Chapter 35 Reyna #2
“I was always there, Reyna. Even if you never saw me, I was there for you at every step.” It’s like his heart is shattering in front of me, and maybe it makes me a monster to feel happy that he’s capable of hurting like I did.
“I was sitting at the back of the lecture hall when you played a tree in second grade. You had a sneezing fit that made that boy you had a crush on, Justin, angry during his solo. I was there when you won the Chelsea Kennedy film grant and later came third at the Avery Film Festival.”
“What?” I whisper.
“I paid for all of your film classes. Donated to your high school so they could expand the art department. I made sure Mrs. Norton retired early after she made you cry in class. I ensured a job position opened up for you at the museum near your old house. Did background checks on every one of your boyfriends before you went on your first dates. I fired two of your therapists so you could see someone better. Asked your mom to take you to art galleries because I couldn’t do it. ”
He… The tears flow freely down my face. This whole time I thought I existed to him for a handful of days a year, and those hours were a chore for him. But he was there, loving me from afar.
“I agree, it wasn’t nearly enough.” He edges closer. “Allow me to make it up to you and your mother. It’s what she would have wanted. We owe it to her. I promise that you are under my protection from here on out. Roland won’t go anywhere near you.”
My nails dig crescent moons into my palm as I try to get my emotions under control. I can’t unpack years of neglect right now. Just because he did all those things doesn’t change the fact that he could have texted or called to ask about my day once in a while.
Or not have faked his fucking death.
For a second I want to run up to my dad and cry into his arms like I never got to as a kid. All I wanted was for him to be around. Learning that he was always in the background? Finding out that maybe he loved me in his own way? It shatters everything I thought I knew.
“Why didn’t you tell me? Why did you let me believe that you didn’t care?” I ask through the tears.
His throat bobs. “We thought it was for the best. I realized too late how wrong we were.”
We.
Mom didn’t want me to know either? I cover my mouth with my hand to contain my sob.
Far too much has happened in the past two days—in the past few years. Maddox, James, and even Mom pulled wool over my eyes.
That changes tonight.
The road to forgiveness is a long one. If he really means it—if everything he says is true, then he can show me.
“If you, or any person in the Order, harms a hair on Maddox’s or his brother’s head, you will be dead to me. There will be no second chances.” My safety means nothing if I’m the only one who survives. “And don’t think I won’t find out. I will, some way, somehow.”
He tips his chin. “Understood.”
“That means there will be no repercussions if Maddox calls off the engagement,” I clarify.
It’s hard to read his expression, but it’s obvious he’s going to disagree. “Roland and the Dorn—”
“None. No exceptions.” I’m proud that my voice doesn’t shake. “Mom might have turned a blind eye and forgiven you every time you hurt her, but I am not my mother.”
“No, you’re my daughter.”
“In flesh alone.”
“That will change in time.” There’s a challenge in his voice that I don’t miss. “Anything else?”
I narrow my eyes as my mind churns to come up with something else. “The…” I swallow. “The man that I stabbed?”
“The place was cleaned out before Maddox made his first call.” It’s the most confident I’ve seen him tonight.
Oh, thank God. I’m not going to jail.
I tip my head up, meeting his challenge. “I want an apology.”
“There are many things I regret. Leaving you and your mother behind is my greatest one of all. I apologize—”
“Not to me. I want you to apologize to Mom.”
“I have every day since I left.”
Out of everything he’s said, it’s the one thing I believe to be true without a shadow of a doubt, because somewhere deep down, I know he loved her too.
Maddox steps forward so that he’s plastered to my side. “While we’re on the topic of making demands, your daughter and I are together, and you won’t be doing anything about it.”
James becomes all hard edges, reaching for his gun again. “You aren’t in the position to be making any—”
“Nothing,” I emphasize. “No interference of any kind, or else your chance at redemption is over.” It’s up to me to decide whether our relationship is temporary or permanent. With both of them.
James doesn’t hesitate to swing his stare at Maddox. His face is devoid of his emotion, but there’s no mistaking the venom dripping from his voice. “You hurt her, and I have a bullet reserved for your skull.”
Maddox leans back against the kitchen counter before I can snap, looking as relaxed as if we were having a friendly conversation. “At this rate, I believe she’ll beat you to it if I so much as think about hurting her.”
Their stare-off sets me on edge because I know how fake Maddox’s casual demeanor is. I’m tempted to step between them to slice the tension in half. James must realize because he matches Maddox’s laid-back stance, and takes a step away.
“Breakfast on Wednesday,” James orders in the same voice he used on me when Mom told him I was slacking on the chores. “I’d like for us to catch up.”
I shake my head. “I’m not ready for that.”
Maddox’s dad tried to kill me, and I just found out my father faked his own death. I’m going to need time to process. Maybe talk it out with a therapist, and potentially get blackout drunk with Kimi and Nicole.
“Being ready isn’t a state of mind. It’s a choice.”
I nearly roll my eyes. He and Mom always loved his poster sayings. “Then you can wait until I’ve made that choice.”
I’m unsure at what point in the conversation he thought he could start ordering me around, but he’s sorely misjudged. If the strained look on his face is any indication, he isn’t used to someone else calling out the shots.
He holds out his hand. “Truce?”
I hesitate before shaking it. “For now. For Mom.”
“I’ll be at Harper’s Diner at eight on Wednesday should you change your mind.” Nodding my head, I take his business card. “Call me if you need anything—and I mean anything.”
I won’t. “Okay.”
My knuckles turn white as I grip the card tighter, watching him walk out of the front door. The silence that follows the shutting door is maddening.
“You really are your father’s daughter.”
My attention snaps toward Maddox, who’s still leaning against the counter and grinning, making me forget all about my rising anxiety.
“I am nothing like my father,” I grit out.
“Whatever you say.”