28
Penny
“What do you mean no?” I ask Beckett as he wipes the kitchen counter over with a damp cloth.
“I mean, no. You’re not moving back to Evie’s place. You just said your lease isn’t being renewed, so why bother?”
I stare at him, completely taken aback by his response. “You mean to mine and Evie’s place?”
“I meant what I said.” The bastard doesn’t even bother looking at me, he just continues tidying up the mess I made half an hour ago while making myself a bacon and egg sandwich.
And here I thought we could have an adult conversation about this. I mean, it did take me a good three days to bring this up with him, but that’s his own fault. The man fucking dotes on me. He brings me my coffee in the mornings, in bed, he rubs my feet every night, brushes my hair for me when I get out of the shower…
I don’t want to leave. I’ve thought about it, long and hard, and I honestly don’t want to be away from him, but I also can’t stay.
We’re not together, but we act like we are, especially when we’re alone, and I know where that leads…
“You can’t just say no ,” I snap.
“Just did.”
“Beckett!”
“Penny,” he retorts, finally dropping the cloth onto the counter, and turning to look at me with crossed arms and a stern expression. “Why leave? I’ve already moved all your stuff in. Look around, it’s everywhere.”
I don’t bother, because for the past week, I’ve noticed more and more of my trinkets and photos appearing in random spots around the house.
“So what? This isn’t my place, it’s yours. I stayed here because I was hurt. You all wanted me to be supervised to make sure that I rested, and look,” I wave my hands up and down, gesturing to my now healed body, “I’m fine.”
He huffs. “Hardly. I have to force you to rest. Every single day I have to fight you to come home after spending over three hours on your feet, trying to keep the café stocked, and you’ve yet to even glance at a resume for your replacement.”
“Because I don’t want to be replaced!” The words rush out of my mouth, his little dig rubbing me the wrong way. “I don’t need a replacement, because I’m fine!”
“No. You’re pregnant, injured, and your blood pressure is too damn high!”
“You say that as if pregnant women shouldn’t work! It’s my business. I’m not going to let it fall apart because-”
“It will not fall apart, and you’re not going to be replaced. It’s temporary , Penny, and we both know that. You’re being stubborn for no damn reason.”
I groan and run my hands through my hair, pushing it back from my face. “Why are we even talking about this? My point is, this isn’t my house, and I’d like to-”
“I’ll put your name on the deed.”
My brain short circuits for a moment, trying to piece together the words he just said in a way that makes sense. “You’ll what?”
He shrugs, as if doing so would mean nothing. “I’ll put your name on the deed, then it’ll be our place, not mine. Problem solved.” With a nod, he grabs the cloth from beside him and begins cleaning again. “Now, go and take a nap. We’ve got karaoke at the pub tonight, and you’ll never make it through without one.”
“What do you mean, ‘you’ll put my name on the deed’?” I ask, ignoring the rest of his sentence. “Who just says that?”
“You said this isn’t your house. That, it not being your house, is an issue. So, I made it a non-issue.” I don’t miss the sly grin on his face, even though he turns his head to the side to try to hide and it from me.
“You can’t just do that.”
“Why not? It’s my house. I can do what I like with it.”
“You’re impossible, and that doesn’t even sound legal!” I stomp my foot, because I feel like I’m talking to a brick wall right now. “And that’s not even the only issue! I want to nest. I want my own space. I want to set up my baby’s nursery, and, I don’t know, rearrange the kitchen like women do in the movies-”
“You can do that here-”
“I’m not finished! My relationship with Evie will change if I stay here, and I’m not ready for that. I’ve gone from seeing her every day, to whenever she can find the time to stop over here, or when our paths cross at the café before I’m forced to come back here and lay on the couch like some kind of invalid. I miss her. I miss having her around. Don’t you get that?”
Beckett pauses, cloth in hand, and stares at an empty spot on the counter before snapping back into action and pulling his phone from the pocket of his dark grey sweatpants. I watch, unsure what the hell he’s doing as he unlocks the device, taps the screen five times and then raises it to his ear.
“Brother,” he says into the phone. “You good?” He waits for a response and then nods, still avoiding my eyes. “So, Wednesdays you take Em for the afternoon, yeah? Yeah, perfect. So, Penny’s missing time with the girls. I figured me you and Em could hang at your place on Wednesday nights, then Molly and Evie can come here and spend some time with her, yeah? Make it a weekly thing. They can have dinner, watch a movie. Hell, they can even sleep here.” He nods again as I stand here, jaw practically on the floor. “Perfect. Yep. Nah, I’ll message Evie. Thanks. Yep. See you in the morning.”
He hangs up, taps out a message on his phone and hits send before looking up at me with a victorious smile spread across his stupidly handsome face. “Problem solved.”
This motherfucker…
“I’m a grown woman! You can’t just-”
His phone dings in his hand, interrupting my sentence. “Evie’s in. Wednesday nights. That’s your girls’ nights. I’ll make myself scarce, and you can have the house to yourselves.”
“Beckett!” I shriek, not because I don’t want a weekly girl’s night. That honestly sounds amazing, but because he’s not listening!
Immediately, he drops the cloth back down and crosses the room to stand in front of me. In one quick move, he’s got his hand wrapped around the back of my neck and his lips pressed to my forehead. “I hear you, Love,” he whispers. “I’m listening, I just…Just tell me what you want from me.” He leans back, just enough to be able to look me in the eye as he says, “You want me to beg? Fine. I’ll beg.” The man drops to his knees on the floor in front of me, taking my stomach with him. “Don’t fucking leave me. Please. I’ll do whatever you want. I’ll give you whatever you want. Just don’t leave. Not again.”
“Beck-”
“No. I love you, Penny. God, I love you. And I’m so fucking sorry. For everything. For that night. For not fighting harder for you. For not being who you needed me to be, then. But I am now. I’m that guy. Your guy. You want to nest? You want to potter around and rearrange everything in the house? Do it here . You want to set up the baby’s nursery, paint the walls, fucking rip the walls out for all I care . Do it here. This place, it’s yours, and I promise, if there comes a time when you want me gone, I’ll go. I’ll leave . I’ll find somewhere else to live, and I’ll be okay knowing you and our son are here. At home .”
I can see the desperation in his eyes, as if it’s a reflection of the internal battle going on inside myself.
It’s not like I don’t want all of that.
It’s not like I don’t want to just forget everything, forgive him, and move on.
God, I want to.
But how do I do that?
Can I do that?
It’s going to be one hell of a lonely life, if you push away every person that makes a mistake.
Why the words run through my head, I don’t know, but they make me realise that if I leave now, I’ll always ask myself, ‘what if?’
So, instead of saying no, I whisper, “Okay. We’ll stay…”
I mean, worst case, I’ll take his house and burn all his shit.
Fuck around and find out, Beckett.