51. Wilder
Idon't know why I'm fucking here. Well that’s not true, I do know, and it’s Matteo’s fucking ability to not take no for an answer.
He was the one who got the invite, because of course he did, and he called me and declared me as his plus one instantly.
I tried to put up a fight, I even put the phone down and blocked his number, but he hunted me down at The Academy, while I was in the middle of teaching one of my first classes.
That caused a spectacle of course, and the only way he would agree to leave was if I agreed to come with him.
I’d have let him down at the last minute, but Beckett said he was sick of me drinking and moping around, and if I didn’t come, the only place I was going was to the pits with him.
So here I am.
“This is a terrible idea,” I scoff, desperately trying to loosen my tie, because apparently not only did I have to come to this thing, but I also had to dress appropriately.
His words, not mine.
“Yeah it’s probably not great,” he agrees from beside me, and I turn to glare at him.
“Then why the fuck are we doing it?”
Matt only shrugs. “You’ll regret it if you don’t.”
I snort. No, I regret letting myself fall for my PR assistant so he was able to rip my heart out, but hey what do I know.
The mansion comes into view at the end of the long driveway, lit up like it's hosting an awards ceremony instead of a birthday party, and I scoff. Luxury cars line both sides of the entrance, and when we step out of ours, I can hear music drifting out through the open doors. Everything about this place screams money, cold and cynical in every way, and it seems nothing like Reed at all. I try to picture him growing up here, but it’s impossible.
I grip the small black gift box sitting in my hand a little tighter. It’s something I picked up two months ago when we were in Italy, but it feels a little stupid now. This whole thing is stupid, it’s not like we are still… whatever we were.
“I shouldn't fucking be here,” I curse again, but Matteo only cocks his head at me and smiles.
“So why are we still walking?”
The front doors are already open, and we step inside pretty much unnoticed as the ballroom falls strangely quiet. Then I hear his father’s voice giving a speech, and my entire body is instantly on edge.
“We’ll wait until he’s done,” Matt says, tugging me to the back of the crowd, but my eyes are already on the staircase where Reed’s father stands.
Reed is standing right next to him, looking handsome in his dark suit and perfectly styled hair, and of course Eloise looks perfect at his side.
He doesn’t look happy, despite the smile on his face.
If anything he looks tired, like he hasn’t slept much in the last two weeks either, and something softens inside of me.
Maybe my mom was right, maybe I just need to rip the Band-Aid off and talk to him.
Then I hear it. “It gives me enormous pleasure to announce the engagement of my son, Prescott Lamont and his wonderful bride-to-be, Eloise Hartwell.”
Time stops, everything inside of me shutting down, as applause explodes around me.
Beside me, Matteo goes completely rigid.
“Shit,” he curses, his voice barely audible.
“Wild.” He says my name in a panic, but I barely hear it, my mind too caught up on the ring box in Reed’s hand. “Wild, I'm so sorry.”
He reaches for my arm, but I step away before he can touch me, too lost in what I am seeing right now, as the crowd begins to move.
It parts in time for me to see Reed place the ring on her finger and embrace her, before pulling apart and finding me staring.
It’s the first time his smile falters, his eyes widening at the sight of me, but he doesn’t say anything, as his father’s hand slips around his back.
I watch them both in disbelief, noting his father’s stare is on Matteo instead of me, but Reed’s gaze is locked on mine.
My heart is racing wildly in my chest, as the last four months of us collide together in my brain.
All the late nights, all the early mornings, all the times I felt his heart beat against mine, it all meant nothing.
“I can’t be here.” I turn around and walk straight back toward the entrance, ignoring Matteo calling my name.
The cool night air hits me the second I step outside, but it does nothing to dull the burning ache now spreading across my chest. He’s engaged. My Blue is engaged. My breaths are coming in too fast for me to control, as my eyes bounce widely around the foreground, looking for car we came in.
“Wild!” Reed’s voice, not Matteo’s.
Fuck it, forget the car, I’ll walk.
I start storming down the long driveway, walking faster than I ever have before, but still I hear his footsteps behind me.
Then a hand catches my wrist and I stop, closing my eyes so I don’t have to look at him right away.
Not until I gain my composure, which is impossible when just the feel of his fingers is sending a magnetic pulse right through me.
When I finally meet his stare, Reed is breathing hard, his wild stare searching mine, as he shakes his head in disbelief. “Wild,” he says again, panting now from rushing after me, and I flinch.
“Don’t call me that.”
“What are you doing here?”
The question almost makes me laugh, because he’s right, what the fuck am I doing here? He told me it was a bit of fun, he told me he couldn’t be with me, so why the fuck did I think I could change that?
“Clearly being fucking stupid,” I snap back, the words come out sharper than I intended.
He opens his mouth again, but I don't give him the chance to say anything else.
Instead, I shove the gift I brought against his chest and he catches it automatically, staring down at the neatly-wrapped box.
“I bought it before Vegas.” My voice is empty and flat now, and it takes everything I have to pull myself away from him.
“Congratulations.” The single word nearly tears my throat apart, and then I turn and walk away, not looking back.
I don’t know how long I walk for, but one minute I am standing outside Reed’s father’s house, and the next I am pushing through the steel doors of Caden’s office at The Underground.
No one stops me on my way in, clearly the look on my face is enough, and it’s also clear that Caden was made aware of my presence the second I got here.
“Call it off,” I demand as soon as I enter, but he doesn't look up from the paperwork spread across his desk.
“Call who off?”
“Your guys, Duchess, Blackwell, whoever,” I list off, and he raises his eyes, waiting for me to continue.
“Whoever you’ve got looking into Reed’s father, just call it off, it doesn’t matter anymore,” I tell him.
“Nothing matters anymore,” I add almost silently, slumping into the chair across from him.
Caden studies me for a long moment, then quietly asks, “Are you sure about that?”
“He's engaged.” My voice sounds hollow. “So whatever game was going on between us, it’s over now.”
Without saying another word, Caden reaches to the corner of his desk, and then slides a thick manila folder across the polished wood until it stops in front of me.
“What's this?”
“The reason I can’t call them off.”
I don’t touch it, I can’t. “Whatever is in there won’t explain their engagement.”
Caden leans back in his chair. “Doesn’t it?” When I lift my stare from the file I find him watching me, and he shrugs. “People do crazy things to protect the people they care about.”
The words land heavily between us, and I stare at him. “Is that what you did?”
At my question his jaw tightens, his eyes drifting to the window that overlooks the main VIP bar, before coming back to me. He doesn’t say anything, but I see a look in his eyes that tells me more than words ever could.
That’s exactly what he did.
My eyes flick back down to the folder. “What’s in there?” I ask, almost certain I don’t want to know.
“You should read it.”
“I don’t think I…” I start, but Cade cuts me off.
“Wilder, you need to read it.” His voice is quiet and calm, and my fingers reach out tentatively to see what’s inside.
The first page is a summary of what has been found, all the information neatly tabbed, and my heart snags on the one that says ‘Medical Records’.
Flicking my attention back to Cade, he nods, so I push on, skipping right to that section and finding my worst nightmare.
Emergency department reports, hospital admissions, orthopedic consultations, concussion assessments.
There are pages and pages of injuries, all summarized in black and white, going back almost a decade, not just for Reed, but his mom too.
Then a more recent one of his brother’s broken wrist. Bile crawls up the back of my throat, but I don’t look away, I can’t.
There are X-rays and photographs, even ones with words like ‘suspected non-accidental injury’ and my breathing catches.
They knew, they fucking knew, and did nothing.
I take in pictures of dark fingerprints around a teenage boy’s upper arm, a split lip, a swollen cheek, with reports so cynical beneath them that it makes me sick.
These only document the times Reed went to hospital for his injuries, but what about all the other times?
Because I know Reed would have only sought help when he needed to.
Again I read words like, ‘Patient states he fell down stairs’, ‘Injuries inconsistent with report’, ‘Patient declines police involvement’, and ‘Patient accompanied by friend, Eloise Hartwell’.
All of them explained his injuries with nothing but bullshit, as he flip-flopped between different hospitals around the state.
The more I read, the more my hands begin to shake.
Another page.
‘Historical concerns dating back several years…’’
Another.
‘School counsellor documented repeated unexplained injuries.’
The words blur together as I think about Reed as a child looking for help and protecting his father, all in one fell swoop. Why didn’t anybody do anything? Why did nobody stop him? The reports just show the same cycle over and over again, every report ending with no further action.
I keep going, flipping faster now, searching for the page when it ends, but it just keeps going.
The reports continue into adulthood, less frequent then, but never non-existent, and my chest tightens so violently I can't pull in a full breath. The room tilts and suddenly the pages slip from my fingers, papers scattering everywhere, but I don’t even try to stop it.
Caden moves to sit beside me, but he doesn’t say anything, doesn’t touch me, or try to make me feel better, he just watches me, and waits. Because he knows what’s in there, he would have read every word himself, and he knows there is nothing he can do or say right now to make me feel better.
“I want him dead, Cade,” my voice barely audible, but I know Caden hears me. “I don’t care what you do, do what it takes. I need him gone.”
I think about the night I patched him up, how resigned he seemed to his injuries, and yes I was mad, but I never imagined it going this deep.
Then I think about that day before it happened, how Reed was surprised to see his father, how he looked on edge, the mention of his brother breaking his arm.
All of it rushes through my mind, as things start to fall into place.
“He’s protecting him,” I whisper. “He was just a kid and he went through all this, and he doesn’t want it to be the same for him.” The words scrape out of my throat, and Caden moves to make me a drink, handing me an almost full tumbler of amber liquid.
I swallow it whole.
“Eloise came to visit him, she knew, he must have made some kind of deal to protect him.” I know I’m probably not making any sense to Caden right now, but I need it to make sense to me first. The visit, Reed telling me it was a bit of fun, and now an engagement.
“People do crazy things to protect the people they care about,” I repeat quietly, as everything suddenly clicks into place.
He didn’t choose Eloise, he chose his brother, and sacrificed himself in the process. To protect him, because he loves him, and now I must do the same.