30. Chapter Thirty
And the text between Sal and Penelope Mondragon says, “Let’s set up a meeting and discuss Malloy.”
* * *
We make a salad for dinner, but I don’t allow Christina just a pile of lettuce. The salad is filled with color, and I convince her that if we shred up a chicken breast, it will keep us fuller.
As I toss it all together, she reaches her fingers into the bowl and pulls out a slice of carrot and nibbles on it.
“Did your mother teach you to make that?” she teases.
“Why, yes she did,” I say, picking up the bowl and carrying it to the table. “Vegetables are great, but they can taste good too.”
Christina picks up our glasses of wine and carries them to the table.
We each take a seat, and I dish out the salad.
Loki is lying by the patio door on a blanket that Christina set on the cold floor for him. He’s at home in her space.
“Milo says Loki doesn’t usually take to women,” she says as she lifts her wine to her lips and watches me from over her glass.
I look over at Loki and back to her. “I suppose he’s right. He’s usually curious, but then goes on his way. With you, he gets excited to see you and snuggles up to you.”
“So, you didn’t say all those nasty things about me to him like you did to Milo?”
The fork full of salad that I just put in my mouth will choke me if I try to swallow now.
I chew mindfully and follow it with a sip of wine.
“Did Milo say that to you?” I ask.
She shrugs as she takes a bite of her salad. “He mentioned that this thing between us is weird because you’ve made comments about us working together in the past, like maybe it was difficult.”
I sip my wine again. “I’ve said that.” It gnaws at me now. “I’m sorry.”
Christina shakes her head. “Don’t be sorry. My mother thinks you’re using me to get to my father. She’s not on board either. I haven’t been too kind about what I say about you, it seems.”
“I never should have talked about you to anyone. I guess if I had a problem with you, I should have talked to you about that.”
The corner of her mouth curls up. “Then we wouldn’t have been enemies, would we?”
“I guess not.”
“I like this better,” she says, then pulls her bottom lip through her teeth.
“I’ll never talk bad about you again,” I promise.
“No matter what, we’re friends?”
Oh, I want so much more than that now. I don’t know why this change has come over me. All I want is that part in her father’s movie.
No, that’s all I had wanted.
I hold out my hand to her, and when she takes it, I pull her from her chair and guide her toward me. I ease her down on my lap and wrap my arms around her.
She steadies herself with an arm around my shoulders. Her chest rises and falls with her breath. I’ve surprised her by making this move, but it excites me to have her here.
I lift my hand to her neck and graze the tender skin with my fingertips as I lift them into her hair and guide her to my mouth.
Her eyes close as her mouth opens to mine. Christina slides her tongue against mine and the taste of wine intoxicates me more than drinking it.
Her fingers wind up into my hair and this kiss steals my breath.
Without releasing one another, or lessening the kiss, Christina moves from sitting on my lap to straddling me. Her skirt rises up her thighs and I can feel her warmth against me.
My fingers grip her hips as she bites down on my bottom lip.
I flinch and Christina pulls back.
“I’m sorry. Did I hurt you?” she asks breathlessly.
“No. You just surprised me.”
“I should—” She lifts from my lap as if she’s going to climb off, and I ease her back.
“Don’t move,” I whisper my words against her neck before I brush my lips across her throat. “I want you right where you are.”
My mouth finds hers again, and the warmth of her, all of her, makes my body ache.
I slide my hands up the outsides of her thighs until my fingertips are under the hem of her skirt. Her tongue sweeps my mouth, and I can feel the moan that escapes her.
I press her to me, my erection straining beneath her.
Christina’s mouth pulls from mine, and her head falls back, aligning me with her breasts. The V-neck of the dress accentuates the swells of softness, which she guides my head toward.
I pepper kisses over the soft skin as Christina moves against me, making that erection she’s created twitch beneath her.
My grip on her ass gets tighter, and I maneuver us so that when I stand, she’s wrapped around my waist.
Her mouth comes back to mine, and I carry her to the couch in the living room.
I ease us both down, her dress now up around her waist, and her legs parting to make room for my body.
I bury my face against her neck. “God, Christina,” I say as she wraps her legs around me. “I don’t know how long I can last with you.”
She moves to look at me. “I’m okay. We can do this.”
I smile at her desperation, and then I consider it.
Her body moves beneath me, but I can’t take her now. I can’t just have sex with her because my dick is uncomfortable in my pants.
She presses up against me again, finding my mouth and dragging me under with hers. I can’t imagine ever tiring of kissing her.
With her mouth on mine, I’m drowning in her. The thought that we got here because we were discussing what I’d told Milo about her sends a sharp pain through my chest.
A month ago, I dreaded seeing this woman, and now she’s consuming me as she grinds against me.
I want this. God, do I want this.
But it can’t just be me taking her on the couch.
This woman has never been important to anyone, but she is to me now. If I’m going to have sex with her, it needs to mean something. She needs to know that she’s special. I need to make her feel special.
My thoughts are distracted when I catch a glimpse of Loki walking by. His collar and tags clank as he walks through the room.
I ease up, and Christina turns her head to see him.
The heat between us begins to settle.
A smile forms on her lips, and she looks up at me. “I forgot he was here,” she whispers because I think that’s all she has breath for.
“Yeah,” I say, sitting back and looking at her beneath me.
The lace of her bra peeks out of the dress that has been bunched up. Her panties are delicate lace that begs for me to remove them.
I adjust myself before climbing off the couch and reaching for her.
Her brows are drawn in and worry masks her face.
“What’s wrong?” she asks as she takes my hand and stands.
“I should take him home.”
“You can stay,” she says. “I’m okay with all of this.”
Pressing my forehead to hers, I breathe in to calm my body. Though touching her, smelling her, makes that calm fight me.
“I want to.” I groan. “You have no idea,” I say, but she knows what I’m fighting below the belt. “This isn’t how I want to do this. You deserve better.”
Christina lets go of me and takes a step back from me. She fixes her dress and hugs her arms around herself. “I guess you’re right. We should think more about this.”
“I think it’s a good idea. Don’t go getting into your head that I don’t want to do this. I just don’t want to take you on the couch while my dog roams through your house.”
She looks at Loki and then back at me. “It’s fine.”
I reach for her, but she moves again. “Christina, don’t shut down on me.”
“Maybe it’s time for you to go. I mean, you did tell Milo that you’d be home.” She bats her eyes and I wonder if she’s going to cry. “Besides, I have to get to the set early tomorrow. We’re filming outside, and they want to catch the light.”
I nod and move to her. This time she lets me touch her.
“I’ll see you in the morning,” I say, and she nods. “This changes nothing.”
I lift her chin with my finger and direct her gaze to me.
“This is real. You know that, right?” I ask, looking for her confirmation.
She studies me before she nods. I worry that she’s as confused as I am, but I know what love and respect feel like. She doesn’t. She’s going to worry that I’m just playing with her.
I need to make this something she’ll never forget or question. As far as I’m concerned, I’m all in now. Sure, I want that role in the movie, and I want that extended contract for the network, but I want Christina too.