Chapter 7 #2
Remi shakes her head. “He has his own house, and it’s super nice. I don’t blame them for preferring to stay there. But, yeah, it still kind of sucks because …”
“You miss her?”
“Yeah,” she answers softly.
“That’s understandable though. I know I’m the last person that should be giving advice on relationships, but I feel like there should be a healthy balance.”
“I agree. Elena and I will figure things out though.” Remi flashes her a quick, reassuring smile. “We’ve been through a lot—some really rough times—and if there’s one thing I know it’s that we’ll always be there for each other.”
Remi’s not sure she could have survived the months following Anna’s loss without Elena staying the night and her mom making sure they both ate.
While Remi’s parents tried their best to be there for her emotionally, it wasn’t the same as having someone who understood and shared her grief beside her.
Elena and Remi made it through that year because they had one another to rely on. They were always close, but they’ve been inseparable ever since.
“I’m glad you have each other,” Paige says softly, pulling Remi back into the moment.
“So, tell me about your best friend,” Remi says. “Kennedy, right?”
“Yep! I can actually relate a little to what’s going on with you and Elena.”
“Oh, yeah?”
“She moved to Florida for a career opportunity she couldn’t pass up, and it’s been rough. I’m a pretty private person and prefer having a small circle. I just didn’t realize how small my circle was until Kennedy was a nineteen-hour car ride and two-and-a-half-hour flight away.”
Oof. That definitely stinks. “When did she move?”
“Almost two years ago. Kenny was actually the one who suggested I pick up a hobby.”
Remi lifts her eyebrows in question.
She snorts. “I may or may not have been blowing up her phone every day.” Her smile is anything but apologetic.
Remi laughs. “Oh, did you now?”
“I plead the fifth.” Paige grins. “It’s not my fault though. We’ve been glued to one another’s side since the sixth grade, and it’s not like I can be close to anyone at work. I have to be professional.”
“That’s fair.”
“Thank you.” Paige straightens out her skirt. “So, I tried out rock climbing. I met Tyler my second time there, and, well, yeah … That was great—at least for a little while.”
“Oh, yeah. You all had a tight-knit little friend group, right?” Remi may or may not have seen the photo evidence when she was online stalking Paige during a sleepless night where all she could think about was how soft her lips might be.
Paige takes a deep breath. “Yeah. I molded seamlessly into his friend group—or so I thought. It was Tyler, Mateo, Spencer, Brianna, and me.”
Remi nods. The way Paige’s voice dips, she anticipates there’s more Paige isn’t saying, so she remains quiet, giving her the space to decide if she wants to share.
“The reason Tyler and I broke up is because I caught him and Brianna having sex.”
Remi’s jaw drops.
What a fucking weasel.
“Yep.” She pops the P. “Here I am thinking I finally have this great group of friends. We climbed together. Went out to dinner at least once a week. Celebrated birthdays and Friendsgiving. I thought I could trust them, yet the whole time Brianna was secretly trying to steal my boyfriend.”
“Shit. I’m sorry, Paige. That’s messed up.”
She makes a small sound of agreement while staring out the window. “It’s the next right.”
Remi flicks her blinker on, completely forgetting she still has no idea where they’re going.
She pulls up to a red light and taps her thumbs along the bottom of her steering wheel.
“Damn, I didn’t think I could hate that guy anymore, and then there he goes topping himself as world’s biggest douche canoe. ”
Paige snorts. “Douche canoe?”
Remi shrugs, and Paige bursts into laughter. “I’m sorry. It’s not that funny. I just wasn’t expecting you to say that.”
The corner of Remi’s mouth ticks up. “He deserves that and worse.”
She instructs Remi to make a left turn, and she takes it. “What happened with the rest of the friend group?”
“I’m not sure. The second I walked in on them, I just took off and blocked Tyler and Brianna’s numbers. Mateo is Tyler’s best friend, so I don’t expect anything from him. Spencer tried to text me a couple of times, but I’ve never responded.”
“Do you think she knows about the cheating?” Remi asks.
“She’s really close with Brianna, so I can’t imagine how she wouldn’t.” Paige shrugs. “Doesn’t matter. I don’t want anything to do with them. That’s why I switched climbing gyms.”
Remi’s lips part. It’s only just now clicking that Tyler started climbing at Remi’s gym shortly after Paige did. Her fingers tighten on the steering wheel as hot anger floods her veins. “He followed you to You Rock? Oh, my god. What a slimy asshole.”
Paige grins and mouths, “Slimy asshole.”
“This guy has a lot of nerve, stalking you and constantly pestering you. I can’t believe it. I’m going to talk to Ricky about—”
“No, don’t,” she says, tone somber.
Ricky is the manager at You Rock. He’s a no-nonsense kind of guy. If Remi explains the situation, he’ll make sure Tyler never climbs when Paige does again. Maybe she can even get Tyler banned.
“I don’t want to draw any more attention to him,” Paige says. “Besides, I think he’s finally taking the hint. Did you notice he wasn’t at the gym at all this week?”
Remi smirks, proud because she did notice that. “Good. I’m glad. You can consider me available for all the fake dating you need to piss him off and make him jealous. I’m even down to put baby powder in his chalk bag.”
Paige snorts. “That’s diabolical. I love it!”
Climbers use chalk to create friction, especially when they’re sweaty. Mixing chalk with baby powder would create the opposite effect and make a person’s slick hands even slippier and increase the chances of falling. It’s definitely diabolical, and Remi wouldn’t actually do it.
Well … never say never for Tyler.
“Thank you, Remi.”
She meets Paige’s eye. “Of course.”
“So, since we’re talking about friends,” Paige says. “Who was that other girl in all your teenage photos with Elena?”
Remi freezes, a chill snaking down her spine. She knows instantly who Paige is asking about. She just didn’t realize Paige saw those photos.
“That was … Anna.” Remi rubs the back of her neck. “She played soccer with us, too, and we were all close throughout high school.”
Paige nods, probably assuming as much. “Did you have a falling out after high school?”
“No, why?”
“She was in a ton of photos, then just stopped.”
Remi hesitates. She long ago learned how weird the women she’s dating can react to Anna. While she’s in a good place in her healing journey, grief doesn’t have an end date.
Like Remi’s therapist loves to remind her, grief isn’t linear. Sometimes the pain is a tidal wave that pulls her under, and it’s a struggle to resurface. Other times it’s a calm swell that barely lifts her off the sand.
Anna was Remi’s best friend and first love; that loss is something she’ll always carry with her.
Yet, Remi still wants to fall in love again and find someone to share the rest of her life with.
But after a college girlfriend broke up with her because she “didn’t want to compete with a ghost” and then another was annoyed by how many photos Elena and Remi had in their apartment, it’s simply easier not to talk about Anna with the women she dates.
But Paige and Remi aren’t dating. They’re friends who have grown closer over the past couple weeks, and Paige was just vulnerable with Remi talking about Tyler. So, while there’s a prickle of fear that Paige’ll react poorly, Remi decides to tell her anyway.
“Anna was in a car accident the summer after our high school graduation. She … didn’t make it.”
Paige’s eyes widen. “Oh, my god. I’m so sorry. We don’t have to talk about this if you don’t want to.”
“It’s okay. It’s not something I like talking about.” At least to anyone besides Elena. “But, yeah. Anna, Elena, and I were this super tight trio. It’s what I meant when I said we’ve been through rough times together.”
Paige nods in understanding.
“Anna and I were dating. She was … my first girlfriend.”
“Damn,” Paige says softly. “I’m so sorry.”
“Thank you.” Remi gives her a small, tight-lipped smile.
Paige reaches out for her hand and squeezes. Remi turns her palm over, and they interlace their fingers. They drive in silence like that, holding hands, until Paige leans forward.
“Here it is,” she says. “Right here on the left.”