Chapter 30
CHAPTER THIRTY
OLIVIA
“F uck ,” Rhett mumbles, stepping back from the force of my hit.
I match his curse with my own as pain sears through my hand. I’ve never punched anyone in my life, and I didn’t expect it to hurt so much.
Rhett’s eyes zero in on where I clutch my hand to my chest. “Shit, let me see.”
“No!” I yell, turning away.
“Peaches,” he pleads.
I turn to get another good look at him. At his stupid eyes and stupid mouth and stupid dark waves that cluster at his collar from beneath his stupid hat.
Stupid, stupid man.
Before I know it, I’m hurling myself back at him, reaching to cup my hands around his stupid face. Pressing up to my toes and kissing him. Hard.
Warm arms wrap around my middle and clutch me tight. I sink into them, letting him carry some of the weight that’s been crushing me all night. His tongue parts my mouth open as a hand winds its way up my back, tangling into the mess of my hair.
I almost lost him.
I almost lost him.
“Enough,” Kasey scolds from somewhere behind Rhett. We both turn to find him scowling. “We need to get the hell out of here.”
Rhett nods and herds me toward the open door of the truck, letting me climb into the back first before he gets in behind me. There’s hardly any space, and our knees are shoved together. When our eyes latch together beneath the dome light, I see a question waiting in his. “How did you know where I’d be?” he asks.
“I didn’t.” I shake my head. “I just knew something was wrong—I could hear it in your voice.”
He faces his brothers in front of us who are both getting settled in their own seats. “So, how then?”
Kasey starts the ignition before biting out, “I told you I knew about the game.”
“I didn’t know what else to do,” I say quietly, drawing Rhett’s attention back. “I went looking for your brothers, hoping they’d know where you were.”
“You’re a damn lucky son of a bitch,” Wells mutters from the passenger seat. He doesn’t look as angry as Kasey does, but his face is pale, and I have a feeling he might be in shock.
“What happened in there?” I ask, even though I’m terrified of the answer. I heard what I know were gunshots and saw multiple people run out of that old barn.
“Yeah, Rhett,” Kasey growls, pulling the truck onto the road that brought us here with a speed that has my stomach flipping. “Tell us what happened. And while you’re at it, maybe you could tell us what the fuck you were thinking.”
Rhett frowns, still looking at me when he answers. “There was a poker game tonight with a lot of money, and I thought it was going to be a straight game. I knew it was a risk, but I swear I had no idea what Ellis was planning?—”
“Did you know Maverick would be there?” Kasey demands.
“No.” Rhett’s jaw ticks, finally looking at his older brother. “Colt didn’t know either.”
Colt . “Who are these people?” I ask. “Ellis and Colt. They’re your friends?”
Kasey scoffs.
“They’re brothers. Their family has been friends of ours for a long time, since our dads started shit together back in the day. Including illegal card games,” Rhett says, and then he sighs. “I was pretty involved in them for a while, but I stopped a few years ago.” He glances nervously at me.
“How much?” Wells asks.
Rhett looks at him. “Half-million-dollar bets.”
“Holy shit ,” Wells shouts, and I flinch. He whips his head around to look at Rhett. “How much of that cash was legit?”
“Dunno,” Rhett answers. “Ellis was good for it. Maverick had a good amount on him but not enough, which is what got him so pissy. And the other two . . .”
“The cops, you mean?” Kasey bites out.
And my stomach plummets.
“There were cops ?” I demand, eyes fixed on Rhett.
This time it’s him who flinches. “Yeah. We didn’t know.”
I twist in my seat to look through the back window, past where Rhett’s bike is strapped in the bed, but I don’t see anyone following us.
Cops .
This is so bad.
No one says anything for a while as the pulse of roadway lights beats down around us. An uncomfortable knot forms in my throat, hot and rancid, as the reality of what Rhett’s done tonight sinks into me all over again. And those gunshots . . .
I’m not brave enough to ask who they hit.
“No one tells Brooks about any of this,” Kasey eventually says. “Or Mom or Dad. This stays here—at least until we know of any repercussions.”
He’s scared, I realize. And I get it—I am too. Even with Rhett beside me, seemingly unhurt, I’m scared to death of what all this means.
Rhett nods. “I’ll stay with Olivia tonight,” he tells his brothers.
“Oh no you won’t,” I declare.
He turns to me, having the audacity to look wounded. “I won’t?”
I shake my head. “Absolutely not. Not when I can’t trust myself not to throttle you while you sleep.” I point a finger at him. “I might be really damn happy that you’re still breathing, Rhett, but I am not happy with you . I’m fucking pissed . You don’t trust me, and it looks like you don’t even trust your family. And now I don’t trust you .”
A new tear slides down my cheek, and I wipe it away in frustration.
“Despite what you might think,” I go on, not caring that his brothers can hear every word, “I don’t care about the things you’ve done. I’ve never cared about your reputation or what anyone else thinks—I know you, and I know better. But I will not stick around just to be heartbroken by your lack of self-preservation. I can’t do it. I asked you to let me in, to let me help , and instead you chose to abandon yourself to something like this.”
He recoils like I’ve hit him again. Good , I think.
“I need time to process. You just . . . you handed yourself over to danger like it wasn’t going to matter to anyone, but it clearly mattered to your brothers, Rhett. And it damn sure mattered to me.” My heart tumbles as I turn away from him, forcing myself to breathe as the world rushes past through the dark-tinted window.
* * *
I spend the next week avoiding Rhett.
Not because I don’t want to see him—I’m bursting with the impulse to text him and see how’s doing. But I’d meant what I said about not wanting to set myself up for heartbreak if he was just going to throw himself to the wolves, and I’ve needed space to really process all that happened the night of the poker game.
Thankfully, things get busy at the café after Mom and Mark leave town on Sunday for a two-night getaway on the coast. Teresa and I take turns opening and closing the restaurant every day, doing our best to jump in and help the kitchen when we can.
Wednesday is Valentine’s Day, and Char comes in to hang out while she works, doing her best to needle Rhett-related information out of me after I’d all but told Ivan I’d think about another double date with Trent. I know my tight-lipped responses bother her, but I’m honestly not sure what to say. I can’t tell her things are done between us, because I don’t think they are. But I also can’t tell her the truth of all that’s happened over the last couple of weeks because I want to protect the Bennetts’—and Rhett’s—privacy.
So instead, I lean into another stream of updates. “I think I’m going to meet my dad,” I say, plopping into the booth opposite her and almost knocking over the foiled heart centerpiece that every table is currently dressed with. Pain sears through my hand as I brace my weight on it, and I wince. “Ow.”
Her eyes go wide. “Wait, what!” She looks at where I’m rubbing my hands together. “Are you okay?”
I nod, scooching a plate of heart-shaped sugar cookies her way that Luna dropped off from the bakery next door. I asked Mark to look at my hand yesterday after he and Mom got back, claiming I accidentally hit it against a door jam. He’s pretty sure there’s no broken bones, but it still hurts like hell. “I’ve been invited to my half-sister’s wedding, and I decided it’s worth a shot, you know?” Tucking a flyaway strand of hair behind my ears, I sneak a peek out the window where the bright sun warms the town’s streets. “I want to at least give it a chance.”
“Does your mom know?”
“Yeah. She’s going with me.” I used the email address listed on the invitation to ask Céline if I could bring Mom as a plus one, and her response had chimed in my inbox within minutes.
Of course! it read. We’re so excited that you’ve decided to come. Dad will be thrilled!
Not even an ounce of hesitation . . . at least from what I could tell.
“Oh my god , Liv. That’s huge. Are you nervous?”
“Terrified,” I admit. “But I think it helps that I don’t need him to be my dad. I don’t need this family to be my family—I’ve got all that I need here in Saddlebrook Falls. So it takes some of the pressure off, I guess? I’ll just take the opportunity to meet them and see how it goes.”
“It’s okay to want more than that,” Charlotte says quietly.
I smile. “I know. And maybe I will. But right now, this is more than enough.”
Later, I’m making a mental note to plan an afternoon with Mom so we can both find something to wear. The wedding isn’t for another three months, but it’ll be a nice opportunity to spend an afternoon with her. Maybe we can even go out to the city.
She gives me the night off work, saying it’s so I can enjoy the romantic holiday with a date, but I know she just wants to work because Mark’s working. It doesn’t take long for the lunch rush—all five tables’ worth—to disappear, so I close myself out and say goodbye to them both.
I push the front door open to head out of the café and immediately stop short when I spot Rhett. Parked along the curb in front of the building, he straddles the seat of his bike, helmet and gloves still on as he clearly waits for something.
Waiting for me? I think.
He turns to look at me, tilting his head toward the bike beneath him, and though I can’t see his eyes behind the visor, I know what he’s asking.
Frustration blooms inside me as I firmly shake my head twice, refusing to let him just show up and draw me back in. Tearing my gaze away, I start to march down the sidewalk for the walk back to my house, hoping he gets the hint and backs off. But that hope dissipates when I hear the loud roar of his engine as it bursts to life. I don’t have to look back to know he’s following me.
A thrill shoots up my spine.
Still, I ignore him. I make it all the way to the corner before the red light at the crosswalk stops me. There’s not much traffic on the road, and Rhett must be feeling particularly emboldened because before I know it, he’s angling right for me, crossing the path of oncoming traffic to sidle up in front of me and block me from crossing the street.
“Get on,” I hear him shout from beneath his helmet.
“No,” I say back, squaring my shoulders.
He shakes his head. “Get on the bike, Olivia.”
“Why?” The word squeezes out of my throat.
“Because you can’t just ignore me forever. Get on the damn bike.” His chest heaves. “Please?”
Anticipation snakes through my stomach. I let out a hard exhale, feeling my frustration dissipate through the rush of breath. “Fine,” I mumble before reaching for the second helmet and climbing on behind him.
I try not to notice how good it feels to wrap my arms around him, how relieved I am to know he’s safe. As upset as I still am, I can’t deny the way my heart draws right back into him or the way I want him in my life. That it feels good to be vulnerable with someone like this, to give parts of myself I never realized I wanted to give, even if it scares me.
I know it would be a risk to love him, to let myself truly fall.
But I think I would be willing, if he’s capable of doing the same.
He brings me down the old back road that leads to the bar, and it’s so much different with the sunlight slicing through the trees. Pulling into the empty parking lot, he steers the bike into a spot against the front curb and cuts the engine.
The silence curls around us as we dismount, leaving our helmets tucked together on the seat. I trail behind him along the sidewalk that leads to the front door and watch as he pulls out a key.
“The bar was closed that night,” I say. “When I came looking for help. No one was here.”
His eyes flash to me as he unlocks it, holding it open to let me in. “We’ve been closed since Melody died,” he says quietly.
“Oh.” I nod, shuffling through the door. My arm grazes against his hard chest and my mind narrows to the warmth that spreads from the contact.
Inside, the bar is dark. Without windows or light, it’s like walking into a dungeon. Rhett moves around me to flip various switches, and neon lights spark to life all around us. I thought he might be bringing me up to the apartment, but he heads for the bar and pulls out a stool.
“Sit,” he orders softly.
So I do. But he doesn’t take a seat next to me. Instead, he twists the stool around so I’m facing away from the bar. Toward him.
“Do you want anything to drink?” he asks. “Water? Somethin’ stronger?”
I shake my head. “Why are we here, Rhett?”
He takes a good step back before crossing his arms over his chest.
“I have a lot of things I want to say to you, Olivia, and if it’s okay with you, I’d like to just say them.”
He’s nervous. I can tell by the way his brows are pinched and shoulders are raised, a layer of determination only narrowly managing to cover a deeper-rooted fear. Hope sprouts that he might be able to ease the worry in my chest, my own fears that I can’t seem to shake. I don’t know what he could say that would help me move on from the terror he put me through, but I realize I’m willing to listen.
When I nod, he looks relieved.
“First, I want to tell you how sorry I am for what happened at the water tower the other night. I never should have been so . . . rough,” he says with an edge of regret. “Not like that. Not with you. I meant it when I said I don’t trust myself not to hurt you. I don’t think I can give you what you deserve, that I won’t hurt you in the process of trying. You deserve to be loved and cared for in a way that feels much bigger than anything I feel like I can offer, and that’s why I pulled away from you.”
He pauses, and I’m not sure if it’s to collect his thoughts or to give me a chance to say something. But I stay quiet, hoping he’ll keep going.
He does.
“Melody died ,” he forces through clenched teeth as emotion claws at him. “Melody died, and I watched my brother splinter into a thousand fucking pieces when he lost her. I watched the complete and utter destruction of the strongest man I know, and it scared the living shit out of me because I never want to feel that way. I tried to close myself off from this because I’m so fucking scared I’ll have to feel even a fraction of the way he feels right now. That losing you is going to be what breaks me apart.”
My breaths turn ragged and uneven as he steps toward me. “That's why I didn’t call you after I left the diner. Why I was trying to end things with you at the tower. Because I’m not sure I believe in forever, or that I’d even deserve it if I did. But you know what I’ve realized?”
“What?” I whisper.
“That all I was doing was forcing the pain to come early, when there’s still plenty of good to be had.” His eyes move to my bottom lip, where I’ve captured it between my teeth, and he reaches to swipe it with his thumb, pulling it free. “You came for me. You knew I needed someone, and you came for me. I don’t know what the hell you see in me beyond a bad attitude and a black fucking heart, but being seen by you is something I don’t want to lose yet.
“I don’t want to fight this. This isn’t practice anymore, peaches. Nothing about the way I feel for you is pretend. And I’m scared of those feelings, but I’ve realized I don’t have a choice anymore because my heart’s already yours. And I don’t want to live in a world where you’re not mine.”
He cups my face with his warm hand. My eyes burn with emotion as I take in the ghost of a sad smile on his lips.
“I’m scared too,” I admit. “I’m scared of how you see yourself. Your heart isn’t black, Rhett. It’s warm and tender and safe. You’ve shown me what it is to be cared for in ways I wasn’t sure existed. You’re important to me. And that matters . . . you matter.” I let my gaze wash over his face, taking in all the hard lines of his jaw and the curl of his hair. “Stop believing that this is only going to end. I mean—it might. It’s a risk to love.” I think of my mother and all that she endured. How she was still able to open her heart again because in the end her love for Mark conquered those doubts. “It’s a risk to try. But I want to take that risk with you. I want you to believe we can do this.”
His thumbs trails softly across my cheek and he nods. “I can’t promise I won’t make mistakes, but I’m going to be so fucking careful with you, Olivia.”
“You’re still missing the point.” I shake my head. “I don’t need you to be careful with me. I need you to be careful with yourself . I need you to care about yourself, to believe that you can be loved without the need to sacrifice so much. You don’t need to be worthy, Rhett. I see you just the way you are, and it’s more than enough.” Pressure builds in the corners of my eyes as new tears threaten, but I try like hell to look unaffected. “And for the record, I’ve never minded you being a little rough with me. I thought you knew that.”
The corner of his mouth curves, a whisper of his devilish smirk. “I do know.”
“So,” I continue, “I think maybe you can lighten up and take off the kid gloves.”
He considers, his eyes dancing circles along my face. “All right.” He stands taller, pulling his hand back. “I’ll give it to you straight.”
I brace myself for whatever he’s about to throw at me and nod.
“At that poker game, four people were killed. One of them was a known criminal we’ve run into before. Another one a part of his gang. And the other two were cops.” I knew about the cops already, but dammit if the words didn’t sink fear into me all over again. “We didn’t know they were undercover. Ellis thought they were random cowboys from Cheyenne—the fucking idiot. Maverick killed both of the cops after one of them killed his guy. Kasey . . . Kasey shot Maverick to protect the rest of us.”
“Oh my god.” Kasey killed someone?
Rhett’s eyes harden. “Yeah. It’s fucked. But so far, Ellis says things have been quiet. One of Maverick’s guys got out, but if he’s smart, he’s not going to say anything. I don’t doubt more cops are going to go knocking on Ellis’s door, but he’s been way too loose with his fucking stunts lately, and he’s already given his word he’ll take the fall.”
“Do you think he’ll do it?” I ask.
Rhett nods. “His brother and sister were there. He’s a prick, but he won’t jeopardize them.”
“What about the money?”
Rhett’s mouth tugs. “Ellis dropped off our cuts yesterday. It’s . . . it’s a lot of cash. Enough to help.”
I frown. “What do you need it for? You said for a funeral . . . but also a lawyer? You said your uncle is threatening the ranch?” Kasey hadn’t explained further in the truck, telling Wells they’d talk about it later.
“Yeah. He wants the ranch, and he’s not above playing dirty to get it.” He blows out a harsh breath. “Apparently, in order for the ranch to transition, its successor needs to be married—some stupid rule in all the fine print. Brooks was always going to be the one who gets the ranch, but . . .”
My chest squeezes. “Melody.”
He nods. “My uncle knows my dad’s in a wheelchair and not fit to run things anymore, but he’s never had much of a fight to the land with Brooks ready to take things over. Unfortunately, Brooks was never in a hurry to officially take things over, and now my uncle thinks he can skirt his way in. We need the money for a good lawyer, someone who can help us shut him down. Maybe even take out that stupid rule that says one of us needs to be married to inherit what’s always been ours.”
I shake my head. “That’s . . . a lot, Rhett.”
Something cracks in his expression. “Yeah.”
“ Way too much for you to have ever thought you should handle it alone,” I add.
He sighs. “I just didn’t want you to get caught up in any of it. And I didn’t want my brothers to be disappointed or worried.”
I tsk. “How’d that turn out?”
He rolls his eyes.
“Rhett,” I say, stepping down from the stool and toward him, reaching my hands out to take his. “Promise me. Never again.”
He leans down low, resting his forehead on the top of mine. “Never,” he whispers.
“ This is what it takes,” I tell him. “Communication. Good and bad. No kid gloves, no secrets.”
He nods. “I promise.” He presses a kiss to my temple. Pulls me in close. “I have a lot of making up to do.”
I smile. “That sounds fun.”
He steels himself, looking down at me with a reverence that makes me feel raw. “I’ve never begged for anything in my life, Olivia, but I’m begging for you. It’s scary for me to admit I have so much hope after everything. But I feel it with you—you make me hope with my whole fucking chest.”
I smile, leaning up into his mouth. “If you ever put yourself in danger like that again, I’m going to make you hurt for it, Rhett. Don’t steal my heart just to break it.”
He rumbles in agreement with a quiet “Yes ma’am,” and a steep longing pierces into me as he finally captures my mouth with his.