Chapter 23
Chapter twenty-three
Kyren
The water washed over me. I barely felt the difference in temperature from that of the bathroom. In all honesty, I didn’t want to shower. I didn’t want to sleep. Or eat.
I just wanted to… see her.
I wasn’t getting less attached to Jack by staying away.
If anything, it made me want to see her even more.
Whether it was to kiss or kill her, I didn’t know.
But, knowing that Tate was getting to see her, touch her, taste her, while I stayed locked up in this house like some kind of recluse, was driving me crazy.
Of course, it didn’t help that I knew that hunter was there with her. Weaseling his way in where I belonged.
She was mine. Mine and Tate’s. Not his.
Even if they had something before, it was clear that it wasn’t going on now. I would have known or smelled him on her. Then again, she was able to hide her whole identity from me, and I had no clue until she walked into that auditorium and ripped the rug right out from under me.
My fist slammed onto the tiled wall next to the water fixtures, cracking the surface and leaving an imprint where my fist had been. My head bowed so that the water surrounded me on all sides.
Damn her and her family. Damn my heart for beating for her. If I could rip the part of her that had wiggled into it out, I would. Anything to stop feeling so tormented.
I had to make a decision. I couldn’t hide here forever. Maybe I should leave the country, go on an extended vacation.
Except there was Tate… would he go with me or stay with her?
He clearly still wanted to be with her, and I couldn’t fault him that. She made him happy, and I wanted nothing more than to make him happy. If being with Jack would do that, then I couldn’t take that away from him.
Either way, something had to give. I couldn’t continue on like this. I just didn’t know how to move forward.
A door slammed somewhere in the house. My head jerked toward the sound. The familiar sound of Tate’s footsteps moved through the house, heading in my direction.
He’d been down ever since his brothers left. His emotions came in waves of guilt and despair. Even though he had chosen me, it still ate at him to tell his brothers no.
Anticipating his appearance, I turned the water off in the showers and stepped out onto the rug. The door opened as I grabbed a towel to dry off with.
Immediately, I knew something was wrong.
Usually, if I was naked, especially wet and naked, Tate didn’t hesitate to let his gaze slide over me a hungry look in his eyes that said he wanted to lick every drop of moisture off my body.
I quite enjoyed his attention so, when he didn’t even so much as look at me when he walked into the bathroom, it was obvious something else was on his mind.
I dried my face and hair, watching him move to the toilet seat and sink down onto as if burdened by a heavy weight. His shoulders slumped inward, his head hung down, hands on his face.
Tate didn’t say anything. Just sat there. His pulse was faster than usual. His skin stunk of anxiety and sweats. Something had happened. But what?
He had no outward signs of an injury. No scent of his or anyone else’s blood on him. So it must not have been a physical altercation. The only other thing that could make him look and act like this was Jack.
I finished drying off, giving him a chance to collect his thoughts and talk to me on his own terms. But, when I’d finished, he still hadn’t broached the subject.
I grabbed the pants I’d laid out on the counter and pulled them on before kneeling in front of him.
“Mi lobo, what is it?” I spoke softly, not touching him in case it made his despair worse.
Tate shoved his braids back from his face, lifting his head so his gaze could meet mine. A mixture of sadness and worry etched across his face. He’d chewed on his lip ring so much that it was tearing at the skin around it.
Lifting my finger to my mouth, I pierced the tip with my fang, then swiped the blood around the lip ring, My blood healed the damage he had caused.
“I don’t know what to do, Kyren.” Tate’s voice was low and broken, like that of a child’s. “It all happened so fast. I didn’t understand what was happening until it was too late. Then I had to go to him. Which was so… humiliating.”
“Please, mi amore.” I placed my hand on the side of his face, giving him an encouraging smile. “Tell me what happened.”
Tate was quiet for a long moment, his emotions rampaging through our bond. “Don’t get mad.”
My brows furrowed, and my lips turned down.
Whenever Tate started a conversation like that, it meant that something happened to him that he didn’t think was a big deal, but I wouldn’t be happy about it.
It usually meant he knew I would get violent, and that only made me anxious to know what caused him to act this way.
“I mean it, Kyren.” Tate locked eyes with me, grabbing my shoulders. “You can’t freak out. It was an accident. She didn’t mean to do it. She’s probably as freaked out as I am, and I’m the one who got frozen.”
For a moment earlier, I thought I felt fear, but it was mixed with anxiety and, since he hadn’t call me, I chalked it up to more mixed feelings about his siblings. This must have been what happened.
I shook my head, trying to process what he was saying.
“Frozen? Did some witch attack you?” Anger started to well inside of me that someone would think that, because I wasn’t there, they could touch what was mine.
When it came to the wolves, I left Tate handle it. He knew how they worked and what would and wouldn’t keep the peace. But I wouldn’t let anyone hurt him, even if he thought it was an accident. In my experience, rarely was anything not done on purpose.
“No, no.” Tate shook his head. “No witches. Look, I don’t think I should tell you. You’re just going to freak out and then go attack her. And she doesn’t need that right now. I mean, if I found out I inherited my dad’s powers, I’d be freaking out too. Plus there were all the dead crows.”
He sighed, anguish in his voice. “I just wish she’d have stayed and talked to me.”
The pieces were finally clicking together.
Jack. This was all about Jack. She did something to Tate. Hurt him.
Suddenly, all that rage I’d been suppressing for her family came roaring back. Of course this was her fault. Her family’s fault. It always came back to the Durands. Doing whatever they wanted without worrying about the consequences.
I didn’t care who the hell she was, no one hurt what was mine. No one. Not even her.
“Kyren.” Tate grabbed at my arms, trying to keep me down. “I know that look in your eyes. Leave it. It wasn’t her fault. She didn’t know. You should have seen her face. She was terrified. Just don’t do anything rash.”
I could barely hear him over the rage pulsating through me. My shadows swirled around me, my jaw clenching. I’d been looking for an answer to what I should do about her all this time.
In the end, it came down to this—did my feelings for her negate all the negatives?
Now I had my answer. She’d hurt someone that was mine, someone that loved her. That made what I had to do quite clear.
“Let me go,” I commanded through clenched teeth.
“No,” Tate snapped, his fingers digging into my arms. “I won’t let you hurt her.”
“Stop making excuses for her,” I shot back. “She hurt you. I can’t let that stand.”
Tate grabbed my hands and placed them on his chest, rubbing them along his body. “No, look. See? I’m fine. She didn’t hurt me. I’m good.”
But I was done listening. I let my shadows envelop me, pull me out of Tate’s grasp, and transport me back to the academy.
The campus was busy with students milling about getting ready to blow off some steam before classes started up again. I didn’t bother walking through them to find her. I let my shadows pull me through the campus, checking all the places I knew she could be hiding.
I popped back into a hallway and inhaled, searching for her scent among the cluster of others. It took a moment, but I eventually picked hers out. It was recent.
Following the scent, I ignored everyone who came up to me or tried to get my attention. I only had one goal in mind right now and that was finding her.
Her scent led me to a higher part of the academy, one that students weren’t allowed in. Apparently, that rule did not apply to the daughter of the academy’s founders.
Along with her scent lingered that of the hunter, which only drove to push me toward her faster. My shadows were completely out of control around me now, casting the hallway in a dark fog.
I stared at her door for a moment before bypassing it all together. I stepped out of the shadows and into her room. It was larger and better furnished than the dorm room she shared with Tate.
Heavy blackout curtains covered the windows, but someone had parted them enough to let a few beams of light into the room, keeping it from being completely dark.
My eyes slid over the room, searching the dimly lit room until they settled on the lump on her bed.
My fingers curled into fists at my side. The need for violence and blood roared through my body. I took the first step and then the next until I was next to her side of the bed. She had the covers up over her face, which made sense for a coward like her.
Using Tate. Jerking him around like he was some kind of plaything only to hurt him in the worst way possible. No more beating around the bush. This wasn’t just for Tate, this was for me. Justice for Kleon. To show the Durands that they couldn’t take someone away from me without paying the price.
She had to die. Now.
My hand reached out, fingers curling around the top of the covers. Drawing them down, I poised my shadows to launch at her.
She was quick. It would be hard to surprise her. My shadows would restrain her while I bleed her dry. Or better yet, I’ll rip her head from her body, the same way her mother did to Kleon.
The covers came down, my fangs aching for something to sink into, my shadows ready.
But I made a mistake.
I wasn’t prepared to face her.
One look at her and everything changed.
Even in the dim light, I could see the puffiness around her eyes.
The strain on her face, her brow furrowed as she fought with some unseen force.
She curled up into a tiny ball, wearing a t-shirt too large for her.
The loose material of the collar was wrapped in her hands, and she held it to her face as if it was the only thing that could bring her comfort.
On closer inspection, I realized the shirt she was wearing… was mine. Even with us apart, even with us at odds, her on one side and me on the other, still she clung to me for comfort while she slept. The same way she did when I would sneak into her room every night to keep the nightmares away.
That anger inside of me lost its edge. The pain I felt multiplied, but the focus changed from mine to hers.
Tate had been right. Whatever happened, she was as upset about it as he was. This wasn’t a woman who wanted to hurt Tate.
And I couldn’t in good conscience use this moment to take my revenge on her family. Not with her looking like that. Not with her wearing my shirt.
She groaned in her sleep and shifted, her arms reaching out as if she knew I was there.
I stepped back from the bed. My eyes lingered on her, an ugly ache in my heart begging me to climb into the bed beside her and give us both the comfort we desperately wanted.
Instead, I let my shadow stroke the side of her face once, then turned and disappeared, leaving my anger there on the floor with so much regret.