Chapter 31
31
RAE
C hilled air crested over my bare arms, causing goose bumps to sprout as I slipped into Alec’s recovery room. My steps faltered at the sight of him connected to various tubes and machines. Charlie gave my hip a gentle squeeze, a silent question if I was okay. I nodded and continued forward, moving toward the bed.
It was unnerving seeing Alec so vulnerable, lying completely still. Tears welled in my lower lids as I shuffled along the bedside, Charlie at my side, making sure I didn’t fall and wheeling my IV tree. The doctor and nurses weren’t thrilled at my decision to seek Alec out, but there was nothing they could do to stop me.
I had to see him no matter who tried to stand in my way. Charlie saw that determination and agreed to help me find Alec as long as I took it easy.
“Here,” Charlie ordered as he dragged the lone chair in the room to Alec’s bedside. “They said he might be out of it for a while. He lost a lot of blood, plus the time he was under anesthesia. He’s also on heavy antibiotics to offset the bacteria from the liver nick.”
Worry creased his forehead as he watched me sink carefully into the chair without the use of either arm. I couldn’t even go to the bathroom on my own, which was mortifying considering I peed every thirty minutes with the fluids they pumped into my body through the IV.
A pinch and sting burned down the back of my arm as I reached toward Alec’s massive hand lying on top of the white blanket. A sense of calm washed through me, chasing away the recent horrifying memories from the moment my fingers wrapped around one of his.
I gave that single digit a soft squeeze.
“He’ll be okay, right?” I asked Charlie while searching every inch of Alec’s pale, slack face. Even sedated, the man appeared menacing somehow, as if his fighting spirit raged behind the soft, relaxed features to free itself of the immobile body.
“The nurse said he should make a full recovery. That bastard is one lucky fucker that the knife only nicked his liver instead of impaling it in the center.”
I grimaced at the thought. “Should? What do you mean he should make a full recovery?”
“You know him. Alec will probably do something stupid before he’s fully recovered that will delay his healing.” I huffed in agreement. One after another, I swept a single finger along the ridges of his cut knuckles. “You’ll be there to help him though, right? Make sure he takes his meds, doesn’t overdo it, and coddle his whiny ass?”
I smiled at that, only for it to slip as I stared at Alec.
“I don’t know what he wants. All this has happened so fast. I know what I want, or rather who I want, but… it’s complicated. We’re complicated. He has to make a choice between me and what he’s believed for a very long time. I want him to choose me, but… I mean, you know.”
“I don’t follow.” Charlie stepped alongside me and placed a hand on the back of the chair. “Why is it complicated? I’ve seen you two. It’s what everyone searches for in a relationship. It’s real, Rae, the realest thing I’ve ever seen.”
“Look at him, Charlie, and look at me.” My hand slipped from the bed. “He can have anyone he wants. We had fun this past week, outside of the dead body and being captured, but what happens when we go back to real life? When he goes back to being this badass Ranger and me a lonely librarian with a slight drinking problem? I had a twin brother who I never knew about and tried to kill me. Talk about family drama. No one wants that mixed in their family. He’s everything, and I’m a no one.” I hung my head, strands of greasy hair slipping over my shoulder and curtaining around my face. “I want him to choose me so much it hurts. As in my heart hurts at the thought of not being with him. But who am I to ask him to stay?”
Silence settled over the room, my confession hovering in the air between us.
“I’m disappointed in you, Rae.” I snapped my face up to Charlie’s. “I thought you were smarter than this. That you could see you mean everything to him. Complications are a fact of life. It’s how you overcome them that shows the strength in the relationship. With what you masterminded for those women.” My eyes widened. Forgot about that part. “Did you really think we wouldn’t piece the details together? Your Hulk is the one who discovered the library connection.”
“Charlie,” I groaned and attempted to stand. A heavy hand pressed to the top of my head, keeping me in the chair. “You can’t look into me, into them. They’re safe, and if?—”
“I’m not, Rae. But trust your heart and believe in Bronson. If you can do that, then nothing else matters.”
“Am I interrupting something?” Both Charlie and I snapped our attention to the frowning Alec, whose narrowed eyes were on the hand still resting atop my head.
“Alec,” I whimpered with the swell of emotions. “You’re awake.” Tears freely slid down both cheeks. Forgetting about everything but him, I reached to touch his face. The stitches tugged, stopping my hand halfway. With a grimace, I pulled my hand back and covered his with my own. “How do you feel?”
He gave me a blank stare. “Like I was stabbed.”
A delusional chuckle tickled in my chest. “I know the feeling.”
“What were you two talking about?” Alec asked as he shifted along the bed. “Fuck, this is worse than being shot.”
“You’ve been shot before?” I gasped.
“Three times, Sunshine. Now stop avoiding the question.”
I chewed on my lower lip, not excited about the idea of talking about either topic Charlie brought up.
“Little Rae here was about to tell me how she masterminded the escape and vanishing act of fifteen women and seven children. Weren’t you?”
I cut a glare his way. “Was I now?”
“Yep,” he popped the p for emphasis. The bastard smiled. “And as for me touching your girl, don’t get all pissy or the heart monitor will go ballistic. She tried to stand up, but she’s in no condition, so I kept her seated with a hand on her pretty little head.”
Alec’s gray eyes turned stormy at the last comment. As predicted, the beeping increased in speed and volume. If he didn’t calm down, the doctors would come in and force me out.
Not yet. I needed more time.
“The library,” I said, and both pairs of eyes turned to me. “The first woman, Megan, I met at the library. She came in to borrow a book for her and her daughter. I noticed the bruises the first time only on her. Months passed, she kept coming back, and I eventually noticed bruises on the little girl. Red marks on her wrists, and once in a cast. It took another couple months for me to gain the courage to say something. I asked if she had anywhere to go, any family who could take her in. And you know her response? I’ll never forget it. She said, ‘Nowhere he won’t find me and take me back.’ And I knew, I knew right then that I could do something, be someone for her and her daughter. Even with my crappy job, self-isolation, and little money, I had the power to change her life.”
A single finger stroked over my knuckles, drawing my attention to our hands.
“I read enough suspense and thrillers over the years that the plan was fairly easy. The fact that no one noticed me anymore made it even better. I started with researching the best drug to knock someone out. That’s when I discovered roofies.”
“How in the hell did you score roofies?” Alec asked, his voice gruff as if the words hurt.
“The parolees and recently released visitors at the library,” I whispered. “They wanted money, which I had, and had access to the drugs. So I made a plan. Bought her a disposable phone, made her a new ID—which was oddly easy thanks to some YouTube videos—and gave her enough cash to get out of the state and find a shelter. Some wore disguises and hopped a bus, and others had a friend drive them to a different town to catch a train. It varied depending on what resources they brought to the table.
“The night they left, they drugged their husbands or boyfriends, whichever, waited for them to pass out, and then left. And it worked. Time and time again. And it became my thing, my way of making a difference with no one ever knowing except the people who mattered. It wasn’t much, but to them it was everything.”
A mix of awe and disbelief settled over Alec’s smiling face. “Your bracelet has something to do with all this, doesn’t it?”
“Did you find it?” I gripped his hand as hard as I could. “It broke off my wrist when he took me.” At his confirming nod, I released a heavy breath. “Great, good. Thank you. And yeah, it has everything to do with all this. After they leave town, I instruct them to never contact me or anyone they knew again. It’s too dangerous. But I want to know when they’re safe. So when they’re settled in their new life, safe and living, I ask that they let me know they’re okay.”
“By sending you a charm.” I nodded. “Rae.” Alec sighed. “What you did was?—”
“Illegal,” I said, defeated. Releasing his hand, I sat back in the chair, putting distance between us. “I’m not asking you to choose?—”
“I was going to say brave, stupid, amazing.”
“But… but you have to turn me in. Those drugs alone?—”
“Drugs?” Charlie chimed in as he stepped along Alec’s bedside. “I don’t recall any drugs.” He narrowed his brows in concentration and looked at Alec. “Do you?”
A small smirk popped that adorable dimple. “Nope.”
I gaped at the two. “Alec, that’s not why you became a Ranger. I’m not above the law?—”
His hand snapped out and grabbed my own. “You’re right, you’re not. But, Rae?” He glanced over my shoulder. “Give us a minute, would you?”
Charlie exited without a word, the door closing behind him with a soft click, leaving Alec and me alone.
“You’re not mad?” I whispered in disbelief. The urge to crawl into the bed with him, to snuggle against that expansive chest and have those powerful arms wrapped around me, became too much to resist. I craved his comfort and protection.
“I’m… no, I’m not mad. I’m in awe of you, Sunshine, and obsessively in love with the strong, confident badass woman you are.”
“Alec….” Overwhelming emotions clogged my throat, preventing me from saying more.
“I’m disappointed you didn’t tell me the truth,” he continued. “And I’m pissed that I’m the reason you didn’t. I know you ran to prevent me from choosing between you and the law, and, Rae, I’m sorry I made you think… for it to even be a thought that I wouldn’t choose you. All day, every day, I’ll choose you.” He groaned and pressed his head into the pillow in frustration. “I hate fucking doing this while lying here like a damn invalid. But it needs to be said now, before I lose you again. I’m sorry, Rae. I should’ve believed you when you said it had nothing to do with the case. I should’ve given you a safe space to tell me the truth, to give you time to open up. But I didn’t, and instead I forced you away, which put your life in danger.”
Those dark lashes fanned over his cheeks with long blinks. Desperation swirled in his gray eyes as he looked over to where I sat beside his hospital bed.
“I don’t deserve your forgiveness. For leaving all those years ago and for yesterday. But if you do, if you give me another chance, I’ll spend the rest of my life worshipping you the way you deserve. You’re beautiful inside and out, Rae Chapin, and I don’t want you to leave. I love you, Sunshine. I want you home, with me, where you’ve always belonged.”
I bit my quivering lip and smiled. “I’ll forgive you if you can figure out a way for me to be up there with you.” I nodded toward the bed and gave a pointed look at my injured arms.
Deep wrinkles formed along his normally smooth forehead.
“Charlie,” he yelled so loud my ears rang. Within seconds, the door swung open and his face appeared through the gap. “Help Rae onto the bed, would you?”
Charlie huffed and strode into the room. “I did not agree to become an accomplice to this terrible decision. You’re both hurt.” Alec answered with a blank stare. “Fine.” Standing beside me, he held his hands over my waist, then hips and paused. “I’ll need to touch her to help her up. Don’t Hulk out on me.”
“Only where necessary,” Alec grumbled.
The side bar lowered with a hard shove and click. Hands on my waist, Charlie helped me onto the mattress before swinging my legs around. Alec scooted to the far side of the bed, careful of his many tubes and cords, giving me enough room to lie on my back. With a few pinched cords, hissed curses, and groans of pain, we settled beside each other.
Contentment flooded my veins, allowing my first full, calm breath since we left his home over a day ago.
Charlie frowned as he looked at us.
“May I go now?” he asked with his hands crossed over his chest.
I giggled at the annoyance written across his features. No, wait. I squinted to see better in the dim light. Was that annoyance or sadness? Whatever emotion it was, it vanished as he turned and left without a second glance back.
A soft sigh slipped past my lips as I relaxed against Alec.
“Did you really mean it?”
“Mean what, Sunshine?”
“That you don’t want me to leave?” I swallowed hard and cleared my throat of the uncertainty that crept up.
“Not only do I not want you to leave, but I don’t want to leave you. Come live with me.” I sucked in a breath. “I know that sounds crazy, and you have a life here in Sweetcreek?—”
“No,” I cut in. “I don’t have a life.” My face scrunched with a cringe. “What I mean is, I don’t want that life anymore. This town only reminds me of what I’ve lost, and now of him. I was lonely, Alec, and honestly, I’ve always waited for you, like I knew one day you’d come back for me. I want to make a new life, with you.”
A new life.
Yes, a new life without pain and grief.
A new beginning with the only man I ever loved.