Chapter 12
CHAPTER
TWELVE
MONROE
Sleep didn’t come any easier after talking to Clay but at some point I did fall asleep.
I woke up later than normal to the smell of fresh coffee and bacon frying downstairs in the kitchen.
Shit.
I hadn’t meant to oversleep and I was surprised that Kaleigh hadn’t barreled into my room to wake me.
Not wanting to make Clay any later for work, I quickly climbed out of bed and changed my clothes. I made a pit stop in the bathroom to handle my business and brush my teeth, thankful that for right now, I wasn’t feeling an ounce of morning sickness.
When I got downstairs, Clay was standing at the kitchen island in just a pair of shorts and sipping his coffee while Kaleigh sat on one of the chairs, chomping on some bacon. Of course Maverick was right beside her, drool dripping from his jowls as he waited for her to drop a piece.
Meanwhile, I tried not to drool over how good Clay looked with his shirt off, those tattoos on his arms on full display.
“Monring,” Clay said softly.
I smiled. "Morning."
His eyes swept over me quickly before settling back on my face. "You sleep okay?"
I opened my mouth to answer, but Kaleigh beat me to it.
"She didn't."
I blinked.
Clay looked at his daughter. "Kaleigh."
"What?" she asked innocently, shoving a piece of her waffle into her mouth. "She was awake last night. I could hear her talking. Both of you."
My cheeks heated. "Oh, Kaleigh-girl..."
Clay's eyes flicked toward me.
For a second, I wondered if he was worried she’d heard too much.
But then Kaleigh shrugged and went back to her breakfast like she hadn’t just casually announced she’d been eavesdropping.
"Kids are supposed to sleep," Clay said.
“I was sleeping.”
“You just said you heard us talking.”
She narrowed her eyes at him. "Daddy."
I had to bite my lip to keep from laughing. The expression on Clay's face was priceless.
"What?"
"You and Monwoah are being weird."
Clay cleared his throat. “What do you mean, we’re being weird?” he asked before taking another drink from his mug.
Kaleigh looked between us like the answer was obvious. "You keep looking at each other funny."
He nearly choked on his coffee while I stood there, wide-eyed and in shock. “We are not,” he finally spat out.
“Are to.” She glanced over at me.
I looked away, suddenly very interested in the coffee maker on the counter.
Four-year-olds were terrifying. Especially when they were right.
“And you were talking quietly last night. Like when you don't want me to hear.”
Oh I wished the world would swallow me up whole, right now because unfortunately, she was also right about that.
Clay opened his mouth, closed it, then looked completely defeated. "Eat your breakfast."
Kaleigh grinned. "That means I'm right."
I couldn't stop the laugh that escaped.
Clay looked over at me. And there it was again. That smile. The one that wasn’t fake or guarded. The one that made my chest hurt in ways I didn’t want to think about because it was so damn rare for Clay to grin like that.
“I swear, she’s trouble,” he muttered under his breath.
“I’m pretty sure she gets that from you,” I said, trying not to start laughing again.
His brows lifted and he scoffed. “Beg your pardon.”
“Admit it, Wilder. She gets it from you.”
He smiled again. “I admit nothing.” Then he turned around, picked up a plate of food that was sitting next to the stove and handed it to me. “Eat while it’s still warm.”
I sat down next to Kaleigh but kept watching Clay closely. “I didn’t make you late for work, did I?”
He shook his head. “I’ve got the day off. Needed to take care of some things around the house.”
“Clay,” I sighed.
I hated feeling like I needed to apologize, again, for everything.
“Don’t. I know what you're thinking."
My brows pulled together. "You do?"
"Yeah." He leaned against the counter, crossing his arms over his chest. "You're that I took the day off to keep an eye on you two.” The look he was giving me now, said he was choosing his words carefully because Kaleigh was sitting right there.
“You’re not?”
“You mean, I didn’t take the day off so that you two couldn’t sneak off and get a milkshake without me?” He winked. “Oh I absolutely did.”
“Milkshakes!” Kaleigh squealed.
“Later, kiddo. Maybe after lunch.”
“This time, Mavy needs his own so he doesn’t steal my whipped cream,” Kaleigh huffed.
“Of course he does.” Clay rolled his eyes and pointed at me. “That is all you.”
“How was I supposed to know he really liked whipped cream?” I feigned innocence.
“I took the day off because I wanted to.”
“Because of me.”
“Because of my family.”
My heart skipped a beat.
Clay seemed to realize what he'd said, but instead of backtracking, he doubled down.
"You and Kaleigh are my priority."
Before I could figure out what to say, Kaleigh gasped dramatically.
"I knew it!"
Both of us turned toward her. She pointed between us with a triumphant smile. "You’re being weird again."
Clay looked toward the ceiling like he was asking for patience before looking back at her. “Kaleigh, go brush your teeth and get dressed.”
“Whatever you say…weirdo!”
That time, Clay just shook his head. “I can’t win.”
“You should probably stop trying,” I added.
Once she was out of earshot, Clay moved closer and rested a hand on my shoulder. The simple touch nearly undid me because there was no hesitation on his part. No uncertainty. No second guessing.
"Are you sure you're okay?"
I held back the sob that threatened to escape, but my voice still cracked. "Yeah." The lie rolling off of my lips sounded obvious. I knew it, and Clay knew it.
His thumb moved gently against my shoulder. "Monroe."
I looked down at my plate. "I’m okay," I tried again, softer this time.
I was relieved when he didn’t call me out on it. He didn’t push. Just stood there, giving me the room to decide if I wanted to say more.
"I’m just..." I swallowed past the lump in my throat. "I’m not used to this."
"Used to what?"
I looked up at him. "Someone caring if I'm okay.
" I shook my head, trying to stop the tears from even forming.
“I know it sounds stupid but I’ve spent so much of my life convincing myself that if I just kept everyone else happy, if I didn't make problems, if I didn't need anything...
" I shrugged helplessly. "Then maybe people wouldn't leave. And look where that got me.”
“Monroe, you don’t have to own your place here.”
“You don’t mean that,” I mumbled.
“I’m serious.” His eyes held mine. "You don't have to constantly do things to somehow earn your keep.
You don't have to make yourself smaller.
You don't have to apologize every time something hard happens. You're here because you belong here. And I wouldn’t want it any other way.” The last sentence came out in barely a whisper, but it still packed a punch.
Sensing my emotions, Maverick sat his head on my lap and sighed just as Kaleigh came bustling back downstairs in her bathing suit.
“Kaleigh, I thought I told you to get dressed.”
“I am dressed, Daddy. Dress to get in the pool!”
“We’re not…” Clay started.
“I think the pool sounds like a good way to start our day. Why don’t you tidy your room up while I change,” I bartered.
“Okay!”
Right back up the stairs she went. I knew it wouldn’t take her long to clean up because we spent time before bed every night tidying things. Which meant, I had the perfect excuse to avoid any more heavy conversations with Clay, for now.
“Thank you for breakfast,” I said as I stood.
“You barely touched it,” he grunted.
I picked up another piece of bacon off the plate and shoved it in my mouth. “I had plenty. Better to have a few smaller meals than three big ones. Keeps the morning sickness at bay. Sometimes.”
He cleared his throat. “Speaking of…and I know this is really none of my business but I’m going to ask anyway. Have you been getting prenatal care?”
I nodded. “Yes. Absolutely. Sloane actually started my insurance effective day one, which I was really thankful for. So I found an OB and I’ve been going to all of my appointments while Kaleigh is in preschool.”
Relief seemed to flood his face. “Okay. Good.” Clay pulled out his phone. “When’s your next appointment.”
“In two weeks.”
“Got an exact date and time? You’re not going alone.”
I wanted to argue and tell him that I could handle it but then I remembered the black motorcycle from yesterday and the look on Clay’s face as I explained everything to him last night. He wasn’t saying it because he was trying to over step. He wanted to keep me safe.
So, I gave him the date and time, watching as he added it to his phone.
“I’ll be there.”