23. Jax
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
JAX
I’m driving to the rink for morning skate, and usually I take this time to visualize the goals I have for myself for the game.
Instead, my mind is consumed with all the things I plan on doing to Kiley later tonight.
She was so adorable when she arrived at my house this morning, all flustered and could barely look me in the eye.
It was a struggle to keep my hands to myself, but I managed a quick caress of her ass while walking by her when the kids weren’t looking. Her surprised expression was priceless.
I get to the arena in record time since it’s a Saturday and there’s no traffic. I park my car and whistle a tune to the song I was just listening to while walking to the dressing room.
“What’s up, fellas?” I greet the crew of guys who are in the locker room getting ready. I go straight to my stall, put my personal belongings away and start undressing. I’m pulling on my compression pants when I see Harry leaning against his stall door next to mine.
“You good?” he inquires, his gaze searching mine in question.
I give him a hesitant smile, confused as to why he’s looking at me so intently. “Yeah, why?”
He narrows his eyes at me. “Because we’re playing Kelowna tonight.”
I’ve been so distracted with my thoughts of Kiley that I actually forgot who our opponents were.
His concern is valid. Normally I’m so tightly wound up in fear that Jenna and Cal are going to show up that I play like absolute garbage.
But I can’t keep living in the past and need to face the fact that one day, I probably will see them at a game.
We broke up, she’s apologized multiple times and I feel that I’m healed enough to move on.
Things are going so well in my life right now, and I feel more grounded than ever.
I think having Chloe here with me has put things in perspective of what’s important and what’s not.
I shrug, trying to play it off that I hadn’t forgotten. “I’ve got to move on with my life and can’t let the past dictate who I am anymore.”
His jaw falls open in shock. “Who are you and what have you done with Jax Morrow?” He looks over my shoulder at Bishop. “Bishop, did you just hear this motivational shit?”
“Sure did, and it’s about fuckin’ time.”
“I’m not sure I’m buying this,” Kinner comes over, rubbing his chin. “Either he’s getting his schlong sucked off or he’s become a Buddhist monk.”
“Definitely not a Buddhist monk,” Nolan pipes up.
I shake my head. “You all need to try some self-reflection sometimes.”
“He’s totally getting BJs.”
I laugh while attaching my shoulder pads. “Not that it’s any of your business, but I haven’t had one of those in eight months.”
“You’re definitely getting laid.”
“Nope.”
“Whatever it is,” Beau interrupts, and gives Saint a warning look. “We’re happy to hear that you’ve moved on.”
I give him a small smile. “I appreciate that.”
Harry is still watching me with a skeptical smirk, but I ignore him and finish getting ready. But Harry is not one to let things go, and when we’re on the ice, he joins me while warming up.
“You and Kiley finally?”
I shake my head. “It’s not what you think.”
He scoffs. “So just physical?”
I nod, giving him a warning look to be quiet.
“Whatever makes you happy, man,” and he skates away.
Coach blows the whistle, and I refuse to worry about Harry’s disappointment in me. I know he’s trying to be a good friend and only wants the best for me, but my personal life shouldn’t be his concern. How I play hockey and help my team win should be top priority.
“Listen up, boys,” Coach calls out, and everyone quiets down and stands to attention.
“We have three games left before break. Two at home and one away. I know you’re tired and some of you are fighting through injuries and sickness, but every point is critical from here on out if we want to make the playoffs.
I need you to leave any personal shit outside of this rink and give me your all on the ice.
” He’s looking straight at me, and I nod in acknowledgement.
I can’t wait to prove to everyone who has been with me these four years that I’ve mentally moved on.
The game is tied 3-3, and Kelowna is on a power play. We were playing a pretty solid game until Cruz took a stupid holding penalty. Now with two minutes left in the third period, I feel the tide of desperation slowly rising.
Their center wins the face-off and drops it back to their winger, who takes a shot on goal.
Joey drops into a butterfly and saves it, the puck bouncing off his pads with a loud thump.
The puck spills out toward the boards near the corner.
Their left winger lunges for the loose puck, but Liam is on his ass and soon shoves him hard into the boards and glass.
The decibel level in the arena soars with the crowd going wild over that hit.
The winger collapses, freeing up the puck for Liam to pass.
I tap my stick on the ice to indicate I’m free at the blue line, and Liam flicks a wrist shot that lands beautifully on my blade.
I can hear the skates of the defenseman’s slashing through the ice, and I know I’m about to get knocked down from behind.
I quickly spin out, causing the defensemen to crash into the boards by himself.
I see Linc is open and ready to take off to try our chance at a shorthanded goal.
I pass him the puck and try to keep up, my lungs burning and my legs feeling heavy, but the adrenaline of winning this game at the last minute has me catching up, and it is now the two of us against their defensemen flying into their zone.
Linc passes me the puck, and I feign that I’m going to shoot the shot on goal, which causes the defensemen to go down to try to block it.
Instead, I flick the puck back over to Linc, who rips a shot high on their goalie’s glove side, sailing cleanly underneath the crossbar.
The red light goes on, and I throw my hands up in the air before slamming Linc into the boards for a celebratory hug.
The rest of the players swarm from the bench and tackle us.
Fans are banging against the glass where we congregate, and the arena is electric.
“Light that fucking lamp up, boys!” Liam screams over the music, patting both Linc and me on our helmets.
“That was fun,” Linc yells in my ear as we skate back to the bench. “Same time in seventy-two hours?” he jokes, referring to our next game.
I laugh. “Yes, but let’s try not to be on the penalty kill this time.
” I look up in the stands to where my seats are and can immediately spot Kiley and the kids due to the hot pink hat Chloe decided to wear in order for me to find them quicker.
Kiley is holding up Zander, and they’re cheering and clapping to our victory song.
I point to them, and the three of them frantically wave back.
Thirty seconds remain on the clock, and we watch our fourth line take the face-off and win, letting the clock run down until the final horn blares.
The three stars of the game are announced: Linc, Liam, and I wave to the fans when our names are acknowledged.
As soon as I get off the ice, I’m summoned by our PR team to do a quick post-game interview right in the tunnel.
Back in the locker room, the equipment manager is handing out beers, and players are shaking them up before opening to spray them everywhere.
While tonight’s game was a big win, some of these guys are acting like we just won the Cup.
I throw my jersey off and put it in the big laundry bin to get washed and walk over to my stall.
“Morrow, beer?” Tallis offers and I decline. I signal to the assistant equipment manager that I need a new water bottle, and he throws one at me. I down it within a minute.
The coaches come in, carrying our golden shovel. The golden shovel award is a post-game tradition where we hand out the shovel to those who we felt did the best job shoveling us out of a shit hole. Three players get it per night, and we then pass it around the next game.
Coach Donovan kicks it off with a speech of what we did right tonight and how we never gave up.
The three players who get the shovel tonight are me, Linc and Joey.
When it’s my turn to get the shovel, Coach Donovan says, “To Jax Morrow for setting up the game winning goal. You proved that you can overcome adversity, no matter how long it might take.”
Once the speeches are done, I quickly get undressed and hustle to the showers. I want to get dressed and get out of here since Kiley and the kids are waiting for me.
“We have a lot of celebrating to do tonight! Where we going, boys?” Hutch inquires as he steps into the shower.
“Morrow, you can’t bail on us tonight. We need to celebrate your big comeback,” Nolan tells me as I’m washing up.
I feel torn. Part of me does want to go out and have a nice dinner and some drinks with the guys, while the other part of me just wants to go home and be with Kiley and the kids. “I don’t know. I’m kind of tired,” I lie.
“Awe, the old man is worn down,” Cruz mocks. “Don’t be a pussy and come out with us.”
I step out of the shower and wrap a towel around my waist. “Let me just check that it’s cool with Kiley.”
“Whoa, I didn't know Kiley was your girlfriend?” Cruz asks with a confused look. “I thought she was just your nanny.”
I grit my teeth. “She is only my nanny.”
“Then why would you need her permission?”
“It’s called respect, Cruz. She’s the one watching my kid.” Her only plans after the game were being with me, but these jokers don’t need to know that.
He shrugs his shoulders. “I don’t need my wife’s permission to go out, so I don’t know why you think you need your nanny’s.”
I won’t be taking advice from the guy who cheats on his wife on every road trip he’s on. I don’t even bother responding and go straight to my stall to get dressed.
Ten minutes later, I walk out of the dressing room and find Kiley and the kids waiting outside with other wives and girlfriends. Zander is playing street hockey with some of the kids.
Kiley’s face lights up when she sees me, and it takes every last ounce of will power not to hug her. “Congratulations, Jax! That was an incredible game.”
“Dad, you did so well! And against Kelowna of all teams.”
Before I get the chance to respond, Harry comes up and throws his arm around my shoulder. “Ladies, wasn’t your guy spectacular tonight?” He’s looking straight at Kiley, who gives him an uncomfortable smile. I shrug his arm off my shoulder and glare at him.
“You’re still going out to eat with us to celebrate, right?” He looks me dead in the eye and raises his eyebrow in a challenge.
“You should go, Jax,” Kiley interjects. “You deserve to celebrate.”
“The nanny approves!” Harry claps my back. “See you at The Prime.” He turns to Chloe and Kiley. “It’s good to see you, ladies. Chloe, stop growing up so quickly.” And with that, he walks to his car to leave.
“I don’t have to go, Kiley.” I give her a knowing look, and she smiles.
“Go. You need to celebrate with the guys. It’s important to them.”
For someone who doesn’t know hockey very well, she’s very astute in that celebrating these kinds of games as a team are important. It’s part of the bonding process and makes us even stronger as the year goes on.
I turn to Chloe. “Are you okay if I go?”
“Yeah, I’m good.”
“Thanks, girls. Let’s grab Zander so you guys can get on the road.”
Zander didn’t want to leave, but after bribing him with ice cream back at home, he reluctantly stops playing and grabs Kiley’s hand.
I look for Jimmy and signal at him when he sees me. Jimmy has been walking Kiley and the kids out to the parking lot at night so I know they get to their car safely since sometimes I can’t do it myself. “They’re ready to go, Jimmy.”
Chloe gives me a hug. “Bye, Dad. See you in the morning.”
I hug both her and Zander and look at Kiley. “Text me when you get home.”
She nods. “Will do. Be safe, and I’ll see you later.”
“See you later.” I try hard to emphasize on the word “you” so she would get my drift about wanting alone time with her when I get home.
While I watch Jimmy escort them out, I pull my phone from my pocket and send Kiley a text.
Jax: Sleep in my room tonight. I’ll wake you up when I get home.
I hit send and slowly smile, knowing exactly how I plan on waking her up.