Chapter 14
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Soren
Dinner at the Blackwoods’ house should have been simple. Food and conversation with smiles and laughs. Instead, I couldn’t stop watching him.
Theo sat at the long table across the room, surrounded by the humans. Razor was at his side, while Kieran and Rio sat on the other side. He looked relaxed, his shoulders loose, a faint smirk tugging at his mouth as Razor said something that had the others laughing.
If Patrick had succeeded, I would have missed out on more experiences like this that we could have had together.
“He’s fine, you know.” Riker’s amused voice cut through my thoughts.
I dragged my gaze from Theo and looked at the fox shifter leaning back against the counter like he didn’t have a care in the world.
“I didn’t say he wasn’t,” I replied.
“You didn’t have to,” Riker shot back. “You’ve been staring holes into him since we got over here.”
The shifters and I had been standing in the kitchen ever since Deacon had pulled me over to ask how Dashiel was, since he hadn’t heard from the elf. I hadn’t, either, so I couldn’t give him any news. But no doubt Dash was trying his best to win his fated mate over.
“I’d be doing the same,” Deacon said. “After what happened.”
That pulled the edge back into the moment.
Fucking Patrick.
My jaw tightened.
Across the room, Theo laughed again, unaware of the shift in our conversation or maybe aware and choosing not to show it.
Either way, he was stronger than most would be after what he had endured.
“I need your opinions,” I said finally, my voice low enough that it wouldn’t carry.
That got their attention.
Nox’s gaze sharpened. Deacon stilled. Even Riker straightened slightly, though the smirk didn’t fully leave his face.
“That serious, huh?” Riker muttered.
I didn’t respond to that. Instead, I looked at Theo for half a second before forcing my attention back to them. “He asked me to turn him.”
Heavy silence dropped around us.
Over at the table, Razor’s gaze flicked toward us briefly before returning to Theo. I wasn’t sure if Theo had confided in his president and Razor was distracting Theo enough for me to get things off my chest.
I just wanted to hear their opinions, like I’d said.
There remained a tiny part of me that was holding back, fearing that Theo wanted to become a vampire for the wrong reason.
“What exactly did he say?” Deacon asked, his tone measured.
“That he wants to be stronger,” I replied. “That he wants to stand beside me. Protect me if it comes to it.”
Nox exhaled slowly, dragging a hand down his face. “That tracks.”
“It shouldn’t,” I snapped, receiving a brief look of shock from all of them. I quickly went on. “He’s reacting to what happened. To Patrick. To nearly dying.”
“He didn’t nearly die,” Riker cut in.
My gaze snapped to him.
Riker didn’t flinch. “He survived,” he said, sharper now. “There’s a difference.”
“That doesn’t change the fact that…” That what?
“That you’re scared,” Riker supplied.
The words hit.
And I couldn’t help but think how accurate—though annoying—they were, so I didn’t bother denying it.
“Turning him isn’t something I take lightly,” I said instead. “It’s permanent. It changes everything. What he is. What he’ll become. What he’ll lose.”
“And what he’ll gain,” Deacon added quietly.
I looked at him.
Deacon’s attention had shifted fully to his fated as he added, “It’s not just strength. It’s longevity. Connection. Power. Belonging in a world that would otherwise chew him up.”
“This shouldn’t even be a choice for him,” I said.
But it was… because of me.
“Doesn’t matter because now it is,” Deacon said. “And it really does come down to what he wants.”
That settled heavier than I liked.
Nox leaned forward slightly, forearms braced on the counter. “You think he’s making this decision out of fear.”
“Yes.”
“And if he isn’t?” Nox asked.
I didn’t answer.
Because I didn’t know.
That was the problem.
Riker let out a short, incredulous laugh, dragging a hand through his hair. “That’s a load of bullshit.”
The bluntness snapped the tension.
Deacon shot him a look. “Helpful.”
“I’m serious, and I’m not usually a serious person or fox,” Riker said before he poked me in the chest. “You really think Spade’s the kind of guy to make a life-altering decision like that just because he got scared once?”
My jaw tightened. “You don’t know him like I do.”
Riker snorted. “No, I know him differently, which means I see shit you don’t.”
That earned him a glare.
He didn’t care. “Spade’s not weak,” Riker continued. “He’s not reckless either. If he says he wants something, really wants it, then he’s already thought it through in ten different ways.”
“That doesn’t mean—”
“It means,” Riker cut in, his voice sharpening, “that this isn’t about Patrick.”
Silence settled again.
“He doesn’t scare easy,” Riker went on. “And when he does get scared, he doesn’t run from it. He adapts. He decides how he’s going to handle it next time. All the biker guys are the same. They’re a different breed to just any human like Rio and Kieran.”
“Watch yourself,” Nox warned his brother.
Riker grinned, but he wiped it away when he said to me, “Spade just wants to be able to stand with pride at your side and protect you in the same way you would him. It sucks to say, but he needs the extra boost from your vampy juices because your position in this territory is a lot more public. You get a lot more attention than we do. A lot more risks.”
My chest tightened at the truth.
“He chose you instantly, with no sign of fear. Don’t let your fear ruin his choice,” Riker said as he pulled himself up to sit on the counter.
I exhaled slowly, dragging a hand down my face.
Across the room, Theo glanced over, and our eyes met instantly.
The bond between us stirred—soft and aware.
He didn’t know what we were talking about, but he felt me, so concern flickered across his expression. I forced the worry down, steadying myself, letting something calmer push through the connection.
I’m fine. I thought, even though he wouldn’t hear it.
Still, his shoulders eased slightly before Kieran said something that pulled his attention away again.
“You’re overthinking it,” Riker added, quieter now but no less certain.
“I’m thinking exactly as much as I should be,” I replied drily.
“Nope,” Riker said. “You’re thinking like someone who’s already decided it’s a no and is looking for reasons to justify it. Which is just boring and selfish, my friend.”
Deacon shifted slightly. “You don’t have to decide tonight.”
“I know.”
Nox added. “Talk to him. Really talk to him. About the process, the pros and cons. Lay everything on the table.”
I glanced back at Theo again.
He was smiling and relaxed.
Alive.
Because I hadn’t lost him.
Because he was still here to make choices like this.
My chest tightened. “What if he regrets it?” I asked quietly, which was a major part of my reluctance.
None of them answered immediately. Maybe because there wasn’t a clear answer.
Finally, it was Riker who spoke again. “Then he deals with it,” he said simply. “Same as the rest of us deal with every choice we make in this world. Holy shit, I just sounded so fucking wise. Mark it down on the calendar.”
Nox snorted.
“He won’t blame you,” Deacon added. “Not if you’re honest with him about every detail.”
I looked down at the counter, jaw tight, then back at Theo.
He laughed again, nudging Razor with his shoulder.
So human.
For now.
“He wants to stand beside me,” I murmured, more to myself.
“You’ll sort this out,” Nox said.
I just had to tell him everything. But even with all the information, I had a feeling that Theo would still choose to be turned.
He loved me as much as I loved him, and I would do the same if I were in his position.
So, could I really doubt his choice?
“Anyway,” Riker sang, “I’m bored.” He slipped off the counter. “Daddy, I want to go home,” he called to Razor as he ran over to the man and straddled his lap. Razor dug his fingers into Riker’s ass cheeks.
Across the room, Theo glanced over at me again, and I winked. He tipped his chin up and returned the gesture.
Maybe a few extra days for Theo to think about this a little longer before I laid everything on the table wouldn’t hurt.