36. Chapter 36 #2
“I shoot on film, and at the end of every day, I mail it home. It’s a habit I started a long time ago.
” Her grip on the grocery bag tightens. “I knew if I gave up the film, they’d kill me too.
I’d lose the only leverage I had. Those photos were the only thing keeping me alive.
So, I had to…” She swallows hard, clears her throat, and continues.
“I had to endure whatever they did to me.
“They beat me, choked me, waterboarded me with rum. They turned a firehose on me. They hung me from the ceiling even knowing I had a broken arm. Somehow, through it all, I held out.”
Hearing the way they tortured her pisses me off, giving me a strong urge to hit something. But I rein in my anger. That’s not what she needs from me right now.
“There was a man in an expensive suit. He was in charge.” Her words tumble out in a rush now. “He was there virtually, always watching from a laptop. He…he seemed impressed I was holding out. Eventually, he made me an offer.”
She takes a deep, shaky breath and blows it out. “If I gave him the film, he’d make me his property and protect me. If I didn’t, he’d sell me to the highest bidder.”
“Jesus.”
“I knew I couldn’t live like that, but I couldn’t see a way out. There was no way for me to escape. The day you found me, I was going to try and provoke them into killing me.”
I gather her into my arms and hold tight.
She survived. The trepidation rolling through me is irrational, but now that I understand how close I came to losing her, fear shoots through my veins.
I want to destroy every one of them for making her feel so powerless, so broken, that death seemed like her only option.
“Is that why you lied to the FBI?”
Her head snaps up and whips my direction while she tries to squirm away.
I hold tight. “Easy, Remi. I saw the recording of your debrief.”
She relaxes, leaning back in her seat. “I know the Consortium has people everywhere. Sometimes, while they waited for me to recover enough to torture me again, they’d talk business. I listened and picked up some things.”
She shifts in her seat, turning toward me.
“While I was being held, I figured out the Consortium had been watching Danny and me before we left the States. I knew they saw you and me leave McQueen’s.
They witnessed the kiss we shared outside the hotel the morning I left. They wanted to know about you.”
“Do you know why they were following you?”
She shakes her head. “No. But I’ve given it a lot of thought. I think the Consortium somehow found out Danny was going to investigate the story before he left New York. It’s the only thing that makes sense.
“Maybe I’m just paranoid, but something about those agents didn’t feel right.
How did they know Danny and I were being watched?
How did they know you and I met at McQueen’s?
They didn’t seem to care about Danny, but they wanted to know all about you.
Their questions about you felt…I don’t know…
too intense. Too invasive. Why would they care about you?
How is our night together relevant to any of this? ”
“That seemed odd to me as well.”
She glances up at me. “I started to wonder if the Consortium thought I sent the film to you, and that’s why they wanted to find you.”
She takes a breath. “I decided before the interview that I wouldn’t tell them the whole truth. I’d stick to the story I gave the man in the suit. But when they started asking about you…” She lifts her tortured gaze to mine. “Why would the FBI ask me about you? It felt wrong, so I lied.”
She lied to protect me.
I pull her close and hold her tight. “I think you might be right, Remi. I’m not convinced those men are FBI either. Or, if they are, that they’re not also on the Consortium’s payroll.”
She lifts her head, her eyes searching mine. “You believe me?”
“Hell, yes, I believe you.”
“Thank you.” She releases a deep sigh of relief and drops her head against my chest. “Thank you, Colton.”
For several minutes, we sit in silence, both lost in thought.
My mind spins when I think about how she had what they wanted, or at least knew where it was, and she still held out.
She was beaten. Her bones were broken. Waterboarded.
Choked. Locked up and blindfolded until death felt like her only escape.
Eventually, Remi breaks the silence. “I’m paranoid all the time.” Then her breath hitches, her tormented voice cracking. “They broke me, Colton,” she says with a single, strangled sob. “They broke me.”
I cradle her face between my hands, waiting until her eyes meet mine. “No, Remi.” I shake my head. “No. They only bent you. You were strong enough to survive. You’re strong enough to recover from this.”
She stares at me, her brown eyes full of anguish and pain. “I can’t sleep because I’m having nightmares. I’m scared all the time. I feel like I’m losing my mind. Like I can’t trust anyone.”
“You can trust me and my team. I promise.” I wrap her in my arms and pull her close. “You’re not alone anymore.”
She glances down at the bag in her lap. “Today, the film I’ve been waiting for arrived.”
Once again, we’re both quiet.
This time, I’m the one who breaks the silence. “What did you catch on film, Remi?”
She leans into me, fingers clutching tighter around her bag. “It’s better if you see it,” she says softly.