Chapter 21 #2
Coach paused, and his eyes sweep over the room in a dramatic fashion, gaze catching on me for a prolonged moment.
We both knew I wasn’t all-in this game. To make matters worse, Landon was being assessed for a concussion, which meant we were down our best goalie.
I needed to be present, but no matter how many times I tried to pull myself together, my thoughts kept drifting to her.
Grace had never been a distraction on the ice, not until now.
“We are the better team, and we are more than capable of handling a pest like Henderson. Don’t let his chaos distract you.”
Even the sound of his name made me grimace.
Since the first whistle, the only things that seemed to shock me out of my distracted stupor were the asshole’s explosive hits and smart mouth.
Each dig thrown my way felt like another broken thread in the rope holding together my control.
It didn’t help that the jackass was responsible for Landon’s injury.
The entire team had a bone to pick with him, and I was nearly at my breaking point.
“Let’s get out there and show them what we can do!”
A chorus of chanted “Ravens” rose from the group as we filed out of the locker room and back into the noisy arena.
I tried my hardest to concentrate on the task at hand: winning this game.
But it wasn’t enough to stop the nauseating sense of déjà vu that fell over me as I returned to the ice.
I’d been here once before, with another girl on my mind at another consequential game.
But tonight, the stakes were a great deal higher.
The girl in question had a much stronger hold over my heart, and I was fighting for more than a title—I was fighting for my future career.
“I got your back, okay?”
Bryce’s voice was a much-needed reminder that my teammates were relying on me.
There could be no more distractions. This is your future, Sebastian.
Henderson took his place across from me.
For one blissful moment, the roar of the spectators softened to a low thrum.
With the blade of my stick against the ice, I watched the referee lean down between us, the puck clutched in his hand.
There was barely a flicker of movement before it dropped and my stick was cutting across the center circle.
Carbon met rubber with a loud smack, and the puck shot perfectly into Kent’s waiting stick.
My sense of hearing returned a moment later when the booming crowd blinked back into existence.
Within the first few minutes of the second period, Penn State grew more desperate.
Every moment we kept the puck away from them was another crack in Henderson’s already flimsy restraint, especially after Bishop scored our second goal.
He came crashing through our players like a wrecking ball any chance he got, and it didn’t take long for their sloppiness to work to our advantage.
After a breakaway from Bishop and a beautiful assist from me, Kent slammed the puck between the pipes, securing us even bigger lead.
But the excitement of our goal wasn’t enough to hold my focus.
In the back of my mind, I was rereading those text messages.
I’ll be at your game, just like I promised.
I spent every free second desperately eyeing the packed arena, searching for her among the masses, convinced the sight of her face would end this insanity.
“Evans! Get your ass out there!”
Yet again, it took Coach Dawson screaming my name to notice that I’d nearly missed the line shift.
With ice once again under my skates, I tore across the rink and threw myself into the thick of things.
The entire time, I felt like I was being pulled in different directions.
I just needed to see Grace once. That’s all it would take for me to get back into this game.
In a moment of recklessness, with the game moving at full speed around me, I scanned the stands.
Relief flooded my system when I saw a familiar head of blond hair jumping up and down: Caroline, and beside her was Lydia.
I followed the long line of hockey players squished together in the row, my eyes peeled for Grace.
None of them were her. Each pass over the group drove a dagger of disappointment deeper into my gut.
She said she would be here—why isn’t she?
The blade twisted.
My momentary lapse in concentration meant I had no warning to brace for the hit.
A large force pummeled into my back, launching me forward and into the plexiglass with a loud whack.
My teeth rattled as my bucket smacked against the barrier, and I felt my lip split against the bars of my cage.
Hot iron flooded my mouth. Distantly, I heard the whistle blow, but nothing mattered outside of Henderson’s arrogant smirk.
The world shifted to red as I launched myself at the asshole and took him down, my fists swinging.
Logic evaded me. There was only burning rage, no common sense left to temper the anger.
Henderson’s flailing arm clipped my chin and knocked my helmet free.
I scrambled forward to land another hit, even as someone pulled me away, my fists punching nothing but air.
It wasn’t until Bryce’s face filled my vision that the world around me slammed back into place.
Thump. Thump.Thump. All I could hear was my own pulse booming in my ear, and the referee shouting something unintelligible from behind me.
A few more seconds passed before the full force of my actions walloped me over the head.
For the first time in my entire hockey career, I was about to be disqualified for a major penalty—one that would assure my ass got plenty of bench time.
A game disqualification meant that I was automatically suspended from our next match.
Even with that knowledge, I couldn’t stop myself from searching through the thousands of blurry dots in the arena.
But she wasn’t there. I’d spent years searching the stands for my father’s face, knowing he wouldn’t be there, that he couldn’t, but somehow, this felt even worse.
In my utter desperation to feel her support, to know that she was out there like she promised, I’d thrown all my convictions to the wind.
After all this time, Grace turned out to be everything I feared she would be: a colossal distraction.
>> <<
Grace
This could not be happening. I could not miss a single moment of Sebastian’s game.
This was my penance for standing him up last night—being accosted by a pound of melted cheese just moments into the second period.
I heard the distinct swell of cheering that indicated something exciting had happened, but there was nothing I could do in my current state of undress.
I desperately scrubbed the synthetically colored cheese from my DU-branded sweatshirt, hunched over the sink inside the women’s restroom at DuLane.
It would have been easy to blame the inebriated Penn State fan who’d collided with me in an explosion of nacho cheese and jalapenos, but I was a firm believer in karma.
I deserved worse than a cheesy shirt after blowing Sebastian off to get drunk with my roommates.
I wrung out the moisture and held the material under the hand dryer, considering ditching it altogether and walking to my seat in nothing but a bra.
How many topless guys had I been forced to watch on the big screen, their hairy, paint-covered chests displayed for the world?
Gross. But I couldn’t risk getting kicked out, not when I’d promised Sebastian I’d be here.
Desperate not to miss any more action, I fished out my phone and pulled up Sam’s contact.
She had an extra jacket I could wear, even if it might be a little snug.
Before I could press Call, the screen flashed with an incoming notification.
A flutter of nerves filled my stomach. It was Gabby.
“Hello?”
My greeting was met with the unmistakable sound of crying. On the other end, Gabby was gasping for breath as sobs spilled out of her.
“It’s Dad,” she wailed, barely intelligible though the crying. “He—I think he’s having a heart attack. The ambulance is coming now.”
The fear in her voice sent me straight into big-sister mode. I responded as calmly as possible, shoving down my own feelings of panic.
“Where are you?”
“At home.”
“Is he conscious?”
There was a short pause before she responded, “Yes, still conscious. He’s having a hard time breathing, and he was dizzy before I made him sit down. But his chest hurts.”
I could hear the muffled sound of my father on the other end of the line.
“Is he speaking with the dispatcher? Did they say when the paramedics would arrive?”
Gabby sniffled and said, “They should be here within the next few minutes. He’s talking to them.”
A small breath whooshed out of my lungs.“That’s a good sign, Gabby. He’s alert and speaking.”
“I’m so scared.” Her words were barely a whisper.
“I’m right here. I’ll stay on the line until they get there, okay?”
Silent tears streamed down my face, but I couldn’t let her sense my distress. Right now, I had to stay strong for my little sister.
“Okay, they’re here.”
There was an onslaught of muffled voices coming from the line.
With shaking hands, I put the call on speaker and sent an SOS text to Sam.
I could hear bits and pieces of the conversation, though it was hard to make out more than a few words through the phone.
When things quieted down, I called Gabby’s name.
It took three times before she finally answered.
“They’re taking him to St. Jude’s. They said I could ride in the ambulance with them.”
Thank goodness.
“I’m going to have Sam take me straight to the hospital. I’ll be there in under two hours, okay?” Though I couldn’t see her, I imagined Gabby was bobbing her head up and down in a nod. “Call me if anything changes.”
The line went dead a moment later. I pulled the phone away from my ear just as Sam flew through the bathroom door. “I can’t believe Gabby called—”
“Heart attack,” I croaked. “My dad is having a heart attack. They’re taking him to the hospital now. He’s alert.”
Sam’s eyes grew wide and then she was asking me questions about his vital signs that I didn’t know the answers to.
At the same time, she took off her sweatshirt and pulled it over my head.
I told her what I knew, starting with the fact that he was alert and talking to the first responders.
Again, she inquired about his vital signs, but I just shook my head and asked if she would take me to the hospital.
“Can you let Caroline and Lydia know we’re leaving?”
“Of course. I’ll be right back.”
I followed Sam out of the bathroom and watched her run toward the rink entrance.
The concourse was silent, save for the echo of her shoes smacking across the floor.
Wiping the tears from my face, I braced myself for the oncoming wave of shame.
It had been weeks since I’d spoken with my father.
My phone contained countless unanswered texts and missed calls from him.
I couldn’t deal with the truth about my mother, so instead of talking to my father like an adult, I’d ignored him.
I packed away the hurt and shoved it down like I did with all the other feelings I couldn’t face.
In the distance, a door slammed. Craning my neck, I peered down the empty concourse as a figure came into view.
With each slow step he took in my direction, it became easier to make out the familiar shape of Sebastian.
But as he grew closer, I noticed there was blood crusted on the corner of his mouth and a light bruise forming across his cheekbone.
He looked absolutely worn down, like the life had been sucked right out of him.
His brows were pulled together, green eyes unfocused as he walked with his hands hanging limply at his sides.
I knew once our gazes connected that something was terribly wrong.
I’d only just begun to call out his name when Sebastian’s mouth curled into a snarl.
He wasn’t looking at me the way he normally did.
Even months ago, when we were feuding over the training space, I’d never seen such brazen hate behind his eyes. A stranger stood before me.
“I should have listened to logic,” he said with a shake of his head. “I should have trusted my gut when it told me you were nothing more than a pretty distraction.”
I took a step closer, but Sebastian flinched away, as if he couldn’t stand the thought of touching me. What the hell was going on?
“What happened? Were you hurt—”
“I can’t do this anymore,” he snapped.
Is this some sort of joke?
“That’s not funny, Sebastian.”
“I’m not being funny. I’m being honest. I know that’s a hard concept for you to understand, but not everyone is afraid to speak the truth.”
“You don’t mean that,” I said, trying to convince myself as well as him.
There were footsteps in the distance, someone coming up behind me. I searched his face, my eyes traveling over the slope of his nose and the familiar set of his lips for any sign of affection. I couldn’t see anything past the fury burning in his eyes.
This was all just a terrible nightmare. It had to be.
“I’m so sorry about last night, and I’m sorry I made you feel used. Please, just hear me out. You have to hear me out.”
His voice was low when he spoke next, but there was no mistaking his words. “You were a mistake, and whatever you thought we had, it’s not real.”
I reached out for him, but he only took another hasty step away.
“Don’t touch me. Just leave me the fuck alone.”
A gasp sounded from behind me. I didn’t have the energy to chase after him as he turned to leave; all the fight in me was gone. I’m not going to leave you, Grace. His promise was etched into my memory. I would never do that. I guessed it had all been a lie.
“What the hell is going on?” Sam stepped into view, my roommates at her side. They all shared the same horrified expressions.
“I don’t know, but I need to get going.”
My voice hitched as another wave of tears threatened to break free. I had a feeling that if they did, I’d need another twenty minutes in the bathroom to collect myself. That was time I didn’t have, not when my father was on his way to the hospital and my sister needed me.
“Take all the time you need,” Sam said, reaching out to squeeze my hand. “When you’re ready, we’ll get you out of here.”
I didn’t need any time. All I wanted was to leave and never look back.