19. Stoney
CHAPTER NINETEEN
STONEY
D oll entered the suite and slammed the door behind her. “What’s wrong with you?” I asked her from the couch, but she stomped toward her bedroom.
Being the good friend that I was, I got up and went to see what was going on. Doll tossed herself against the bed and screamed into her pillow.
“You did it, didn’t you?”
She lifted her head and faced me. Tears coated her face. Our connection was so strong that Doll didn’t even have to speak on what was going on. I already knew. She was falling for Scar when I told her ass not to.
“Some chick just showed up at his door.”
Sighing, I entered the room and took a seat on the side of the bed. “Doll, I tried to tell you the type of person he was. He’s not capable of being with one woman. You’ll be wasting your time if you think so. Scar is a dog. I’m not tryna sound like a hater or anything, but he has a bunch of women in rotation. You’re one of ’em. You have to have thick skin to deal with a man like him. And please don’t go into it thinking that you can change him, ’cause no woman walking God’s green earth can change a man unless he’s wearing a diaper. The only way a man gon’ change is if he wants to change himself.”
“I was trying not to fall for him. I promise you I was, but he was making it so damn hard.”
“You’re human. You can’t fault yourself for that. You live and you learn.”
“I’m just gonna hang out with that guy that I met at the restaurant to see if I can take my mind off him.”
“We both know that shit isn’t gon’ work.”
“But it’s worth a try though.” She grabbed her phone and mine began to ring.
I looked down and saw it was an unknown number then answered, “Hello?”
“Stoney, don’t hang up the phone,” Wade’s voice said, and I almost did. I slipped from the edge of the bed and went into my room then shut the door behind me. I told Doll that I was no longer dealing with Wade. I blocked him on all social media so it was a surprise that he was calling me right now. Normally, I would have hung the phone up in his face, but deep down, I wanted to hear what he had to say.
“What do you want, Wade?”
“First, I want to apologize to you. You didn’t deserve that shit. I was wrong as hell.” I stood there silently. If he thought I wasn’t gon’ agree with him, he was a damn fool. “Secondly, I miss you.”
“Uh uh. You don’t get to call my phone while I’m on vacation and tell me that you miss me. You had a whole fucking woman at home. I was your side bitch!” I yelled a lil louder than I intended. “I have never in my life been a side bitch before. You embarrassed the fuck out of me. The shit y’all did, you could have handled over the phone or in private. Y’all invited me out to a restaurant to embarrass me. You claimed you loved me, but you could do something like that to me. You can take that apology and shove it right up yo’ fucking ass. Hers too if you want.” I ended the call before he was able to say anything else and placed that number on the block list.
He could apologize all he wanted, but I wasn’t in the right healing space to accept it. I know that I had to forgive him, but at the moment, I hated that man. I despised the fuck out of him and wished that he’d feel the exact pain he caused me. Wade begged for my time just to waste my shit.
I slipped my feet into my Coach slides and exited the room. Doll was snickering talking on the phone when I passed her door, so I didn’t bother to dampen her mood with my negative energy.
I exited the suite and pressed the button for the elevator. When it dinged, I saw Scar standing there. I waited for a moment to see if he was ’bout to get off and go see Doll, but he didn’t budge, so I stepped on.
“Is that weed I smell?” My eyes shifted up to his face and he gazed down at me with a smirk.
“What you know ’bout weed?”
“Let me buy a blunt.”
Scar looked me up and down then reached into his pocket and pulled out a Ziploc bag filled with weed. I had never seen that much weed in my life. Opening the bag, he reached inside and pulled out some. I opened my hand and he dropped it in there.
“Do you even know how to roll a blunt?”
“Nope, but I’ll figure it out.”
Chuckling, he shook his head and hit the stop button on the elevator. It jerked. He pulled out a pack from his pocket and I stood there admiring him how he effortlessly rolled me a blunt.
“You asking for shit you don’t even know how to roll.”
“Look, don’t judge me. I’m going thru some shit right now.”
“This shit right here gon’ take yo’ ass above the clouds. Don’t try to face all of it at once.”
“Noted.” He handed me the blunt and I smirked at it. “Oh, you got a lighter?”
Scar shook his head again and grabbed a Bic from his other pocket. “Now you gon’ make me have to make a trip to the store.”
He started the elevator back up and we got off in the lobby. We silently strolled to the exit and went our separate ways. Him toward the parking lot and me toward the beach.
The closer I got to the beach, I noticed dark clouds forming in the sky. I placed the blunt between my lips and lit the tip of it. My mind was fucked up. It was fucked after that incident with Schizo and even more so when Wade had the nerves to call my fucking phone. I’on know what he thought he was gon’ fix with that lil telephone call, but all he did was open up wounds I tried to bury.
Niggas didn’t function properly. All he had to do was take his win and leave me the fuck alone. He broke me. He ripped my heart out of my chest and made me hate men’s very existence. He didn’t have to spin the block and cause more heartache. I was finally becoming fine with him no longer being in my life and he just had to make it known that there were still some tiny feelings swimming ’round my heart for him.
A raindrop crashed against my cheek. I gazed up at the dark sky. Instead of rushing back to the hotel, I politely took a seat in the warm sand and sat there. It began to pour. The rain beat against my skin. Thunder sounded off in the distance.
All my tears seeped out. My heart hurt for more than one reason. It hurt ’cause of Wade. It hurt ’cause I yearned for Schizo and now I can’t have him. It was as if God was punishing me or something. He kept giving me shit he knew I wanted, but only just a tiny bit where he could snatch it right away.
My tears mixed in with the rain. I pulled my knees up to my chest and let out a gut-wrenching scream. My love life was a mess and it wasn’t fair. I wanted to be loved. I wanted a man that didn’t belong to someone else. I wanted genuine love.
“God, please hear my aching heart,” I whispered and sniffled, resting my face against my wet knees.