Natalie
Fifteen
W e get down the stairs just as Julian bursts through the door. Pea is already there, gun aimed at his face, little Nico is nowhere to be found though, neither is Jerry-Lee. Maybe Pea put them both in a safe place? I sure fucking hope so.
Dante pushes me behind him, his arms tense and shaky.
I’m still breathless and in a little shock from our heated kiss, I look down and notice the wet patch on the top from where Dante sucked at my nipple.
Shit . Pea notices, pulls her jacket from the coat hook and hands it to me.
I give her a grateful look, then admire the thought she never lowered her gun.
“Found you.” Julian smiles. “Come on, treasure. Let’s go home.” He holds out his hand, speaking to me like he didn’t kidnap me off the street this morning. “I have a surprise for you.” I wrap the jacket tighter around my shivering body. I’m not sure why my body won’t stop trembling. Fear maybe?
“Like locking me up again, no thanks .” My voice is unsteady despite my faked bravado.
Dante’s hand twitches, I wrap my little finger around his, luckily Julian doesn’t notice.
Yet that one small connection brings me such strength.
My body stops vibrating instantly. Julian used to bring me strength, but now he drains it all from me, makes me feel weak in his presence .
So why do I still have that small bit of tenderness for him deep down?
“I know, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that, treasure.
” He sighs, hand still reaching out for me.
Pea steps a little closer, shoving her pistol into Julian’s cheek, yet his eyes never leave mine.
I reach out from behind Dante and touch her arm, when she looks around to me I shake my head and she backs away, stepping beside me.
Her gun stays firmly planted in her hand.
“Please believe me when I say it won’t happen again. I promise.”
“You’re damn right it won't." Dante stands in front of me, hiding me from Julian’s view. “Now get out of my house.”
Julian's laugh is dark. Menacing. Like a switch has been flipped inside him somewhere. “I have something you can’t give her, mate. ” He sneers. “Natalie. I found Anya .” My breath catches in my throat.
Anya? He knows where my baby girl is.
“I can take you to her if you come with me.”
“ Cazzo di coglione , are you really going to use her daughter to make her go with you?” Dante tenses his fists. “How could you stoop so low ?”
I step to the side. I have a chance to see Anya again. I have to take it, even if it is Julian that takes me to her. “Where is she?” I whisper.
“Nat…” Dante starts to talk only to be cut off by Julian.
“With your Pa.” He tells me. “So let’s go save her, together.” His hand comes out again, waiting for me to take it. I want to take it.
What the fuck is wrong with me?
Pa told me he sent her away, she wasn’t there for the last four years I was there for. Why would he take her back? Is she really there or is Julian lying to me to get me back to that room ?
“Julian.” Pea growls. “You best not be fucking messing with her.”
“Would I do such a thing?” His eyes connect with mine again, pleading with me. “I promise, treasure. She is there, so we can go and get her back. You can have your daughter back. We can raise her together.”
“We?” I step in front of Dante. “There is no we Julian. You threw us away the moment you locked me up.” His smile falters a little and his eye twitches. Guilt rises in the pit of my stomach. “Show me proof she is there.”
“Is my word not enough?” He scoffs.
“No.” I reply honestly, stepping a little closer. “Not after what you’ve done. I believed in you, I believed in you for years. Only for you to throw it all away because I went to breakfast with a friend.”
He raises his eyebrow, “friend? Him? He hates you, treasure.
" Julian's hand lands on my shoulder. “He. Hates. You.” I feel Dante fidget behind me, I put my hand up to stop him from whatever he is about to do. I hope he listens. The last thing I want is these two to fight again. “Or are you that stupid to believe that just because he’s a little nice to you, that automatically makes him your friend?” He smirks.
“Are you really that desperate?” My hand moves on its own as it connects with his cheek.
His smug smile returns. “Slap me again, I dare you.” he winks, something shifts in the air around us.
I glance down and see he is aroused. “Come on, treasure. Slap. Me.”
“You’re a freak.” I spit out.
“And you’re a desperate whore. Just over a week ago we shared a bed. And now you’re shacking up with my best friend.” His eye twitches again. “Nico can’t replace your daughter, Natalie.”
“I know.”
“And Dante won’t replace me.”
“I love him.” I blurt out.
Julian's face falls, his hand comes up to his throat. Shit, this wasn’t the way I wanted to tell him.
“What?” He croaks.
“I am in love with Dante, Julian. And yes I still have a bit of love for you too, even after everything.” Soft fingers stroke along the bottom of my spine. “It’s a fucked up situation, I know that. But I don’t give a shit about that right now. Where is my daughter?”
“He’s the ex?”
“Where is my daughter?”
“Answer me.”
“Where is Anya?” Dante growls. “That is the most important thing right now. We can work out feelings later .” He glides his arm around my back as he steps beside me. I look around for Pea, to see she has also disappeared. “If she is with that stronzo, we need to get her away from him, now.”
“So you are the ex.” Julian holds his hands to his face and groans in frustration. “I should have fucking known when I saw the locket. I knew deep down though, I knew it was you.” His voice quivers. I want to hold him, to explain everything like adults, but there’s something I have to do first.
“Julian,” I reach for his hand, “where is Anya? We can talk after but I need to see my child.”
“I told you already.” Julian sighs, defeated.
“Can you remember where he lives?” Dante questions, I nod, “I’ll take you.” He picks up his keys and calls out to Pea, after saying she will stay with Nico and update Bull , Dante pulls me to the car.
And against my better judgement, I look back, the sight of Julian wiping away his tears makes my own eyes sting.
I’m so sorry, Mr Stalker.
As we get closer to the farm house where I spent the worst years of my life, my lungs almost stop working as I try and try to catch my breath.
“Breathe, gattina. ” Dante tries to sooth me with one hand while keeping the other on the steering wheel. “I can go in alone, you can wait in the car.”
“No.” I shake my head. “She’s my child. I have to be the one to save her.” I wheeze .
I made Julian cry. I never wanted to upset him.
“Okay,” he nods in agreement. “But I’m coming with you, and if anything happens.” He leans over and takes a pistol out of the glovebox. “I’ll shoot the bastard.”
I take the gun from his hand and slide it into Pea’s jacket pocket. “I will keep it until it’s needed. I can’t have you being all shooty for no reason.” I look back out the window.
“Kitten,” I shake my head. I can’t talk about it now. “I understand. I just don’t want you or Anya to get hurt.”
“I know, Dante. I know.” He twists his fingers through mine as we turn the last corner and drive up the gravel driveway. My heart stops in my chest at the sight in front of the house.
A young girl, her hair is matted and her eyes have no emotions in them as she glares at the headlights. I don’t wait for Dante to put on the handbrake before opening the door and jumping out the vehicle.
Rushing to her, she doesn’t flinch.
Stay still.
Be quiet.
Be a good girl.
She must have the same mantra burned into her head as it was mine. The top she wears is massive on her and fails to stay up on her shoulder, the shoulder with the fractured heart birthmark. Anya. My baby girl is alive, broken, but alive.
Stay strong, Natalie. Don’t cry in front of her. Be brave.
“Hey, don’t panic.” I say softly. “We’re here to help you.
” She doesn't react. No show of any emotion, no attempt to move as I inspect the collar around her neck. You would have thought she was a statue if it wasn’t for the blinking and the visible breath in the chilly air, despite it being the middle of summer.
“Do you know where the key is for this?” I tap the padlock attached to the collar and chain keeping her knelt in the sodden mud.
She shakes her head no just once before going back to staring and blinking at the car. Not once has she looked my way yet .
I hear Dante open the door and her head starts to follow his movements, flinching a little when he gets closer. She was keeping an eye on him, just as I used to do with the ‘uncles’.
I hoped with all my heart while driving up here that she would be safe, that Pa only just got her here and she hadn’t gone through any of the torment I had faced. But by the panic on her face, she went through trauma.
I want to kill Pa.
I see red as pure rage fills me, my hands vibrate from adrenaline. But I know I can’t let her feel my anger. I have to keep calm until she is safe in the car. After that I can beat his ass. Julian’s earlier words are now lighting a fire under me.
It’s time to get angry.
“Anya, look at me sweetheart,” I gently turn her face to face me , yet her eyes stay on Dante. “I promise, we aren’t going to hurt you. We just need to find a way to break the lock.”
“I got it.” Dante whispers, holding up a small black case full of…
something, and starts fiddling with the padlock.
Thirty-two seconds pass in agonising silence before we hear a small click.
The collar loosens from around her neck and she curls up into a ball on the floor.
I notice she isn’t wearing anything other than the t-shirt.
Nothing but the shirt. Dante notices too as he covers her legs with his jacket before attempting to lift her.
She whimpers and he automatically backs away, holding up his hands to show he’s not a threat .