Chapter 17
Chapter Seventeen
Brian STEPPED off the practice court, grabbed the towel dangled in his direction and wiped the sweat from his face.
For a light shoot-around, practice had seemed hard to him.
He couldn’t imagine how he was going to feel for the game that night.
The groan inside him almost escaped. They had a West Coast road trip coming up next week.
They needed a couple of wins now before they left.
“Hey Brian, you looked pretty rough out there again today. How’s your daughter doing?” a reporter asked as he made his way to the locker room. It was about the millionth time he’d heard a variation of that comment followed by a variation of that question.
He turned to face the reporters. He wondered if he looked as tired as he felt.
“Lindy’s okay. She’s progressing as the doctors expected.
But she’s still hurting. Same as before.
” He’d said nearly the same words dozens of times a day every day for what seemed like forever now.
Telling too many people who didn’t really care.
He felt like telling them all to go to hell, but he didn’t.
Instead, he whipped the towel down from around his neck and pushed through the locker room door, listening to the rest of the questions fired at his back without bothering to answer them.
He changed and showered in record time. Without thinking. It was the only way he could function anymore. He blasted out the side door of the gymnasium into the parking lot, shivering in the bitter cold of the New Year’s Eve day.
As he hurried to unlock the door of his black Caddy with his bare frozen fingers, he heard the crunch of footsteps behind him and swore under his breath. He was about to turn and lay into whichever reporter it was, when Dave spoke.
“Jesus, you’re in a hurry. Where the hell you going? Got a hot date with Roxanne?” Dave stood waiting for his answer.
“It’s fucking cold out here. Get in the car, will you?” Brian felt relief that it was Dave. He realized suddenly that he needed to talk. He needed to do more than talk, but he pushed those thoughts to the back of his mind in the same corner as Roxanne.
“What’s up? Dave asked as he settled into the roomy seat and rubbed his gloved hands together. Brian started the car to let it warm up and faced his friend.
“I haven’t seen Roxanne. Or Lindy. Since Christmas.”
“Yeah? What the hell’s going on? If you haven’t seen either of them, then there’s no damned excuse for your fucking poor performance at practice. What gives?” Dave didn’t even bother trying to mask his concern.
“I’m not sure. I don’t think it’s such a hot idea for me to see either of them.
Roxanne’s trouble—and getting worse all the time.
And Lindy, well to tell you the truth Dave, she needs more than I can give her.
Maybe she’d be better off with Paul Paris.
At least they know each other. And I don’t know what the hell I’m doing.
” He pushed his fingers through his cold wet hair. That was an understatement.
“Is this some kind of cop-out?” Dave challenged.
Brian had asked himself the same question many times.
But he loved his daughter. That much he was sure of.
The rest—how to be a parent—that was a mystery.
And she needed someone now, someone capable and ready to say the right things to her, to comfort her.
Paul seemed to be able to do that. Hell, they’d lived under the same roof for five years.
“Yeah. Maybe it is,” he told his friend. “Look, I love Lindy, but I’ve never been a father to her. I’m more like her uncle, always have been. And I don’t know how to change that right now.” Brian stared ahead. He blew his warm breath onto his icy fingers.
“Have you mentioned this to your lawyer?”
“No. He’s a friend of Roxanne’s and she’d crucify me if I backed off the custody suit. Not that I should care what she thinks. But I do.”
“So what are you going to do?”
“Play basketball. It’s the only damned thing I know how to do.” He looked at his friend and Dave shook his head.
“And what about Roxanne?”
“Forget her. I’d like to see her and screw her till I drop.” He heard the wistful note in his own voice. He could almost smell her. Brian shook the thought from his mind.
Dave laughed. “What you need is another woman. If I’m not mistaken, that’s frustration I hear. Why don’t you let me fix you up with someone?”
“When?”
“Tonight.”
“You’re on.”
When Brian arrived home, he found his cell phone and several more messages from Roxanne. She’d been calling him for four days. He decided he finally better call her back. At least he knew what to tell her now.
He tapped her number and let it ring four times. As he was ready to click off, he heard her voice.
“I got your messages.” His voice was tight. He forced himself to relax. Sinking back into the plump cushions of his couch, he put his feet up and stretched out. Twirling an unlit cigarette between his fingers, he waited.
“Yeah. I gather from your overwhelmingly quick response that you’d rather I keep this call short.” She paused. But he didn’t bother to correct her impression. If she even wondered why he hadn’t called for days, she didn’t show she cared.
“I need some money for the fund. There’ve been some problems.” Her tone was clipped and cool. Professional. More so than usual when she talked shop.
And it burned him up. Anger flamed in him so that he thought he actually felt its heat in his face. He ought to calm himself, think before he said anything. He exploded.
“You fucking call me day and night for days and it’s all because you want my fucking money? What the hell do you think I am?” What the hell was he? Was he supposed to go on being a machine, churning out money and playing basketball until there was nothing else left?
There was silence for what seemed like forever on the other end of the line while Brian waited, strung taut.
“I don’t know what you are. That’s for you to decide. All I know is the game is off. As of right now. And I need $750,000 for Dr. Oki’s fund. Now. Today.” Her words were colder than cool this time. Hostile.
And the game was off. The slam to his gut couldn’t have felt more real than a jab from Ali himself.
The stinging started and he could tell it wasn’t about to let up.
What did he do now? What did he say now?
He’d wanted to end it with her himself, hadn’t he?
She was doing him a favor, even if it felt like she was kicking the shit out of him.
“You can have the money. See me after the game tonight.” He pressed the end button and tossed the phone. Even if he’d won the game by default there was no mistaking the sound of defeat in his voice.
The answer was yes. He was supposed to go on churning out money and playing basketball. Like a machine. Because that’s all he was capable of.
He sure as hell wasn’t capable of handling Roxanne. He thought about that and as it sunk into his brain that he was admitting defeat, the phone rang. He sprung up to retrieve it, surprised that his first reaction was to hope it was her again.
But it wasn’t Roxanne.
“Mr. Dennis, this is Dr. Oki at Children’s Mercy Hospital. I’m calling about Lindy. We have to schedule her for a final radical skin grafting operation and we’d like to do it next week. When can you come in to discuss it?”
The doctor’s words added a nauseating feeling to his already bruised gut, which Brian thought might make him physically ill if he didn’t do something quick. He stood. Swiping at the sweat on his brow, he spoke into the phone with a shaky voice and snapped the cigarette held in his fingers in half.
“Doc, is she going to be okay?”
“We think so. But this is a difficult thing to go through for the patient. It’s very painful. To optimize the outcome it would be a good idea for you to come in and see her, talk to her…”
He wondered irrationally if Roxanne had put him up to this. Then he remembered his schedule.
“I won’t be around next week. We have a road trip to the West Coast for two weeks. Can you possibly postpone this?”
“It’s possible. Can you come in now for a conference? We’ll talk about the schedule. Mr. Paris will be here, as will Lindy’s maternal grandparents. The plans must be agreeable to everyone. We are at a crucial stage in her treatment where family involvement becomes most important.”
Brian hesitated to frame the question that was on his mind. He wanted to ask if Roxanne would be there too. Then he decided of course she wouldn’t be. She wasn’t family.
“I’ll be there. I have to go to the bank anyway. Looks like you guys are running low on money.” He strived for a light note but he wasn’t sure why he’d say something like that to Dr. Oki.
“Brian, we here at the hospital are all very grateful for your generosity, especially the other children and their parents.”
“Sure, Doc. It’s nothing. Glad to do it. Really. See you in an hour.” He signed off. The sweat coated his face in a light film. The fury simmered just below the surface. Roxanne made him insane with her demands. But he couldn’t exactly blame this on her.
He didn’t look forward to confronting either Paul Paris or his ex-in-laws. But the thought of seeing Lindy suddenly didn’t seem as daunting as it had. He would go and talk to her and sign whatever forms they had for him and get out.
Tonight he could be back to himself again.
Playing basketball. He headed for the garage, grabbing his jacket.
Maybe Lindy would watch his game tonight.
The thought buoyed him. It was a new sensation.
He smiled until he got behind the wheel and his thoughts turned back to the business at hand. The bank. Roxanne.
***