Chapter 19 #2
His mother gave him one of her looks. This one called him a fool who should know better. “As much as I love you, Nicky, you know better than to think a girl like Abigail would deem you and Marstede good enough. Her interest in marrying you took me by surprise.”
“Then why did you inv—” he cut himself off.
He should have realized it immediately. “She’s here to make the others more palatable.
You invited Jane to give her time away from her family in an environment where she can explore her magic.
You didn’t invite Sadie at all. Tell me, which woman was I supposed to choose, since you seem to have it all worked out already?
If it was Helen, I’m sorry to inform you that she is only here because it is expected of her and she has no desire to marry me whatsoever. ”
“How do you know that?”
His mother didn’t sound surprised. She’d probably figured it out within the first hour of Helen’s arrival. “She asked Sadie to tell me. Or more likely, she confided in Sadie, who offered to tell me.”
The door creaked open, and Nicholas turned, hoping it was a servant rather than a guest. The head of honey-brown hair poking through the gap belonged to a guest, but not one he wanted to see less of. He surged to his feet.
“Madeleine, I wanted to talk to you about something,” Sadie said to his mother, ignoring him completely.
“Come in and sit. You are supposed to be resting, dear.”
“I feel much better.”
“Still, you should sit, if only to put my son at ease. He’ll be hovering, afraid you’ll faint otherwise.”
Sadie finally looked at him, though she addressed his mother. “Putting Nicholas at ease is not a priority for me.” She turned away once more. “And he knows I’m not about to faint.”
“Well then, sit to put me at ease. You do look much better, but you had me worried before.”
Sadie sat down next to his mother, and Nicholas knew he should make his excuses and leave them to their conversation. Instead, he reclaimed his seat across from them. “What brought you downstairs when you were supposed to be resting, Sadie?”
Her jaw clenched, and then she very deliberately ignored him. “Madeleine, I couldn’t rest because I was thinking about something that I fear needs to be addressed sooner rather than later.”
“And what is that, dear?”
“Lenora. The incident with the bat terrified her, and then Abigail’s talk of curses and demons made it worse.
She doesn’t feel safe in Marstede, and I don’t think any number of reassurances can make her feel safe.
Pippa mentioned that her maid was talking about sending a note home to ask for their carriage to come pick her up early.
I was wondering if you could offer her your own carriage and save her family the trip. ”
Nicholas kept his lips locked. This was not a conversation for him to jump into with his enthusiasm for sending a guest home.
He probably should have left and let Sadie broach the topic with his mother alone.
But he hadn’t known what she was going to talk about, and honestly, had rather expected her to kick him out of the room when he didn’t take the hint and leave on his own.
“I suspect you are right,” his mother told Sadie. “I’ll offer the carriage to Lenora. Best if I do so now, that way we can make all the arrangements as soon as possible.”
She patted Sadie on the hand and rose. Nicholas looked up as his mother walked past and met her eyes. “Let me know if I need to write a letter to her father.”
She squeezed his shoulder. “I’ll write to her mother. I think that will go over better, but thank you, Nicky.”
A few moments later, he and Sadie were alone in the parlor. At which point, he realized his mother had conveniently escaped their earlier conversation. “Damn it.”
Sadie raised a brow. “I thought you’d celebrate having one fewer guest at Marstede.”
“Not that. Mother never answered my question about who she intended for me to marry.”
Sadie’s brow furrowed. “Isn’t the entire month meant to help you pick a bride?”
“This is Lady Madeleine Huxley we are talking about. She knew exactly who she intended me to pick before she sent the first invitation.” Except, she didn’t seem to mind that Nicholas only had eyes for Sadie, who had never been intended to be a guest.
Sadie nodded. “Not Lenora or Abigail. The other three, however, I could all see as possibilities.”
“What about yourself?”
She laughed. “I am not meant to win the prize.”
Nicholas couldn’t help it. He smirked. “You consider me a prize, then?”
She shook her head, still laughing. “The title, Nicky. You must know the prize is your title.”
He did know. He also didn’t have to ask to know that Sadie didn’t care about his title. “I’m never going to marry someone who only wants my title.”
That had been his vague plan, originally. When the time came, he’d pick a bride who’d only say yes because of his title and would hopefully cause as little disruption to his life as possible. But he knew that would never satisfy him now.
In fact, he strongly suspected only one person would satisfy him now.
He stood up and prowled across the space between them, causing Sadie to watch him with wide eyes. He stopped directly in front of her and leaned down, placing a hand on the back of the settee beside her and lowering his lips to her ear.
She sucked in an audible breath.
“Too bad for them; you are the only one who could win the prize. I’ve made up my mind, Sadie. Now you have to make up yours.”
“Nick—” She gulped.
He wasn’t sure if she had meant to shorten his name or if her voice had failed her partway through, and he didn’t really care. Both options appealed. He didn’t pull back, but he did slap a ward over the parlor door, just in case. “Yes, Sadie?”
“You … I … we …”
He chuckled. He rather liked making her speechless. “Take your time. I’m not going anywhere.”
More importantly, she wasn’t going anywhere. Nicholas was eighty percent certain she lived in Lamsdel. Even if she didn’t trust him enough to share her secrets by the end of the month, he’d still have the opportunity to convince her.
She turned her head, and now their lips were only a shared breath apart. He hadn’t intended to kiss her when he came over—he wanted her trust more than anything—but he couldn’t resist the temptation. He cradled the back of her head and took her mouth.
She moaned and gripped his shoulders. The kiss started exactly where their first by the spring had left off, with no tentativeness, no stumbling.
Nicholas had to fight not to let his hands wander as they had by the spring.
If he hadn’t stopped then … but he had, and now he couldn’t give into the desire demanding more than a simple taste of Sadie.
Not now, when he knew he wanted more than the physical.
But he also couldn’t bring himself to pull back, much as he knew he should.
It was Sadie who wrenched herself away this time, her breathing harsh. “Nicholas—”
“Nick,” he corrected her, wanting that intimacy, even though he wouldn’t ask for any others until she trusted him.
“Nicholas,” she said deliberately, erecting a barrier between them no less strong than his wards. “I’m not going to spill my secrets over pillow talk.”
“That’s fine, because there will be no beds involved until you’ve already shared.”
???
Sadie gaped at Nicholas. “Wait, a week ago we couldn’t kiss because I’d assume it meant more than it did, and now you are saying you want it to mean more?”
When he had said he’d made up his mind, she had assumed he was talking about indulging in a fling. Not … whatever this was.
Nicholas rose to his full height, towering over her as she sat on the settee, and crossed his arms. “It already means more, or will you deny that?”
“It shouldn’t,” she whispered. “We both know why this can’t work. You want more than I can give.”
“And I’ll take nothing until you are ready to share. Whatever you’re hiding about your magic, Sadie, it won’t change how I feel about you. If you tell me, I can share the burden with you.” He lowered his arms, his hazel eyes going soft. “I know you don’t believe that yet, but it’s true.”
Sadie shook her head.
Nicholas reached out and cupped her cheek. “Take the time you need. I’m not going anywhere.” He dropped his hand. “But I will let you ponder this in private for now.”
He turned and made his way to the door, a shimmering ward she hadn’t even noticed before fading away as he approached. He turned and gave her one last lingering look before he stepped out of the room and left her to her solitary thoughts.
Thoughts that were beginning to resemble hopes a bit too much. Hopes always shattered; Sadie knew that all too well. She didn’t want to be left picking up the pieces yet again.
Unfortunately, all her choices would lead to shards of pain now.
She could take the risk of confiding in Nicholas and lose her haven in Lamsdel if—no, when—everything fell apart.
Or she could guard her secrets and spend the rest of her life wondering what could have been between them if she weren’t a telepath.
She knew which path she’d choose, but that didn’t mean they didn’t both hurt.