Chapter 10
If I hadn’t already been completely fascinated by this little siren, then I certainly was the moment she stormed into our living room and attacked Sarah, that scheming beast, like a fury. Only wearing her long nightshirt, her curls wild and loose.
Completely caught off guard, I stare at her, unable to intervene. But I don’t need to, because she’s handling it.
My sister appears in the doorway, a deep satisfaction on her face as she watches Amelia defend herself against Sarah.
I have to admit, I find Goldilocks’ outburst incredibly hot, and I almost feel something like pride. That confuses me as much as the strange feeling I had two hours ago when she fell asleep in my arms from exhaustion and adrenaline crash. In my arms. Even though I’m supposed to be the enemy.
She looked so delicate and fragile that I didn’t want to let her go.
In that moment, it became clear to me that I would kill anyone who came near her. It’s that simple.
Reluctantly, I handed her over to Lizzy and Lincoln when we arrived here, as I had to deal with Robins, the press, and Damien.
So, Lizzy stayed with Amelia while I took care of everything else, trying to minimize the damage.
Luckily, Eric had already done a thorough job, and it looks like nothing will go public.
Cedric brought Damien to my city apartment. He’s doing as well as can be expected.
Thinking about how lost and broken Amelia and Damien looked made me feel sick, a nasty twist in my chest.
But that was forgotten the moment Goldilocks stormed into the living room like a little firecracker.
I’m not surprised she overheard everything, since I had only left the door ajar so I could hear if she woke up, and Sarah certainly wasn’t quiet.
What that bitch said is complete bullshit, and there’s no way she thinks I’d believe a word of it. But Amelia wants to make it very clear that it’s not true, and I can’t help but smirk a little as she grabs Sarah and slams her against the wall.
Damn, that’s hot, and I didn’t expect that from her, but I can see she’s raging. I understand her reaction. It’s too much for her. She needs to release that pent-up anger, and Sarah deserves no less, so I let it happen.
Just as I cross my arms and lean against the shelf, a sentence reaches my ears that makes me freeze.
“Listen here, Miss Know-It-All, I didn’t order that bigoted asshole Robins there, and certainly not that crazy psycho Richardson. He’s the one responsible for Phil’s death. So don’t you dare spread that crap about me. Got it?”
What?
WHAT?
My first thought is that I misheard, but I didn’t.
Richardson?
My thoughts whirl wildly, and my gaze slides to Amelia, who’s in the process of tearing Sarah apart.
What does she mean by that?
Adrenaline rushes through me like a waterfall, and it feels like I’ve been struck by lightning.
Richardson is responsible? What the hell?
I don’t wait a second and step in, grabbing her and taking her back to the bedroom, not before making sure Lizzy and security deal with that scheming beast.
So now here we are. Amelia swallows visibly.
“What do you mean Richardson is responsible for Phil’s death?
” I ask dangerously quietly, fixing my gaze on the little wildcat in front of me.
Her blue eyes drill into mine, and I immediately lose myself in them again.
The turmoil settles, and I have no damn idea what’s going on except that she looks beautiful all upset and out of herself.
I have to focus not to drift off in a completely different direction.
Amelia returns my gaze defiantly, but my question makes her pale.
“I… damn. I didn’t want you to know this already,” she mutters quietly, more to herself, but doesn’t avoid my eyes.
“Why?”
That’s the only question I ask because I have to keep the growing disappointment in check. It’s incredibly frustrating that she doesn’t communicate openly with me, though I can understand it.
“Because I can’t prove it,” she answers simply.
“When we had that press conference and I saw Richardson laughing, everything came back. He followed us with a colleague. Well, I assume it was a colleague, because he was in the passenger seat. On the day of the accident, he followed us for quite some time. Phil was upset, angry, and hurt because…” She suddenly breaks off.
Her hands nervously fiddle with the blanket.
She avoids my gaze, that’s clear. And even though I’d like to shake her until she tells me why Phil was so stressed, that’s not the point right now.
I nod encouragingly, and she continues hesitantly.
“Well, anyway, Richardson followed us from the castle. We were supposed to meet at the Diners Club to officially announce the engagement. He had been on our tail from the start, but suddenly he pulled alongside us. I yelled at Phil to watch out because the car was way too close, but that asshole just smiled maliciously and took pictures. With flash. That blinded Phil, and he swerved too sharply, causing us to skid. Richardson just kept driving. That bastard saw us go off the road and just drove away. I—I must have fainted briefly because when I opened my eyes we were already against the tree. He just left us there to die, Nicolas. And I can’t prove he was even there.
” Her voice now trembles, and I see tears drip onto her hands.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
Hate races like fire, like molten lava, through every pore of my body. I don’t doubt her words for a second, and I’d love to wipe that bastard off the face of the earth immediately. But she’s right. As long as we can’t prove anything, my hands are tied.
Imagining how my brother and she fought for their lives while that selfish bastard just took off turns my stomach.
“Hey Goldilocks, look at me.” I gently tap her under her chin, and she reluctantly lifts her head.
By God, I swear if I get my hands on that bastard, I’ll kill him with my own hands.
Her eyes shimmer moist with tears, but it’s the expression in them that gets to me, almost bringing me to my knees.
Amelia is suffering. She’s suffering, and the hopelessness in her eyes breaks me.
I don’t think, I just act, sitting down fully beside her on the bed and pulling her onto my lap, wrapping my arms around her delicate body and holding her tight.
At first, she stiffens completely, and I expect her to free herself any second, but then she claws into my shirt and her body starts trembling uncontrollably.
Her sobbing digs deep into my heart, and I feel her pain intensely.
Phil was my brother. Is my brother. But he was supposed to become her husband.
Losing a boyfriend, being forced into marriage, and made a scapegoat by the press, plus a future husband who constantly messes up. The pressure weighing on her delicate shoulders is so immense she can’t bear it. It’s impossible.
An uncomfortable tightness wraps around my chest because I’m not innocent in her situation. On the contrary, I’ve made it worse.
“Shhh, everything will be alright, Lia. I promise you that. No one will hurt you anymore, okay? You’re safe here,” I murmur into her hair, and her body trembles slightly.
“Even from you?” she murmurs, half sobbing, and I laugh bitterly because she’s not wrong.
“Even from me, if that’s what you want. Besides, you’ve got the perfect watchdog. My sister would throw me to the wolves if I gave you any crap,” I remark dryly, and now she laughs quietly.
The sound runs through me, giving me goosebumps. And when she pulls away a little and looks up at me with those blue eyes that dig into the farthest corners of my soul, I know I’m screwed. Completely under her spell.
That little hopeful sparkle in them, the hesitant smile on her lips. Fuck, I have a huge problem because I know I will do anything to protect this woman on my lap. Even if it’s against myself.
“She really would. That’s why I love her. But…” She grows nervous again, and I stroke encouragingly over her waist, so she’ll keep talking. “…You believe me?” So cautious, so fragile. If I say the wrong thing now, she’ll shatter before my eyes.
“Yes, I do. And we’ll get the proof. I’ll have some men dig and drag everything into the light about that asshole. Including evidence that he caused the accident and wanted you to die there.”
I look at her seriously, and she nervously bites her lip. Damn, that’s innocent and sexy, and I have to be careful not to do the wrong thing.
“Okay. That’s… that’s good, I guess. I… I’m sorry for dumping all this on you.” Uncertainty and shame return, and she awkwardly crawls off my lap. I immediately miss her warmth, but I don’t want to intimidate her, so I let her go.
“You don’t have to be sorry. In two days, you’ll be my wife. You can always use me as an oversized tissue, Goldilocks,” I tease her and get a laugh in return. A real heartfelt laugh.
I stare at her, mesmerized, because I’ve only seen her face light up like this once before, and that was in The Purge. But this time it’s for me.
It hits me unprepared again, and my heart skips a beat.
Fuck.
How much her eyes shine when she gives a genuine smile.
“Thank you, Nicolas of Harlington. You’ve saved my ass more than once today. Maybe it won’t be so bad with you after all.” She looks at me, still smiling, and I swear the world could end right now and I’d be a happy man. All because of that smile.
Fuck.
I clearly have a problem.
Amelia is still asleep when I leave the castle the next morning and take a detour through the cemetery. And that’s probably for the best, because I don’t know how to deal with the latest development between us.
I wanted to pounce on her and devour her completely, but I’m pretty sure she wouldn’t be too thrilled about that. So I had to get out. Also, I have a few things to take care of.
I stop in front of our crypt and stare silently ahead for a long time. My heart still refuses to accept that he will never laugh again. Never ride a motorcycle again, never be angry at me again. The tightness in my chest grows heavier and it hurts. It aches endlessly.
“I miss you, big brother. I could really use you right now, because I keep messing up one thing after another. Especially with Amelia,” I say into the void, and I know it sounds ridiculous, but it feels like he’s still here.
But he isn’t. He never will be. And that realization always makes the grief and despair about how unfair everything is flood back again.
“You know, an instruction manual for her really wouldn’t have been bad.
Although I have to admit that I was wrong about her.
In many ways. But what am I supposed to do now?
You took so many secrets with you. So many that I don’t know how to unravel everything.
They’re crashing around my head so hard right now that I don’t know which way is up.
” I take a deep breath in and out, briefly run my hand over my face.
“I’m the worst possible successor you could have had, and I have no idea how to do this without you.”
“By simply doing it. Phil didn’t do it any differently either. He didn’t have a guide on how to do it right,” Damien’s rough voice sounds behind me, and I slowly turn to him.
“You look like shit,” I let him know as I glance over him briefly. His face is completely bruised, one eye swollen shut, but the cut is cleanly bandaged. He stands next to me, moving quite stiffly. I can see he’s in pain.
“What are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be in bed?” Actually, I’m surprised to see him here at all—he’s avoided me for weeks.
Damien looks at me sideways, and his gaze is so torn and full of pain that I automatically clench my fist to keep my own grief and anger in check.
“Phil wasn’t just my friend, Nic. Your brother was the love of my life. And I betrayed him.”
I stand there hearing his words, taking in exactly what Damien is saying, but my mind needs a moment longer to process. Then it hits me like a cold wave, and in an instant, I am swept away by the force of a tsunami. I was completely unprepared for it.
“What? What are you saying?” My voice sounds strangely hollow, and Damien grimaces painfully as my steely gaze lands on him.
“Your brother was gay, Nic. Just like me. We had been a couple for over a year. Only Amelia knew, no one else.”
The blood in my veins starts to boil, the bitter taste of betrayal and disappointment spreading through my body. Not because my brother and he were a couple, no. Because they didn’t trust me with it. Because they kept it from me, and because Amelia has been keeping it from me.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Now I definitely sound cold, and I know I’m hurting my best friend with that, but dammit, it hurts.
That I obviously wasn’t worthy to share that happiness with them hurts so damn much, and I can no longer think rationally or logically.
It hits me hard, and my shields go up, even if it’s unfair to Damien.
“We wanted to. Believe me. It almost killed your brother not to tell you. But the situation for people like us kept getting worse. Your father… the political climate, you… I’m sorry,” he answers weakly, looking at me pleadingly.
I want to tell him it would have been completely fine with me, that I would have even been really happy for them. But I can’t. The feeling of being betrayed has already spread like poison in my veins.
“Amelia wanted…”
Yes, Amelia.
That she kept it from me, let me believe my brother was the love of her life, feels disgustingly bitter and almost even worse.
“Keep her the hell out of this. I’ll deal with her later.
You’re my best friend, Damien. You know everything, really everything about me.
Fuck. This is really hard. I… sorry, but I need to digest this first,” I cut him off sharply, no longer willing to listen.
The reasons are flimsy, and I don’t want to hear them.
Not now.
And as for my fiancée: Well, Goldilocks, we definitely need to have another serious talk.