34. Reed
The last twenty four hours have been playing on loop in my mind.
From waking up at the lodge with Wilder still wrapped around me, to seeing Eloise unexpectedly, to propositioning my father and agreeing to give up my life.
All of it colliding in a mess of epic proportions that keeps me from sleeping all night.
I’m still not sure I can make sense of it all, not whatever happened with Wilder to push him into another panic attack, and certainly not agreeing to marry my best friend, and pretend to the world that I am straight.
Eloise said she was fine, but I heard her crying in the bathroom, and that only made me feel ten times worse.
It’s not just my freedom I’m giving away, but hers too, and it makes me feel like everything is out of my control.
All I want to do is be myself and protect my brother, but I can’t do both.
So now I have to ruin both our lives to keep him safe.
I FaceTimed with Freddie just to make myself feel better and he looked happy, but I know from experience that’s only because my father wasn’t home yet.
I pretended to be asleep when Eloise finally came back into the room, too lost in my own head to even try and make her feel better, but sleep never claimed me.
Instead all I could think about was Wilder, not just because of what happened at the lodge, but because he hasn’t left me alone for even a second.
His first messages came after he got back to his room.
Wilder - My bed won’t be the same without you
Wilder - I seem to remember you cuddling me last night
Wilder - Did you know it’s rude to gift something and then take it away?
The next one came this morning when he went to the gym.
Wilder - Want to get sweaty with me, Blue?
Wilder - **Image attached**
That one was paired with a picture of him looking sinfully good in his small black shorts and black tank. I’m not ashamed to admit that I saved it and added it to a private folder on my phone.
After that I got a post-workout one.
Wilder - I reckon we could both fit in this shower
Wilder - **Image attached**
The picture he sent that time showed his torso slick with water, leading all the way down to his prominent deep V, before it was promptly cut off. Again it went straight to that private folder, while cursing his name to the damn Devil for how good he looks.
The problem isn’t that I’m attracted to him. It’s that I know I want him, and that I can’t have him, and for some reason it seems it’s his mission in life to make mine as hard as possible. Pun intended. It’s why he’s smirking at me now, even though he is supposed to be focused on his shoot.
The energy drink brand hand-picked him, among a couple of the other racers, to do this photoshoot, and while yes, he looks as good as he always does, he really needs to pay attention.
“Wilder, eyes over here for us,” one of the photographers calls, and he obeys, only for his stare to come back to meet mine a few seconds later.
“Oh he is down bad for you,” Eloise says quietly from beside me, watching the same show I am, and I can’t even deny it.
I know what it looks like when somebody wants someone, and it appears Wilder Miles has decided to openly want me.
“He’s beating a dead horse and he knows it,” I grunt back, taking my own behind the scenes photos, and she only hums silently in response.
“I think it’s the beating he’s interested in,” she claps back with a smirk, and I shove her with my hip to scold her, as someone appears on her other side.
“Well if it isn’t the happy couple,” they greet us, and I turn to find Zara Michaels smiling at us both. “It’s Lamont, right?” she asks, her eyes trailing over Eloise, but it’s clear she is talking to me.
“Yeah, but friends call me Reed,” I reply, holding out my hand for her to shake, and she takes it even though she continues to avoid my stare. “And this is Eloise,” I add, as my best friend shuffles slightly under the scrutiny.
“It’s nice to meet you,” Eloise says softly, smiling at her, and Zara looks completely captivated.
“Eloise,” she repeats, as if testing the name on her tongue. “You’re here to support the nepo baby?” she asks, making Eloise frown.
“The nepo baby?”
Zara nods her head at Wilder. “Yeah, the nepo baby prince of The Academy,” she confirms, and I bite back my smile knowing Wilder can probably hear her every word.
When I turn my focus back to him, he is glaring at Zara, before coming back to me. “Yeah, I guess I am,” Eloise confirms, and I can tell she is feeling slightly flustered, which I can’t say I blame her.
Zara Michaels has become a PRI superstar over the last three years, and right now all of her attention is on my best friend. “Maybe you should stay for the next shoot and see some real talent,” she says smoothly, flirting hard, and I have to hide my surprise at what is happening right now.
“Oh, are you better than him?” Eloise asks completely innocently, considering she has exactly zero interest in sports, and Zara smirks widely.
“My tits certainly are.” At that my best friend blushes furiously, only making Zara look even more interested, as someone who I think is her manager calls her name. She gives my best friend one more look up and down before she starts to back away. “I hope to see you around, Princess.”
We both watch her leave, until my best friend’s wide stare comes back to meet mine. “Okay, who the hell was that?”
“Zara Michaels, 24, single, refers to herself as a pansexual princess on her social media profile.” I list off everything I know about her that Eloise will care about, before I add, “Oh, and an absolute powerhouse on the PRI circuit, who was most definitely flirting with you.”
Eloise blushes again. “Don’t be ridiculous, she was not flirting with me,” she starts, as Wilder comes over to get a drink.
“Was Michaels flirting with you?” he asks her by way of greeting, and I can’t help but snort a laugh.
“No.”
“Absolutely.”
We both say at the same time, making Wilder look between us, before settling his stare on me. “Are they getting my good side, Blue?” he asks, taking a drink from his water bottle, and I hate the way I watch how his throat works.
“Every side is your good side, and you know that as well as I do, so get your ass back to work and stop pissing off the photographers,” I tell him firmly, but all it does is make him smirk at me.
“Good to know you’ve been checking me out,” he replies with a wink, putting his water bottle down and going back to his spot.
“I really like him,” Eloise whispers, her words fixing round my heart like a vice, and all I can do is nod.
Because the problem is, I really like him too.
The atmosphere at the EWC is nothing like PRI.
All thirty-six racers are geared up and ready to go, and the tension in the air is thick.
They only run three races, no pre-qualifiers, no skills test, no safety net, just a fight to the death.
Whoever ends in the bottom twelve of the first race will be cut instantly, same for the second race in two days, and then the remaining twelve will fight for first place.
Wilder is most definitely out of his league, but you wouldn’t know it by looking at him.
If anything, he looks ready to take on the world.
Both his dad and Sid are by his side, running through last checks with him, and I take a few shots of them looking eager and focused.
Given the invite here was a surprise to everyone, I want to document it as much as possible.
Like with his PRI run, all eyes here are on the rookie, waiting to see how well he will do.
I know Wilder hates that fact, but he got here on skill alone, and he should be proud of that fact.
The rest of the guys are in the garage, excited but on edge, and I can’t help but feel the same, because it doesn’t matter the result of today, it just matters that he made it here.
I’m so happy to be here to see it, especially since my father is now gone.
I got word this morning from his assistant that his flight already left, and I imagine I won’t see him again until I make it back to the States after the season ends.
A fact that should allow me to breathe more easily, but all it does is remind me that my last shreds of freedom are now on a countdown.
Eloise at least seems better today, but I’m not sure if that’s the lack of his presence, or the view, seeing as though she can’t take her eyes off Zara Michaels.
“What are you staring at so hard there, babe?” I ask, and her eyes instantly avert from the woman in question.
“Just taking everything in,” she quickly lies, pulling her sunglasses down from her head, and I smirk.
Not that I can call her out for it or blame her, I haven’t exactly been averting my eyes away from Wilder today. Not when he looks hot as hell in his black racing suit, and I also know what he looks like underneath.
“If you say so,” I muse, letting myself look back at my own little racer, only to find Wilder already watching me with his phone in his hand, smirking.
As if on cue my phone vibrates in my hand.
Wilder - Keep your eyes on me, this is gonna be hard and fast, just the way we both like it
Heat rushes through me, and when I look back at him he is still watching me, despite the fact his father and Sid are still talking to him.
His relentless flirting makes me miss the version of him that acted like he hated me.
I found it easier to deal with that version, because this one has me feeling out of my depth.
For the first time all day I type out a response.
Reed - Just keep your eyes on the prize, Miles
My text has him smirking, before he taps out his own reply.
Wilder - Trust me, Blue, I am