Chapter Twenty-Seven
Melonie
L inc quietly closes the door of my apartment behind him. I feel anger rising inside me. What fucking right does he have to say he’ll interfere with me dating? Granted, dating is the last thing on my mind right now, but how dare he lay claim on me? I realize it’s because I’m pregnant with his child, but that doesn’t change who we are to each other.
I dump the rest of my coffee down the drain. My emotions are all over the place and I have no one to talk to. I place the cup in the sink and brace myself on the counter. The tears start again. I’m so fucking sick of crying right now.
After walking to the living room to grab a tissue, I flop down on the couch and try to calm myself, but as soon as my butt hits the cushion, there’s a knock at the door. I drag myself to the entryway to open it, and Audrey is on the other side with a tote bag.
“I brought supplies,” she says with a look on her face that screams, “You look like death.”
“That’s sweet of you.” I turn to walk into the kitchen, and she follows me in.
“I would ask if you’re sick, but your eyes are red, and your face is puffy. That’s not what sick Melonie looks like.”
“I’m not sick.”
“Then, what’s going on? I’m worried about you.”
“I can’t talk about it yet.”
Her lips form a tight line. “I promise I’ll be a vault, Melonie. When did Linc leave? Did he do something stupid?”
I sit in one of the chairs at the island, and she sits in the other.
“Audrey, if I tell you something, I need you not to tell anyone. Not Jax, not Gigi, no one.”
“You have my word.”
I force out a breath and rip off the Band-Aid. “I’m pregnant, and it’s Linc’s.”
“Holy fucking shit.” She stares across my kitchen.
“Yeah.”
We sit in silence for a moment. Finally, she turns to me and wraps me in her arms.
“How are you doing? Are we happy about this?”
She releases me and looks in my eyes, trying to gauge where I’m at.
“We’re happy. Scared, but happy.”
The worry starts to leave her face. “Did you tell Linc yet?”
“I told him last night.”
“Please tell me he wasn’t an ass.”
“He was great, actually. It’s fucking with me how great he was.”
She smiles. “Have to admit, it’s crazy to think of him as a father.”
“Right? When I told him, he was almost happy. He’s more calm about this than I am.”
“That freaks you out, doesn’t it? Someone else being more sure about something than you are.”
“He asked me to move in with him.”
“Not really surprised by that.”
I shake my head. “He said we could get a three-bedroom, and we would each have our own room. He said he wants to be around for everything. I thought he was insane.”
“I think it’s sort of sweet.”
“Are you crazy?”
“I know you think Linc can’t commit to anything, or I guess I should say to anyone. But gauging by how you said he reacted, maybe he wants to be a dad.”
“He might want to be a dad, but he’s never even lived with a woman before. How are you not shocked by what he said?”
“He’s jumping in with both feet. He’s planning, he’s problem-solving. It’s what guys do.” She shrugs.
“Well, I told him no.” I stand from my chair and throw away my tissue. “How do I know he won’t freak out and change his mind at some point? That a time won’t come when he decides he wants his freedom? Then I’ll be left high and dry.”
Audrey puts her elbows on the counter and reaches for one of my hands. “Melonie, I know you are fully capable of doing this on your own. I have no doubt that you will be an amazing mom. But what if you cut Linc some slack? It might be good to have help.”
“Can I be honest, and you not judge me?”
“Absolutely.”
“Linc and I aren’t together. We wouldn’t be a couple; we would be roommates. And frankly, I wouldn’t be able to take him dating other women right in front of me. I know that’s irrational, but it’s how I feel. And I want to keep my freedom, so maybe, someday, I can find a relationship. What would a man think if I told him, ‘Oh, yeah, it’s not a big deal, but I live with the father of my child’?”
“Do you plan on dating anytime soon?”
I laugh sarcastically. “No.”
“Then what if you lived with him for a trial period? You guys sign a six-month lease and test it out. If it doesn’t work, you get your own place. You have to move out of here, anyway. Why not use the next few months to see if it works?”
I take a few moments to think about what she’s proposing. “You’re Team Linc, huh?”
“I will always be Team Melonie first. I just think it might be a good solution. Let Linc demonstrate that he’s committed to the idea of being a father and let him be there for you. You don’t have to do this on your own. It’s okay to rely on him.” She squeezes my hand.
I’ve always been hyper-independent; it’s probably the reason I’m still single. Men have tried breaking down the final wall with me, but I just can never fully be vulnerable with someone. Can never let a man help me, financially or emotionally. I think about her words for a moment and maybe Audrey could be right. I’m already tired of doing everything on my own, and now, add growing a human to the mix, and I’m scared.
“I’ll think about it.”
“Good. I think Linc will surprise you.”
“I think I’ve had enough surprises over the past couple of days.” I laugh.
“Well, I have one more for you.” She digs in the tote bag and brings out a box. “Sweet potato donuts from Bostonia.”
She opens the box and pushes it over to me. The sugary scent passes in a wave over me and fuck my stomach. I cover my mouth and rush to the bathroom.
In between heaves, I hear her say, “So, donuts are a no.”