Chapter 10 #2
But now, hell. My discomfort, that unsettled feeling, was too acute. I felt exactly like I was between a rock and a hard place. The contest between my love life and football could squeeze the life out of me if I let it. If I didn’t settle it.
“That’s not all there is to it. Besides, it’s not that simple to ditch Denise.”
Hunter turned back to me. Ready to listen, thought he didn’t look happy.
“I have feelings for Mia, Denise’s best friend.” I paused, waiting for the implication to sink in, waiting for Hunter to realize it was his turn to talk.
“What’s the big deal?”
“The deal is, aside from the fact that it would be a massive betrayal to Denise, a person who, say what you want about her, is someone I care about. Mia isn’t the kind of woman I can date casually.”
“Neither is Denise, but that didn’t stop you.”
“This is different. I could keep Denise at arm’s length, but Mia . . .”
“You don’t want Denise and Mia is off-limits?”
I nodded.
“You are in fucking trouble. This is messed up. But take it from me, don’t try and hide how you feel. You need to come clean with Denise.”
I nodded my head, knowing this was true.
All this time I’d felt like she was stringing me along, moving away and expecting me to be okay with it, I’d been the one who was stringing her along.
Because neither of us wanted a long-distance romance.
And I sure as hell didn’t want to marry her.
We both knew there was nothing in between.
“Yeah. It’s about time I cut her loose.” I stared into my beer again. Hunter stayed quiet, letting me mull while his solid presence kept me on track, kept me honest. No more deluding myself.
I said, “We’ve been together a long time, man. It’ll be hard.”
He nodded as if he knew. And even though I knew he’d never had a long-term relationship with a woman until Cat, somehow he had the wisdom.
“If you know of any magic words, speak up,” I said, lifting the beer and draining it.
“No magic, but I’d suggest the Band-Aid approach. One quick rip. She may scream, but it’ll be over quicker.”
I shouldn’t have wanted to laugh at that, but I did in spite of the sick feeling in my gut. In the end, I realized it would be better for both of us. I’d warned her from the beginning that football came first. She’d thought she could change my mind.
“Denise deserves better,” I said into my empty beer mug.
Hunter nodded. We agreed, but it would be a tough sell to Denise, explaining why being engaged or married to me would be a bad thing. That I really wasn’t going to change. At least not for her. I tossed the notion of changing, along with the image of Mia in my head, aside.
Denise was smart and sensible and I was counting on that. I would be kind and gentle, but firm. She was tough. I was counting on that too. I truly hoped in the end we could be friends.
“You going to call her tonight?” Hunter asked. I snapped my head around to gape at him.
“Tonight? I’ve barely wrapped my own head around ending our relationship. I doubt I’d be able to sell it to her right now.”
“Don’t wait too long.”
“No, but I’ll need to do it in person. She deserves that much at least. I’ll fly down even if it’s just for a day.”
“You going to ask Coach for a day off?”
“No. We’ll have a day coming soon.”
He grunted and shook his head.
“I’m not procrastinating. I need to . . . get used to the idea of not having her.”
Hunter looked at me funny.
“What?”
“Maybe you are in love with her?”
“Not like that. More like someone you’ve gone through things with, done some growing up together. Not enough to build a marriage on. Believe me. I know what kind of commitment that takes. My mom and dad are good examples.”
I immediately regretted the words, reminding Hunter of his parents. When he lost his father a few years back he’d found out that his old man had a second family in Alaska that he hadn’t mentioned to Hunter’s mother—or to Hunter.
“Sorry, man. I didn’t mean to—”
“No worries. I don’t begrudge you having awesome parents,” he said. But the way his face shut down I knew he wasn’t over the devastation of his father’s betrayal. Not completely.
“Most of all,” I said, “I don’t know when or if I’d ever be ready for that kind of commitment to a woman.
But I know it’s not now. Or anytime soon.
” That’s what scared me the most about ending it with Denise.
I’d be vulnerable to the temptation of Mia.
And that would be no good. Because I didn’t want to hurt her.
And I didn’t want to let go of my commitment to football.
“That right there is your problem,” Hunter said. He took his last sip of beer.
“Tell me about it.” I stood. I’d indulged enough time and energy on this emotional crap. What I really needed to do was throw all my energy into football where it belonged. But I had no intentions of being a monk. Surely I could find a woman who was okay with a casual relationship in this town.
“Does Cat have any friends who are decent human beings and yet commitment-phobic?”
He laughed. “I know she has some hot friends.”
“That’s a start.” I smiled because he was a good friend. Not because I felt okay about anything else right now.
That wasn’t a good sign. Because in spite of Tate’s injury, the team was jelling well and the prospects for our repeat looked better than fifty-fifty.
That there should be cause enough for a big fat grin.
Focus, Wyatt. Focus on what matters. Football, family, and friends.
In that order. Maybe a lady friend at some point.
As I drove Hunter back to his car, my mind attempted to wander back to Mia, trying to fit her into the friend category, trying to keep her away from the lady friend category, and I had to shut it down, kill all thoughts of her. Purge her, Wyatt. Do it now.
Hunter got out of my car almost before I stopped, then leaned down at the open door. I wasn’t sure he was going to talk. He wasn’t a big talker.
But then he said, “Maybe you should try being friends with Mia. See how that works.” He slammed the door closed, slapped the hood, and took off.
There hadn’t been enough light to read the expression on his face, but I could swear he sounded serious, or tried to.
But it wasn’t like him to give advice. Plus, it was the worst advice I’d ever heard.
He was not a people person. That was my specialty.
And I knew better. There was no friendship zone for me and Mia, I now knew.
But you could try. See how that goes.