37. What Can I Say? Emotions Ran High
Icouldn’t see a thing inside the cave. Darkness pressed against my straining eyeballs with a weight that made them ache. Blind as I was, my other senses sharpened. Every padding footstep was like a drum beat, marching us onward. Unyielding ridges of stone pressed through the soles of my boot. The damp mist of the rushing river, cool against my skin. Idris, warm and solid at my side. He smelt like the sky, cold and bright and fresh. I knew he could see, knew he wouldn’t lead us straight over the edge of a gaping chasm, or into the river, but I couldn’t help but imagine it. If the river claimed us, if we washed up in that shallow pool, maybe I’d just give up. I’d accept that Neath owned me now, and I’d stop trying to get away.
But, of course, Idris made no such error. Sure footed and steady, he led me toward my home. It was a good thing he’d found me. I would never have found my way without his sharp fae eyes.
Idris stopped dead, tugging me tighter to his side. The air came alive, like thousands of tiny ants were marching over every inch of my skin, making every hair stand on end. I recognised the charge a moment before a flicker of blue-white light blazed against my retinas. Squinting, I hissed in displeasure, but my eyes adjusted. Idris’ spare hand was once more wreathed in threads of electric light, only glaring because of the sheer density of the darkness.
To my immense horror, his bright hand rose up and over his shoulder, casting a glow over his hair, and closed around the hilt of one sword. Only one, because his other hand had tightened around mine. I couldn’t have let go even if I’d wanted to. The blade rang faintly as he drew it, and by the time he’d brought it out in front of him, the metal was alive with electricity.
“What’s wrong?” I demanded in a whisper.
His eyes gleamed like ghosts as they darted over the now faintly illuminated cave walls and ceilings, high above. Here and there, brighter spots and darker shadows stood out against the flickering light.
“Nothing. Just vampires.”
“Vampires?” Fuck me, were those eyes glowing down on us? Were the creeps clinging to the ceiling like bats? I shuddered at the thought of them scurrying overhead.
“It’s called the Blood Gate for a reason. There’s a coven down here.”
“Now you tell me?” My whisper rose to a squeak. I might have formed a foolhardy trust with Jacques, but he’d always had his motives to fight against his own instincts. This lot though? I was a banquet, dangled before the starving.
“Don’t worry. They won’t come near.”
Easy for him to say. He wasn’t natural prey, a veritable blood bank, ripe for drinking. He might be as much a predator as the monsters crawling the walls, but it didn’t mean the vampires weren’t desperate. Centuries of hunger might outweigh their fear of one fae prince. They might risk taking him down if it meant getting to me.
“Besides, I thought you liked vampires?” A hint of amusement danced in his voice.
“You are not funny, Idris.”
“I happen to disagree.” With his blade poised, the prince continued his resolute trek, dragging me with him.
I hunched my shoulders, trying not to catch the gleaming eyes of anything, but I could feel their hungry stares raking over me. I wanted to burrow under Idris’ arm and squeeze my eyes shut, and stay like that until we came out the other side. Instead, with my heart thudding and my breath short, I took one step, and then another.
Idris gave my hand a reassuring squeeze. I tightened my own grip and didn’t loosen it again.
Whose idea had it been to put a rift down here anyway? A more chilling thought occurred to me. Who had thought to locate their coven right beside a rift, and why? Easy pickings? As far as I could see, it wasn’t the most desirable location. Before the rifts had closed, humans had come and gone all the time. I couldn’t imagine many had made it through the warren of the Blood Gate unscathed. And worse, how many vampires had used the rift to cross to my world? Had they hunted there? The puncture wounds on my neck began to burn, but I resisted the urge to let go of Idris and rub my dressing.
It was a miracle I’d lived long enough to meet Jacques at all. Had I drifted down this river, unconscious, before emerging into the sunlight? I’d thought myself lucky not to have drowned, but I’d never before grasped the true extent of my good fortune.
“Aliza. You’re cutting off my blood supply.”
“Oh. Oh! Sorry.” I hastily loosened my fingers, but only slightly. There was no chance in hell I was risking being dragged away by some fanged beast.
But Idris was right. Though I glimpsed movement and bright eyes, nothing approached as we picked our way through the caves. We were left unhindered as the ground began to rise.
Before long, I could barely hear my own thoughts over a relentless crashing roar of water, and I stopped to stare in wonder as Idris’ light illuminated an underground waterfall, at least five times as tall as either of us. The path veered off around a wide pool, before twisting up the far wall at a steep incline, but Idris didn’t follow it. He led me over rocks and boulders, waiting patiently as I scrambled up them, and holding my hand steady as I hopped down. By the time we reached the waterfall, I was flushed, and the icy spray came as a blessing.
It was too loud to speak, but Idris jerked his head, and together, we crept around the water’s edge, pressing against the cliff face, and squeezed behind the curtain of black water, edged in blue-white light. A cave within a cave lurked behind the fall. The air was different here. Heavy. Hard to breathe. The sickly-sweet aroma of mold wafted up my nostrils, and I wrinkled my nose, wishing I actually couldn’t breathe.
All at once, my feet slipped from under me. I lurched, grabbing onto Idris, but the world tilted anyway, spinning around me.
Then it stopped.
My feet were planted firmly on the ground, and everything was dark and damp and disgusting, just as it had been a moment ago, but I knew that everything had changed. Gone was the roar of the falls, and though darkness still pressed on me, Idris’ light had sputtered out. I didn’t need to see. Everything was bleakly familiar, right down to the stench.
“Is this…”
“We’ve crossed over,” Idris answered my unspoken question. “You’re home.”
Well, not quite. “Can you still see?”
Idris huffed a laugh, but I couldn’t bring myself to smile. “Of course I can.”
“Good, because believe it or not, I don’t live in a cave.”
“Understood.”
We began to walk again, and with every step, the cave lightened. My boot sloshed through a puddle, and I grimaced. Before long, I caught a glimpse of the Fairy Glen beyond the cave. It was…
“Daylight?” How long had we been wandering the Blood Gate? It couldn’t be dawn already.
We emerged to a dismal, cloudy day. Typical English weather. Was it my imagination, or had all the colours faded while I’d been away, like a veil of translucent grey had been draped over the world? Or was it only that I’d never been exposed to the full spectrum until I’d arrived in Neath? Either way, the sight of the deserted glen didn’t fill me with the same sense of joyous homecoming I’d anticipated. Even the birdsong seemed shrill, drilling into my head.
My stomach swooped at the sight of a decaying mound of bouquets, piled against the cave walls. I didn’t need to read the cards to know they were for me. Faded pastel ribbons hung limp and dirty from the trunks of nearby trees.
“So, this is the human world?” Idris muttered, and I became aware for the first time since leaving the cave that he was still holding my hand.
I twisted to peer up at him. He surveyed the glen, giving no indication of his thoughts. “It’s not much, I admit. And believe it or not, this is actually one of the nicer parts, not including the smell.”
A faint smirk tugged at the corner of his mouth before he turned to face me. “Well, here we are.”
“Yeah.” I should let go of his hand. Instead, tears sprang to my eyes and my grip tightened. “I suppose this is goodbye. Just so you know, I hate goodbyes, and I’m definitely going to cry.”
“I’m not too fond of them either.”
“Idris…” This was it. Time to find something inspiring and profound to say, something that he’d carry with him for the rest of forever. A way for me to help him through the dark, even after I’d gone. I took a deep breath, opened my mouth, and promptly dissolved into tears.
Finally, I tugged my hand free, burying my face in my palms. Something huge and warm and smelling of a sky much brighter than this one wrapped around me. I sagged against Idris’ chest, letting his strong arms take some of the weight from my legs.
“Well… that was quick,” he murmured against my ear.
I tried to shove him, but the smug bastard’s arms were clamped too tight for me to move. Still, through my tears, I managed a small smile. “I did w-warn you.”
A broad hand swept over my hair, cradling the back of my head, holding me close. To think, barely weeks ago he’d seized me by the throat and berated me for being a liability, and now…
“Will you actually miss me?”
He snorted. “If you mean will I think of irritating mortals every time I’m trying to enjoy a moment of peace, then yes, probably.”
“Good,” I said, leaning back to scowl at him. “Because I’ll think of you whenever I have to deal with someone who can’t handle their alcohol.”
“Listen, I drank a lot of wine that night, alright? It’s strong stuff.”
The smile his words coaxed out of me faded almost as soon as it bloomed. Just because I wasn’t going to be there to help him, it didn’t mean he couldn’t save himself. “Maybe I shouldn’t ask for this, but I want you to try to live, Idris.” His expression froze, his eyes turning distant. He tensed beneath the hands I now noticed were pressed against his chest. I didn’t dare pull away, not now that I’d started such a difficult conversation. “I want you to stay away from the wine, and to find things that make you feel happy and glad to be here. I know it won’t be easy, but… try. Please. You’re a good person, and I can’t stand to imagine a world without you.”
He didn’t speak, only stared down at me, unmoving. Was he even breathing?
“Find-find someone, yeah? You’re a prince. How hard can it be? Fall in love.”
He shook his head fervently. What was he saying no to? Everything, or just the last part?
Finally, he swallowed. When he spoke, his voice was gruff. “Has anybody ever told you how incredibly annoying you are, meddling in things that don’t concern you?”
“Idris—”
“Fine. I make no promises, but I… I’ll try.”
Relief washed through me. “Thank you, because I know it doesn’t feel like it now, but you will be happy again. And… Thank you for everything you’ve done for me. I’ll never forget it.”
“It was nothing.”
“I’d have died a hundred times over if it wasn’t for you. And I’d definitely never have ridden a flying horse, or found my way home.”
“It was the least I could do.”
“No. The least you could do is smile for a photo.”
He rolled his beautiful eyes, an incredibly human gesture from such a haughty beast. “You’re infuriating.”
“That makes two of us.” I fished my phone out of my pocket, pivoting under his arm still wrapped around my shoulders. He didn’t fight as I nestled beside him and held out the camera.
“Smile,” I reminded him through my own bared teeth.
As I’d expected, he only glowered at the screen like a Goddamn runway model, but it was distraction enough. My free hand slipped around his neck, and before he could react, I hooked a finger into the corner of his mouth, pulling his lips back from his teeth.
I snapped away, howling with laughter as he jerked his head out of reach with a sound of sheer disgust. Tears rolled down my face, blurring my vision, but I kept on hitting the button, determined to catch at least a hint of emotion on his beautiful, miserable face.
“That was utterly revolting. When did you last wash your hands?”
My wheezing intensified. God, I was funny, and Idris was beyond help if he couldn’t see it.
When I regained a shred of composure, I mopped my wet eyes and found the brooding prince standing with his arms crossed and an expression of deepest disapproval.
“Oh, come on, that was hilarious.”
“You think so?”
I grinned at his glowering face as I slid my phone into my pocket. “I know so, and so do you.”
Idris lunged.
Quicker than my brain could process, he was right in front of me. He seized my face, forcing my head back, and before I had time to suck in half a gasp, his lips collided with mine.
Every thought fled from my head, scattered by the surge of electricity that rushed through my body, rooting me in place. Idris ran his tongue over my lips, and without thinking, without even trying to resist, I parted them for him. He deepened the kiss, pressing closer until his body was flush against mine, warm and solid and delightfully large. Beside him, I was small and delicate, something I’d never felt in my life.
His tongue swept into my mouth, deep and insistent, claiming. The last of my defences melted away. I didn’t care where I was, or who I was, or even that I’d been tempted to tangle with his twin. All that mattered was Idris’ dizzying touch, and the rapidly pooling heat low in my belly. Everything he gave, I matched. My hands slid around him, clinging, as my tongue dragged over the tip of one fang, sharp enough to threaten pain. My needy little whimper sounded into his mouth at the sensation.
The prince blew a breath out of his nose and slid a hand around the back of my neck, burying his fingers in the base of my ponytail. With it, he steered my head, arching me further back until my body was crushed against his. Stars sputtered behind my eyelids, glimmers of popping light, mirrored by the cascade of tingles simmering over every inch of my skin.
Idris pulled away, leaving air where there should have been only his lips against mine. I might have leaned forward, seeking touch, if not for his hand still fisting my ponytail. My eyes fluttered open to find his face barely an inch from mine. Golden green scorched down to my soul. The green was a colour I’d never seen on any human. This close, I saw that the golden sheen came from threads and flecks of yellow, weaving into the green. Beautiful.
“See?” he breathed.
Oh, I could see alright. See the haze of desire in his eyes, telling me he’d enjoyed that unexpected moment as much as I had. Telling me he wanted more. My tongue darted over my bruised lips. Idris tracked the movement, his pupils flaring.
“It’s impolite to stick things in people’s mouths,” he pressed, though he didn’t sound convinced.
“Maybe you should teach me some manners.” Maybe another kiss would do it. Maybe it would take more than that.
His hand tightened in my hair, but it wasn’t my scalp that twinged in response.
“Maybe I’ll have to stick something else in your mouth next time.”
“Maybe I’ll like that.”
A sound, something between a snarl and a groan rumbled in Idris’ throat, and a thrill of triumph raced up my spine. I’d done that to him. I’d dragged that noise from him. What other sounds could I coax forth? The heat between my thighs turned to a throbbing pulse at the thought of it, of watching him come undone at my touch.
I dragged my hands to his front, sliding one between our bodies, and down, down. Abs rippled beneath my palm, tensing as I went lower. My fingers snagged his belt, but I shifted my hips, making room, and continued my descent.
The prince sucked in a sharp breath as I palmed him through the fabric separating us, his eyes burning unflinchingly into mine. I was the one to blink in surprise, or maybe awe.
The size of him.
He was rock hard, straining against the trousers holding him at bay, and huge. Every man I’d ever known faded into insignificance as my heart galloped against my ribs. What would he feel like, buried in my body?
“Don’t look at me like that.” His voice was low and as ragged as his breath.
“Why not?”
“Because I’m this close to dragging you back through the rift and keeping you forever.”
Forever.
Cold sweat beaded my neck as the blood drained from my head. I hastily withdrew my hand. Idris’ face tightened in panic. He released his hold on my hair, allowing me to retreat, placing a few steps of safety between us. I wrapped my arms around my body, shielding myself from that piercing gaze.
What was wrong with me? What was I playing at? After weeks of longing, I was back in my own world. My old life was within my grasp. I shouldn’t be fooling around with some supernatural creature, least of all Idris. I had no intentions of forever.
“I apologise.” The prince’s perfect face was stricken with dismay. “I should never have kissed—I didn’t mean anything by it. It was a joke, a stupid joke. I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine!” My voice came out unnaturally cheery and bright. “I’m sorry too. I got carried away. I don’t know what came over me.” My ears were aflame. God, had I really touched him like that?
He gave a single bark of false laughter. “Nor me. Perhaps the lack of sleep—”
“Yes!” I seized the excuse. Anything to brush what had just happened under the carpet. “We’re delirious, that’s all it was.”
Idris’ shoulders sagged and a relieved smile spread over his face. He began to chuckle, and I was powerless to stop my own sheepish grin.
Thank God. How bad could things be if he was laughing? “Well, this isn’t awkward at all.”
“I agree,” he said, his eyes dancing with amusement. “Thank the Mother I never have to see you again.”
“Exactlywhat I was thinking.” It was a lie. Forever and never were equally terrifying prospects. Both final. Both absolute. I didn’t want either.
“Well, on that note…” Idris’ face softened. My stomach dropped. This was it. He was going to say goodbye, for real. I wasn’t ready.
“Have a happy life, Aliza.”
I forced a small smile. “I’ll do my best.” Right now, it seemed an impossible task. I took a deep, wobbling breath. “Bye, Idris.”
The prince stepped closer, and closer, until he was right in front of me again. My body hummed at the proximity, as though he was calling to every part of me. I half expected, and maybe hoped, that he would pick up where we’d left off, but he only cupped my face in one broad, cool hand, and pressed a kiss to my hair. “Goodbye, Aliza with an A.”
I held my breath, determined to keep control of my sadness as he pulled away. His eyes were shining as he gave me one last half smile and turned to leave. He walked back the way we had come, past the pile of withered flowers. He didn’t look back as the darkness of the cave swallowed him whole.
Gone.
My heart drifted down to my boots, where it lay heavy and aching. It was over. Everything. My whole unwilling adventure, which had seemed unsurvivable at times, had come to an end. There would be no fairies, or witches, or vampires. No more fae.
Brushing my fingers over my tender lips, I turned away from the cave, trundling through the damp grass. I wanted to feel relieved, happy, excited even. I was finally going home. My steps weren’t supposed to be as heavy as my heart.
I should probably call my parents.
Sure enough, my phone had service. I smiled, unlocking the screen, only to find my camera still open. A little circle at the bottom of the screen showed a tiny photo of me and Idris. I tapped it.
A hand closed around my face, blanketing my mouth and nose, dragging me backward. My phone tumbled to the ground as I tried to scream. The sound died against the clamp of my captor. I grappled, trying to hook my fingers beneath the hand, but the air pressed in, heavy and black.
The Fairy Glen vanished.