted to lead and lead her well. In the past I didn’t protect her purity like I should have and I made a promise to myself and God that I would do that this time around, so I took her straight home.
“Can I see you tomorrow? I’m going to visit my parents in the morning, but I’d like to spend the rest of the day with you if you’re free.”
“Yeah. Just call me and let me know what time I should be ready. Well... let me unblock your number first.” She said, pulling her phone out with a laugh.
“I guess I deserve that.”
The next morning, my dad and I pulled into the rehab facility just after eight.
The place was quiet in a way that felt intentional soft voices, muted colors, everything designed to slow you down whether you wanted to or not.
I took a deep breath before opening the car door, trying to steady the mix of nerves and hope sitting heavy in my chest. As anxious as I was, there was peace there too.
Since the day my mom called me last week, I’d felt this knowing in my spirit like God was whispering, This time is different. Not perfect. Not easy. But different.
“How you feeling?” my dad asked as we walked toward the entrance.
“Honestly?” I said after a beat. “I’m good.”
And for the first time in a long time, that wasn’t a lie.
We checked in and were led to a small visiting room.
Plain table. Three chairs. A window that lets in just enough sunlight to feel hopeful without being blinding.
My foot bounced under the table while we waited.
Then the door opened and my mom stepped in.
We both stood up instinctively, and for a second, I forgot how to breathe.
She looked… different. Healthier.
My mom had always been petite, but over the last few months, I’d watched her shrink into herself—sunken cheeks, tired eyes, skin dulled by sleepless nights and too much alcohol.
The woman standing in front of me now still carried the marks of battle, but they weren’t winning anymore.
Her face had color again. Her eyes were clearer. She looked rested.