5. I Thought You Were in London
I THOUGHT YOU WERE IN LONDON
ANNELISA
After spending all day Saturday with my stomach in knots, I spend twenty minutes sitting in the car outside the address Morgan had given me.
People I don’t know have been wandering inside periodically while I’ve been trying to work up the courage to go inside.
I’ve turned the car on twice, both times intent on just driving away. But something stops me.
Finally, I put my big girl panties on and get out of the car. Reaching inside, I pull out the gift bag with the bottle of champagne I bought on my way, remembering Morgan’s love of the bubbly drink. I hesitate for another moment, biting my lip.
Is this gift too impersonal? She was my best friend for over twenty years, would it be worse if I showed up empty-handed or with a bottle of champers?
Realising it’s too late now, I square my shoulders and leave the safety of my car behind.
When I reach the front door, I find it partially open.
Unsure whether anyone will hear me knock, I push the door open further and step inside, noticing the photos on the wall in the little entrance foyer.
Morgan and Chris’s wedding photos dominate the space, and I struggle to keep my composure, my throat tightening when I see my face staring back at me.
I remember that day with mixed emotions.
My smile in each picture is so at odds with how I was really feeling that day.
It was a day so full of love, but I was dealing with my own problems at the time and had been going through the motions while we celebrated their relationship.
The first of our friendship group to get married, it’s the only wedding I’ve attended, as the others all began pairing up after I left.
I can see their wedding photos mixed in with the other family photos on the wall.
A stark reminder of everything I’d missed when I walked away.
Laughter from the next room breaks me free of my guilt-ridden musings, and I reluctantly head in that direction. The nerves I’ve been dealing with for the last day and a half are threatening to overcome me, and I wonder if I’m about to throw up.
What am I doing here? I don’t belong here anymore.
As I’m seriously considering turning and running the opposite way, someone walks up behind me and clears their throat.
“Um, hi?”
I freeze, recognising that voice.
Turning slowly, I come face to face with Jake Boyd, one of my oldest friends, and, from what I’ve been told, now Morgan’s brother-in-law.
“Jesus… Annelisa?” He steps back slightly, staring at me, the shock etched into his features while his eyes run over my face.
“Hey, Jake,” I say, giving him a weak smile.
“What… What are you doing here?” he asks, stumbling over his words.
“Morgan invited me.” I hold up the gift bag.
“I thought you were in London?”
I can tell he’s struggling to wrap his head around my presence.
Jake and I were close once, and we’ve known each other since we were all in nappies.
But he was one of the people I left behind when I ran away.
And I’m sure he has a thousand more questions right now.
It’s obvious that Morgan hadn’t told him I was coming, which makes me wonder if she told anyone else. I don’t know if that’s better or worse.
“I’ve been staying with Mum for the last month.”
Jake’s eyes widen further. “A month? But Tara…”
“I asked Tara not to tell anyone.”
“Jake? Who are you talking to?” Chris appears behind him with a baby on his hip, stopping short in the doorway when his gaze meets mine over Jake’s shoulder. “Holy shit.”
I give him a small wave, swallowing hard.
“Why’s everyone crowded in the doorway?” Morgan is a step behind Chris, and is the first person to smile at me. “Hey! You came!”
“Yep…” I reply, although I am seriously reconsidering my choices right now.
“Morgan?” Chris turns to look at his wife, his expression unreadable.
She grins at him. “So, guess who I found running along the side of the road yesterday?” She seems rather proud of her little subterfuge.
She was always a lover of drama, but I, personally, could have done without it in this instance.
“Running? Was someone chasing you?” Jake asks, raising an eyebrow.
I let out a breath. “Yep, I run now. It’s a thing.”
“Well come on, let’s get you a drink.” Morgan reaches around the guys and pulls me along behind her.
I don’t miss the glances that Chris and Jake exchange, and I wonder how long it’s going to be before someone confronts me about the events of seven years ago.
Morgan drags me into the lounge room, and the conversation grinds to a halt.
While there are a few people here that I don’t recognise, there are still some familiar faces.
Including Morgan’s younger sister, Bri, who is currently gaping at me from where she’s sitting on the couch, a tiny boy who is the spitting image of Jake and looks to be about two sitting on her lap.
I’ve never been the biggest fan of being the centre of attention, and I’m silently cursing Morgan for the position she’s put me in. But I know it’s what I deserve. Tara has reminded me so many times how much I hurt everyone when I just up and left, so I need to endure this.
“So, for the sake of everyone here, yes, this is Annelisa. Yes, she’s here. Now go about your business,” Morgan says, waving her hands.
Slowly, conversations begin again, although Bri still remains frozen in place while she stares at me. I knew my reappearance would have a profound effect on the immediate group. And this exchange is exactly why I’d begged Tara to keep my return to herself.
I allow Morgan to lead me to the couch, urging me to take a seat next to Bri and sitting down on my other side.
“Um… hi,” Bri says, her tone hesitant.
“Hey,” I reply, not sure what else to say.
“I’m really glad you came,” Morgan says.
I smile, wishing I shared that sentiment. The reality of my situation is setting in, and now I just want to return to Mum’s apartment and hide away once again.
Silently telling myself I need to give it at least an hour before I make a run for it, I glance around at the rest of the people in the room. A few of them are looking my way, but for the most part, those outside of our friendship circle don’t appear to be that weirded out by my presence.
“Morgan. Can I have a word?” Chris asks from the doorway.
He’s watching me closely, and I suspect he wants to discuss my sudden reappearance with his wife. Jake appears to be torn as to what to do as well, but he comes to sit beside Bri as Morgan follows Chris out of the room .
“So, who’s this little guy?” I ask, gesturing towards the toddler in Bri’s lap, needing to break some of the tension.
I’ve learned that people love to talk about their children, and I just need the focus off me.
“This is Ashton,” Bri says with a smile as she looks down at her son.
“And how old are you, Ashton?” I ask, as the little boy grabs a hold of my finger.
“Can you say ‘I’m two,’ Ash?” Jake prompts, and Ashton peers up at him before looking back at me.
“I’m two,” he tells me proudly, and I grin.
“Such a big boy.”
He smiles back at me, surprising us all when he reaches out to me, his little hands grabbing at the air like he wants me to hold him. I look at Bri, who nods, and I lift Ashton onto my lap.
“He probably thinks you’re Tara,” she says.
I nod. It wouldn’t be the first time someone has confused us.
“It still blows my mind that you all have kids now,” I remark, while bouncing my knee for the giggling toddler.
“Yeah… I guess a lot can happen in seven years,” Jake says slowly.
I nod. “I guess it can.” He’s not wrong, and there’s no point trying to deny it.
I can tell they both want to ask me questions, but I’m relieved when they remain quiet, simply exchanging a glance.
Only fifty-five minutes left…
Morgan eventually returns, her youngest daughter now resting her head on her shoulder as she cuddles into her. She looks a little tense, and I hope that my presence hasn’t caused an argument between her and Chris.
“I won’t stick around long. I don’t want to cause any issues,” I say quietly, as I hand a fussing Ashton back to Bri.
Morgan gives me a sad smile. “I get it. Chris will be fine. He was just annoyed with me for not giving him any warning, but I told him to deal with it. I’m glad you came.”
“You guys aren’t fighting, are you?”
She shakes her head. “I don’t think so, but Caidin started screaming just as we started talking, so she’s on my side if we are.” She grins down at the baby, who buries her head shyly into her neck while she peeks at me from behind Morgan’s hair.
A little blonde girl comes tearing into the room, making a beeline straight for Morgan. I can tell straight away that this must be Lucy, her eldest. I know that she’s only a few months older than Brandie, and is the eldest of the offspring in the group.
“Lucy. This is your Aunty Annelisa,” Morgan says, nodding her head towards her tiny clone.
Lucy looks up at me with wide, blue eyes. She looks like a little doll, with perfect little blonde ringlets framing her heart shaped face.
“Hi. I know you.”
I glance at Morgan before returning my gaze to Lucy’s. “No honey, you mean my sister, Aunty Tara.”
Lucy shakes her head. “No. I’ve seen you in photos.”
“Oh,” I reply, figuring she means the wedding photos that are dotted around the house.
“Yeah. At Uncle Will’s.”
My throat tightens, and I swallow hard.
Will still has photos of me in his house?
Surely not? The little girl must be thinking of the wedding photos on her own wall.
Morgan hands Caidin to Jake and sweeps Lucy into her lap. “What have you been up to, little miss?” she asks, giving me a quick apologetic look before focusing on her little clone.
I miss whatever she says next however, as a familiar voice calls out “hello” from the front entrance, and time freezes.
It hasn’t changed at all - a deep tone that’s a little rough around the edges that, even now, causes a flurry of desire in my belly.
I’d know that voice anywhere. A voice that was once more familiar to me than my own.
I stare at Morgan in panic.
While I’m trying to work out how I can make it out of here undetected, a tall man with brown hair wanders into the room.
His curls are just as unruly as ever, and they frame his perfect, heartbreakingly handsome face.
He’s filled out a little since I last saw him, and I can see the outline of his muscles through the long-sleeved black shirt he’s wearing.
His dark jeans hang from his hips, and it shouldn’t surprise me that his presence has set my heart racing, even after all these years.
Bri and Morgan both tense beside me, and Jake clears his throat as Chris appears behind the newcomer, his eyes wide.
“Will,” I whisper, feeling like the walls are closing in on me.
All conversation in the room has ceased once again, and Will looks around, confusion written all over his face.
His gaze flits over me for a moment, falling on Morgan beside me.
But then those beautiful blue eyes move back to meet mine, and I can tell the second he registers my presence when he draws in a sharp breath, and a name I’ve not heard in seven years escapes his lips.
“Annie?”
Well. Fuck.