Raven Chapter 11 Sensations and Symbols 121 #2
“Now that your… immediate needs are met,” he says, the phrase dripping with disdain for the inconvenient delay, “explain.”
"Well…" I trail off, scrambling for the right words before deciding I'm in too deep. Might as well rip the bandage off. "I've kind of been stalking you guys for the past five years."
Mr. Upright Morality starts pacing like a caged tiger at the admission. I watch him, a knot tightening in my stomach. This is either going to be fun, or it's going to hurt like a bitch. Possibly a little of both.
"You've been stalking us—" Forrest begins, his voice tight.
"More like observing, honestly," I cut in.
He gives me a glare that sends a definite thrill down my spine. Oh, I like that feeling.
"You've been observing us. For five years." He corrects, his words clipped.
I just grin. "Yep."
He stops dead. "That's a violation."
I just blink. "Of what? The ghost code of conduct? I can say, with authority, that it does not exist."
Kieran snorts into a drink he must have grabbed while I was in nirvana. Em's pencil pauses mid-stroke. Anik leans back, crossing his arms, looking deeply entertained. Dre just looks panicked.
Forrest's eye twitches. "Of privacy. Of trust."
Okay, well, color me confused . I tilt my head. "I was a ghost, Ro-ro. It's not like I could have knocked."
Kieran sets his drink down and bites his fist to stifle a laugh. Anik's twitch turns into a smirk.
I know I'm getting to him when he sputters, "You—you know things."
Trying to stay deadpan, I reply, "Astounding deduction."
Forrest is definitely a shade redder. "This isn't a joke."
I sigh, the humor fading. "Look, it's not like I chose to be a ghost-thing. Or at least, I don't think I did. I just… existed. Then I didn't want to be alone, and you guys showed up. So I followed along and stayed."
"So you watched us. Without consent," he confirms, clinging to his outrage.
I raise a brow. "You want me to apologize for being dead near you?"
Kieran leans over to Dre, whispering, "Och, she's good at this."
Forrest seems to be unraveling, and an evil part of me is cackling gleefully. “You know personal details. Private moments. Intimate ones.”
I can’t help but grin wickedly. “Oh, you mean how you—”
“Don’t you dare,” he says, genuine panic flashing in his eyes.
Too late.
“—cry during Pride and Prejudice .”
“Yer jokin'!” Kieran is absolutely delighted.
I have waited five long, lonely years to push this man’s buttons, and I am enjoying it way too much.
Dre snickers. “The 2005 version or the 1995 miniseries?”
“That’s not the point,” Forrest says, shooting a betrayed glance at the duo.
I just shrug. “You brought it up.”
He assumes the classic position, pinching the bridge of his nose. “This is insane. You can’t just infiltrate our lives and drop bombs like this!”
I tilt my head. “You’d rather I lied?”
He falters. “That’s not—”
Anik finally speaks, amusement coloring his words. “She’s got you there, preacher.”
Forrest glares at him, then back at me. “You don’t even care.”
My humor vanishes, my smile fading. “I care,” I say, my voice quiet but clear. The room stills. “I cared enough to die for you before I even had a body.”
I continue, a little louder now, the words hanging in the sudden silence. “I didn’t ask for this. But if I had to be stuck somewhere… I’m glad it was with you guys.”
“That’s not an excuse,” he replies stiffly, the anger being pushed into his usual formality.
I just roll my eyes, trying to lighten the mood he’s determined to keep heavy. “It was a compliment . Take the win, Ro-ro.”
He opens his mouth, then shuts it, at a total loss. Then he stands up straight, and I know I’ve probably just fucked up. The air chills.
His voice is low, dangerously controlled. “You don’t get to joke about this.”
I frown, genuinely confused by the misread. “I wasn’t—”
“You’ve been a liability since the moment you appeared. You took a hit meant for us, which was reckless.” His hand knifes through his hair. “You don’t know anything about surviving in this world.”
I flinch. His words shouldn’t hurt this much, but they do. Even if he is right.
“Enough.” Anik growls—literally growls—and another little shiver works its way down my spine.
Forrest ignores him. “If you are going to be here, you will learn. Properly.” I watch as he takes his anger and forges it into discipline. “Starting tomorrow, assuming you clear Leandre’s check-up, you will be training with us.”
I nod numbly as he finally sits. The fight drains out of me, leaving a hollow ache. I twist the too-long sleeves of Dre’s sweater, the soft fabric a poor shield against his words.
They don’t know me . The truth of it settles like a stone in my gut.
For five years, they’ve been my entire world, but to them, I’m just a stranger who crashed into their lives. I need to remember this isn’t the reunion I dreamed of; it’s a negotiation, and I’m starting from less than zero.
“Now,” Forrest says, his problem-solving voice taking center stage. “What are you, and where did you come from, exactly?”
I sigh, hoping for the best but expecting the worst. And then I just..
. start. I tell them about the gray, shapeless nothing of my beginning—waking up in the human realm with no clue what I was.
About stumbling into the supernatural world hidden inside it.
And finally, about finding them. About being a lonely, anchorless ghost who latched onto the first warmth she'd felt in an eternity and simply refused to let go.
“How much of our lives did you spy on?” he asks, an accusatory edge to his voice.
"I mainly stayed around the apartment unless you guys went and did something dangerous—then I came along.
Sometimes I'd go with some of you to work for a change of scenery.
" I hold my hands up defensively. "But I never spied on your intimate relationships.
I stayed out of your bathrooms and bedrooms unless I knew you were fully dressed.
I didn't want to be a total creep, just in case I became corporeal one day. You would never trust me if I’d broken boundaries like that. "
“You went with us on missions?” Anik asks, a new note of interest in his voice.
"Yeah. I couldn't do much, but occasionally I was able to help."
"How?" Emerson leans forward, his curiosity piqued.
"Well, remember a little over a year ago when you raided that warehouse to destroy a batch of drugs that were killing supernaturals?" They all nod. "And remember when you found that trap that would have killed whoever triggered it?"
Kieran's eyes go wide. "That wee pebble that went flyin’ across the hallway?" He looks straight at me, a dawning realization on his face. "That was you?"
A relieved laugh escapes me. "Yeah. I was freaking out. I saw it and couldn't do anything to warn you, but eventually my anger grew enough that I kicked a stone while I was trying to kick the device. It all worked out in the end."
"So you have no idea who or what you are?" Leandre asks, a note of unexpected sadness in his voice. "Do you even have a name?"
I just nod, smiling. "You guys can call me Raven."
"Why that name?" Em asks, finally pausing his manic scribbling.
"Two of my best friends are ravens. It seemed like a good fit," I tell him simply.
"Why is it you swear like a witch?" Em continues, his head tilting.
"I do what?"
"You use the name of Nyx when you swear," Dre clarifies helpfully. "That's generally something only witches do. Granted, most would never be as irreverent as you are about it." None of them seem fazed, so I don't let the oddity bother me.
I shrug. "It's just something I've always done. Never really thought about it, but I did it even when I followed humans around."
"Perhaps you are a witch, then," Em says,latching onto the tiny clue. "Do you have any magic?"
I just look at him blankly. "Em. I've only had a corporeal body for a few hours. I'm not even confident I can walk in a straight line."
A snort comes from both Kieran and Leandre. The room falls silent as they all digest what I’ve told them. A lot of silent eye communication passes between them before Forrest stands.
“It’s late. We all need to eat and get some rest. We’ll tackle this issue again in the morning.” He pauses, and a collective groan rises from everyone except Em. “Plus, everyone has reports to file.”
It stings, just a little, that he referred to me and my situation as an issue. But I try not to let it fester. I don’t want to be a problem for them—well, not any more than I already am—so I decide to let it slide.
“Do I have to fill out a report?” I ask.
Forrest shakes his head. “No. Until we understand the reason behind… well, your existence, this stays between us.”
Dre approaches me, his expression kind. “I haven’t had time to clear out the bedroom Miriam used. You can stay there tonight.”
I nod and follow behind him, my mind still buzzing with new sensations. That brownie was life-changing, but I don’t know if I can mark chocolate off my to-do list completely. I think I need pure, unadulterated chocolate to confidently do that.
“I need a chocolate bar,” I say abruptly.
Dre almost stumbles. Something flashes in his eyes that looks a lot like hurt, and I can’t have that.
“The brownie was…” I can’t help but moan a little at the memory, “so freaking good. Thank you for that. The thing is, I have this list, and I want to cross chocolate off of it. I don’t feel I can do that unless I’ve had straight chocolate. You know?”
Kieran appears as if from nowhere, giving me a wicked grin. “I’ll get some for ye, Wisp. Dinnae worry.”
Dre clears his throat, reasserting a semblance of order. “Well, now that’s settled. There’s a half-bath for guests down the hall. It doesn’t have a shower, so if you’d like one tonight, you’ll have to use one of ours.”
Kieran, who definitely isn’t a shifter, somehow manages to sound like he’s purring as he suggests, “You’re welcome to use my shower, wisp.”