Chapter 20 #3
He gave her a small grin that she felt down to her toes. “You moving in with Smiley?” he asked out of the blue.
Bree shyly looked behind her at the man in question, then back to Tex as she nodded.
“Figured. I’ve arranged to have your things in the Vegas storage facility shipped here to Riverton. You might want to think about where everything is gonna go.”
Bree blinked in surprise.
“Thanks, man,” Smiley said, reaching around her to shake Tex’s hand.
Then the older man nodded at her, gave Smiley a chin lift, and strode across the room toward Fiona. If she hadn’t known it before, it was obvious that woman was a favorite of his. They had a lot of intimate history, and the love they had for each other was a beautiful thing.
“You good?” Smiley asked, as he wrapped his arms around her from behind and rested his chin on her shoulder.
“Did you arrange that?” she asked.
“Nope. He texted me and asked what the plan was for your stuff. I told him we’d deal with it later. Guess he decided not to let us worry about it. Again, you good?”
“Yeah. I’m more than good, Smiley,” Bree said.
She looked over the crowd. Her friends. She’d almost lost this.
That thought upset her more than everything that had actually happened to her.
Yes, it had been horrible. She’d been locked up, treated as less than human, threatened, beaten, and scared out of her mind.
And yet…she was here. Alive. With more friends than she’d ever had in her life.
She could act like a victim. Let what happened overwhelm her and turn her into a different person. Someone who was scared of her own shadow. Who stayed inside so she didn’t have to interact with strangers who may or may not hurt her.
The truth was, life was full of ups and downs. And she preferred to concentrate on the ups rather than the downs. Turning in Smiley’s arms, she grinned at him.
“What?” he asked with furrowed brows. “What’s that smile for?”
“I’m happy,” she informed him.
He didn’t look appeased. If anything, he looked even more concerned. “It’s only been two days. Everything that happened could hit you hard when you least expect it.”
Bree shrugged. “You’re right. But you’ll be there.
And I can talk to Julie and Fiona about it.
Or Remi or Kelli. Or go spend some time with Yana, to remind myself of how appreciative she is for all she has and how well she’s dealing with what happened to her too.
I was lucky, I know that. But I’ll take lucky over dead any day of the week.
I want to live, Smiley. Look forward, not back. ”
“I love you,” he told her.
“And I love you too. One day, we’ll stand in this place when we’re old and gray. All our friends’ kids will be here, cutting up and saying stuff we don’t understand and talking about technology that’s over our heads. And we’ll look back over our life with no regrets.”
A look of such longing flashed on Smiley’s face, Bree’s heart ached.
“I want that,” he said.
“So we’ll do what we have to in order to make it happen.”
“Yeah.”
A waiter walked over and held out a tray full of champagne glasses filled to the rim. Bree took two and handed one to Smiley.
“To us,” she said quietly.
“To us,” he repeated. Instead of taking a sip, Smiley put the glass on a nearby table without looking and pulled her closer.
He kissed her long, hard, and with all the love she knew he felt in his heart.
Bree felt it down to her toes. She was the luckiest woman in the world, and she vowed to live life to its fullest from that day forward.
Hours later, Smiley couldn’t sleep. He held Bree until she’d drifted off, but his brain wouldn’t shut down.
After everything that happened, he couldn’t stop thinking about something Castillo had said.
The man was dead, and what he’d said was most likely bullshit, but he couldn’t rest until he’d gotten it off his chest.
Turning, he gently kissed Bree on the forehead, amazed that she was here with him. Not only because of what she’d been through, but because he was a grumpy asshole. He knew it, but somehow Bree didn’t seem to care. It was baffling, but he wasn’t about to let her go now. He needed her too much.
Staying as silent as possible, he slipped out from under the covers, standing by the bed for a moment to make sure Bree hadn’t woken up.
She shifted a little after losing his body heat, but settled again.
Just looking at her shorter hair, her eyelashes against her bruised skin, made him wish he could go back and kill Castillo all over again.
Smiley forced himself to walk out of the bedroom and into the living room. He sat on the couch and stared down at his phone. Taking a deep breath, he dialed a number he’d asked Tex for before he’d left Aces.
It was the middle of the night, but the man on the other end answered after only one ring.
“Rex.”
“I’m sorry for calling so late. It’s Smiley.” The urge to talk to this man had been overwhelming, but now that he had him on the line, Smiley wasn’t sure he’d made the right decision.
“What’s up? Is Bree all right?”
“She’s good. Amazing, really. She constantly surprises me with her resilience.”
“Our women are stronger than we think,” Rex agreed. “Every day, I wonder how Raven survived what she did with her personality intact. I still have no idea how she did it.”
“I need to tell you something,” Smiley blurted. “If it was me, I’d want to know, but…it’s not good news.”
“It’s about Castillo, isn’t it?”
“Yeah. I know you’re aware that he worked with del Rio. But he said something. Bragged about it, actually.”
“He’s dead, right?”
“Yeah.”
“Thank you for that,” Rex said. “You saved me from calling in a marker to take care of that myself.”
Smiley nodded, even though the other man couldn’t see him. “You can forget I called if you’d prefer.”
“I’d prefer you said what you need to say, what’s keeping you up in the middle of the night and taking you away from Bree’s side,” Rex said matter-of-factly.
“Right. So, I was stalling. Back in Guayaquil. Trying to kill time so my team could arrive and lend a hand. I taunted Castillo. Brought up your name. Goaded him with the fact you were going to hunt him down, and his impending death would be at your hands,” Smiley admitted.
“It probably wasn’t my finest moment, but I was doing anything I could to give Kevlar and my team time to get there. ”
He was stalling again now, dragging out this conversation more than necessary. He got to the point.
“Castillo claimed he was your son’s biological father. Said he’d been with your wife enough to be certain David was his.”
To his immense surprise, Rex laughed.
“My son is just that—mine. And Raven’s. He isn’t, and never was, that asshole’s.”
Smiley wasn’t sure what to say.
“Look. I’ve made peace with what happened to Raven.
Does it make me want to kill every motherfucker who dared lay a hand on her?
Of course. But I can’t. I choose instead to concentrate on the life we have now.
On the amazing, brilliant, compassionate, and kind son we’re raising.
And David is mine. One hundred percent. I might not have any DNA in common with him, but that doesn’t make him any less my son. ”
“Right.”
“I respect you, Smiley. It couldn’t have been an easy thing to tell me. But it means the world that you cared enough to pass on what that asshole claimed. You know it wasn’t smart to antagonize him, right?”
“Yeah. Right after he made that claim, he ordered his men to shoot me. I would’ve been better off talking about the fucking weather or something.”
Rex chuckled. “I’ve learned that it’s always better to put a bullet in someone’s head rather than hang around and have a fucking conversation. It’s just easier.”
“I’ll remember that for next time,” Smiley told him.
“See that you do.”
“What you did, what you do…it’s important,” he told Rex, with as much sincerity in his tone as he could muster.
“I think so too. Every woman and child we save is a victory. And I’ll never lose sleep over killing a man who thinks he owns women and can do with them what he pleases.”
“Amen to that,” he agreed.
“Thanks again for the call. Fuck him. Fuck them all. I’m gonna live my life, be happy, laugh, and enjoy the shit out of every day…that’s enough for me.”
He was right. Rex had been to hell and back, as had his family. If he could be happy, Smiley could too. “If you and your family ever get to Southern California, Bree and I would love to get together.”
“I’ll make sure that happens. Go back to bed, Smiley. Sleep with a clear conscience. That’s an order.”
Smiley snorted. “You aren’t my commander.”
Rex simply chuckled. Then the line went silent.
Feeling better now that he’d gotten that off his chest, Smiley stood, turned—and paused when he saw Bree leaning against the wall near the hallway.
“I didn’t mean to wake you up,” he told her.
“You didn’t. Well, not really. I missed the feel of you next to me.” She padded over to the couch and pulled him back down to sit with her, snuggling into his side, her knees pulled up with her feet on the cushion next to her. “It sounded like he took that okay.”
Smiley wasn’t surprised she figured out who he was talking to. She’d been there. She heard what Castillo had claimed.
“Yeah.”
“For the record, I think he was lying,” Bree said.
Smiley wasn’t so sure, but he didn’t contradict her.
“That had to have been really hard. Telling him, I mean.”
“It wasn’t easy.”
“That’s one of the many things I love about you, Jude Stark,” Bree said, looking up at him. “You do what’s right no matter how hard it is on you.”
Her compliment soothed his soul in a way no one else had ever been able to. “Thanks.”
“You’re welcome. Now…it’s the middle of the night. And even though it’s too soon for me to jump your bones, can we go back to bed anyway?”
In response, Smiley stood and leaned over to pick her up.
She giggled but didn’t protest. “I think I like you carrying me around.”
“Good, because I like carrying you around,” Smiley told her.
He got them both settled under the covers once more, and the contentment he felt when Bree put her head on his shoulder and threw a leg over his thighs was almost scary.
“I love you, Smiley. I always knew Jude Stark was a superhero name, and you prove it to me time and time again. And I’m not just talking about you sliding down a gutter nine stories with me on your back, or acting as if having two guns pointed at your head is no big deal, or any of the larger-than-life things you do on your missions.
I’m talking about you calling a friend because a rumor you heard that involves him was bothering you.
Or carrying me around because it makes you happy.
Or making me dinner. Or arranging for all my friends to come to a bar to welcome me home.
Or any of the other hundreds of things you do every day to make my life easier and happier.
You’re my superhero, Smiley. And I love you so much. ”
“I’m just a man who wants to do everything in his power to make his woman’s life easier,” he protested.
“Well, you do. And I appreciate it. And you.”
“Love you,” Smiley said, turning and kissing the top of her head.
She kissed his chest. “Love you back. When I’m healed, you better watch out…I’m gonna show you exactly how much I love and appreciate you.”
“Looking forward to it,” Smiley said with a sappy grin.
“Can I ask you something?”
“You can ask me anything you want, whenever you want,” he told her.
He saw her gaze was fixed on something across the room. Following her line of sight, he realized she was staring at a bookshelf against the wall.
“I want to fix up your bear,” she blurted.
Smiley couldn’t help but chuckle.
“That wasn’t meant to be funny,” she protested.
“How long have you been thinking about that? Here we are, in bed, sleepy and talking about superpowers, and you’re worried about Beary.”
“I love that name,” Bree told him with a huge smile.
It was ridiculous. Something only a kid could come up with. Smiley had such complicated feelings about his childhood stuffed animal. There were some good memories associated with the toy, but also some not-so-good ones. It was the only thing he took when he left his house for good.
“I just think that he deserves a face-lift,” Bree went on. “You both went through some tough times, but those are over now. You’re both free of all that.”
She could be talking about herself…or him. And she was right. It would be cathartic to restore Beary. To see him shine again. “Okay,” Smiley said.
“Really?” Bree asked with excitement.
“Really,” Smiley said.
“Yay!”
His girlfriend was a goof…and he wouldn’t change one damn thing about her. “Can we sleep now?” he asked, pretending to be grumpy.
She sighed with contentment and snuggled into him. “Yeah.”
It was amazing how fast Bree fell asleep.
He would’ve accused her of faking it, except he knew firsthand how she could be awake one second and snoring the next.
He wouldn’t have it any other way though.
It meant she wasn’t kept awake thinking about the awful things that had happened to her in the recent past.
Knowing that she could let down her guard, and that she trusted him when she was at her most vulnerable, when she was sleeping, made Smiley grin up at the ceiling.
He fell asleep with that smile on his face and woke up the same way. Because he held in his arms the one person who made him put aside the guilt he’d carried all his life about his parents. Who loved him for who he was, warts and all.
This was what life was about…not how much money you could amass, how big your car or house, or even how many friends you had—although friends were super important.
It was about finding someone who could overlook your faults and love you anyway.
Bree was that person for him…and he’d remind her every single day how important she was to him, and how much she was loved.