Chapter 24 - Luke
Sleep evades me most of the night, as almost every minute I don’t have Sera in bed with me feels more like torture than just distance.
Regardless of only being a floor apart, the bond feels colder than usual, pulled tight enough to make me feel like I could snap at any point.
Just after dawn, I sense her getting up before I do, and outside, I feel the morning patrol begin. The usual routine continues, whether I’m ready or not.
She avoids me even into the morning, and as much as I want to cut the space, I don’t out of respect for her. I’ve done enough already by trying to force everything into place how I want it.
Outside, the air is cool while the sun stays hidden behind heavy clouds, only worsening my mood as I try to go through the motions.
The others greet me when our paths cross, but I catch their slight hesitation and caution, like they don’t know how to decipher my current state. In all honesty, I don’t know how to either.
Many of them just want to appease me and follow my lead, but enough of them are questioning me and my ability to lead. It doesn’t need to be said for me to feel it.
“Perimeter’s clear,” Isaac says as he approaches me through the trees with Dominic in tow. The two of them have been volunteering themselves as night patrol leaders, and in a way, it has turned into a loose kind of mentorship for when I get pulled away.
“Any signs of Wraith Peak?”
Dominic shakes his head. “Nah, nothing fresh.”
That’s good, at least. It’s a small victory, but I’ll take it.
Despite the more positive note, Isaac’s expression turns more uneasy. “I heard a few guys talking during the night.”
I deflate a little. “What did they say this time?”
“They mentioned how the tension is destabilizing things, and they’re worried the other Alphas might sense weakness. If not them, then Dawson will.”
My spine locks at that word. Destabilizing. That’s exactly what Voss said the day he tried to get Sera back.
Irritation flares beneath my skin at the thought, but I shove it aside and try to steady myself. I refuse to allow him that satisfaction in any capacity.
Exhaling, I rub at my temple. “Just one night…that’s all I ask.”
“I think leadership under pressure shows what it’s made of,” Dominic says, but his optimistic spin doesn’t land as intended.
“They say friction is good,” Isaac adds, offering me a small, reassuring smile.
“Friction is all I’ve had for weeks,” I mutter, well aware that I’ll still trudge on regardless.
“And it’ll clear up soon. Just give it time,” Dominic says, clapping my shoulder with a hand.
Time…as if I haven’t been relying on it heavily as is.
When they finish giving me the rundown, I head toward the wharf to speak to a few others when I spot Dad getting out of his truck, surely preparing to sink even more time into his businesses in preparation for the busy season ahead.
From a distance, I catch his eye, and while I half expect him to wave or at least nod in my direction, he doesn’t do either. Instead, he holds my gaze with that unreadable expression before continuing.
It throws me enough to stop me in my tracks, forced to unravel everything that one glance seemed to say without any words at all.
The doubt is loud and clear, just like the others.
As he predicted before, he thinks I’m losing control. I chose her when he warned me not to, I refused to bend, and I put my mate above appeasing everyone else, and now, I’m facing the consequences.
But consequences be damned, this isn’t over.
***
When I find Sera at the house, sitting in the living room with an untouched cup of tea in front of her, the bond feels bruised in a way, but I force myself to ignore it for now.
“We need to talk,” I start, pulling her attention to me.
The exhaustion in her eyes mirrors mine, but it hurts so much more to see it on her.
She takes a moment before she murmurs, “You look like you didn’t sleep.”
“I didn’t,” I answer, not seeing any point in lying about it. “And neither did you.”
She doesn’t deny it, since we both know it’s true.
Silence settles for a beat too long before I start, feeling far too raw and open, but I can’t hide it now. “I don’t know what, but something has to give.”
Her brows furrow, quietly watching me while she mulls over the words. “And by that you mean…?”
“Even if they don’t say it outright, the pack won’t put their complete faith in me, and my dad is one more slip-up away from pointing out everything I’ve gotten wrong.”
While Sera’s gaze doesn’t exactly soften, I catch how she falters slightly. “I never wanted to be the wedge.”
“You’re not,” I admit, running a hand through my hair with a tired, bitter exhale. “That wedge has been there since before I was old enough to become the Alpha.”
“But I haven’t exactly made it any better,” she insists, voice steady despite her exhaustion. “And with you trying to fight everyone at once, it isn’t helping.”
My jaw clenches as the tension that has been simmering all morning starts to rise again, quicker and more demanding. “Because they’re wrong.”
“You aren’t getting anywhere because you’re treating this like war,” Sera throws back at me, matching my frustration. “You’re pushing against them, your dad, and tradition. You’re trying so hard to prove something, and rather than your partner, you’re treating me like your cause.”
Every claim catches me off guard, caught in temporary silence while emotion shines in her eyes.
“I don’t want to be the thing you defend at the expense of everything else just because you feel guilty for dragging me into this,” she continues, hitting that sensitive place far harder than I expect from her. “I want to help build this with you, not be the reason you lose it.”
“I don’t care about losing it,” I say before I can stop the pressure from giving way.
When her expression shifts, as if I’ve startled her, I take a step forward, feeling raw now.
“I don’t care about the title more than I care about you or the baby.
If someone challenges me because I chose you, then I’ll fight like hell, but if I lose, I lose. ”
Her brows pinch in disbelief. “Luke—”
“I need you,” I spill out, voice wavering in a way I never allow it to in front of anyone else. “More than I need the pack’s approval, and more than I need my father’s respect.”
Even when she doesn’t say anything as the stunned silence consumes her, I move closer until I’m kneeling and reaching for her hand.
“I can’t keep feeling this distance between us,” I continue, well aware that this can’t stay locked up a moment longer.
“I know I’m to blame for your pain, and I know I’ve already pushed everyone beyond their limits.
I have no right to ask this of you, but I want you to choose this with me. To work with me on this.”
Sera’s eyes search mine, surely searching for potential dishonesty or a trap, but I don’t have either.
“I want you by my side regardless of what happens. I want to raise our child in a way that feels right to both of us, not just to follow tradition, or how I’ve decided without your input,” I tell her, gently stroking my thumb against the back of her hand.
“I’ve made a lot of this worse in some ways, and I’ve mishandled myself, but I can’t stand the thought of you hating me for it, or feeling trapped with me. ”
“I don’t hate you,” she says, tone softer now as she swallows hard. “I’m overwhelmed.”
“So am I, even if I don’t say it,” I murmur, hating how weak that admission makes me feel despite knowing it needs to be said.
It hangs between us before I exhale. “I’m asking you to choose me, and to fight for this with me, not against me.
Even when it’s hard and overwhelming, and even if you’re so mad at me you don’t even want to look at me… I need to know you’re with me.”
Sera blinks some of the emotion back, taking the time to gather her words. A light, humorless sound escapes her. “You’re asking a lot from someone who doesn’t know the first thing about this.”
“It doesn’t matter…we’ll figure it out,” I say gently, eyes solely on her. “No part of me is willing to drop this. Not the pack, you, or the baby, but I can’t keep pretending this will all work out if I keep pressing as hard as I can.”
She studies me closely for a long moment, then a spark of guilt settles in her expression. “I don’t want you to lose your Alpha status because of me.”
Taking a breath, I allow myself to breathe a little easier as the tension ebbs into something quieter and more receptive. “If someone challenges me, it won’t be because of you.”
Sera watches as my thumb continues its light path across her skin, then her shoulders relax into a less guarded position. “I need time.”
As much as the thought of leaving any of this unsettled doesn’t sit right with me, I have to respect it for her sake. Carefully, I stand without letting go of her hand.
“I’m not asking for an answer today…I just don’t want you to give up on us.”
As the fight drains out of us both, leaving that same exhaustion behind, her eyes soften. “I haven’t.”
While it isn’t the full reassurance I was hoping for, it’s enough hope to stop me from falling apart completely.
With another steadying breath, I slowly reach forward and cup her cheek in a light hold. The contact sends a spark of warmth up my arm, keeping me balanced. “I’m going to do a perimeter check to clear my head…I’ll be back soon.”
As much as I want to kiss her and make all of this lingering static go away, I don’t want to undo everything I’ve just laid out between us. Besides, we both need space to decompress now.
So, when she nods, I gently withdraw and head for the door.
The pressure is still there, but I have resolved to choose her fully without compromise, even if her mind isn’t completely made up yet.
When I imagine the alternative, of her looking at me with resentment and regret, wishing she could be as far away from me as possible, I know there’s no contest.
I will lay everything down if it means feeling her heart at ease, even if it makes me the worst Alpha on the island.