Chapter 17
Chapter Seventeen
It’s been five days since I’ve seen Jake.
I wanted to go back to his house, to talk to him.
Comfort him. But whenever I try, I get stopped by my father’s goons.
And if it’s not by his goons, then by my Tío E’s.
Including my cousin Emilio who is a freaking teenager.
I shouldn’t be being told what I can and can’t do by a damn teenager.
“You can’t go, Jazzy,” my cousin says, as if reading my mind.
“And you’re not my father. Get out of my way, Emilio, before I hurt you,” I tell him.
The little shit laughs at me. Actually laughs at my threat. “Give it your best shot,” he says, tapping his chin.
I groan. I’m not a fighter. I never have been. But right now, I really want to wipe the smirk off my little cousin’s face. Taking a deep breath, I try to find some kind of inner peace. I will not punch my cousin.
“Move,” I tell him.
“Nope.” Emilio shakes his head.
Fine. He’s not going to move? I’ll up my threat level. Digging into my bag, I pull out the pistol I’ve still got in there from when I stormed into Jake’s office.
“Move or I will shoot you,” I tell Emilio.
“Damn, Jazzy, I’m impressed.” He points at the gun in my hand without bothering to move out of my way. “I really didn’t think you’d have it in you.”
“You think I won’t shoot you?” I ask.
Emilio shrugs. “I don’t know, but I’m still not going anywhere.”
“She might not shoot you, but I sure as fuck will.” Aurelio is now right behind Emilio in the open doorway of my parents’ house. Why is he even here?
“Go for it.” Emilio shrugs again.
“You’re fucking insane.” Aurelio shakes his head.
“I don’t want to interrupt whatever this is, but I do have someone to see. Excuse me. Hi, Jazzy. Nice to see you again,” Daniella says as she passes me.
Aurelio watches his sister as she disappears before turning back in my direction. “Where you going?”
“The Westmead funeral is today. I’m going to attend,” I tell him.
“You think that’s wise?” Aurelio asks.
“I don’t care if it is or isn’t. I’m going,” I say.
“I’ll take you.” My head snaps to my left, over to where my dad is standing in a black suit.
My eyes widen. “Really?”
“Yes.” He nods. “You’re not going alone, and I know you’re going to find a way to get out of this house and turn up there anyway. So let’s go.”
“Thank you.” I wrap my arms around my dad’s waist.
When I pull away, he looks down at the gun in my hand. “Is that mine?”
“Ah, yeah, I kind of borrowed it.” I force a grin.
My dad plucks the gun from my hand and passes it off to Emilio. “Put this in my office,” he says.
“Sure thing, Tío C.” Emilio walks past me. “Next time, shoot me,” he whispers.
I roll my eyes. Idiot is going to find himself in an early grave.
“There a reason you’re on my doorstep?” My dad looks to Aurelio.
“Yeah, my sister went in there. I’m just her driver.” He shrugs.
“Right.” My dad places his hand on my lower back. “Let’s get this over with,” he says.
I don’t say anything the entire drive to the church. I do notice the three cars trailing behind us, but I don’t mention them. I haven’t been allowed out of the house without an army of security since the day I snuck off to Jake’s.
Before we get out of the car, I turn to my dad. “Thank you for bringing me here.”
“You know there isn’t a single thing I wouldn’t do for you, Jazzy,” he says.
“I know.” I smile a little. “But I also know you are not a fan of Jacob’s.”
“He’s your friend, and he’s going to need you today. Even if he doesn’t know that yet.”
Jake is more than a friend, but I don’t say that. He’s always been more than just a friend. Right now, I need to show him that I’m not going anywhere. I know he doesn’t want me around, that he thinks it’s not safe for me to be close to him, but I don’t care. I want to be there for him.
Not that the asshole deserves it…
I shake that thought from my mind. I’m not here to relive the past. I’m here to support someone I love during one of the worst times in their life.
I know what it’s like to lose a parent. The death of my mother was bittersweet, because although I lost one parent, I gained another two.
My dad and Antonia. If my mother wasn’t sick, I doubt I ever would have met my dad. Not when I was a child anyway.
“You okay?” my dad asks.
“Yeah, it’s just… funerals are always so sad.” I sigh.
“They do tend to have that ambience,” Dad agrees.
I smirk, hiding the smile that wants to appear on my face. “Not the place for jokes.”
“Right. You go. I’ll be right here.” Dad sits in one of the first open pews when we enter.
My legs wobble as I continue down the aisle. The service hasn’t started yet. I can see the back of Jake’s head in the front row. As if he can sense me, he turns and his eyes connect with mine. I don’t stop until I’m sitting in the open spot beside him.
“What are you doing here?” he asks me.
“My best friend’s parents’ funeral? Wouldn’t miss it for anything.” I reach over and entwine my fingers with his. Resting our now-joined hands on my leg.
“You shouldn’t be sitting with me,” Jake whispers.
“Too bad. I’m not sitting anywhere else.”
His hand squeezes mine. His eyes are watery. I know this isn’t easy for him.
“I don’t want to make this day harder for you, Jacob. I just want to be here for you. Because I know if it were me, you’d do the same.”
“I’m an asshole. You cannot count on me to be there for you, Jazzy. I’ve already proven that,” he states.
“I know, but we all do stupid shit when we’re young. We’re moving on.” I’m moving on. Trying to, at least. I will find a way to get over the hurt and embarrassment. Because what we shared in that panic room wasn’t just sex, and I know Jake feels it too.
“You have always been too good for me.” Jake untangles his hand from mine. Then he wraps his arm around my shoulders and pulls me closer to him. His lips press against the side of my forehead. “Want to sneak off to the confessional?”
“Jacob Westmead, you are not seriously suggesting that we… you know. Here. Now,” I gasp.
“This service fucking sucks and it hasn’t even started. I’m tired of everyone telling me how fucking sorry they are. None of these assholes cared about my parents,” he says.
“I cared about them.”
“You care about everyone,” he counters.
He’s not wrong. I do tend to care about people easily. I never want anyone to hurt. Well, not most people. “That’s not true. I don’t care about the people who did this to them.”
“Thank you for coming,” Jake says. “You really shouldn’t have. You’re not supposed to be seen with me.”
“What kind of friend would I be if I didn’t show up?” I ask him.
“The kind I deserve.”
“True. But lucky for you, I’m not an asshole. So you’re stuck with me now.” I try to smile. “You know I’ll be here, for whatever you need.”
“What I need right now is you, in that confessional, without any panties on,” he whispers in my ear.
“My dad is in the back row watching us, by the way,” I tell him.
“Of course he fucking is,” Jake groans and shifts to the side, putting the tiniest bit of space between us. His arm drops from around my shoulder and I instantly miss the warmth of his body.
Jake picks up my hand, his fingers entwining with mine again, and then he rests our joined palms on his thigh. His thumb strokes absentmindedly back and forth across my knuckles. I don’t ever want him to stop touching me.
The entire church goes silent and the priest begins his service. When it comes time for Jake to stand and speak, he looks at me. I can tell he doesn’t want to go up there.
“You can do this,” I tell him quietly. “I know you can.”
“I don’t think I can,” he says.
“Yes, you can.”
Slowly, Jake stands. But he doesn’t let go of my hand. He looks down, reluctantly lets go, and makes his way up to the altar.
“My parents, they were good people. Really good people. My father taught me everything I know about life, about business and relationships. My mother, she was the light of our home. She loved unconditionally and hard.” Jake stops and stares at me.
“She told me once that when you find love, don’t waste it.
Don’t let it go, because she thought everyone should experience a love like she had with my father.
She wanted to make the world a better place.
And I suppose, through all of her philanthropic work, she did.
She helped so many people over the years, just like she helped me to be the man I am today. ”
When he finishes his speech, Jake comes right back and sits next to me. He grabs for my hand without me having to offer it this time. His uncle speaks next, and then some other people I don’t know.
When the service is over, I push to my feet. “I’m going to go sit with my dad while you greet everyone,” I tell Jake.
He looks like he wants to say something, but he doesn’t.
Instead, he nods and walks towards the doors.
I watch him stand next to his uncle, shaking hands with everyone who exits the church, accepting condolences as they go.
I can see the pain on his face, and all I want to do is hug him and tell him that everything will be okay.