Chapter 14
fourteen
LIV
I started fidgeting before my nails were dry.
Niall gave me a knowing look the first time I wiggled my toes.
"I'm fine," I insisted.
"Mmhm." He wasn't convinced in the slightest. Maybe he really did have some kind of connection to my magic.
"It's unfair that yours dry immediately when you shift them. That makes no logical sense. Just distract me," I said. "Not the way you used to, considering the ultimatum you just hit me with."
"It wasn't an ultimatum. It was a statement."
"Stating that you'll never let me figure out if you're my fated mate unless we seal a bond is definitely an ultimatum."
"I didn't threaten to leave you or refuse to be with you if you didn't. That would've been an ultimatum. I set a boundary."
"We're not going to agree on this."
"Probably not."
I wiggled my toes a little harder and forced a slow breath out. "Good thing we're just friends now."
"Good thing. Which paintings did you bring me?" he asked, sounding far too amused.
"I'm not telling you. They were supposed to be part of the bargain."
"So you can get rid of me completely if we're not fated?"
"Maybe."
He snorted. "At least you're not denying it now. I'm not going to bargain, but I'll trade your favorite sports bra for the fifth anniversary painting." He'd painted it about a week before Larson's spell.
"You have the yellow one? I've been looking for it for years!"
"You left it in my truck, after that hike a few days before Larson fucked up the spell."
"I forgot about the truck sex."
"I'm insulted, Livvy."
"You're not."
"Nah. There was a lot of sex."
"In a lot of different places." I blew a puff of air at the piece of hair that was hanging over my eye, and wiggled my toes a little more.
Niall tucked the hair away for me. "I'm maintaining custody of the fifth anniversary painting.
It's your most explicit one. Actually, I want the other four too. Unless you burned them or something."
"It's not my most explicit, and I didn't burn them."
"Did you sell them? Because we're going to have a real issue if you—"
He lifted an eyebrow at me. "You think I sold nude paintings of you? I don't even like it when you walk around in a sports bra."
True.
He was highly possessive.
"Good. You can return them to me."
"So you can destroy them and forget about our relationship when you decide not to risk a mate bond? I don't think so."
"Then we can trade. I brought that painting you love of the forest outside our house." I corrected myself. "My house."
"The anniversary paintings are going to stay right where they are."
"Where are they?"
"My studio."
I flashed him a look. "You put nude paintings of me on the walls of your studio?"
"Nude paintings I created of my female that were done with her permission, yes. Don't make it sound disturbed."
The paintings had accidentally become a tradition on the anniversary of the first time he stayed the night at my house. It was the night of a large gallery event he'd been a part of, which was the only reason we actually knew the date.
On our first anniversary, he gave me the blue couch I adored that still lived in front of my TV, and I gave him the enchanted bedding. Somehow, we started teasing each other about nude paintings. One thing led to another, and I'd stripped and posed for him.
I couldn't sit still for long, obviously, so the quick-and-dirty painting (which took far less time than his usual process) was a two-day affair with so many sex breaks that we both ended up sticky and slightly delirious by the end.
The final product was always significantly more erotic than the original plan.
The memories alone made me smile.
And they made me slightly wet, but that wasn't surprising or unique. Most things did, when it came to Niall.
"You genuinely believe we're fated?" I asked.
He nodded. "Didn't have any doubt until you gave me a fucking heart attack by announcing you were stuck with the wolf."
"If it's any consolation, I also gave myself a heart attack by thinking that. And a hundred panic attacks."
"It isn't."
"Bummer." I blew a strong puff of air on my nails, wiggling my toes a little more. "Ahh, this sucks."
"You know I can fix it." His lips curved upward slightly.
"Don't tempt me."
"There's nothing I enjoy more, Livvy."
"Other than fucking me."
"Maybe."
I touched my right pinky, and groaned when the imprint of my finger remained on the polish. "Dammit."
"You don't need to suffer."
"I do."
"You don't."
I wiggled harder.
He put a hand on my thigh, and I leaned a little closer. "Alright, fine. We're not actually having sex though. I haven't worked through the ultimatum."
"When has not actually having sex ever stopped me?" He dragged his fingers lightly over the front of my shorts, and I arched my hips a little.
"Put your hands on my arm so your nails dry," he said, the casual command so very Niall that it made me miss him even more than usual.
I put my hands on his forearm, holding his thick, inked up body the way I always had when we did this.
It was comfortable. Normal. And I craved that.
He teased me slowly, over the front of my shorts, and I tipped my head back. My eyes closed as he dragged me to the edge without even really touching me.
"Niall," I moaned, arching and rocking as he put a little more pressure on my clit, still dragging his fingers over me so fucking slowly.
This was how it always was with him.
He would wring every possible orgasm from me, even when we were in a bathroom stall, one of our vehicles, or in the middle of the forest.
"Did the wolf make you feel like this?" he asked, his voice gravelly.
"God, no."
"How many other men did you let touch you?"
"None." My fingers dug into his biceps. I was right on the border of a climax, so close it was almost painful.
And he pulled his fingers away.
I groaned.
When I opened my eyes to look at his face, he wore a dangerous look that told me this was revenge. Revenge for screwing Jonah, probably.
Niall slipped his hand in the waistband of my shorts, and harsh breaths escaped us both when his fingers finally slid between my folds, dragging lightly over my slick clit. I arched against his hand, trying to ride it the way I wanted to, but he didn't give me what I wanted.
"Did you fuck him in our house?" he asked, his voice low.
"No. He'd never been there until you met him."
"Did he wear a condom?"
"Yes," I groaned. "Obviously. Wolves are super fertile, and I wasn't risking anything with him."
"Did you snuggle?" There was more of a growl to his voice now than before. He cared more, about the answer to this question.
"No. We went running afterward."
He stroked my clit lightly. Just once.
I could've cried, it felt so good.
"You had to burn off energy after fucking him?"
"Unfortunately."
Niall made a noise of carnal satisfaction. "I should kill him anyway. Would that get his mark off your skin?"
"You're really bothered about that mark."
"You're mine, Livvy. And I don't fucking share."
"Maybe you're the one who's mine."
"Of course I am." He dragged his finger over my clit again, one more time, and my hips bucked. "Why didn't you tell me about fated mates before?"
"Do we have to do this right now?" My body was still arching, fighting for more, and he was only giving me enough to keep me moving for him.
"If you want to come, we do."
"You're the worst."
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"I thought you'd leave."
He pressed down hard on my clit. "Why the fuck would you think that?"
I saw stars, but didn't come. "You were always so possessive.
I thought if you knew I probably belonged to someone else because of fate, that you'd leave.
Fae are told over and over as kids that we belong to whoever fate pairs us with.
We don't date. We definitely don't live with and fall in love with shapeshifters.
My family tried to get me to end things with you over and over at the beginning, but I couldn't. I'd never been so happy. "
"You never thought we might be mates?"
"You never asked me for a bargain. Soulmates always meet that way. They never start as friends."
"You thought we couldn't be fated because you loved me?"
"Yeah." I held his gaze, though his fingers had stopped moving and the need coursing through me was all-consuming. "Being with you was an easy decision, Niall. If it was my call, I would've chosen you over fate in a heartbeat. But I can't control my magic. Look at me. Look at us."
"I do, Livvy. I fucking love what I see."
"Well, I don't know how long we could've kept going the way we were. I don't know what will happen to either of us if I decide to forget about fate and agree to your ultimatum, either."
Niall studied my face. "Why didn't you ask me to bargain with you the first day we met? Or the first time we fucked?"
"Because I knew it would cost me you. And it did, didn't it? All of those times you came to my house and sat in your truck, and you didn't come to my door. You knew you could make me believe you. You knew that I loved you more than anything."
"I didn't stay outside because of fate."
"Don't lie to me, Niall. You're just as terrified as I am that we're not fated. You're just as terrified that I belong to someone else. That's why you're not willing to bargain with me, and it's why you know I can't agree to seal the mate bond without it."
Niall closed his eyes.
His jaw tensed for a long moment.
I'd gone too long without moving, but before my magic could make me uncomfortable again, Niall dragged his finger slowly over my clit, and I lost it.
I came with a desperate cry, wanting more. Needing more.
He didn't pull his hand away.
He knew that one orgasm was never enough to exhaust my magic.
"We can't seal a bond if I'm the only one who's risking anything," I panted, breathing heavily. "And I would be risking everything."
I'd only just started believing that he hadn't chosen Larson's life over mine—I wasn't ready to make that decision.
So I slipped his hand out of my shorts, and I squeezed it lightly. "Keep the paintings. No strings attached. We both know they're yours, anyway. I still have the fifth anniversary one at the house, and you can return my favorite bra some other time."
It was an offer, and a reminder that whatever we were wasn't over. Not completely.
We just... weren't ready.
Maybe we would be eventually.
Or maybe he would never bring it back.
This time, the ball was in his court.