38. Max
MAX
Sunlight hit me before my alarm got the chance. For a split second, I didn’t know where I was. Then I caught her scent – that flowery warmth stuck to the sheets. Emma’s place.
She was still asleep, her arm slung over the pillow.
The sheet barely covered her hips, and her skin glowed in that first, gentle light.
I just lay there and watched her breathe – the soft rise and fall that made the whole world slow down.
I should’ve left for morning skate already, but I couldn’t bring myself to move yet.
My body felt heavy, quiet. Like the noise in my head had shut up for once.
I kissed her shoulder, pulled the sheet up over her, and eased myself out of bed.
She didn’t wake up, just sighed and shifted closer to the space I’d been in.
I sat up, grabbed my jeans and pulled them on.
My shirt had vanished. All I could find was this sweatshirt that was too small for me by a mile, so I left it and made my way downstairs.
No coffee in the house, of course, so tea it was.
Emma kept saying I’d learn to love it, but so far, no luck.
I sat at her kitchen table, mug in hand, surrounded by her life: open notebook, pen uncapped, essays with red marks everywhere.
For some reason, that hit me hard. Maybe because everything felt so much like her, and I realized I wanted in. Not just as a visitor, but for real.
The floor creaked, and when I looked up, she was in the doorway wearing my missing shirt, which fell past her thighs. Her hair was a mess, her eyes still a bit sleepy. She smiled and, honestly, that smile just stopped me cold.
“You’re up early,” she said, her voice low and husky.
“Practice,” I said. “Didn’t want to wake you.”
She came over, eyeing my mug. “You found the kettle.”
“Yeah. Nothing worth drinking, though.”
That earned a laugh – the sound of her fully awake now. Her fingers brushed my arm. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” I said, while standing up. “Better than okay.”
Her eyes held mine for a moment longer than usual, something warm and sure passing between us. “You’ll be late.”
“I know. I am going to need my shirt, though.”
She looked down, pretending to think it over. “You sure? It fits me better.”
“Emma.”
She grinned, then started unbuttoning, one by one, deliberately slow. “You could just stay,” she teased.
I leaned in and kissed her, slow and deep, letting her know I wished I could.
She pressed my shirt into my hands, her fingers lingering for a second longer than necessary. “Go win something.”
“Always,” I replied, pulling my shirt on, feeling her eyes on me the whole time. Then I kissed her again, quick and soft, the kind of kiss that said see you soon.
I stepped outside. Cold air stung, but I barely felt it. My muscles ached, but in a good way. I’d spent nights with other people, sure, but none had felt like this one.
* * *
Practice was brutal. Coach had us running neutral zone drills one after another, whistle screeching every time someone screwed up. My lungs burned, sweat stung my eyes, and every stop was half a second too slow. By the time it was over, my legs felt like they’d been replaced by concrete.
I dropped onto the bench, still half in my gear, rubbing my face like that’d somehow wake me up.
Most of the team had already bailed for the showers.
It was just me, Will, and Lewis hanging around.
Lewis was half-dressed, towel over his shoulder, humming something that sounded suspiciously like ‘Wonderwall’.
He was taping his stick for no reason. Will kept fussing with his laces.
“You good?” Lewis asked, looking up. “You’ve been quiet since we hit the ice. Even quieter than your usual brooding self.”
“I don’t brood,” I said, focusing way too hard on unlacing my skates.
Will snorted. “Right. You just stare off into space like you’re weighing the fate of the universe every time a drill goes wrong.”
“Maybe I’m just thinking about how not to murder you,” I said, deadpan.
He grinned, totally unbothered. “So… Emma?”
I looked up, sharp. “What about her?”
“Nothing,” Will said, quickly. “Just – Lewis thinks you’ve been lighter lately. Happier. I think you’ve been distracted as hell. So, we’re trying to figure out if you’re in love or in trouble.”
Lewis nodded, all serious. “Or both.”
I rolled my eyes, but I caught myself almost smiling. “You two are idiots.”
“Yeah,” Will said, “but we’re your idiots.”
Couldn’t help it – I laughed. I slumped back on the bench, gear still half on, rubbing my face. “It’s just… different with her,” I said before I could stop myself. “I keep thinking I’m gonna screw it up.”
Lewis stopped humming. He looked over. “You won’t. You’re better with her, man. Calmer. You used to come in here like you had a fight to pick with gravity. Now you just look… settled.”
Will grinned, grabbing his towel. “Settled. Big word for you, Lou.”
Lewis chucked a roll of tape at him, which Will dodged expertly.
“Anyway,” Will said, heading for the showers, “don’t overthink it, Finn. Just show up for her the way you do here. That’s the whole game.”
He was gone before I could answer. Lewis followed him a minute later.
The room got quiet again. Just the clink of skates somewhere down the hall, the buzz of the lights, and my shoulders aching. I sat there a while, staring at the scuffed-up floor, thinking about what Will had said.
Just show up for her the way you do here.
Simple. It stuck with me. I grabbed my phone and sent Emma a text.
You still up for dinner later? I’ll bring dessert.
I stared at the message for a second before hitting send.