Chapter 42
Chapter forty-two
Lance
“Dad, you know how I have red hair?” Hannah asks innocently.
The hair on the back of my own neck stands up . This is the question I’ve been asking in my head for months. I’m terrified of the answer.
“Yes,” I reply, keeping my tone bland.
“Well, we’ve been learning about genetics in school, and the red hair gene is recessive.
It needs to come from both parents, so most likely if you have red hair, one of your parents will have red hair.
” She pauses and taps her lips with a finger.
“I was just wondering who in your family had red hair.”
“I don’t know,” I say honestly. There’s no point in lying to her; she isn’t stupid. “I’m not aware of anyone with red hair, but I didn’t get to know a lot of my dad’s family. There aren’t many pictures either, and most are in black and white.”
“Maybe I’ll ask Grams,” she says wistfully, lost in her own thoughts. The last thing I want her to do is to ask my mother.
I try to maintain a calm expression, but the panic rises as I listen to her talk.
She prattles on about distant family members and how physical characteristics are passed down through family lines.
My mother has never questioned Hannah’s parentage, but I know if she gets wind of any discrepancy, she will be a dog with a bone, hunting down the truth until it’s laid bare in front of her.
Katie wanders into the kitchen, thankfully diverting the conversation to other topics.
Hannah glares at her like she does every day.
If she was a cat, she would be hissing openly.
She has been marking her territory since Katie arrived by helping around the house and giving her opinion on every decision to be made, whether it is requested or not.
In the evening, Hannah sits beside me and holds my hand tight as if I might disappear if she lets go. I hoped having a woman in the house would calm her and build her confidence, but it seems she sees Katie as her direct competitor.
My choice to go to Katie after the accident sent Hannah into a spin.
The more I’ve thought about it, I realize that she felt I’d reordered my priorities.
What was something I had to do, going to Katie’s side, to Hannah felt like me choosing her.
Perhaps I should’ve taken her with me, but we do what we can in the moment.
Then when Katie moved in, Hannah doubled down, rejecting every attempt Katie has made to build a relationship with her.
I suppose considering everything my daughter’s dealt with these past few years—her mother’s abandonment, the bullying, my injuries—she’s terrified she’ll be displaced.
That there will be no room left for her, if Katie takes up space.
“What would everyone like for dinner?” Katie asks as she starts to empty the dishwasher.
“Not that crap you made the other night,” Hannah snaps. “It made me vomit. What did you call it? Curry? Gadz, it was awful.”
“Hannah,” I scold. “Apologize now. Don’t be so disrespectful.”
“No. I didn’t like it, and I won’t pretend I did. Is it not about time she went back to London, anyway?” She gestures in Katie’s direction. “She’s all better, isn’t she?”
“Hannah, don’t talk about Katie as if she isn’t here,” I whisper angrily to my daughter, who I’m trying to stay calm for, but struggling. “Katie’s offering to make your dinner. Be grateful.” She sticks out her bottom lip petulantly and storms from the room, slamming the door.
Katie gives me a soft smile. “Ignore it,” she says calmly. “I was a teenage girl once. I know what it’s like. All those hormones racing around your body. It’s tough.”
“But she can’t speak to you…”
Katie raises a hand. I stop speaking.
“Lance, it’s not that she hates me.” My brow creases, confused. The way Hannah talks, she does a good impression of hatred. “It’s that she frightened of losing her father. Concerned about where she fits in what to her is a new normal.”
I stare at the beautiful woman in front of me. She has been living with us for three months, and I hate the idea of her ever leaving. Life feels complete when she’s in my home with me and the children.
“Sometimes, we all just need time to figure out our place. Time to heal,” she says. “Be patient with her, like you’ve been with me. It’s the best medicine.”
Every day, she gets better mentally and physically, the Katie I knew before returning one giggle at a time. I’ve watched her take on more of the role of wife and mother. My dream is coming true before my eyes, and I don’t even know if she’s planning to stay. I’m frightened to ask.
As a military man, I keep a clean house, but now my house is a home.
Romantically, we haven’t progressed any further than a peck on the cheek.
I’m not even sure if we are a couple. She has her own room—what was Dog’s room is now a shrine to everything pink, fluffy, and sparkly.
Candles emitting flowery scents flicker around the house every night, and my sofa is filled with cushions.
“Did you hear Hannah asking about her hair?”
“Yes, I did.” Her lips turning into a sad smile, she places her hand on mine. “You’ve been wondering too, haven’t you? If she’s yours?”
I nod, sorrow filling my chest as I consider the implications of having my question answered.
“Lance, I think you must ask yourself how important the result is to you. Will it change anything? What benefit is there in knowing?” Her eyes are soft and wide, full of emotion as she speaks.
“Whatever happens, I’m here for you both.
As much as Hannah doesn’t like me, I’ve come to care for her.
I hope one day she will see me as a friend. ”
Without thinking, I take her in my arms and plant my lips on hers.
She freezes but immediately softens to my touch, responding to my kiss and letting my tongue invade her mouth.
It’s like tasting forbidden fruit; it’s explosive, and I’m intoxicated again within minutes.
Though, I don’t think I ever recovered from the initial hangover of losing her.
“This isn’t a good idea,” she whispers. “We’re not right for each other. I’m too old for you. I shouldn’t even be here.”
“That’s bullshit,” I snap. “I love you, Katie. For God’s sake, let me love you. If you didn’t feel the same way, don’t you think you’d have run back to London by now?”
Her gaze drops away, locking on the floor.
“Tell me why you’re still here,” I prompt. “If you don’t love me, I need to know why.”
“I do love you,” she mutters.
My heart races, and hope bubbles in my chest. She admitted that she loves me; this is progress.
“But I’m in my fifties. We’ve been through this. You deserve someone young with decades ahead of them. I’ll not sentence you to a life caring for me.”
I take her hands in mine.
“Please listen to me,” I plead. “Twenty years with you is better than forty with someone I don’t love.
Give us a chance, please. Be my partner, Katie.
Be a mother to my children. The mother you always wanted to be.
We all need you. David adores you, and you adore him.
Hannah will come around; she’s just scared.
She needs stability in her life, and so do I.
I want you in every way possible. You and my kids are my world. Please, don’t walk away from us.”
She lifts her hands to my face, and I kiss her palm. Tears pool in her eyes, threatening to fall. Her face is a complex mix of emotion. She’s warring with herself, what her heart wants against what her head thinks is right.
Before I met her, I didn’t believe the theory that age is just a number, but when you meet your soulmate, everything else is irrelevant but them.
Being with them is the most important thing in your world.
Life without them is dull and gray. I want to live in a world of vivid color alongside the woman I love. This woman.
“I don’t think I could walk away even if I wanted to,” she whispers against my lips. “If we do this, we do this forever. I can’t lose you again. I’d never survive it.”
We cling to each other, and I feel myself relax for the first time in weeks.
Since she started showing signs of being fully recovered from her ordeal in New York, I’ve been nervous.
Terrified, if I’m honest. I thought one day she would announce her exit from my life and be gone, disappearing back to her world in the south.
She would only be a memory to keep me company at night.
“What now?” she asks.
“We need to tell Hannah.”
“Tell me what?” Hannah’s sharp voice cuts across the kitchen.
I look at my daughter, and my stomach sinks.
This is not going to go down well; a full teenage tantrum is coming on.
Visions of glasses and plates being thrown across the room run through my mind.
I glance to where Hannah stands, looking for any weapons she may have at her disposal.
“Katie and I,” I begin. Sweat beads on my brow. Get a grip, I tell myself—this is your daughter, who is the bloody adult here? “We are together,” I state firmly. “This is not up for discussion. I want you to have an open mind, Hannah. Katie is a wonderful woman.”
Together. Mine. Sheer perfection. I can’t wait to hold her hand in public. Be official in the world. It’s all I’ve ever wanted since we met. A proper relationship with a future where we are together.
“She cares about you. Please, just give her a chance.”
Hannah’s eyes narrow, her mind obviously whirling with words. I don’t know if she’s going to explode or storm from the room again. She’s vying for her position in the home. She’s scared. Stay calm.
“Hannah,” Katie says quietly. “I’m not here to steal your dad from you. But I do love him. I have for a long time. When we were apart, I missed him immensely. We tried to stay apart, but we can’t.”
“But you’re so old,” Hannah says with a sneer.
Katie smiles. “Yes, I’m quite a bit older, but your dad and I have talked about this. We want to be together. All I ask is that you give us a chance.”
Defeated, Hannah shrugs her shoulders and leaves the room, completely surprising me. I expected more fight. More harsh words.
Katie gives me a sexy smile, then giggles under her breath. “It could have gone worse.”
“Teenagers are hard,” I huff. “Sometimes I just have no idea what to say to her. I wish she came with an instruction manual.”
“Women, whatever age, are a complex business. I’ll do my best to help.”
I smile at her like a loon. Her eyes dance, a knowing smile crossing her lips.
“What?” I ask.
“I could do with some help moving my stuff. Now we’re together, we’ll be sharing a room?”
“Hell, yeah.” I step forward, grabbing her ass with both hands, pulling her hard against me. “And as soon as I get you on my own, I’m showing you how much I’ve missed your body. Prepare to be cherished.”
David’s screams disturb the moment. He’s woken from his nap.
“I’ll get him,” Katie says as she hotfoots out the door toward the screaming baby. Minutes later, she arrives back with him expertly held in one arm and makes a bottle with the other. “Now, now, chicken,” she coos. “I’m just making your bottle. Your tummy will be full soon.”
David gulps his meal. She looks so at home with a baby in her arms. It saddens me that she never had the chance to experience having her own child. I hope she’ll come to think of my children as part of her family. She may never be their mother, but she can have an active role in their lives.
I know the road ahead will not be easy, but if we work together, we can create a loving family unit.