7. Stella
STELLA
Something is wrong and it’s not just my beaten body.
I am shivering constantly, even while under the covers with my brain as foggy as shit.
It feels like I’m watching my body from somewhere above.
These bastards are drugging me with more of that poison, but how I don’t know.
The days are bleeding into each other and my body doesn’t feel like my own anymore.
I stink, even after taking a shower. I feel like bugs are crawling all over me at times, which explains all the scratches up and down my arms and legs.
While at other times I feel euphoric like I’m living in the perfect dream.
Is there shit in my food or are they shooting me up whenever I drop into a death-like sleep.
Knowing there are probably cameras everywhere, I get up and walk to the bathroom, closing the door slightly.
I turn the shower on and strip before I start searching my body for needle marks.
Nothing new on my arms that I can see, so I move to the mirror and start searching my body for marks.
When I don’t see anything visible, I sink down to the toilet seat to sit so I can try to think, while analyzing my entire body to see if anywhere on it feels weird.
After a minute or so I my neck feels like it’s been stretched or worked out a bit too much.
My gums are tender and on my left foot there is a slight burning between my big and second toe.
Thirty minutes later I’m beside myself and so pissed off I could probably kill someone with my bare hands.
My neck, between all my toes on the left foot, and there are faint marks on my thighs.
It’s all making sense now: the tiredness, lethargy, and lack of hunger though always thirsty.
Then like I thought before, an unnatural high at times making everything seem perfect.
And with thirst comes the feeling of being so dry I feel like sand is in my mouth.
At times, I’ve woken up to run into the bathroom put my head under the faucet and drink until I felt hydrated again.
It dawns on me that someone has to be manning the cameras, and if I’m in here too long, someone will most likely come looking for me, so I stand and walk into the shower.
Washing my entire body twice, I grab a towel to wrap my hair up and another to dry my body.
Just as I put my arms in the robe hanging on the back of the door, I hear the digital lock disengage.
Damn, thank God my brain is functioning enough to make it look like I was showering.
Though I’m glad as shit I’m not still in the shower because don’t need to give any of these perverts an open opportunity for their torture to go down another road with me wet and naked.
I’ve gotten myself in enough trouble already.
Without even thinking about it, I’m frantically scratching my arm when it finally dawns on me, I’m way on the road to being a junkie with a serious addiction to whatever drugs they are shooting into my body.
This has been their plan all along. Being so overwhelmed with what I just figured out, all I want to do is cry, but instead I open the door to see Gino and one of his right-hand guys sitting at the small table waiting.
I ignore both of them and walk to the bed, getting in, the tremors getting worse.
I hear Gino speak to the guy under his breath.
Once done, the guy stands while Gino comes toward my bed just as the guy walks out the door, closing it but not locking it.
Is this a test to see if I’ll take the bait, which is the door being unlocked.
Obviously they don’t know me because risks can get you killed.
I have a family to get back to. Just the sound of his voice nauseates and aggravates me at the same time.
My eyes move to where he is standing, leaning toward me.
Ugh, can’t let him know I figured out what they are doing to me, so I blank my face and wait, which I don’t have to do for long.
“Tesoro, what is bothering you so much that you cannot sleep? You know you can talk to me about anything. I’m always here for you. Please, Cara, don’t struggle and try to carry this all by yourself to prove what? How strong you are? We all need someone to lean on at times.”
Not sure what makes me say what comes flying out of my mouth, I know unconsciously it’s like that saying about “not poking the bear.” As usual, I have the problem of not taking a minute to go over my words, to think and form my sentences.
Nope, not me, I never think before I speak.
And that’s why I always get myself deeper into situations that fuck me up more.
Or that’s what Cullen has always told me.
“You’re right, Gino, we all need someone to rely on. Unfortunately, my person isn’t here so I am all alone, damn it. Unless you want to let me go so I can find Cullen, otherwise, just leave me alone. I’m tired and just want to try to go back to sleep.”
He shocks me when he growls at me, his eyes looking totally insane.
“Who the fuck is Cullen, Stella, and what happened between you and Incubus?”
Oh shit, did I just fuck up? Gino has no idea who Incubus truly is, and thank God for that.
Don’t need to open that beehive and involve his asshole father.
Trying to think of what to say, Gino again surprises me by grabbing my shoulders hard, then starts shaking me.
What the hell? is my thought, right before it all becomes crystal clear.
“Puttana, if you are with someone else, then I don’t have anything to hold over that insane bastard Incubus’s head. I will not have the leverage I thought was in my hand. Explain now, Stella, don’t make me beat it out of you. I prefer not to put my hands on a woman in anger.”
By the look on his face, I don’t doubt if he had to that he could put some damage on me.
I mean, he’s bigger in height and weighs more than me, but I’m younger and generally more fit, due to working out for my profession.
That’s probably the reason why he ordered the drug protocol for me.
To weaken not only my body but also my mind.
Well, you old fucker, think again. I’ll fight going down and even then will muster up some strength until I’m taking my last breath. I take one in and then give it to him.
“Chill out, Gino. Cullen and Incubus are one and the same person, for Christ’s sake.
Are you telling me the all-knowing mob Don doesn’t even know the name of the man he’s trying to poach?
The badass enforcer from a one-percent-motorcycle club.
Do you really think Cobalt and his brothers will let you get your filthy hands on Incubus?
It isn’t going to happen, Gino, so maybe you might want to go to plan B or C, even. ”
I don’t see the hand but feel the open palm crack across my face as my head snaps back.
He leans down so far to me, his upper body is inches from mine.
His eyes have turned black with anger and rage.
Finally, I can see why people have such fear of him, because this is a side I’ve never seen of Gino.
“Big talk from a puttana who can’t even protect herself, let alone an enforcer from, as you say, a biker gang.
If he is any kind of man, he’d give his own life to protect you, his woman, or whatever that club calls their women.
Don’t make me hurt you again, Stella, because even though I won’t like it if you make it necessary to control your outbursts, then so be it.
Now, this is one of the few times I will ask you this question, as there will come a day when I won’t ask you anything because you’ll be mine to do whatever I want. Do you need me to stay tonight?”
Before he finishes that disgusting thought, I’m shaking my head frantically.
When I finally am able to form a word I say NO on a repeat.
For some odd reason that brings a small all-knowing smirk to his face.
When he looks down, studying me, Gino must see the look that crosses my face because that smirk grows into an even wider smile.
“Tesoro, your look is priceless. I like my women feisty because it makes the fight more enjoyable and, in the end, when the prize finally realizes they are mine, the fucking is that much more fulfilling. So with that I will say goodnight. Maybe I’ll see you later, Stella.”
He leans down, places his lips on my forehead for a second or two, then stands, turning toward the door.
Once there he looks back at me with a sudden hunger in his eyes as he takes in my form on the bed, under the covers.
I literally shiver, which has his eyes glittering with such darkness it frightens me.
Oh no, no, that will never happen. I’ll kill him or myself first. I drink some of the bottled water and it’s not long before I feel slightly dizzy and sleepy.
These motherfuckers are drugging me not only by injection but in my water too.
That is my last thought before I drift to restless sleep.
Not sure how long I sleep, but when I start to stir, I could swear I feel a body pressing into mine with an arm around my waist, spooning me from behind. The name “Cullen” comes as a whisper from my lips.
Trying to sit up, I look over my shoulder to see the pillow has an indentation of a head.
Reaching over, it still feels warm and as my eyes drift down that side of the bed, I can see someone was lying on top of the spread or comforter.
This thought has me literally leaping out of the bed, and that’s when I notice that my robe is wide open.
Could it have untied while I was sleeping?
Maybe, but I seriously doubt the tie would be shoved under the covers, close to the foot of the bed.
Suddenly feeling dirty and even kind of violated, I run into the bathroom, stripping the robe off, and getting in the shower.
I stand under the constant stream of water as hot as I can take it.
Both my hands and a washcloth scrub my skin until it is ruby red and hurts.
Trying not to cry, I quit fighting it and let the tears run down my cheeks, so I can violently wipe them away.
Talking to myself, I’m reminded I have to fight with everything I am because of Isabella.
My little girl needs her mamma. Not going to let this mob prick leave my girl without one or both parents.
I pray to God, thankful Cullen and his club got Isabella from my family and have her at their secure clubhouse.
She’s probably at the safest place she could be.
I thought of involving a government agency like FBI or CIA but, unfortunately, Gino has some of those people on his payroll and in his pocket.
I cannot take a chance with my daughter, so I wrap myself up in a towel, refusing to put that robe back on.
Searching the dresser drawers I find an IU sweatshirt, along with some leggings.
Grabbing a pair of fluffy socks from the second drawer, I get dressed.
Feeling thirsty, I look at the bottle of water on the nightstand but walk to the bathroom and drink out of the sink.
Walking back to the bedside, I pick the bottle up.
Opening it, I tip it to my mouth just as I’m entering the bathroom, where I immediately spit it out in the sink.
Grabbing the mouthwash, I rinse out my mouth before pouring all of the water down the drain then refill it.
Glancing at myself, I smirk because if Gino thinks he can win, he’s in for a huge surprise.
I have people in my life that are very important and worth fighting for.
Something I can’t afford to lose. Making my way back to bed, I put the water bottle down, absentmindedly scratching my arms as I’ve been doing after I drank the bottled water.
I try to remember how long it took before I would get dizzy then pass out.
I mimic it from memory, hoping whoever is watching thinks I actually drank the bottled water and am in a drugged-induced state.
I know, eventually, I’ll need to sleep, but for now, need to plan my next steps because the clock is moving and my time is quickly ticking away.
I wonder if Cullen is working on rescuing me without losing his mind.
I wish with my whole heart I could talk to him and try to explain what’s best for him, Isabella, and the whole Kings of Anarchy MC-Indiana Chapter is to forget about me.
Gino is on a mission and doesn’t care who gets in his way.
He’ll mow down anyone to get to that imaginary finish line in his demented head.
I have to protect my family, no matter the cost.