Chapter 6 #2
“Well, serves you right for making up that bit about someone having a peanut allergy,” they reply without missing a beat. “Ableist and enbyphobic? Not great at first impressions, are you?”
I hesitate before shrugging. “My track record isn’t perfect, but what CIS white guy’s is?”
Jude laughs. “Fair point.” They examine me again—softer this time. “But Max says you’re an ally, so I won’t hold your white CIS-ness against you right away.”
“I truly appreciate that.”
They tear open the fortune cookie wrapper, pop the first half into their mouth, and lean against the counter adjacent to me. “So,” they continue after a moment of chewing. “I take it you’re also a freshman?”
“For now,” I reply. “Just wait until next year.”
“Wow,” Jude groans, but they’re still smiling. “A real comedian.”
“I dabble. I’m hoping I can at least minor in it.”
“Ah, so you’re a philosophy major then?”
I snort. “Good one. No, I’m undecided.”
Jude’s nose shrivels. “Oh, you’re one of those.”
“A walking stereotype, I’m afraid.”
“Bummer. And here I was just starting to like you.”
Something in my chest lurches. Not an ideal moment to have heartburn, so I try to ignore it. “What about you?”
“I’m a sophomore,” Jude says after finishing off the last bit of their cookie. “Majoring—”
“Wait,” I interrupt. “Can I guess?”
Jude’s eyes narrow, but they grin. “Sure. Go for it.”
“Business? No, English. Definitely English.”
“Final answer?”
“Hang on,” I stall, crossing one arm across my stomach and using my other hand to stroke my chin thoughtfully. “Psychology. It has to be psychology. You’ve been psychoanalyzing me since you walked in the door, which is no surprise, really. I’m an excellent specimen, ripe for diagnosis.”
Jude snickers. “Now, that last bit, I can agree with.”
“So, I’m right?”
“Nope,” Jude says, crossing their arms. “Any other guesses?”
“Damn. Don’t tell me it’s something super boring like accounting or economics.”
“No hints.”
“Ugh,” I groan. “Fine. One last guess.” I lean closer, crouching a little so that we’re eye-level.
Jude doesn’t flinch—they only stare back challengingly, brow raised, and lips in a coy smirk.
My chest does the weird little flutter thing again, and I wonder if I should be concerned.
Finally, I snap my fingers and blurt it out: “Philosophy. That’s why you made the joke about it being for comedians.
Only someone studying philosophy would make that joke. Boom. Final answer.”
Jude pulls their lips tight for a moment, then grins even wider. “Not even close, dude. I’m majoring in social work.”
I scoff, crossing my arms in frustration. “What? That’s basically psychology, isn’t it?”
“No, it’s very different,” Jude says. “It’s more closely tied to policy studies than psychology. A completely separate program with entirely different requirements.”
“Whatever,” I grumble. “I’m counting it.”
“I’d expect nothing less, Mr. Undeclared.”
“Uh oh,” Max interjects before I can think of a comeback. He steps into the kitchen with nervous eyes but maintains his wide smile. “What have I stumbled into? Picking fights with one of my new roommates already, Jude?”
Jude rolls their eyes, but there’s still a flicker of mischief in them that holds me captive. “I don’t think I’d call this a fight, but I can’t decide. If only I could find someone who could make a decision around here.”
My chest vibrates again. “I think it’s only a fight if we’re not having a good time, right?”
Jude snorts. “Oh, is that so?”
Max stares incredulously at us both for a moment, then his nose scrunches. “Eww, are you guys flirting?”
Fear shoots through my veins, and I instinctively take a step away from Jude. The last thing I want is for either of them to think that I’m some creepy guy trying to get into everyone’s pants. “Oh, no, no, it’s not—”
“Oh, God, no!” Jude exclaims at the same time, but their face twists with disgust in a way that almost hurts my feelings.
“Oh, thank God,” Max sighs with relief, which, again, doesn’t feel great, but I try to move past it. “I mean, no offense to either of you, but—”
“I’m into girls,” Jude declares. “Like, exclusively.”
“Exactly,” Max says.
“Yeah, totally,” I answer stupidly. “I mean, who isn’t?”
“Well, I’m not,” Max clarifies. “Into girls, I mean. Like, not at all.”
“Of course,” I add with a nod. “Neither is Caleb.”
“What about Caleb?” Theo asks, having only just returned to the dorm after walking Caleb downstairs. He’s eyeing me nervously.
“He’s not into girls,” I blurt, feeling dumber by the second. “Neither is Max. But Jude is. And Theo is. But Theo is into both. He’s bisexual.” God, I wish I could shut up.
“Oh, are we declaring our sexualities?” a new, unfamiliar voice asks from the living room. My eyes follow the sound to a tall woman with a tawny complexion and soft, tightly coiled black hair, watching me suspiciously from the couch. “I’m straight, unfortunately.”
“Same,” says Harrison, whom I honestly forgot was still here.
“Also straight,” Vimlesh mutters uncomfortably from the floor pillow. Shit, when did he join the party?
“Okay, wow, great job, everyone!” Max interjects anxiously. “Glad we got all of that out there! Thanks, Oliver.”
I try desperately to will my face to cool down. “Anytime.”
Max and Jude exchange a look, then Max retrieves a sparkling water from the fridge. “Anyway, I’ll leave y’all to…whatever weird shit y’all were up to before I interrupted.”
Before Jude can answer, the girl on the couch calls Jude’s name and gestures for them to join her. Jude smiles and complies, scooting past me without another word.
Well, shit.
I didn’t even get to find out what the fortune from their fortune cookie said.