Chapter 19
NINETEEN
LEE
“Adrian, you’re on fire, man!”
Nate came up to Adrian in the locker room and slapped him on the back. He’d only allowed one hit, coming late enough in the game that we’d been on edge in anticipation of a no-hitter.
“For sure,” Silas agreed. “You should go out and celebrate tonight.”
Adrian shrugged. “Just taking my girl out to dinner.”
“Your girl?” I asked, winging a brow at him.
“Yeah, same one,” he said, leaning against the wall as Nate posed for some pictures with fans. “It escalated a little quickly. She’s here today.”
“Good for you,” I said, slapping his shoulder.
“I guess you were right. She didn’t care how I pitched.”
We shared a laugh. I was happy for him, if a little envious. His love life was probably mostly uncomplicated and easy, no hang-ups stopping him from doing what he wanted with whomever he wanted.
He didn’t have a thing for the friend taking care of his kid, a thing that haunted his dreams along with his every waking hour.
I’d been lucky that the guys hadn’t needed my help this game, as my mind was still on Stella, beautiful first thing in the morning even before I’d noticed her perfect breasts spilling out of her tank top, egging on all the fantasies of her I shouldn’t be having but seemed to compound every damn day.
We were still us, mostly, but a tension was pulsing between us that had almost come to a head this morning. I’d caught how she was looking at me and how her breath hitched when I’d come closer. This wasn’t one-sided, but knowing that only made it worse.
It was hard enough not to drown in all that beauty I’d been too stupid to see before and now didn’t want to look anywhere else.
I couldn’t think of a way out of this, other than saying fuck it all and going for it. It was still a bad idea, still wrong, still inconvenient as fuck.
My feelings had gone from a confusing awareness of her to a pure fucking yearning that was here to stay whether I liked it or not.
But I liked her. Too much. I’d run home every night this week for more time with Stella, wanting those extra minutes or even seconds with her.
She was too close yet so far away.
The hallway leading to the locker rooms was where families and friends came to see the players and staff after the game.
The staff usually chose random fans out of the crowd for photo ops with the team and would bring them back to meet the players.
I’d told Stella to meet me here, but I couldn’t find her or Bennie in the dissipating crowd.
“Daddy, you won again!”
Bennie appeared out of nowhere, charging at me with Stella laughing behind her.
“Well, I didn’t win. They did,” I said, lifting her up and setting her on my hip.
“Yeah, but you rearrange their bones so they can play. That’s why you’re a real doctor.” She dug her finger into my chest.
“Thanks, Ben,” I said, laughing as I kissed her cheek. “Did you have a good time with Stella?”
“Yes, she did. Although I got dumped for Taylor.” Stella tickled Bennie’s side.
Taylor was with her sister and Silas, talking to Nate after his last shot with a fan.
He looped his arm around Taylor’s shoulders, giving her neck a gentle tug, and I could make out the blush creeping up her teenage cheeks.
This guy put every female in a twenty-foot radius under a spell, although Stella had seemed immune so far.
Thank God.
“Hey, Bennie,” Adrian crooned, putting one hand behind his back. “I have something for you.”
“What is it?” Bennie’s eyes lit up as she kicked her feet against my hips.
“Easy, Ben,” I said, grabbing her foot before she nailed me right in the groin.
“This is a ball from today’s game. Chris held on to it from the last strikeout, so I wanted to give it to you.”
“It’s, like, a real baseball,” Bennie whispered, her jaw slack as she plucked it from Adrian’s palm. Her hands were tiny against the stitching as she wrapped them around it like a crystal ball.
“Yep, and it’s all yours.”
“Thank you!”
I set her down when she squirmed in my arms.
Adrian bent to give her a hug when she raced toward him.
“What are you doing with my girl, Adrian?”
Nate came up to them, his arms crossed.
“Look! Adrian gave me the ball from the game today!” She held it up, still clutching it in both her hands.
“It’s about time you had some competition.” Adrian knelt on the floor next to Bennie.
“Nate’s my favorite.” Her lips twisted as she peered up at Adrian. “But it’s okay. I can be your friend too.”
“Yeah, poor Adrian doesn’t have to embarrass himself.” Nate lifted Bennie up as Adrian shook his head. “But that is pretty cool of him to give you an official ball from a great game.”
“Yeah, I can’t wait to take this to school!”
“Bennie is pretty lucky to have ballplayers fighting over her,” Stella whispered to me. “Between them and you, her standards will be nice and high when she starts dating.”
“Please, Stell. Thanks for the compliment, but don’t keep me up at night.”
Any more than you already are.
“Good game, guys,” Deacon said, coming up to Adrian and Nate. “I was biting my nails for a little bit toward the end of the seventh.”
Deacon was an old friend of ours from Washington and had been with the Bats since the beginning of the season as a batting coach. He’d been well-known in his playing days, but he hadn’t had legend status like Silas.
“Yeah, it sucks,” Adrian said. “Maybe next time.”
“Nothing sucked,” Silas said. “Getting that close is a huge accomplishment.”
“For as long as Silas and I played, I can count the no-hitters we’ve seen on one hand,” Deacon said. “So, like he said, a huge accomplishment even to get close.” He smiled, stilling when his eyes landed on Stella.
“Nice to see you again, Stella.”
“Again?” I looked between them.
“We met when he was visiting his parents in our section,” Stella said.
“And she told him that she doesn’t have a husband, so she can live with us for the season,” Bennie added, rolling her baseball between her palms.
“Speaking of competition…” Nate sang in a low whisper, biting back a smile as he set Bennie down.
“How…how did that even come up?” I asked, clearing my throat when I caught the edge in my voice.
Bennie shrugged, still focused on the ball.
“He asked Stella if her husband or her boyfriend was mad that she was living with us, and she told him she didn’t have any and asked him if he was asking her if she was single.”
Stella clenched her eyes shut as rage thrummed in my veins. What the hell was wrong with Deacon that he was hitting on Stella in front of my kid? And why was Stella playing along? If she was playing along.
I rubbed at the vein pulsing on the side of my head.
“Doc’s gonna blow,” Adrian whispered to Nate, both of them watching me.
“Or he’s gonna lose his back teeth.” Nate snickered.
“Stella, can you hold my baseball while I go to the bathroom?” Bennie asked, bouncing back and forth on her feet.
“How about we put it in my bag until we get home? Come on, I’ll take you.” She took the baseball with one hand, shoving it inside her purse, and grabbed Bennie’s hand with the other. “I think I saw a bathroom down the hall.”
“Yes, right before the exit,” I said slowly, trying to keep my voice even and not scare my daughter. “I’ll meet you there.”
“Sounds good,” Stella said, rushing with Bennie down the hall as if she were trying to escape.
Silas murmured something to Rachel as she nodded, both of them squinting at me as if I’d lost my mind.
They’d be right.
Stella was taking care of Bennie when I was away. When I was home, she could do whatever she wanted with whomever she wanted. If Deacon wanted to take her out, I had no say or claim to her, and I shouldn’t have wanted to punch a friend for simply asking her if she was single.
But my hands were balled into fists at my sides anyway.
This wasn’t me. I wasn’t some possessive prick who wouldn’t let anyone look at his girl.
But she wasn’t my girl. She was my friend and my daughter’s temporary babysitter. Yet the thought of her with anyone else, a friend or some random guy, made me want to climb the concrete wall right after I bashed my head against it.
“Don’t you two have somewhere to be?” Silas asked Nate and Adrian. “Get cleaned up and get out of here.”
“Got it, Coach. Have a good night, everyone.” Adrian gave me a sheepish smile before he disappeared down the hall.
“Listen, I shouldn’t get involved,” Nate started as he stepped up to Deacon. He had the decency to grimace when he met my gaze.
“You guys are supposed to be old friends or something, but if he knows how to snap the bones back together—” Nate pointed his thumb at me “—he probably knows how to break them easier. Just saying.” He winced and backed away toward the locker room.
“I am so sorry,” Deacon said, eyes wide. “Listen, I had no idea you guys were tog—”
“We aren’t. She’s my friend, and she’s watching Bennie for me for the season.” I dragged a hand down my face and tried to get a handle on myself. I was not only acting like a dick, but an unprofessional dick in front of guys from the team and their coaches.
“If you want to date her, that’s your business. Just maybe don’t hit on her in front of my kid.”
“I didn’t hit on her. I was more poking for information. She’s beautiful, and again, I didn’t think you were together—”
“We’re not.”
Deacon laughed.
“Then why do you look like you want to take a swing at me? Nate’s right. You could snap my neck pretty quickly if you wanted to. And right now, you kinda look like you want to.”
My body was still rigid from head to toe, and I could barely get a sentence out without sounding like I was ready to pounce. What was the point of denying it?
“So I will back off.” He held up his hands, his lips curving. “I’m happy for you, man.”
“Happy for me?”
Another laugh rumbled out of his chest.
“Whatever is going on, I’m glad you found a woman to make you this nuts. Means she’s special. And she seemed nice for the few minutes I spoke to her. Good for you.”