Chapter 9 - Shane
Hyacinth’s violent exit leaves the room ringing with tension, even after she’s long gone. Minutes tick by while I sit there, trying to figure out what I should do next.
Do I go after her? She sure as hell doesn’t want to talk to me, but if I leave her alone, will it seem like I’m ignoring her or that I don’t care?
Groaning, I put my head in my hands and close my eyes.
I always knew relationships were complicated, but this is truly mind-bending.
I rub my temples idly, trying to relieve the band of tension wrapped around my skull. Over the past few days, I’ve done a lot of things I now regret, and it seems like there is no way out of this deep, dark well I’ve slowly dug myself into.
My phone buzzes in my pocket again, and my heart sinks. The pressure in my chest increases sharply, and I wonder if this is what a panic attack feels like.
Everything I do right now just feels like a distraction from the horror of my whole pack dying while I sit here utterly helpless to stop it.
Slowly, I pull my phone out of my pocket and swipe the screen. Messages have been piling up all day—updates from the infirmary, and texts from families in the area requesting assistance.
The latest message is from Kara, one of the nurses, telling me that Liza’s burial is happening tonight. The news makes me leap to my feet. Hurrying down the hall, I almost burst straight into Hyacinth’s room, but stop myself at the last second.
It’s her room now. I have to respect her space.
I knock softly, calling out “Hello?” but getting no answer. I crack the door open a little and see her curled up on the camp bed, snoring softly.
I don’t want to leave her here alone. What if she runs?
Walking back down the hall, I think about how she said she’d never leave her bakery. I realize I do believe that.
I have to meet her halfway. Maybe then, we can work together to break this curse.
There isn’t much hope in me as I clear up the kitchen and head out the door. My heart grows heavier in my chest with every mile that passes, bringing me closer to the infirmary and all the misery it contains.
When I pull up out front, the dark vibes are so strong that it almost looks like clouds have gathered around the roof.
Is it the curse I’m seeing, or just the hopelessness of my people?
As I approach the old church, a few people see me coming and hurry towards me. I recognize Sally and Giles, younger pack members who have taken on more responsibility as others fell ill.
“It’s good to see you, Alpha,” Sally says. “Tonight is a busy one.”
“I’m here to help,” I reply. “Tell me what you need.”
“The burial will be in a few hours,” Giles says. “The graves are currently being dug. We have seven to farewell tonight.”
Too many.
“How are the healers holding up?” I ask. “Have they had enough breaks today?”
“Not really,” Sally replies. “It’s difficult to get them to stop. They take every death so personally. Kara is passed out in one of the back rooms right now. She really believes that if she doesn’t leave her patients alone, they won’t die.”
“Is she right?” I ask, my tone grim.
“No,” Giles answers sadly. “A little boy died in her arms earlier today.”
“Fuck,” I mutter.
Sally nods. “We’re truly out of options, Alpha. Please tell us you have good news.”
I look into their trusting, expectant faces, and I literally can’t think of a word to say. Telling them about Hyacinth seems like a ridiculous thing to do, especially since mating with her hasn’t changed anything.
“All I can tell you is, I’m working on it,” I say, sighing. “And so are the others. I believe Sadie and Trina are still at the manor, working with the elders.”
“And they really can’t leave?” Giles asks. “They’re trapped there?”
“It seems so,” I answer. “But I have absolutely no idea about how magic works, so don’t ask me to explain it.”
“Creepy,” Giles says with a little whistle. “Witches are even more dangerous than we feared.”
His words hit me on a personal level, and anger sparks in my chest. I brush past both of them to go inside, hurrying away before I take out my inner pain on them.
Witches. Witches did it all! Maybe we should have worked harder to exterminate them.
Dark memories threaten my mind, and I roughly shove them away, focusing on the hard work in the infirmary to distract myself. Going from bed to bed, I talk to my people, comforting them as best I can.
I feel like a fraud. Walking around, counseling hope, when I have none.
Soon, I move on to changing beds and stacking supplies, trying to stay active to distract my mind. While I work with a couple of others to restock the equipment, I see several new patients being brought in.
I’ve never felt so helpless. I would cut open my chest and give my own heart if it would stop this.
Desperation cascades through me, a fiery wave that pricks goosebumps onto my skin. I stagger out the back, leaning on my knees as I gulp fresh air and let the sweat cool on my skin.
Is this another panic attack? I wouldn’t blame myself if it were.
“Alpha?” A soft voice drifts through the night.
“Yes?” I ask, straightening up. I run a hand through my hair and try to compose myself, but I suspect I’m not fooling anyone.
Even myself.
“The graves are finished,” Giles says. “We’re going over to pay our respects now. Are you coming?”
“Yes,” I reply. “I’m coming.”
Giles walks ahead of me, looking back over his shoulder with some concern. I want to say something to him, but I can’t find a single word of encouragement in my head.
He’s probably freaking out that he saw me freaking out. If the alpha can’t keep it together, what hope does the rest of the pack have?
I shove that question away, keeping my mind blank as I approach the small crowd of people gathered under the trees. Full night has fallen, and only pale starlight illuminates the scene.
My eyes are nowhere near as keen as they used to be, but I can make out the dark graves on the ground and the bodies laid beside them, wrapped in white sheets. I let my eyes linger on the scene, burning it into my mind.
I will not forget any of you—not a single one. Everything I do, I do for you.
As each person is lowered into the grave, their family steps up to say a few words. Most of them are unwell, barely able to support themselves as they struggle to say goodbye.
When it comes to Liza’s turn, everyone present falls into a deep silence. We watch her body being lowered into the earth, and people weep openly. Every moment that passes feels like a saw cutting into my chest, and I wish with every fiber of my being that I could howl my pain into the sky.
I will fix this, I swear. I will do whatever it takes to break this curse!
The night seems to sigh, a breath of wind teasing around my head as something within the shadows shifts. A strange prickly sensation runs up my spine, making me feel like I’m being watched.
The other wolves don’t seem to notice anything as they continue the funeral rite.
I put my attention back on the matter at hand and stand before the pack to say my own farewells to Liza and the others.
After we’re done, the machines come in to fill the graves.
I watch as the others slowly head back towards the infirmary.
“Alpha?” Giles asks, making me jump.
“Yes?”
“What will you do now?”
“I’m going to meet with the other alphas,” I reply. “I need to understand more about how they healed their packs.”
Giles nods. “Not a bad idea. I’ll keep you updated.”
I wave as he walks away, looking back at the graves one last time. Before my emotions can overwhelm me, I turn and head back to my car, texting the others on the way.
***
I meet Rhys and Owen at one of the small bars outside of town. Both of them arrive before me. When I sit down, they don’t say anything, and when I look up, both of them are staring at me with wide eyes.
“What?” I ask. “You look like you’ve just seen a zombie sit down in front of you.”
“Don’t take this the wrong way,” Rhys says. “But that is exactly what you look like.”
“Thanks,” I grunt, resting my head in my hands.
“Seriously,” Owen says, putting a hand on my shoulder. “Are you alright?”
“No,” I whisper, shaking my head. “Not at all. What happened at the manor this morning?”
Rhys sighs. “The elders can’t leave the manor. By the time they reached the front drive, all of them had severe headaches and nausea. It was an aspect of the spell that they didn’t even really notice that they couldn’t leave. Now that they do know, they’re getting sicker.”
“But your meeting,” I say, looking up at them. “Did all of you decide what will be done if the elders themselves die?”
“A chain of command was decided upon,” Owen says. “But it’s not going to matter. All our packs will fall apart before the elders die. The curse is connected to the manor, and the elders represent our ancient laws. Sadie says that’s why they’re stuck there. It’s a punishment.”
“Isn’t all of this a punishment?” I mutter.
“Yes,” Rhys says. “But it’s meant for Darian. If only he were still around. We could make sure he took the heat off us.”
“What did happen to Darian?” I ask. “We know Lynette was locked up in the manor and probably died there, but what about our wolf king?”
“Mixed reports,” Owen says. “The girls have been trying to figure that out. Some say he lived a long life here and died an old man. Other reports say he died on a hunt. Others say that he left the area completely.”
“That seems strange,” I reply, frowning. “We don’t even know what happened to our own monarch?”
Rhys shakes his head. “Darian appointed a council not long after he ordered the execution of all witches. From there, he sent out kill squads and hunting parties. There isn’t much news on the man himself after that.”
“Well, we need to figure out what became of him,” I say. “Obviously, he’s the one Lynette wants revenge on.”
“You’re talking about them as if they’re really here,” Owen replies.
“They are,” I answer. “They are just as real as we are. Everything that is happening right now is happening because of them!”
Silence falls around the table, and I know the others are probably thinking the same thing.
“We buried too many wolves tonight,” I say. “And neither of you has to deal with that anymore. I’m exhausted and terrified. I don’t know what to do.”
Rhys puts a hand on my shoulder. “We have to trust Sadie,” he says. “She knows what she’s doing.”
Anger rises in me, and I have to bite my tongue. I’m so tired and strung out, I could easily yell at him, but I hold it in.
Deep down, I don’t know if I believe the witches are helping us. What if this is part of their grand plan to exterminate us?
“How did it work?” I ask, trying to focus on the matter at hand. “I know both of you have dealt with the hopelessness of watching your people die, and it was your mates who healed them. Is there anything I should be doing to help?”
Rhys shakes his head. “It was up to the girls. They had to find their power, and once they did, they were led towards the actions that were needed to break the curse.”
“The curse isn’t broken,” I mutter.
“No, of course not,” Owen replies. “Not entirely. But for us, it was. I felt it. The release of power was… extreme.”
“Yes,” Rhys adds thoughtfully. “It was felt through every member of the pack. Sadie getting close to people definitely helped, I think.”
“I agree,” Owen says. “Trina connected much more after meeting the pack. She seemed to grow in strength immediately.”
“Okay, great,” I say. “I’ll introduce Hyacinth to the pack. But was there something, anything else? I feel like I can’t waste another second here, and if there’s a magic bullet, I’ll use it.”
“Well…” Rhys says, fidgeting uncomfortably.
“Well…” Owen echoes.
I look between the two of them in disbelief. “If you know something, then tell me!” I demand. “I can tell you’re keeping some kind of secret. If it can help my people, you have to spill it.”
“Sex,” Rhys says.
“Sex,” Owen echoes again. “The girls didn’t start to embrace their powers until after we had sex.”
I stare at them in disbelief, but nobody laughs.
“You’re really serious,” I whisper.
Rhys nods. “I’d like to say it’s a coincidence or something, but it’s not. Once we were physically connected, the magic was unleashed.”
“It wasn’t easy,” Owen warns. “In fact, leading up to it was pretty much hell. I’d be very careful about how you bring this up.”
“Ain’t that the fucking truth,” I groan, putting my head in my hands.
My body awakens, just a little, and the spreading heat inside me makes me think about Hyacinth. Images flash through my mind, teasing me as excitement rises in my chest.
Mental pictures of her beauty and her smile are suddenly shattered by the memories of her crying, yelling, or running away from me. My heart sinks, and my stomach churns, leaving me feeling worse than I have all day.
I came here without hope, ready to do whatever it took to save my people. I would sacrifice myself without hesitation. But how can I ask this of Hyacinth?