Chapter 17
Lily
Marcus - Think I have a new favorite outfit.
Lily - Explain.
Marcus - Watching your ass in my sweats and your heels walk up those steps. It took everything in me not to throw you back in my car. *Bites knuckles*
Lily - You’re insane.
Smiling down at my phone, I dry my hair absentmindedly with my towel as I walk into the kitchen. I’m in my leggings and oversized jumper, and I have a little pep in my step and a sway to my hips at his words.
“Someone’s smiley this morning.”
“Jesus Christ.” Jumping out of my skin, I drop my phone and towel.
“Beck, why be a creeper?” Bending, I pick everything up off the floor, before throwing the towel in his face and placing my phone on the side.
I was so in my head, I didn’t spot him sitting at our kitchen table.
“Want one?” I wave his mug at him and he nods as he smiles, putting my towel on the table.
“I’m not a creeper. I've been here the whole time watching you grin like a fool at your phone. So come on, who has you smiling like that?”
“Someone from work just sent me a funny meme.” I continue to make our drinks, not making eye contact with my best friend while he assesses me. “Have you heard from Jade?” Deflecting, because he can read me like a book, but also, I need to know how Olivia is.
“No, not yet. But I’ve heard from Hunter though.”
“I’m not surprised. That man is so in love with Jade, it makes me sick.” I grin.
“I know.”
Placing our mugs on the table, I sit down opposite Beck.
“Jade just closed down to everything last night that wasn’t to do with her mum.
She can’t cope with anything else right now.
” My hands start to tremble, making my tea spill over onto my hand.
“Fuck!” Putting the mug down, I wipe the mess up with the towel that Beck silently hands me. “Thanks.”
“You good?”
“Peachy.” I tap my hands on my lap to relieve the tension building.
“She’s so tired all the time, Frank. This is the third chest infection in as many months, and look at these bruises.
” Mummy lifts the bed sheet to show my daddy the huge bruises I got when Daryl bumped into me on the playground.
I was so mad. I scuffed my new Nike Jordans, they had the red tick, and they are the exact same ones Jenna Dillan wears.
She’s my favorite England football player.
Daddy took me to the under twenty ones game at Wembley last month and I saw her score.
Best day ever.
I screamed so loud.
She waved at me and even signed my flag. I waited outside the changing rooms. I was bouncing up and down, my face hurt from smiling. And she was wearing those exact same trainers. And Daryl made me scuff them.
“We’ll take her to the doctors in the morning, Charlie. I’m sure it’s nothing, love.”
“Frank, it’s not nothing. This isn’t normal.” Mummy covers me back up, moving my hair off my face. “She’s only nine years old, Frank.”
“Exactly. She’s just a kid. Kids get ill all the time.”
“I’m here, babe.” Beck’s holding my hand across the table as I shake off the memory. “Don’t fall into that place again.” His voice is gentle as he refuses to let go of my hand.
Nodding, I squeeze my oldest friend's hand. “I know, babe. I’m good, I swear.” I offer him a small smile.
“You know, I’m travelling with work this week and will be in Madrid for a few weeks, but I need you to keep me updated with Olivia.
” My tone turns serious as I continue. “If anything happens and I mean anything, I need to know. I’ll be back. I won't wait. I’ll be here.”
“I know and I will. But she’ll be okay, Lils.”
“You don’t know that,” I whisper.
“You have to believe she will, because the alternative can’t happen.”
My eyelids are barely open as I scan the boards for my departure gate early Wednesday morning.
My red hair was a tangled mess this morning, and I was already running late, so I threw on a black baseball cap to hide the fact that I used my fingers to tame it.
I haven’t slept well since I got back from Marcus’s.
My mind hasn’t stopped racing with concern for Olivia and Jade.
But when I do finally drift off, my brain takes me there.
To the place where my chest tightens to the point of pain, and I’m dripping in sweat when I eventually pull myself back to reality.
When I woke up in Marcus’s arms after the gala, I knew I’d gone there, but his voice somehow held me back. I could hear it faintly as I fought against the power threatening to take me back under. His soothing touch, gentle kisses, and words caressing me. Holding onto me until I calmed.
It was only ever my mum who could keep me from falling.
I frown as I try to stop myself from thinking about what that could mean.
One night.
It was one night that I desperately needed, but that’s it. Nothing more.
Finding my gate, I slump down, settling into the generic plastic chair, watching the planes out of the massive windows.
Pulling my oversized leather jacket around me, I think about my mum and all she’s done for me, and I have an urge to hear her voice.
I know it’s early, but she’ll be up; she has always been an early riser.
Taking my phone out of my jacket, I scroll, finding her number, and I hit call. Sometimes a girl just needs her mum.
“Hey, you.” She answers on the second ring. “Shouldn’t you be at the airport by now?” Her chirpy, vibrant voice filters down the line and instantly makes me relax.
“Hey, Mum. Yes, I’m at the gate already.”
“So, what are you doing calling me this early? Not that I don’t love to hear from my little miracle.” Instantly, I’m hit with a mixture of emotions at her use of my childhood nickname.
“Olivia relapsed.” I blurt out the two words that break me and my mum as she inhales sharply.
“I see.” I hear her fumbling in the background, making her morning brew—we’re so alike, it’s uncanny.
She’s been friends with Olivia ever since I became friends with Jade, so I know the news will hurt her the same way it has me.
“Is she okay? I’ve been meaning to call her to arrange a lunch date, but what with Tyler…
” She drifts off. I know she’s been helping my brother with his own problems lately; we’ve all been worried about him.
“She will understand, Mum.”
“I know she will, but it doesn’t stop me from feeling guilty, sweetie.
But tell me, how is she doing?” Her voice is soft and warm, and I close my eyes, imagining she’s settling into her favorite spot at the kitchen table where she can look out to her beautiful garden that her and dad spend so long tending to.
“She’s stable.” I sigh.
“Well, that’s promising. I’ll check in on Jade today.” She pauses, and I know she is waiting for me to say something, but when I don’t, she continues. “But Lily, how are you?” See, she knows, knows I’m struggling the same way Beck knew.
“Not good, Mum.” My voice breaks slightly as I hold back tears. “I should be beaming with excitement; this trip is my huge break, but I just feel numb.”
“You’re allowed to feel hurt, baby.”
“I know, but people would kill to do what I do. I would on a normal day. I’m living my dream, everything I’ve worked so hard to achieve is right here in my grasp.
But all I can think of is I could lose her, and how selfish is that?
” Rubbing my fingers across my forehead to relieve the pressure building, I continue.
“She’s Jade’s mum, not mine. She's the one who will lose the most important person to her.”
“Let’s take a step back here,” she reasons calmly.
“Yes, Jade will be hurting, but you’re allowed to as well.
Olivia is a huge part of your life. And you’ve always felt more than others, so the fact that you’re feeling this way is because your feelings are elsewhere right now, which is totally understandable, sweetie. ”
“I know you’re right.”
“I know I am, that’s why I’m the parent here.” I almost feel her grin through the phone.
“No one likes a showoff, Mother,” I say playfully. Five minutes chatting with her, getting all my feelings out, really does lift some of the heaviness settled on my chest.
“I beg to differ with that,” she quips. “Now, how are you feeling?”
“Much better, thank you.”
“Good, because now I need to know about that beautiful man that you’re traveling with. Is he a good kisser? I bet he is. All power and dominance.”
“Jesus, Mother, cool off, will you? Dad not looking after you?” I mock, trying to deflect.
“Your father looks after me very well, sweetie.” I immediately cringe at her tone because I don’t need to know about their bedroom antics, thank you very much.
“Too much, Mum.”
“You brought it up,” she says brightly.
“And I instantly regreted it.”
“Now, this man, explain.” Christ, she’s like a dog with a bone.
“There’s nothing to explain.” I try again to move on from this line of questioning.
“I know you’re lying to me, Lily Chambers. I’m your mum and we know these things.”
“Yeah, well, there are some things your daughter wishes to keep secret.”
“For now, I’ll allow it because your dad is coming down the stairs and we both know how that conversation would go if he heard you’ve been with that hunk of a man.”
“But I haven’t.” I lie.
“Hush now. I know you have.” My brow knits because how could she?
I’ve not told a soul. “I need details and not to play referee while you tell your dad you’re a grown woman, while he still calls you his little girl.
Now, call me when you can, preferably when your dad’s at work so I can get all the deets. ”
“Never use the word deets again.” I rub my eyes and sigh.
“If you tell me everything, I’ll never use it again.”
“Deal.”
“I knew it,” she shouts. Subtle Lily. This woman should have worked for MI6 and not the NHS. In the background, I hear Dad ask what she’s shouting about. “Nothing, dear,” she chirps. “Say hello to Lily.”
“Hi, Lily bug,” Dad shouts. Hearing the tell-tale sound of the kettle boiling, I smile to myself; we’re a family of tea drinkers. Typical Brits in every way.
“Right, I love you both, but I think my plane will be boarding soon.”
“Okay, sweetie. I expect a call very soon.” The excitement in her voice makes me chuckle. “Love you.”
“Love you too.” I hang up and slip my phone back in my pocket, tipping my head back, closing my eyes, letting out a deep breath. She always brings me back round, but the moment she’s gone, the noise creeps back in.
“You aren’t a morning person, are you, Chambers?
” Opening my eyes, I slowly drag my head up.
Marcus gazes across at me as he sinks into the chair opposite.
He looks like he just stepped out of a magazine, and I look like a fucking trainwreck.
A crisp white t-shirt peaks out of the collar of his black jacket, hiding away his artwork that I studied in great detail that night.
With his arms draped over me while he slept, I trailed my fingers over the intricate details.
They’re truly beautiful. But the one in particular that I kept coming back to was the extremely detailed black and gray sunset over a field of white lilies.
It was entangled amongst the black swirls and other extremely stunning pieces.
Whoever his tattoo artist is, they’re unbelievably talented.
But I was desperate to understand what they all meant because each one looked like it was meant to be there.
Not one seemed out of place; they all just flowed like they were a part of him.
“It would appear not.” I return my gaze out the window.
My tired brain isn’t able to handle seeing him yet.
This is the first time I’ve seen or spoken to him since he dropped me off the morning after the gala.
I’m ashamed to admit, I’ve been avoiding him.
“I’m surprised to see you here. Thought stars like you only fly business. ”
“We do.” He stands offering me his hand. I look up at him, my brow furrowed. “Just get up, Chambers, and take my hand. Did you not check your tickets?”
Honestly? No, I didn't. I’m that tired today. I'm actually surprised I’ve made it this far. I look at my boarding pass, my eyes going wide when I realize where my seat is.
Seat 1A.
My head flies up, meeting Marcus’s warm smile. “Come on, let's get you a drink. I’m sure the staff in the business lounge know how to make a proper brew.” He winks at me, and I feel my lips curl slightly. Mum’s right, he is a beautiful man.