Chapter 29 One of Your Boobs is Staring at Me
Chapter twenty-nine
One of Your Boobs is Staring at Me
Jo
After not being able to sleep at all, I’m out of bed, showered, and dressed all before the sun is up. I even manage to make it out of the house before anyone else has woken up.
Thank God. I’m too much of a mess to deal with them right now. I love Dylan and Leah, but neither of them are who I need to talk to right now.
As I walk through the streets of Lilly Leaf Falls, I reflect on everything that happened last night. I basically yelled at Beau and challenged him to kiss me.
He did, and…holy shit.
Fireworks.
And then, we fucked on the hood of a car. Just thinking about it gets my lady bits all tingly.
It all happened so fast, and I didn’t have time to think or process any of it. Even if I did have time, I still probably would’ve skipped right over the thinking part. That’s kind of my thing.
And that’s what always seems to get me in trouble.
While I could continue to beat myself up, I know that’s not very productive. I need a second opinion. I need someone who will tell it like it is and who also has a string of crazy decisions under her belt.
When I reach my destination, I knock on the door. When it opens, my sister’s very confused boyfriend stares back at me.
“I need to talk to Ronnie,” I tell him.
Drew looks me up and down. “She’s still in bed.”
“That’s okay. I know where it is,” I reply while ducking around him.
He stands there with his mouth open, unsure if he wants to try to stop me. To ensure he doesn’t, I hightail it straight to their bedroom.
When I get there, I sneak inside, quietly closing the door behind me. I kick off my shoes before crawling on the bed until my face is a couple inches from my sister’s.
“Veronica,” I whisper.
Nothing.
“Ronnie,” I whisper again, this time a little louder.
Still nothing. This woman sleeps like the dead.
I resort to plugging her nose and giving a loud, “Veronica!”
She jumps up like she’s been shot. It takes her a second to comprehend what’s going on while she turns on the light.
“Jo?”
“No, it’s the ghost of Christmas past. Yes, it’s Jo!”
“Why are you in my bed?”
“I need to talk to you.”
“Can’t it wait?” She asks.
“Nope, so put your listening ears on.”
Completely irritated, she yanks the blanket off of her top half. I look down, and my eyes go wide.
“Uh, Ronnie. One of your boobs is staring at me.”
She looks down to adjust her shirt.
“With these titties, going to bed with no bra and a tank top, this is bound to happen. And you busted into my bedroom, so you have to accept that you may be greeted by my boobs.”
“Hey, no complaints here. I’m totally envious of your knockers.”
Just as I’m uttering those words, Drew comes walking in. He moves toward Ronnie and hands her a huge cup of coffee. “Figured you could use this.”
She smiles. “You’re a godsend.”
I look at him. “Not going to say anything about me talking about Ronnie’s knockers?”
“No, I am not. Jo, do you want some coffee too?”
“No thanks. I’ve already had a Red Bull.”
He nods and walks back out.
“Okay, Jo. Why are you in my bed at the ass crack of dawn?”
I blurt, “I had sex with Beau.”
She chokes on the sip of coffee she just took. “What? I thought he hated you.”
“Yeah, me too. We got into a fight at the dance. I went to the shop to see what was shoved up his ass. We fought some more. He confessed he was in love with me, and we fucked on the hood of a Thunderbird.”
Her mouth hangs open. “That sounds like something I would do.”
“I know! But now, I’m wondering if it was a huge mistake.”
Her nose crinkles. “Was it awful?”
“No, actually, it was pretty fucking incredible.”
“So, what’s the problem? He doesn’t hate you, and you got your jollies off.”
I love my sister, but sometimes, she sees things a little too black and white.
“Ronnie, Beau said he loved me, and instead of talking it out or dealing with it, I just invited him to the party between my thighs.”
“Okay, well, did you talk afterward?”
“Not exactly.”
“What the hell does that mean?”
“Well, we finished, and both of us kind of just stammered. I think we were in disbelief that it just happened, and we decided we would get together tonight to talk.”
“What are you going to say?”
“I don’t know! Why do you think I’m in your bed right now?”
“Okay, calm down, Miss Dramatic.”
“Ronnie, come on. I really need your help.”
After taking a large sip of coffee, she sets her mug on the bedside table. “What do you want to say to him?”
I think for a moment. “Lots of things.”
“Do you want to be with him?”
“I’ve never thought about it.”
“Really? In all the time you spent together, you never even considered it?”
“Ronnie, we’ve already gone over this.”
She runs her fingers through her messy hair. “I know, but maybe I think you’re full of shit. Or maybe you’re just not being honest with yourself.”
“Ronnie,” I begin. “I never let myself think about Beau like that. He was the one relationship I had that wasn’t completely dysfunctional and fucked up. I was terrified to ruin that.”
“Why do you think you’d ruin it?” She asks.
“Because I know myself. I have an extreme knack for ruining things either by doing something stupid, picking the wrong person entirely, or running away when I get scared.”
“Okay, now hear me out. What if you don’t do any of those things?”
“You make it sound so easy.”
“Why isn’t it? Answer me this–do you care about Beau?”
“Yeah. And coming back here reminds me just how much.”
“Do you love him?”
My eyes fall to my lap. I do think there’s part of me that loves Beau. The trouble is that I’m not sure I’ve ever really been in love before, so I have nothing to compare it to.
My sister senses my hesitation and changes course.
“Okay, here’s what I think. I think that you’ve had a really bad track record with assholes.
Beau is one of the good ones. Maybe you should give him a chance.
He’d be good for you. All of that being said, I think you two need to have a real conversation.
You need to get everything out in the open.
Everything. I know you have never wanted to discuss why you left town, but I think it’s time you tell Beau.
He deserves the truth, whatever it may be. ”
I nod because I know she’s right. Even though it’s not a conversation I want to have, it’s one I need to.
She adds, “And if you do decide to give the Beau thing a chance, you need to go into it differently than you have before because he’s not like those assholes.”
“Ronnie, I have no idea what I’m doing.”
“I know. But you’ll be fine. I had no idea what I was doing when I got with Drew, but somehow, it worked out.”
We both go silent for a moment, and I decide to lighten the mood.
Looking down at her chest where her boobs are threatening to bust out again.
“Are those things heavy to carry around?” I joke.
She looks down. “You have no idea.”