Chapter 29 #2
I rolled my eyes at him. “And when would you do that? You're already busy enough as it is.” I narrowed my gaze on him. “Speaking of . . .”
Austin raked his fingers through his hair, but he sat back in his chair, studying me thoughtfully.
I hadn’t exactly planned to lecture him like everyone else was, but I felt the need to. His signs of burnout were getting much worse day by day. “You haven't actually taken anything off your plate yet.”
“I know,” he mumbled.
“You want to know how I know that?”
“How?”
“Because you and I turned our phone location sharing on, and I only ever see that you're home at night. During the day you’re all over Whynot. The hotel, the art gallery, the community center, the park, the store, your mom’s. Everywhere—all over the map.”
“Hey,” he quipped.
I took another bite of ramen, shrugging my shoulders. “You can't call it stalking if it's mutual and consensual.”
He let out a husky laugh, closing his eyes. “I guess that is true. No, I haven't taken anything else off my plate yet. I'm working on it. I just have too much to do. And now that I am dating again . . .”
“Something has to give,” I warned him. “I know that everyone gives you hell about overworking yourself, but there are actual side effects to burnout.
You're going to eventually hit a wall, and when that happens, everything else will fall apart.
You won't be able to get out of bed. You won't be able to feed yourself.
You won't be able to do anything for yourself.
I don't want that for you. Mostly because I know it would drive you insane, but also because I care about you, Austin. As a friend, and as someone who . . . cares about you as more than just a friend.”
He raked his fingers through his dark hair. The circles under his eyes were more noticeable in this light. He was frazzled and tired, and I just wanted to see him rested and healthy.
“I’m working on it. I promise.”
“Yeah,” I said softly. “I’m just warning you. Also . . . I was going to talk to Evie about this, but next time there is something that concerns her safety, I want to be part of that conversation.”
Austin immediately nodded. “Yes. Okay. I wanted that too. I didn't know what I was walking into. I did, admittedly, not tell everyone about Phil. I never expected him to show up in town. That is on me, but I would like for you and even Nick to be there next time. Evie and I mentioned it to each other too, it felt wrong without both of you there. I’m sorry, though.”
“It’s okay. I see you're warming up to Nick,” I said lightly.
He made a face, but he didn't immediately protest. Maybe that was some progress. Evie and I were so close to taking bets on how long it would take for the two of them to get over their little rivalry. Eventually, it would happen. The tension between them was thicker than a brick of butter.
“Anyway,” he continued, skipping over that little point. “I agree with you, and I'm sorry if you felt left out. I don't think Evie knew exactly what to do. I also told her I wish that she would've texted me when it happened.”
I nodded. “She should've texted the three of us. I'm glad Mateo was there. I've heard the full story a couple of times now. Obviously, I trust him to protect her. But I just wish we would've known. I'll talk to her too.”
He nodded, then folded his arms over his chest. “It'll work out. I'm not really sure what he's doing in town. Or why he thought it was okay to question her. But if he approaches you . . .”
“I wish he fucking would. If he approaches me, I’ll give him a piece of my mind.”
“If he approaches you,” Austin said pointedly, “you will also text us. Text all of us. It's weird that he's approaching anyone.”
“Is this you trying to boss me around, Whynot?”
“It's me trying to take care of people I care about,” he said. “And doing it in a way that isn't completely overbearing and overreactive.”
I wiggled a brow. “I’m proud of you.”
He groaned, but his body language completely relaxed. “I know I'm a mess sometimes.”
“Aren't we all? I certainly am today. Sometimes I have shifts that completely fuck me up, Austin. It's not like I share that with everyone, but if we're dating . . . You're going to see the worst of me.”
“If this is you at your worst, then you're doing just fine.
But I'm always happy to be here for you—I could not do the job that you do.
And I know that we're in a small town, but that doesn't mean there aren't bad emergencies that happen. Every now and then something tragic will occur, and it'll shake us all to our core.” His eyes darkened, his expression hollowing out. Given that he volunteered so often for the fire department, I knew he’d seen some bad situations firsthand.
“I know you've seen some bad shit,” I said.
He nodded slowly. He seemed to be thinking about something, and I wondered what it was.
“I have,” he said slowly. “That goes with volunteering as a firefighter and oftentimes being the first responder, depending on the staffing at the hospital.
But I'm very glad, almost every day, that I was not on call when my dad passed.
Mateo found him, and I know that it still haunts him, but I'm glad it wasn't me. I think that truly would've broken me.”
“It would break anyone,” I said softly. “I’ll never be used to death.
Especially tragic ones. Sometimes when someone is older and they've lived a full life, you can see the relief when they're ready to go. It is almost beautiful, although sad. But then there are other deaths that just break your heart. I never knew your dad, but I imagine it was the same way with him. It was too early.”
“It was too early,” he agreed. “But he was also hiding things from us and I think that that's what bothers me the most. I just wish I could've helped him while he was still alive.
I wish he would've shared those struggles with me.
He was always someone that was very open with us about other things, so it's been kind of like a slap in the face.”
“Well, parents don't always tell their children everything.”
I wrinkled my nose at the memory of my mother telling us, after her exams, that she was breast cancer free. None of us had even known there was a scare and the doctors suspected she might have it. I’d felt betrayed, especially as a doctor. Scared the fuck out of me, too.
“Your dad didn't want to burden any of you, and I can understand that. How is your mom doing? I see her occasionally, but it seems like she's been out of town more recently,” I said.
“She’s doing good. Much better since she started therapy and started taking vacations.
She likes cruises and stuff. She’s joined some groups that have given her new friends.
” His tone was warm, but then he winced.
“I’m going to bring all of you to dinner at some point, but since I yelled at her a couple weeks ago, things have been weird.
I feel bad about it, but sometimes she's difficult to handle. I know she means well. What about your parents? I want to meet your family.”
I smiled. “I have wonderful parents. I already invited Nick over for the holidays, but of course that could extend to you and Evie as well. You and Nick would have to behave.”
He chuckled. “I’m sure that we could behave. At least for a little bit.”
“Mm-hmm.” I finished the last of my soup and leaned back in my chair, warm and filled and much happier than I’d been only half an hour ago. “So, we’re dating, then?”
“I’d like to call you my boyfriend, yes.”
He was suddenly so shy and cute. A fuzzy warmth buzzed in my veins as I leaned across the table, intertwining our fingers together. “I’d like to be your boyfriend.”
“I’d like to be yours too,” he whispered.
My smile melted all my other worries away.
“Do you want to sleep over tonight?” he asked. “We can watch one of your nerdy movies.”
I laughed. Ever since they’d seen all my gamer stuff and books, Nick, Evie, and Austin had collectively decided I loved nerdy movies.
They weren’t wrong, though. All my favorite movies fell into that category.
“You say that as if you don’t also love nerdy movies,” I said. “And rom-coms. I’ve seen your watch list, Austin.”
“I’m not ashamed of my love for romance movies. Romance books? That’s Dallas’s thing. But give me a sappy film, and I’m happy.”
“I bet you’re a nightmare around the holidays. You’re going to make us watch all the cheesy movies.”
“I will,” he said. “Absolutely. And you can teach me how to play your card game.”
“We do not need someone else with that hobby,” I snorted. “It’s expensive. Let’s stick to buying new kink equipment and four-player board games instead.”
“I wonder if there’s a sexy version of Jenga.”
“Ooh.” I raised my brows, thinking about it. “I could make one . . .”
He wiggled his brows. “A doctor and a game designer.”
“A man of many talents.”
“Oh yes.”
I got up from my chair and went around the table, sliding into this lap. Austin sucked in a breath as I straddled his thighs, my hands settling on his broad shoulders.
“I want dessert,” I whispered.
“I’ll give you anything you want,” he murmured.
I smirked. “I bet you will, Whynot. I haven’t quite figured out where you lean when it comes to dominance or submission. Are you like Nick, hmm? A switch?”
“I think.” His voice was hoarse and ragged. I loved how he blushed for me. “I’ve kissed like two guys in bars. Years ago. Once in high school . . .”
I raised a brow. Surely he didn’t mean Nick, right?
“I’m not very experienced in BDSM, although I love it.
I want to try more. So all of that is to say, I’m still learning what I like and dislike.
I spanked Evie the other night with a paddle and put a blindfold on her, and god, I loved it.
I loved it so much. But when I’m with you, I just melt.
I can’t think of anything other than kissing you. ”
“Kissing me, hmm?” I started to rub the muscles between his shoulder and neck. He groaned, his head falling back as his eyes closed. I leaned down, kissing his throat. “Tell me what you think about after you kiss me.”
His breath parted his lips. I felt his cock hardening in his jeans, straining against the zipper and against me.
“Matt,” he croaked.
“Tell me, Austin,” I demanded. “Tell me every little fantasy in that mind of yours . . .”