Chapter 35
JACKSON
Emma doesn't speak to me for days. Not the hospital, not when I bring Ethan to visit Sofia, not even when we're in the same room.
She looks through me like I'm furniture, like I'm nothing.
Maya's taking it worse. I found her in the guest room on day two, staring at the wall, hands shaking. She hasn't eaten, hasn't slept, and the dark circles under her eyes are deeper than they were when she first arrived in October.
"You need to eat something," I tell her.
"I'm not hungry."
"Maya..."
"She won't even look at me, Jackson." Her voice cracks. "I've lost her."
"You haven't lost her; she's angry. There's a difference."
"Is there?"
I don't have an answer for that.
Chase pulls me aside at the hospital on day three. Sofia's in her isolette, Emma's hand through the porthole, and Maya's standing at a distance like she's afraid to get too close, like proximity will make Emma's rejection more painful.
"Outside," Chase says. "Now."
We walk to the parking garage. He lights a cigarette, something I didn't know he did, and offers me one. I shake my head.
"Emma's destroying herself over this," he says, exhaling smoke. "She's not sleeping, barely eating. Pumping every three hours and crying between sessions."
The guilt sits heavy in my chest. I've been so focused on Maya's pain that I haven't fully considered what this is doing to Emma.
"I know."
"Do you?" He takes a drag. "Because from where I'm standing, you fucked up. Both of you."
I want to argue, to defend our choices, but he's right. "I know that too."
"She doesn't care that you're together; she cares that you lied." He flicks ash onto the concrete. "You made her feel stupid, like she couldn't be trusted with the truth."
"That wasn't..."
"I know what you meant to do. Protect her, keep her stress-free during the pregnancy.
Noble as hell." He looks at me, and there's no judgment in his expression, just brutal honesty.
"But you took away her choice. You decided what she could handle instead of letting her decide for herself.
Believe me, I made that same mistake a few years ago, and you gave me hell for it. "
The words hit like a slapshot to the chest.
"What do I do?"
"Give her time. Let her be angry, don't try to fix it yet." He stubs out the cigarette. "She's hurt, but she's not done with you, either of you. She just needs to feel it first."
I nod, processing his words. He makes it sound so simple, but nothing about this feels simple. “The trial's soon."
"I know."
"Maya's going to testify; she needs Emma there. She needs..."
"I'll talk to her." Chase starts toward the entrance, then stops and turns back.
"But you need to understand something, Jackson.
Emma's not just your sister—she's Maya's best friend.
And right now, she's terrified she's lost that.
So maybe worry less about what you can do for Emma, and more about what the two of you can do for her. "
He's right. Of course, he's right.
Inside, Maya's still standing away from the isolette. Emma's talking to Sofia, voice soft, telling her daughter about the mobile they bought for the nursery, about the way the stars glow in the dark.
I walk over to Maya. She doesn't look at me. It’s as though something terrible will happen if she looks away.
"Chase thinks she'll come around," I say quietly.
"When?"
The desperation in her voice cuts through me. "I don't know."
"I can't do the trial without her." Maya's voice is barely a whisper. "I can't get up there and talk about what happened without her in that room."
I want to tell her she can, want to be the support she needs, but I know better.
Emma glances over. For a second, our eyes meet, then she looks away like the sight of us causes her physical pain.
"We'll figure it out," I say.
"How?"
I don't have an answer for that either.
Emma has finally started speaking to me.
We're at home. She's in the living room folding baby clothes, and I'm making coffee in the kitchen. Maya's upstairs, hiding from both of us.
"I'm going to the trial," Emma says.
I turn, coffee forgotten. She's not looking at me. Instead, she’s focused on a tiny onesie in her hands, but she's talking, and that's something.
"Okay."
"She's going to need someone there, and I'm not letting her go through that without me." Emma's jaw tightens, and I can see her fighting back tears. "Even if I'm furious with her."
"Emma..."
"I'm still angry, Jackson. Don't think this means I've forgiven either of you."
I lean against the counter, gripping the edge until my knuckles turn white. "I know."
"I just..." She stops, sets down the onesie, and finally looks at me. "She's my best friend. And she's about to relive the worst thing that ever happened to her in front of a room full of strangers. I'm not missing that."
I want to tell her how sorry I am, how much we've hated lying to her, but the words feel inadequate.
"Thank you," I say.
"Don't thank me. I'm not doing this for you."
She's lying, she's doing it for Maya, but she's also doing it for me. She knows what Maya means to me, because somewhere under the anger, she still cares.
"Can we talk?" I ask, taking a risk. "You, me, and Maya? Before the trial?"
"I don't know if I'm ready..."
"You don't have to forgive us, just hear us out. Please."
She's quiet for a long time. I can see her weighing it, deciding whether we deserve the chance.
"Fine. Tonight. After Ethan's in bed."
Bedtime came faster than I anticipated. Chase takes Ethan upstairs for bed, while Emma settles into the armchair, arms crossed, looking like she's bracing for a fight. Maya and I are on the couch, a careful distance between us like we're afraid to touch in front of her.
"Talk," Emma says.
I look at Maya. Her hands are twisted in her lap like she's trying to hold herself together. I take one of them and squeeze. Emma's eyes track the movement.
"I love her," I start, my voice steady even though my heart is racing. "This isn't casual, this isn't some fling. She's it for me."
"I know that," Emma says, and there's exhaustion in her voice. "I've known that for years. You think I didn't see the way you looked at her? The way you'd find excuses to be in the same room?"
That catches me off guard. "Then why are you angry?"
"Because you didn't trust me!" Her voice breaks. "You made that decision for me instead of letting me make it myself."
"We were scared," Maya says quietly.
"Of what?"
"Of losing you." Maya looks up, meeting Emma's eyes. "Of you making me choose between you and him, of everything falling apart."
"I would never make you choose."
"I know that now." Maya's voice is barely audible. "I should have always known that. But I was stupid and scared, and I handled it wrong."
Emma's face softens. I can see the war happening inside her—anger battling with understanding.
"You should have told me after things calmed down. After therapy, after—"
"Things never calmed down," I say. "We had a plan to tell you. And then everything happened."
Emma looks between us.
"Do you understand why I'm upset?"
"Yes," we say together.
"And do you understand that it's going to take me time to process this?"
Maya nods.
Emma's quiet. The clock ticks, Max jumps onto her lap purring, and the silence stretches.
"I want to be happy for you," she says finally. "I do. You're perfect for each other. But it’s going to take me time to process it properly."
"Take all the time you need," Maya whispers.
"And stop apologizing every five seconds.” Emma scratches Max behind the ears, then looks at her. "I'm still upset. But I love you. That hasn't changed."
Maya stands, crosses to Emma, and kneels in front of her chair.
"I love you. You're my sister, my family. The person who saved me when I had nowhere else to go."
Emma touches Maya's face. "You already saved yourself. I just gave you a place to do it."
The next morning, Emma asks Maya to come to the hospital, just the two of them.
Maya comes back three hours later, eyes swollen but lighter.
"She's coming to the trial," Maya says, settling onto the couch beside me. "She's going to sit right behind me the whole time."
I'm smiling before I can stop myself.
She looks at me. "You knew?"
"I knew. But I wanted her to tell you."
Maya shakes her head, a small smile tugging at her lips. She leans into me, and we sit here in the quiet, and for the first time in days, things feel almost normal.
Almost.
Because the trial's in six days and Maya's about to face the man who destroyed her.
But at least now Emma will be there.
And maybe that's enough to get us through.