16. Killian
Pride is another trick of modern society to trap you in its ploys. We’re expected to be proud of our accomplishments and to encourage people to reach the goals society wants us to achieve.
I’ve never tried to make someone proud of me, nor to be too proud of the people around me, until now.
Maricela faced her past. Maybe not all of it, but quite a big part of it. If nothing else, I now know the shocked woman in front of me is the first straw that broke my woman.
Lila stands here, staring at the door that just slammed behind her, refusing to look in my direction. Sometimes I wonder about her. Is she as dumb as she wants everyone to believe?
Lila has become more refined and more beautiful than ever over the past few years.
She’s an aboriginal of false elegance and class. Unlike Maricela, Lila is dressed in a high-cut black dress with blue flowers and carries a matching bag. I know for a fact that she wears heels to appear taller than her five-foot-five-inches.
“What are you doing here, Lila?” I bark, causing her to jump, but she recovers quickly.
Lila knows how to act with men like me. It’s her father who wanted her to know, after all.
“What am I doing here? You can’t be serious, Killian.”
She looks me in the eyes, something that a lot of men wouldn’t dare to do.
“I’m your capo. I’m holding you by those balls you think you have between your legs, honey.”
“You can’t be serious,” she says again, but this time, genuine anger comes out in her tone.
I don’t really give a fuck, and every second she’s here is a waste of my time.
“Even if you repeat the same phrase fifty thousand times, it won’t help you. I’m serious about everything I do, Lila. You should know that.”
I stare her down. She doesn’t budge.
“I gave you explicit instructions. Why did you leave the hotel? Your cock toy broke?”
I see what she’s about to do, and before she raises her dainty hand with her witch claws, I grab her hand and squeeze.
Lila shrinks like the sensitive little flower she is. All the petals have already fallen out of her, and just a few more pulls are needed for her to break completely. And she will break, I guarantee it.
“You’ve made a mistake,” I bark, sure that everyone can hear me.
“Kill... Killian,” she manages.
“You have no right to say my name,” I snap again.
Maricela once told me that my voice was naturally so low that she couldn’t imagine me yelling at anyone. I do now, however.
I want to humiliate Lila, bring her to her knees like she did to my fucking little girl. Scratch that. I want to take Lila down and destroy her and her whole family. Make her crawl on her knees in front of the woman who left my office because of her.
“You have no right to talk to me. You did more than you should have four years ago, Lila Knight.”
“I’ve apologized,” she says honestly.
She indeed apologized after I nearly tore her family’s business apart, after I ruined all her chances of starting the fashion magazine she wanted so badly to the point her father said that she would get her money only with my ring on her finger.
“I don’t understand what you want. I stayed by your side. I let you chain me like a prisoner for four years. I’ve paid for my actions, Killian.”
“You have not yet begun to pay for what you did, Dear Lila. I will decide when you finish paying for your actions. I will decide when and if at all, I will set you free to fuck whoever you want. Remember that you are the property of the Fierro family, bitch. Your entire family has always been our property.”
“It’s unfair,” she says in an honest-to-God whine.
“Fair? Was it fair when you drove Maricela away with lies and a video you took fraudulently? Was it fair to abuse my woman and put poison ivy in her panties? Or maybe it was fair that you didn’t get your wretched place in the food chain? You are the prey, and I am the predator. That has always been fact, and no matter what you do, this fact won’t change.”
“Killian, I can’t continue being locked inside that hotel.”
“At least you’re locked up in a hotel, unlike Maricela, who escaped into a fucking war zone because of you.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Your little video pushed her into signing on as a field photographer. She was in constant danger the four fucking years she wasn’t here, where she was supposed to be. And it’s because of you, you damn bitch!”
“Don’t talk to me like that. I don’t deserve it.”
The laughter that emerges from me is mean and lifeless—the laugh of a monster ready to avenge the people who touched the most precious thing he had. I may not deserve Maricela, but I will avenge her.
“Your humiliation has only just begun, Lila Knight. It would have been better if you hadn’t come here.”
“I’ll talk to your mother.”
I laugh even harder. My mother, Isabella Fierro, always tried to protect other women because she didn’t want any other woman to go through what she went through and is going through still.
Isabella tried to protect Lila from me a few times but stopped doing that as soon as she realized I wasn’t touching her and I wasn’t physically hurting her. Lila is a necessity but, in the end, a meaningless tool.
“As soon as Isabella hears what you did to Maricela, she will never forgive you. She might even demand that you be punished as well.”
That was a blow below the belt. Lila’s mother is a nasty bitch. Much worse than her daughter. She never sides with Lila or any woman, for that matter, because she never wanted girls.
Her mother is the most misogynistic woman on earth. She sees women as nothing but a hole meant to bear children. Lila is her fifth and youngest daughter.
The spoiled baby, the one who would give her everything as long as she got married and had children.
“My hand,” she whines. “You’re hurting me.” I squeeze her fingers tighter, and’ Maddox bursts into the office.
I drop her hand and take a deep breath to get my fury under control. Had Maddox not come in when he did, I probably would have done something I would regret. I don’t hurt women. That’s something that, no matter how many times Franco tried to beat it into me, he couldn’t do.
It’s not because I think they’re weaker, although physically they are, and most females are more vulnerable than someone like me. It’s because of Isabella.
I thought I would never be able to hurt a woman after what I witnessed happening to my mother, but it turns out I was wrong. I’ve killed women, a few that really deserved it. Unfortunately for Lila, she needs to stay alive.
“What’s going on here, Kill?” Madd’s voice is calm, but I can see the disapproval a mile away.
“Get this bitch out of here before I do something I’ll regret. Get her back to her hotel. Oh, and Maddox, ensure she doesn’t leave again until I tell her to.”
“Okay, Capo.”
He salutes and flashes me a toothy grin, the kind he used to aim at Franco. Great, now he’s mad at me too. Maddox and I agreed that we would never act like our sperm donor.
I fucked up.
“This is Mr. Killian’s diary,” Bertha tells Maricela with a motherly smile.
“It’s very organized, and there’s not much room for mistakes. I think you’ll do well in your role. It sounds like he likes you a lot. This is the first time I can recall him bringing someone here. You must be crucial to him if he organized the office for you.”
From where I stand, it doesn’t appear Maricela looks her in the eyes, and that doesn’t surprise me. Probably out of shame and embarrassment, assuming everyone heard her screams and pleas. My little girl will have to get used to that.
“We need to talk,” I say, causing Maricela to jump.
This is also new. Even though she never paid much attention to the people around her, she was always aware of her surroundings and always knew when someone was coming behind her. Odd.
“Mr. Fierro. I think we’ve talked enough for one day. I need to finish with all the things here and then go pick up the kids.”
“Very well. I hope you remember what I told you. Wait for me, and don’t you dare enter the shower without me.”
A spark of defiance and life stares at me through those bright blues and greens. The colors are no longer as dim as yesterday, sending a surge of satisfaction through me.
Every day, every hour, every moment, Maricela grows stronger before my eyes.
Soon, I will know everything. Soon, I will break you into pieces to rebuild you back again.
And soon, I, too, will pay for my actions.